


Pathokinesis

by DarknessBound



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Blow Jobs, Castiel Wears Panties (Supernatural), Castiel and Dean Winchester are Roommates, Castiel is So Done with Dean Winchester, Cock Warming, College Student Castiel, Construction Worker Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester Has a Panty Kink, Dirty Dean Winchester, Dirty Talk, Dom/sub Play, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Feminine Pet Names, Friends to Lovers, Frottage, Hand Kink, Happy Ending, Jealous Dean Winchester, Jock Straps, M/M, Murder Mystery, Mutual Pining, POV Castiel (Supernatural), POV Dean Winchester, POV Impala (Supernatural), Public Sex, Sex Coupons, Sex in/on the Impala (Supernatural), Slow Burn, Sweet/Hot, Switching, Twilight Bashing, idiots to lovers, minor off screen character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:53:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 33
Words: 116,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26465968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarknessBound/pseuds/DarknessBound
Summary: Fake dating your best friend to help him out with a college project should be a piece of cake… unless someone catches feelings. The problem is, in Dean’s experience? Someone always catches feelings.
Relationships: Ares Montague/Jaskier Morningstar, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Original Male Character/Original Male Character
Comments: 708
Kudos: 576
Collections: The Destiel Fan Survey Favs Collection





	1. Clap Your Hands If You Believe

**Author's Note:**

> As always, thanks times infinity to my incredible artist/beta, I_Am_The_Blue_Sunshine, and my returning alphas CeliPuff and Ketch22. Thank you all for dealing with my insane ramblings during this, and laughing with me when this fic got WAY hotter than it needed to be.

**Dean**

“Nothin’ like some burgers on a hot summer day. I’m glad we chose the townhouse with a damn patio.” Dean stood in the doorway watching his best friend stare at his laptop so intently it looked like he was reading another language. _So glad I skipped college._ “What’s goin’ on in the land of Banana Hammocks? Doesn’t the semester start next month?”

Cas barely flinched. “Slugs, Dean. We’re the Banana Sl— nevermind.” He sighed, finally looking up from his screen. “And yes, it starts in a couple of weeks. A few of my professors have already put the syllabuses up.” 

“Overachiever,” Dean teased, walking over to lean in and hover. “What kinda class is this? Communications or some shit?”

He moved over a little bit so Dean could see better and shook his head. “Not really, but... I suppose you could take it like that. It’s for relationship psychology, though yes, this particular class deals mostly with how to build communication within relationships, or repair broken communication.”

Dean made a ‘huh’ noise and started scrolling nosily, earning a Castiel bitch face. “What? I’m bored.”

“You’re going to burn the food.” Cas swatted his hand and tried to nudge him out of the way. “Besides, I have to figure out how the hell I’m going to survive this course given the contents of this syllabus, and I can’t do that with you clicking all over the screen.”

“Shit!” Dean darted outside to flip the burgers. “Almost burned burgers reading boring shit... turnin’ into you, Cas. Your nerd is contagious.”

Cas laughed quietly and yelled through the open sliding glass door, “I heard that!” Dean peeked his head back in and Cas grinned at him. “Though, I wish your ability to build things was contagious.”

“If only. That Ikea table took you an entire day, and then you almost lit it on fire.” Dean laughed and went to grab the cheese from the fridge.

Grumbling, Cas threw a pillow at him. “You refused to help me! It would have been done in ten minutes if you weren’t laughing at me so hard.”

“That was the best shit I seen all year. Course I coulda helped you, but the internet was out.” Dean shrugged and walked back out to the patio, leaving Cas’ throw pillow on the floor.

A few minutes later, Cas came out with plates to help him out. “You can knock that table all you want, but next time… you’re doing it. You’re the big, tough, construction worker, after all. _Construct_ us a better table.”

“And you're the smart, nerdy college boy. You mean to tell me those instructions got one over on _the_ Castiel Novak? The one that got ‘most likely to succeed’ in high school?” Dean nudged him playfully and Cas looked pleased with himself as he reached for the spatula. 

“They were half in Swedish, Dean, and that’s _not_ one of the five languages I know.”

“Mmhmm... excuses. Ikea kicked your skinny ass. Paws off the grill, you know I’m the meat man here.” Dean snatched the spatula back and put the patty in Cas’ bun for him.

Sighing, Cas fixed his burger and stepped away from the grill. “Ironic. I’m usually the one handling _meat.”_

“Hey... I know my way around some meat.” Dean winked and walked over with his food to sit on their patio chair. 

For the most part, Dean dated chicks, but he’d had his fair share of college experimenting... minus the college.

They were halfway done eating when their neighbors from across the way came out to see what smelled so good. Jask rolled his eyes when he saw Dean had only made enough for the two of them. “Where’s mine, dick?”

“I dunno, your dick is Ares’ job to keep track of. Did you check under your bed?” Dean took an obnoxiously huge bite and smiled teasingly.

Cas ate quietly, watching more than talking like he always did, and Ares laughed loudly as Jask smacked him. “It’s his balls I keep under the bed, not his dick.” 

“Ah... makes sense.” Dean mumbled around his food. “There’s more patties if you guys are hungry. Toss ’em on, junkless.”

They did, and by the time theirs were ready, Dean was ready for dessert. Cas was giving him a weird look as he went to take their plates inside. “What?”

“So, it’s just _my_ paws that need to be kept off, hm?” He smiled playfully, taking the edge off the words and stretched his leg out so he could step on Dean’s foot before he sat again. 

“Hey, he can burn his food all he wants. I gotta make sure you and I have perfect burgers every time, Cas. Gotta reputation to uphold. Want some pie?”

Cas opened his mouth to respond but Jask cut him off. “Pie? Damn, we got here at the right time.” Cas tilted his head and shook it slightly, exhaling like he was trying to meditate.

“Actually, we were going to go to my brother’s house for the pie, and he’s terribly unwelcoming to strangers. Maybe we’ll bring you some back?”

Dean could never express how much he loved his best friend. He just saved him from needing to share his pie. _Is it weird to platonically propose to your friend for saving your pie?_ “Yup. Goin’ out for dessert, J. Sorry not sorry.” Dean sat back with a grin.

Ares looked like he knew exactly what was going on, but didn’t ruin it. “I’ll go make us pie, how about that?” He rubbed Jask’s head lovingly. 

_God, they’re adorable._ “Make us one too, neighbor.” _Can’t go wrong with more pie._

Laughing, Ares dragged Jask back over to their side of the street and disappeared back into the house. Cas chuckled quietly and reached for a potato chip. “Do I get brownie points for that?”

“Hell yeah! I owe you a big one for that. Asshat would have demolished that pie.” Dean stood up and started cleaning the grill. He always took good care of it, and made a face at the state J left it in. “Ugh, he didn’t try at all to clean this damn grease off, he’s not allowed to touch my grill either, anymore.”

Cas grinned and started grabbing everything else to take it back inside. After a couple of trips, the grill was clean, so Dean followed him back inside. Cas shut the dishwasher and nodded toward the pie. “We better hurry.”

_Genius!_ “Hell yeah, J is like a damn shark. He can smell food a mile away.” _Probably learned from the best._

They skipped the plates entirely and Cas handed him a fork. “Sounds like someone else I know. I don’t know how Ares and I put up with you two.”

“Probably because we’re adorable.” Dean took a bite with a grin. “Or at least I am... J needs a haircut. It’s outta control.”

Cas laughed and stole a forkful of pie. “You’re both out of control. But, I don’t envy Ares... he actually has to _date_ Jask. I get to send you away to date other people.”

Dean scoffed. “Don’t play. You know you cry into the pillow every time I go on a date.” _Yeah right, dude’s way outta my league, bet he dates a damn doctor or some other smart shit._

“What can I say? I’m a sympathetic crier, and my heart breaks for all of those poor women.” Cas’ eyes twinkled and he took another bite, then pushed off from the counter. “Speaking of which, what happened to the last girl?”

“For one... she hated pie. Dealbreaker, Cas.” He stated as though it was obvious. _Plus she like... wanted a husband already and... no._ “Onto the next.”

The eye roll he received was epic. “I’d have thought you’d want to date someone that doesn’t like pie… more for you.” He sat down in the living room, still within sight of Dean. “How long do you think we have before those two break down the door?”

“Doesn’t like pie is okay... but hate? I don’t trust someone who hates pie and thinks cake is superior.” Dean kept eating. “Dunno, I should probably just finish it off to be safe.”

Cas flipped through the channels as Dean wolfed down the rest of the pie and eventually stopped on one. “There’s a game on, do you want to watch it? I need to start doing research.”

Dean sat back with a loud groan. _Shouldn’t have ate all that... shit._ He rubbed his belly and pushed the tray away. “Uh... yeah. Gimme a minute to stand.”

“You’re an animal,” Cas said, but Dean could plainly hear the fondness in his voice. “Take all the time you need, just... don’t bother me for the next several months.”

“Months? That’s impossible. You know how needy I am for your attention. Write about that, schoolboy.” Dean called out as Cas took his laptop and disappeared into his room.

When he finally managed to get up off the chair, he cleaned up his pie mess and plopped on the couch to watch the game. Basketball wasn’t his favorite sport, but it was better than nothing. He couldn’t wait for football season.

Living with Cas was awesome. His scholarship paid his side of the rent with no issues and he was clean... much cleaner than Dean, and it helped him pick up some good habits. 

He had work in the morning, so he didn’t watch too long before he was drifting off to sleep. Working at 5am every day was rough, but unless he wanted to roast in the summer sun, it was necessary with a construction job. Dean didn’t even try to make it to his bed, he slumped over in his jeans and passed out.

**Castiel**

_How in the hell am I going to pull this off?_ Cas rolled over in his bed, staring up at the ceiling. _Classes haven’t even officially begun yet, and I’m already stressed out. Remind me again why I picked this major…? Oh, right. Because I’m forever alone, and if the adage is to be believed… those who can’t do, teach._

He eventually convinced himself to get up and go make himself some breakfast and a cup of coffee. Dean was already gone, like he was nearly every morning, which meant Cas could bum around in his boxers all day if he wanted to. And he _absolutely_ wanted to. 

“Okay,” he muttered to himself as he booted his laptop. “No big deal, just need to find a good way for couples to communicate without therapy. Shouldn’t be too hard, right?” 

But after a couple of hours searching around and finding nothing that wasn’t already a tried-and-true practice, he shut his laptop with a groan and gave up. _Doesn’t matter anyway, it’s not like I have a boyfriend to test it on. I’ll be making up a majority of that final project either way._

By noon, Cas was bored enough he actually started cleaning, and when Dean finally walked in the door, everything was spotless. He grinned at his roommate but it faded quickly as he pointed at Dean’s muddy boots. “Strip. I just cleaned, and you’re filthy.”

“ _You’re_ filthy.” Dean retorted and slipped out of his boots. “Smells good in here. You clean to avoid thinking again?”

Blushing, Cas denied it despite it being completely accurate. Dean always had a funny way of seeing right through him. “I don’t do that. Dinner’s in the oven though, which is probably at least part of what you’re smelling.” 

“Yup. Starvin’! Gotta shower first though.” Dean ran up the stairs and Cas could tell he stopped in the washroom to strip first.

When he came back down, Cas had dinner on the table. He eyed Dean’s wet, adorably messy hair and nodded to his plate. “Please tell me you didn’t leave your dirty clothes in a pile on my floor again.”

“It’s the washroom’s floor. And no, I started them.” He rolled his eyes and sat down to check out the spread of food. “I seriously got it made here.”

Cas sighed heavily. “Semantics, Dean. The ‘washroom’ is in my room. And maybe if you’ve got it made here, you should stop sassing me.”

“You’re the sassy one here, Cas. I’m the nice one that is very thankful for dinner.” He grinned and took a bite. “So, what were you avoiding?”

He started eating, hoping if he waited long enough Dean would change the subject... but he didn’t. “So, the teachers that were nice enough to give us the syllabus also included the final projects on there. The one I was stressing about the other day... I have no idea what I’m going to do for it.”

“What is it?” Dean mumbled around his food and then laughed ridiculously hard when a piece fell out of his mouth.

“I have to find a way, existing or otherwise, that isn’t currently utilized by relationship psychologists as a method of encouraging communications between couples, particularly when one party doesn’t wish to go to _actual_ therapy.”

“You can try ecstasy. Couples would spill all that shit in 45 minutes no prob.” Dean chuckled and took another bite.

Having been one of those people not that long ago, Cas shuddered. “I don’t think that would be a good idea.” 

“Ehh, probably not. Oh, what about building furniture together, or like a weekend with no technology. I mean they’re boring but force them to communicate right?”

Cas was impressed, but shook his head. “Both are already well-accepted methods.” He kept eating, pushing the food around on his plate. “I’ll figure it out. I have all semester.”

“Yeah, you’ll get it. Smartest guy I know.” He winked and finished his first plate and loaded another, which at least distracted him from the fact that Cas was blushing… again. 

After they cleaned up, Cas glanced at Dean from the corner of his eye. “You have a date tomorrow, right? I invited Ares over.”

“Yup. Too bad Ares is taken, maybe we’d both get laid.” Dean plopped on the couch and started flipping the channels.

Cas clicked his tongue. “Ares isn’t my type. Believe it or not, I’d be more likely to end up with Jask.”

“Ugh... I can see it. Ares is more my type. Wanna watch Cops and laugh at dumb people?” He patted the couch.

_Opposites always attract._ Cas nodded, throwing himself on the couch and putting his feet in Dean’s lap. He didn’t mean anything behind it, they just didn’t have a lot of room. “I’m always here for a good laugh.” 

Dean sat back and held onto his legs absentmindedly. “People are crazy, man, especially when getting arrested.”

“Wouldn’t you be? I can’t say I’d handle it with a whole lot of dignity. And say whatever you want, we both know you’d be screaming something stupid just for show, like... ‘fight the fairies’.” Cas grinned, watching the way Dean gallic shrugged. 

“Fight the fairies. I hope you know, I am 100% yellin’ that if I ever get arrested. I promise.” He squeezed the ticklish part on Cas’ thigh and laughed as Cas squirmed so hard he nearly fell off the couch.

“Damnit, Dean.” He smacked his calf and pushed himself back up onto the couch, then tried to focus on the tv. “Look, we missed all the good stuff… why is that lady getting arrested?”

“Uhh... meth.” Dean grabbed the remote to rewind. “It’s always the same. She called the cops and now she’s going to jail for bein’ loaded. Wanna beer?” Dean got up and walked toward the kitchen, and Cas took the opportunity to check out his ass as he walked.

_Not illegal to look._ “Sure, I’ll take one.” He accepted the bottle when Dean came back and took a sip, nearly spitting it back out when the meth lady tried to shove her boobs in the officer’s face. “Gods, I’m glad we don’t do drugs.”

“Same. Just booze.” Dean held out his drink for a cheers and took a sip. “Poor cop didn’t see it comin’. You and Ares got any plans tomorrow, or just hangin’ out?”

Cas jerked one shoulder up and put his legs back in Dean’s lap. “I don’t know yet. It just depends, I think, on what Jask is doing. If he’ll be around, Ares will probably just come here for a couple of hours.”

“Yeah, he’s clingy,” Dean joked. “I hate dates with new people. Tempted to cancel.”

“You’re just as clingy as he is, don’t even try to deny it.” Cas raised an eyebrow and tried to wrap his lips around the neck of the bottle, but the angle was weird and some spilled out. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “What’s she like?”

“Drink much?” Dean chuckled. “She has a nice ass and drives an old Porsche. Hoping she lets me drive it.”

_Stellar reasons to date someone._ “No wonder you said Ares is your type, then. If ‘nice ass’ and ‘nice car’ are the only criteria…” Cas smirked, knocking his kneecap against Dean’s chest. 

“Not the _only_ criteria, but it’s all I know about her so far. I’ll report in after the date... or maybe the next morning. Might be a good night.” He wiggled his eyebrows.

“I suppose it’s a good thing I’m not back in class yet. She can be as loud as she wants.” Cas stood up, draining his beer and heading over to toss the bottle.

“Yeah? Like to listen, huh?” Dean clicked his tongue and winked. “I know your secrets, Novak. I’ll put on a good show for you.”

Cas eyed him with a rebuttal on his tongue, but stopped. Whatever he was going to say was going to be a lie, because he _did_ like to listen, and Dean _did_ know his secrets. 

_Well, most of them, anyway._

~~~~

Dean had been typically irritating before his date, checking his hair every twelve seconds and asking Cas if he looked okay - which had to be the most useless question of all time. _Of course he looks okay, he always looks okay._

When Ares showed up, Cas was ready for a drink. “Are we staying in, or going out? Your call.”

“Long week? Let’s go out, you’ve been cooped up for days, Rocky’s?” Ares offered with a knowing smile. If anyone knew how it was to live with such a big personality, it was Ares.

That sounded great, so Cas excused himself to change into something more appropriate and followed him out. They took Ares’ car over to the bar, which meant Cas was free to get as drunk as he wanted. _Hell, maybe we’ll both get laid, after all._

They sat at the bar and ordered drinks but before they could be served, Ares turned to face him. “Have you two seriously never...”

Oblivious, Cas raised his eyebrows. “Who? Me and Benny?” He flicked his eyes toward the bartender and bit back a laugh. “He’s not really my type.”

“Not Benny. Dean... you know, your roommate.” Ares rolled his eyes and thanked Ben for the drink.

“Oh.” Cas flushed and picked his glass up, shaking his head. “No, why would we? He’s been one of my best friends since high school. What we have... works.” _Not to mention, the man is so afraid of commitment it could actually be considered a phobia._

“I get it, really. But I swear you guys have some kind of connection. Is it really purely platonic? Have you ever been... curious? And I’m sorry for the 20 questions, I’ve been wanting to ask and I’ve bit my tongue for months. I can’t help it.” He took a drink and met Cas’ eyes. “It’s okay, I won’t even tell Jask anything.”

For some reason, Cas trusted Ares. Maybe it was because they were so similar, it was basically like trusting himself. “Curious? Maybe a little. I mean, I’ve heard him have sex enough times to know he’s good at it. And anyone with eyes can see he’s attractive, but yes, it’s purely platonic. I don’t see him as anything more than the best friend I’ve ever had.”

Ares nodded and held out his glass. “Want me to help you get laid, or just drink and play some pool?”

Cas let out a sigh and clinked their glasses. “The fact that I need help at all suggests we should just stick to getting obliterated and playing pool, although... I’m not very good at that, either.”

“I’m not either.” Ares laughed. “Let’s just have a good night with no pesky roommates... and yes, Jask is more than my roommate, but he drove me crazy today so he’s back to roommate status now.”

Laughing, Cas glanced around the bar. “Wish I could demote Dean some days, but it doesn’t work like that for me.” No one caught his eye, so he settled down at the bar and confirmed his decision. “And yes, just a good night. There’s no one here for me, anyway.”


	2. What Is and What Should Never Be

**Dean**

When Dean woke up, Cas was still in bed.  _ Musta had a good night. _ He walked downstairs with a chuckle and started some coffee. 

He turned on his record player but kept it low, and started making breakfast while the coffee brewed. To keep it down, he lip synched and played air instruments, letting Cas get all the sleep he needed.

That lasted about twenty minutes, because he came thundering slowly down the stairs. Dean turned to say good morning and found Cas with his hair sticking up all over the place, and the grumpiest expression he’d ever seen. His voice was raspy as hell, too. “Water.”

“Well, you look lovely. Feelin’ alright?” Dean got him some water and handed him their handy bottle of aspirin. “Sit. Coffee and breakfast comin’.”

All he got in response was a grunt, then the crinkle of an empty water bottle and a gasp. “Fuck, I think our neighbor tried to kill me.”

“It’s always the quiet ones. Wanna beer?” Dean teased, just to see that adorable bitch face. “If looks could kill... I’d be dead. Years ago dead.”

Cas devoured his breakfast with an unholy moan, then made quick work of his coffee. He seemed to come to life a little after that and even did the dishes. “So, did you manage to add another notch to your bedpost last night? I think I was too drunk to hear.”

“Nope. She denied me.” Dean ran a finger down his cheek like a fake tear. “Nah, I’ll probably get it tonight or tomorrow though, she was practically dry humpin’ me as she said she ‘doesn’t put out on the first date’.” He shrugged, “I offered tomorrow and she said yes. I don’t get why _tomorrow_ is any different than _right_ _then,_ but chicks are confusing.”

His roommate grinned. “You should date more gay men, then. We vastly prefer fucking on the first date, since it means we won’t be forced to sit through a second.”

Dean could see his point and sat on the recliner next to the couch. He couldn’t see the TV well, but it didn’t matter. “When’s the last time you got laid?”

Cas buried his face in the cushion for a moment and Dean watched his chest heave. “Oh, I don’t know. End of last semester, maybe? It’s been a couple of months, but not ridiculously long.”

“Too long for me. I’d probably get desperate and call Carmen. We all know how bad that would go.” He shuddered, not wanting to ever go back there.  _ Chick went psycho on me. _

He rolled onto his stomach and fixed his shorts over his crotch. “I’m not that desperate, certainly not desperate enough to hook up with a girl.”

“No? You sure? Some girls are down for butt stuff too.” He chuckled and dogged the well deserved pillow that flew at his head. “What? Just tryin’ to help. Girls always ask about you.”

That earned him a self-satisfied smirk. “That’s because I’m the total package, and I  _ have  _ an excellent  _ package.”  _ He huffed through his nose. “But it’s not really the asshole I’m attracted to, Dean. It’s what’s on the other side.” 

_ He has a point. _ “Just sayin’ if you wanna get your dick wet, I know a few chicks dyin’ to check out that package.” He shrugged, confused at why  _ he _ suddenly wanted to see Cas’ package. Had they really gone  _ this _ many years and never seen each other’s goods?

“I’ll take that under advisement.”

~~~~

"Goddamn, I hate summer." Dean wiped his forehead on his sleeve and tossed his gloves aside as he glanced up at the sky. "How do you walk around with all that hair under the friggin sun all day?"

Sam shrugged his shoulders and kept moving more beams closer. “More I sweat, the better I look.” He dropped them with a clatter and turned to face Dean. “That’s why I look better than you, I do all the heavy lifting.”

Dean laughed at that one. "Yeah, right. We all know I'm the pretty brother." He sat down for a much deserved break. "How are things with that Madison chick?"

“Great, actually. We’re talking about moving in together.” Sam came over and sat down next to him, handing him a water bottle. “What’s it like living with Cas?”

"Thanks." Dean took it and chugged half the bottle. "Great, actually. He's honestly the best roommate I've ever had... even though the other two people I've ever lived with are my crazy ex and... you. He's better than both of you combined." He nudged him with his elbow playfully.

Sam scoffed. “Yeah, whatever, Dean. You two sharing a bed yet, or are you still in denial?”

Dean choked on his water and had to hit his chest. "The hell does that mean? I'm not in denial about nothin'. My denial phase was seventeen to twenty-one, I'm good with who I am now."

“If you say so.” Sam got up and stretched, then grabbed his hammer from his toolbelt. “Tell him Madison’s brother wants to meet him, then, if you’re seriously not interested. I told her no because I figured you’d pull your head out of your giant ass at some point.”

"My ass is perfect, but I'm glad you think about it so often you tell your girlfriend about it." Dean stood with a groan. "I knew she was always secretly interested. I'm down if you are, but you gotta leave the room." Dean was pretty proud of himself for that deflection.  _ Head's not in my ass... about what? Cas is my best friend. _

Sam blinked at him. “You need therapy, Dean. Seriously. Just... tell Cas he’s interested, okay? Save the... rest of whatever the hell you just said for a rainy day.”

"Rainy day? I'll put it on my calendar." He winked and went back to work, absolutely not giving  _ that _ conversation another damn thought.

~~~~

When he got home that night, Cas was once again nose deep in his laptop with his nerdy glasses sliding down his face. "Hey there computer... worm. No wait..." Dean pointed a finger, "computer slug."

“That’s offensive to slugs everywhere, they lack the proper appendages to use a computer. Not to mention, the slime would likely destroy the hard drive within min-” Cas looked up abruptly, realizing he was rambling. “Ah, yes. Funny joke.”

"Ugh... your people skills are gettin' rusty again. When'd you say the semester starts?" Dean slipped off his boots and started stripping his dirty clothes off. He needed a shower but he was stalling so he could find an opening about Sam's stupid friend.

“Two weeks.” Cas’ eyes flicked toward him and lingered for a second, then went straight back to the laptop. “I’m sure my ‘people skills’,” air quotes and everything, “will be just fine when I start interacting with people other than you, Jask, and Ares.”

"Yeah, probably. Then you'll hang with those smart friends of yours." Dean rolled his eyes.  _ More like douchey friends.  _ "Uh, still wantin' to get laid?"  _ Eh, probably not the right way to ask... oh well. _

The corner of Cas’ mouth turned up, but he didn’t look over again. “I appreciate the offer, Dean, but I think we both know that isn’t a good idea.”

"No, not -”  _ Not me.  _ He tilted his head and kicked off his jeans. “Wait, why not?"  _ Don't look too closely, this is  _ **_not_ ** _ the time for that conversation. _ "Whatever, Sam's girlfriend's brother is interested if you are." Dean scooped up his clothes and jogged up the stairs.

He wasn't upset by Cas' comment, and the logical part of his brain said Cas was absolutely right to think that. But why did he get annoyed? After his shower, he came to the conclusion it had nothing to do with Cas and everything to do with the fact that he didn't take rejection well. He never had to. 

Dean threw on his basketball shorts and a tank top, and jogged back downstairs to find food.

“Is he hot?” Cas set his laptop down and scrambled off the couch, meeting Dean in the kitchen. “Scratch that, nevermind. Yes, tell him yes.”

"Eager, are we?" Dean started pulling things out of the fridge and paused. "Wanna just order Chinese? That place gets here fast, and I'm beat." He closed the fridge and fished out his phone. "And uh, he's alright. Not my type, so probably yours."

Cas looked a little put out, and crossed his arms. “Yes to the food. And... yes, I suppose I am a little eager. How soon do you think he’ll go out with me?”

"I'll call Sam after food." Dean called to order the food and walked over to the couch to finally relax. Once he hung up and let Cas know it would be there in twenty, he dialed Sam. "Sup, bitch."

“Hey, jerk. You talk to him?”

"Yup. He's interested, but three things. One, send a pic for him. Two, dude better put out. Don't be wasting my friend's time. And three, he hurts him, I'll kill him dead. Got it?" Dean glanced over at Cas and saw him watching him with a weird look upon his face.

Sam laughed. “I’ll just give him Cas’ number and they can work out the details, I’m not his pimp. You sure you’re okay with this, though?”

"Why wouldn-" He shifted in his seat and decided not to go there, especially with Cas right there. "Shut up and send the number, asshatt."

“Oh, this is gonna be a riot.” Sam laughed again and hung up, and not even a full minute later, Cas’ phone buzzed. 

He stared at it on the counter like it was going to explode. “I... guess this is the point where I actually have to talk to him, hm?”

"Yup." Dean tossed his phone on the table and watched Cas. "Don't mind me, I wanna watch." He grinned and spread his legs to get comfortable.  _ No way this guy is in Cas' league...  _

Cas picked the phone up and bit his lip, staring at the screen. “You’re right. He’s hot.”

"Lemme see." Dean reached out his hand for the phone. "Yeah he's alright. Kinda hipster-y right?"  _ Bet this dude wears a beanie in the summer. _

He snatched the phone back and started flipping through his photos. “It’s hard to tell from a single picture, but I like his eyes. And at this point, I don’t really care what he’s like.”

_ Yeah, but you would deny me... sup with that? Friends got each other off sometimes. _ Dean sat back with a sigh to wait for their food. "Well, hope it works out with the hipster and you get laid soon."  _ Maybe I'm just hangry... that's gotta be it. _

**Castiel**

It didn’t particularly matter what Matt was like, Cas desperately needed a boyfriend if he had any hope of passing his classes.  _ That sounds like the most ridiculous thing ever, but when you’re majoring in relationship psychology… guinea pigs are necessary.  _ “I appreciate the well-wishes, Dean, but it’s not really about getting laid.” 

He looked at the picture again and finally sent one of himself, then started a small-talk type of conversation with him. 

"No? I thought that was why you were so eager." Dean looked confused because of course Dean Winchester thought it was  _ always _ about getting laid.

Cas didn’t have the patience to explain it to him, particularly because he was already running out of things to say to Matt, and that wasn’t a good sign. “Quick, what’s the most interesting thing about me?”

"Your eyes and your hands. Unless you mean not physical, and in that case, your brain. You give a real shit about the things you give a shit about and can do anything you put your mind to. And if that isn't good enough... you gotta big vocabulary and cook better than most. Am I getting this right? Probably not, uh... you did that one hike up the mountain. Like actually paid money to hike up a mountain when we coulda just walked up for free. That's kinda interesting." Dean must have realized he was rambling and blushed slightly.

_ What in the fuck was that? _ Cas stared at him a little dumbfounded, and then looked down at his hands. “I think I’ll go with hands, most people either aren’t interested in my brain or become intimidated by it.”

"Yeah, but if you say your hands it will become about sex... trust me. Especially if he asks for a picture." The doorbell rang, and Dean hopped up to grab the food.

_ I do not have time to unpack what he meant by that.  _ Cas continued to text Matt through dinner, but the conversation was boring. _ I don’t think I should have to start the communication therapies before we even meet. _ He sighed, setting his phone down and adjusting his chopsticks. “I’m doomed.”

Dean huffed a laugh and bit into an egg roll. "What's wrong, can I read it?"

“Sure.” Cas slid him his phone with the thread open. “Be warned, though. It’s harder to get through than  _ The Silmarillion.” _

"I dunno what that means." Dean wiped his hands on a napkin and picked it up to read. Cas watched his eyes travel down the screen and narrowed his gaze at the smirk on Dean's lips.

When Dean huffed a laugh at the end, Cas grabbed the phone. “What’s so funny?”

"Nothin'." He took another bite and chuckled. "Told ya he was a hipster."

Cas groaned and popped a piece of orange chicken in his mouth. “Tell your brother I’m sorry.”

"Not even gonna try? Could probably get laid at least. Just be prepared for the tears he'll probably shed after he comes," Dean teased and laughed annoyingly hard at his joke.

Dean had a point, and maybe that was exactly what Cas needed. He shot off another text against his better judgement and decided to give it a fair shot. “If he cries, it just means I did my job.”

~~~~

Days passed, and Cas had all but given up on finding something to use for his final project.  _ It’s a good thing I have all year. Maybe I’ll find something once classes are actually in session and I know more… wait, what’s this? _

It was an ad he’d seen on social media a million times, but had never looked twice at.  _ Pathokinesis… isn’t that the power Cupid supposedly has to make people fall in love?  _

He clicked on the link and watched the promotional video. From what he could tell, it was some sort of scratch-off date book designed to break couples out of their normal, boring routines. Getting out of your comfort zone was absolutely a good way to encourage communication, especially given the circumstances the ‘About’ section detailed.  _ Shame I don’t have a damn boyfriend… this would be perfect. It’s not something officially employed by therapists and yet, likely would foster all of the things necessary for a healthy relationship.  _

The door opened to signal Dean’s return right as he was removing the book from his cart with a dejected expression. Dean kicked off his boots and tilted his head. "Aww, why the long face, Lucy? I'm home now," he teased and pulled off his shirt.

Cas unabashedly stared at Dean’s chest and regretted the fact that things didn’t work out with Matt. “I find myself in need of a boyfriend, and I don’t have one of those.”

“What happened to the last one? You forget to water him?” Dean bit back a laugh and started unbuckling his jeans. “You put food in his bowl everyday, right?”

Shifting, Cas scowled, but couldn’t seem to drag his eyes away. “I fed him more often than I feed you, and I don’t hear you complaining.”

"I can do that." Dean cleared his throat and did his own horrible rendition of a New Jersey accent. "I work all day and come home starvin' where's my dinner, woman? You spend all day burnin' a 'ole in me pocket... alright that kinda went Irish, but you get the idea. Order pizza, I gotta shower."

Cas couldn’t stop the laugh that built in his chest and closed the app on his phone. He stood up, making his way past Dean to the kitchen and cracking open the oven. The smell of lasagna wafted out and Cas shut it again to keep the heat in. “It’ll be ready by the time you get out.”

"Oh, I friggin' love you. Be right back." Dean darted up the stairs and left Cas alone to think about how much easier the project would be if he could find someone else like Dean. 

_ Well, Dean is Dean, but… Dean is… also  _ **_Dean,_ ** _ which makes that a terrible idea.  _ He chuckled quietly to himself and muttered, “And I’m the one in college.” 

True to his word, he had dinner dished up and on the table when Dean came back downstairs. Cas couldn’t shake the idea of the book he’d found, and started scrolling again to find it. “How was work today,  _ sweetheart?” _

“It was... hot,  _ darlin’,” _ Dean played along and took a bite, burning his mouth in the process. “Ah... balls!”

“You’re an idiot.” Cas gently blew on his before eating it and managed just fine. A few bites later, he finally found what he’d been looking for. He pulled up the webpage again and started going through reviews. 

“What are you lookin’ at? Can’t even have a nice dinner with my wife without that god-forsaken cellular device?” He brought back his accent and actually pulled it off that time.

Cas smiled in spite of himself and attempted an accent right back, this one reminiscent of Lucy herself. “You neglect me all day long, leave me holed up in here with nothin’ to do but sit around and look pretty.” He dropped the poor attempt and laughed at himself. “No, seriously? I think I found something to try for my final project, but... I’m not sure if it’s worth the money since I won’t be able to properly use it.”

“That was beautiful.” Dean smiled with a strange glint in his eyes. “What is it and why can’t you use it properly?”

Sighing, Cas sat back in his chair, lasagna forgotten. “I’d need a boyfriend to properly test it out. Or, in lieu of that, I’d need to test it on a struggling relationship. Jask and Ares couldn’t be happier if their lives depended on it, and the same can be said of Sam and Madison. Since things didn’t work out with Matt, I suppose I’ll just have to try and find someone once classes begin.”

“Nah. That wouldn’t work either. How could you start a relationship and instantly start workin’ on communication? You’d have to know how they communicate already and then work on that. Do it with me. We already have a relationship and a specific way of communicating. Does the homework say we have to be fuckin’? I’m gonna assume no. It should work.” Dean went back to eating and grabbed some more garlic bread.

Cas tried to come up with a valid argument to that, but couldn’t... except for one. “You should look this over first, because I truly have no idea what it entails.” He slid his phone over with the description up and waited as Dean looked over it.

Dean took his time reading it and slid it back. “Sounds fun. When do we start?”

_ He’s serious. _ “Dean, there are... there are things we’d have to consider. First of all, there are supposedly fifty dates in here. We’d have to do them all, by the end of the semester, which means this would be our lives for the rest of the  _ year. _ And there very well might be... intimacy involved. If we can’t do whatever it says, I won’t get a true feel for it. It’s probably not a good idea.”

“What else do we have goin’ on? I work, you school. We eat dinner every night and do dates all the time. What’s the real difference? We’ll do whatever it says, we’re adults.”

Hesitant but lacking another option, Cas agreed and ordered the book. “Okay, then. It’ll be here next week.”

~~~~

The following night, Dean had his third date with…  whatever her name was. He was gone late, which Cas took as a good sign for the girl, and a terrible sign for him.  _ If I have to fake date Dean, am I going to get fake jealous? Real jealous? This isn’t going to work.  _

He tossed and turned in his bed, unable to fall asleep due to the noises coming from Dean’s room after they came back.  _ He’s too promiscuous to go that long without sex, and if we won’t be having it with each other, he’ll be having it with other people. Am I capable of pretending it’s real for the purposes of the project, but remembering it’s fake for the purposes of our friendship? Maybe we just need ground rules. Yes, I’ll talk to Dean when the book arrives and we have more information about some ground rules.  _

The noises abruptly stopped, and Cas adjusted the bulge in his pajama pants. Friend or not, Dean sounded… incredible when he was having sex, there was no way around it. Cas was objective enough to admit that. 

When the door to his room opened, Cas sat bolt upright and listened hard as he slowly got out of bed and made his way over. When he got to the small walkway that housed the washer and dryer, he flipped on the light and found Dean standing completely naked and holding a towel. “Dean?”

He stood up straighter, not bothering to cover up in the slightest. “Sorry did I wake ya? I didn’t have a towel and need a shower.” Dean must have seen where Cas’ eyes were because they were glued to Dean’s heavy, spent cock. The damned thing was still shiny with…  _ someone’s  _ juices, and Cas felt a pang of  _ something  _ when he realized that was either lube from a condom, Dean’s own come, or  _ hers.  _

Fighting a weird, no doubt exhaustion-induced urge to touch him, Cas pulled his eyes back up to Dean’s face and cleared his throat. “Right, then. Congratulations, I guess the third time was the charm?”

“Yup. This is actually an optical illusion.” Dean back peddled and bit his lip. “Don’t act like you're not impressed.” He spun around and walked toward his room. Horrible time for a Ron Burgundy quote, but Cas truly  _ was _ impressed. 

_ Real. It’ll be real jealousy, whether we fake date, real date, or never date at all. Damnit.  _


	3. Two Minutes to Midnight

**Dean**

As it turned out, chicks didn’t like it when you called it off after the first hookup. Dean wasn’t trying to be an asshole, but he felt like real dating someone  _ and  _ fake dating Cas would be way more work than he was capable of handling. Not to mention, no chick would believe he and Cas were fake dating. How do you even explain that?  _ Hey, I have a fake date with my roommate comin’ up, raincheck?  _

He tried explaining the situation, and Jo was friggin pissed. She didn’t believe the damn school project for a second, especially because she knew the semester hadn’t started yet, and after some profanity-sprinkled insults - she told him to lose her number. 

Dean felt bad, but if he had to choose, he’d still choose Cas’ damn project because it was  _ for  _ Cas. He’d do anything for him, especially something this simple. The guy was gonna go bald if Dean didn’t help with his schooling in some way, and normally, there was no way  _ to _ help.  _ This _ he could do.

But what the hell was this date book? 

Curiosity eventually won, and Dean pulled up his browser.  _ The fuck was it called? Telekinesis…. no this isn’t a damn superhero movie. Somethin’ with Cupid?  _ It took a bit, but he eventually found the same one Cas had shown him at the dinner table.  _ Alright… let’s see… _

He read the description and then some reviews, and everyone seemed to have positive shit to say.  _ “You don't know what you're doing until you scratch it off!” That sounds fun. “No Take Backs.” Alright then, you scratch it you do it… sounds fair. “Don't forget to take a picture and journal your experience!” Stop tellin’ me what to do, book.  _ Dean rolled his eyes.  _ Maybe we should YouTube it and become internet famous? _ He closed out the app and set his phone aside to go back to his video game.

It was rare he had a Sunday alone without Cas around, but he’d gone to visit his dad, so Dean decided it was a good time to bust out the dusty Xbox. 

By the time Cas came home, he had completely forgotten to start dinner and felt badly about it. Cas looked exhausted and hungry. “How’s Jagger?”

“Better today.” Cas plopped down on the recliner, running a hand through his messy hair. “Want to go get dinner?”

“Yeah. Been on the couch all day. Let’s go on a date and talk about dating. I have a couple questions, and need food before we go there.” 

“In sweatpants?” Cas teased, and Dean looked down, huffing a laugh.

“We all know I’d still be the best lookin’ one there, but no. I’ll get dressed,  _ dear.”  _ He stood up and walked towards the stairs. “I’ll be down in ten.” 

It took more like fifteen minutes, but they finally made their way to Baby after picking a nearby Italian restaurant. Dean opened Cas’ door to be cheesy. “Madam,” he waved him inside, and Cas tucked his legs before Dean shut the door.

The first thing Dean noticed when he got into the car himself was that this shit felt normal. Going to dinner with Cas, treating him like his wife… that was a normal Tuesday for them.  _ Maybe this shit won’t be so bad, it ain’t even like we gotta act.  _

“So, how was your day? Did you finally get past the level you’ve been stuck on for a month?” Cas’ eyes were warm as he looked over, and Dean had to remind himself to look back at the road.

_ Those eyes are too damn blue.  _ “Yeah, that boss bitch didn’t stand a chance. See what I accomplish when you’re not around distractin’ me?” 

Cas barked a laugh and leaned forward to dig through his cassette tapes. “I’m in the mood for Boston. Is there any rhyme or reason to this clusterfuck?”

“Yeah, they’re in order of awesomeness. You’ll find Boston’s debut sandwiched between  _ ‘Zepp I’ _ and  _ ‘Pronounced Leh-Nerd Skin-Nerd’.” _ Dean grinned cheekily as Cas plucked the tape from the box and slid it in. “Nice choice, by the way.”

They pulled into the restaurant at the end of side one, and they were both laughing from the ridiculous car concert they’d put on. Cas managed to open his own door that time, but Dean caught the door to the restaurant before he got there and swung it wide. 

He gestured for Cas to go first and bowed his head mockingly. “After you, Princess.”

“We both know  _ you’re _ the only princess around here.” Cas pretended to flip his hair as he passed him and laughed at the expression on the hot hostess’ face as she seated them. He took his time looking over the menu and when he finally picked something, he set it down and pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. “I need to get these refitted.” 

Dean huffed a laugh and ordered them drinks. “I think it’s cute when they slide down your face. Does this place have bread? Starvin’.” He rubbed his belly and caught the hostess looking their way. “Chick is hot. Do you ever think chicks are hot?”

Cas regarded her for a moment and nodded. “She’s beautiful. I just... have no desire to do anything about that fact. I’m not blind, Dean.”

“I have plenty of desires...” Dean winked at her and she turned away with a blush. “So I googled that book. Patho... kinesis? The Cupid thing? Do you know if sex is involved? It says ‘you scratch it, you do it’ so I’m just curious if it’s like an adult book or if I’m confusing reality with porn again.”

“I don’t know, Dean. I don’t think we’ll know for sure until we actually scratch them off. I’m assuming that will be a line we don’t cross, and... we’ll simply have to figure something else out.” Cas stared at his glass, looking like he was deep in thought.

Dean softly tapped the table next to Cas’ glass, his attention now fully on his best friend. “Talk to me.”

Cas looked up with an unreadable expression. “I can’t ask you to do this, Dean. I don’t think it will work if you’re sleeping with other people, and...” he glanced at the hostess and then back at Dean, “can you even go that long without sex?”

“Yeah. I’ve went periods without sex just fine, Cas. I wasn’t planin’ on fucking anyone else once we start. I already broke things off with Jo... she wasn’t happy. But I made a choice... this.” He waved a finger between them. “I’m all yours this semester.”

Some of the tension in Cas’ shoulders eased. “We both know I can go that long.” He sat back and sipped his drink slowly through the straw, then set the cup down. “Maybe I should play wingman for you, hm? Help you get your rocks off one more time?”

“Hell, maybe I should play wingman for you too.” His eyes glanced back towards where the hostess was, but she wasn’t there anymore. “Both get one last lay before we’re jackin’ off the rest of the year.”

A soft laugh escaped his best friend. “Maybe. But I doubt I’ll find anyone here. I’ll probably just call Michael.”

“Ugh, that asshat. Look at that waiter over there, givin’ off major bottom vibes, sweetheart. Bet I can get his number for you.” Dean bit his lip, a playful glint in his eyes.

Cas smirked just slightly and flicked his eyes up and down the guy’s body. “Being a switch definitely has its perks. And now  _ I’m  _ the one with the desires.” He leaned forward, locking eyes with Dean. “You’re on.”

Dean stood up and strolled over confidently. “Hey there... Zeke? That short for somethin’?” 

“Ezekiel.” The waiter blushed under Dean’s gaze. 

“Quick question, what d’you think of my friend over there?” They looked over at Cas who pointedly looked down at his drink. “Aw, he’s a lil shy.”

Zeke sighed quietly and looked back at Dean. “He’s hot, but... doesn’t seem to be very confident. I like my tops aggressive. I find quickies don’t work as well when both parties are too shy to make a move.”

“Oh trust me... he is confident in bed. I haven’t had the pleasure, but... thin walls.” He chuckled. “Trust me, won’t get a better lay than that.”

That seemed to do the trick, and Zeke nodded. “Fine. My break is in twenty minutes. We have an employee bathroom with a door that locks.” 

He looked over to see Cas talking to the hostess with a damn twinkle in his eye. She glanced toward him and Zeke as she handed Cas a piece of paper, then winked at Dean and walked away.

Dean walked back to sit down with a grin. There was something going on in his chest, but he figured it was just the excitement of the situation... definitely  _ not _ jealousy... nope. There wasn’t anything to be jealous of, if everything went right, they’d both be getting off before they went home.

“Here.” Cas slid the paper toward him. “She gets off at 9, and she’s quite interested in your…  _ package.”  _

“Oh yeah? Well you’re gonna meet Zeke over there in the back bathroom in twenty.” Dean grinned and nodded towards the man.

Cas raised a single eyebrow as he smirked at Zeke, and Dean was damn proud of himself.  _ Told ya, Zeke. _ Cas drained the rest of his drink and their actual waitress came over to refill it. “Well, I suppose we’re both getting what we wanted, then. We  _ do _ make a damn good team.”

“We do. And here.” Dean pulled out his wallet and handed him a condom. “Somethin’ tells me you don’t have one. I have a few.”

He took it, but shook his head slightly. “I actually do have a couple, but I don’t know how old they are. I doubt we’ll be getting to the… main event or anything, but it never hurts to use one for a blow job, especially with a stranger. Is it flavored? I hate the taste of latex.” 

“No, it isn’t flavored  _ Princess.” _ Dean smiled to himself and was happy the food finally arrived. He made a mental note to get Cas flavored condoms for his birthday next month, and then wondered if they would be having a birthday date. Would that be a free pass day so Cas could get laid? Everyone deserved to get laid on their birthday.  _ Maybe we could... shit, why am I thinkin’ like this? _

**Castiel**

The first day of classes were as nerve-wracking as Cas had remembered them to be, even though he was already well-prepared for what he’d be told. He’d studied those syllabuses enough times that he was quoting from memory right along his professors as they reviewed them.

One nice thing about getting back to school was he could see his friend Charlie again. They only had one overlapping class since her major was different, but they would have a free period together three days a week, which was nice. 

They chose to get lunch together and ended up in the university’s small food court. After getting their meals, they sat down at a table in the corner and Cas picked at his fries as he studied the room. “How was your summer?”

“It was... eventful.” She grinned. “How was yours? Dean still driving you crazy?”

“Yes, but that will never change. And, I have to give him props… he signed on to help me in a way I never expected him to.”

“How?” She asked snatching a fry. “Are you doing a study on how much food one can consume?”

Cas chuckled and swallowed. “Maybe, but... not specifically. He’s going to pretend to be my boyfriend for one of my relationship psych classes.”

Her eyes widened and she stopped mid bite, then chewed slowly as she processed. “Okay... what exactly does that entail? Is this a good idea? You guys seem to... work.”

“Honestly? We have no idea what it’s going to entail, the book we’re using won’t arrive until sometime today.” He briefly ran her through the details that he did know. “So, honestly, it may not work. I’m just impressed he’s willing to try for my sake.”

“I’m not surprised. You’re his favorite person ever, of course he would help.” She shrugged and grabbed another. “Wait, didn’t you see his peen? What was it like?”

Cas narrowed his eyes and clicked his tongue, but was honestly grateful he had a chance to gush about it. “Do you know how most statues have those tiny, barely-there penises? And your first thought when seeing them is that the rest of the statue is immaculate and gorgeous and perfect, so why isn’t the best part?”

“Yes! Oh my glob, it’s small?!” she practically yelled, and then whispered, “sorry”.

Sighing, Cas shook his head. “No. He has the penis that  _ should _ be on those statues.”

“Oh.” Her eyes widened as she thought about that. “Oh! Nice. Way to go, Dean. Not surprised, he was hand crafted and it isn’t even fair to be  _ that  _ pretty.”

_ No, it isn’t.  _ Cas munched on another fry. “Even I can admit that. Anyway, we’re probably going to be starting this trainwreck in the next couple of days, so that should be interesting.”

“I’ll expect a full report on this experiment every chance you can get.” Charlie pointed at him with a fry.

“Noted. Now, tell me about these…  _ events.” _

~~~~

When he got home from his last class of the day, the book had arrived. He briefly considered waiting for Dean to even open it, but curiosity was eating him alive and he knew he wouldn’t last that long. 

Wanting to butter Dean up, Cas paused long enough to throw together an apple pie and get it in the oven.  _ Okay. Now, even if the contents of that book are ridiculous, he can’t be mad at me. He loves my pies.  _

He tore open the packaging and pulled it out, surprised to see it was actually rather high quality. Hardcover with thick, sturdy pages, each one held four dates covered by silver UV ink, like on a lottery ticket.  _ Shit, that means I can’t peek without him knowing. Would he even care? This is probably nothing to him, just an excuse to hang out with and help his best friend. Of course, all it is to me is a project and the excuse to hang out with my best friend, but… still. Shit, okay. I’ll wait.  _

Knowing Dean would be home soon, he started some chicken for dinner. By the time he got the mashed potatoes mixed and the cornbread ready to go, Dean was walking through the door. 

Cas turned, biting his lip at how good Dean looked all filthy like that.  _ Okay, stop. You’re only thinking that because it’s been brought to your attention so many times lately. Knock it off.  _ “Shower fast, dinner‘s ready.”

“Yes, sir.” He blew a mock kiss and took off up the stairs. 

Dinner was done and on the table when he returned and his hair was still damp and tousled. “Mmm, dinner.” He sniffed the air and his head swiveled towards the oven so fast it gave Cas whiplash. “Pie!”

“Yes, Dean. Your wife made you pie, but you can’t have it until you eat your dinner. How can you have any pudding if you don’t eat your meat?” Cas grinned widely when Dean recognized the Pink Floyd reference, then pointed to his food. “I’m serious. Eat.”

“You know I like it when you get all bossy.” Dean started eating and nodded at the book. “That it?”

_ Funny, I like it when  _ **_you_ ** _ get bossy. _ Cas nodded, eating as well. “Yes, and I opened it, but didn’t look too closely at it. I figured I’d wait for you.”

“Cool.” Dean stood and went to the chair right next to Cas and scooted in closer. “Let’s see it.” He genuinely looked excited, which only made Cas nervous for some reason. 

He pushed his plate away and pulled the book closer, angling his body toward Dean so they could see it easier. “Okay, so, each one of the dates is coded. It’ll tell us how expensive we can expect it to be, how long it should take, what time a day is best... and some sort of hint as to what it entails. But, we won’t know exactly what it is until we scratch it off.”

“Alright, straight forward enough. What if one has sexy time?” Dean wiggled his eyebrows and continued eating.

Cas looked back at the pages and the individual codes. “Well, none of these suggest that the dates will entail sex, but… it  _ is  _ a book for couples, so we have to be prepared for the possibility. My hope is that the creators of this would’ve assumed the dates themselves would lead actual couples to sex all on their own, and therefore it’s not an actual part of the date requirement. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah it does. What about a kiss? Cause rules are rules, Cas.”

The way Dean said that made Cas pause. “I… I suppose we need to figure out where the line is, then. It’s possible these  _ will  _ specify something simple like that, or, the dates could be purely situational.” His heart kicked up a notch for reasons he didn’t understand, and didn’t care to understand. “Would you be willing to kiss me?”

Dean’s eyes darted down to Cas’ lips and then he licked his own. “Yeah, why not? Unless you didn’t want to.”

“We can. It would just be for... the project’s sake, of course.”  _ Shit. Shit, shit. _ Cas leaned in a little closer without realizing it. “For research.”

Dean studied Cas’ face a moment and then he stood up to take his empty plate to the sink. “All sounds good with me.” He sniffed the cooling pie and pointed at it. “Want some?”

It took Cas’ brain a second to catch up and he nodded once.  _ That was weird. _ “Sure. But while we’re talking about ground rules, we should keep going. Holding hands, that sort of thing. Where are your lines?”

“I love hand holding. Uh... no hookin’ up with others or flirting while on dates? Seems rude.”

_ Curious, I was asking about his lines with me, and he chose to talk about his line with others.  _ “Agreed.” Cas took a breath and tried to approach things as clinically and professionally as he could. “Touching above or below the waist?”

“Cas.” Dean walked back over and set their slices of pie down. “Never mind. Yeah, probably should keep it above the waist. Seger doesn’t like bein’ woken up for nothin’.” He grinned and took a bite of pie, releasing a moan. “So good. Thank you.”

“The fact that you named your penis after one of the greatest rock writers of all time is borderline offensive.” Cas smiled and pulled his plate closer. “But deal, above the waist only. That removes just about everything between kissing and sex, and we’ll only end up kissing if the project directly calls for it. Everything else is fair game, but we won’t flirt with or sleep with anyone else for the duration.” He nodded to the book and took a bite of his pie. “If anything else unexpected comes up, we’ll deal with it at the time. Sound good?”

“Yep...” Dean flipped it randomly and pointed at one with a grin. “Scratch that one, let’s see what they look like.”

Though he appreciated Dean’s enthusiasm, he wasn’t quite sure they were ready to start. “We can’t scratch it off until we’re ready to actually do it. Be patient, Dean. You can fake date me soon enough. Should we start this weekend?”

“Yeah... I’m ready right now.” He shrugged and went back to his dinner. “We can try one that says stay home and start tomorrow if you wanted. Aren’t you onna time crunch?”

Suddenly, Cas wasn’t as eager for this as he thought he was going to be.  _ It’s just psychology. It’s not real, and no matter what happens, Dean and I will survive this.  _ He nodded, closing the book and leaning back. “Okay, Dean. We start tomorrow.”


	4. Changing Channels

**Dean**

Dean’s confidence tanked the moment he climbed into Baby after work.  _ Shit... what are we doin’? _ He told Sam about it and he did what he always did... he lectured. But Sam just didn’t understand their friendship, and that was fine. Most couldn’t. 

What he and Cas had was rare... would this mess with that at all? He hoped not. Before he drove home, he sent Cas a text. 

**Dean:** **_Need anything from the store or will we know after we scratch it?_ **

**Castiel:** **_no idea yet_ **

Dean was happy not to have to stop at the store all dirty. If they needed to head there after his shower, they could do it no problem. It would probably be more fun together, anyway. 

He drove home and walked in the house with faux confidence and called out. “Honey, I’m home! Where’s my hot date?”

Cas came down the stairs in jeans and a tight T-shirt. “Honestly, I can get used to you greeting me like that. It’s better than ‘where’s my dinner, woman?’.” He laughed, grabbing the book off the table. “Do you want to scratch it off now, and I can get things ready while you shower? Or do you want to wait?”

Dean was grinning while he talked and then shrugged. “Nah, wait for me. Wanna do it all together.” He ran up the stairs to shower and rub one out. He decided to put on jeans instead of hot dog pants and then ran back down. “Let’s do this.” He rubbed his hands together eagerly.

“Okay. Here, flip to a page, and I’ll pick the specific one.” Cas leaned over his shoulder as he chose a page, then closed his eyes and slammed his finger down on one of them. “That one.” He bent over to look at the details. “Okay, five to ten dollars, can be done at home, nighttime is best. That cookie signifies snacks, so you should be happy. But it does say we’ll need supplies.”

“Alright, let’s scratch ‘er off and do this thang.” Dean pulled out a quarter and held it out. “Wanna scratch it together?”

Cas licked his lip slowly and then nodded. “Sure. Together.” He fit his hand over Dean’s and they scratched it off, leaning in close to read it. A couple of seconds later, Cas muttered, “Oh, shit.”

“Fort! Cas... this book is awesome! And it’s kinda like building furniture together, but funner.” Dean did a geeky dance and pulled out his keys. “Store for s’mores?”

“And apparently, canned methanol gel. Although, we could just use our actual fireplace instead.” Cas walked toward the door and put on his shoes, chuckling to himself. “Forts, s’mores, and a romance movie? Something tells me this book isn’t going to be what we think it is.”

“Maybe not. Dunno about that movie thing though... Die Hard is romantic enough.” Dean chuckled and turned on the car.

The trip to the store was quick, though they argued about which kind of chocolate was better for s’mores - Hershey, or Dove. In the end, they bought both and decided to fight it out the old fashioned way. 

When they got back, Cas surveyed the living room. “We probably won’t be very comfortable in jeans, should we change?”

“Yeah, let’s get comfy then I’ll get the fireplace goin’.” They rushed up the stairs, bumping each other playfully and then came back down in pajama pants. 

Dean started on the fire while Cas googled romance movies. “What’s on the list?”

Grimacing, Cas read them off. “ _ Titanic, Dear John... the Notebook. P.S. I Love You, Gone With the Wind, Pretty Woman, When Harry Met Sally, The Fault In Our Stars, Casablanca, _ and... _ Stuck In Love.” _

“Shit.”  _ Chick flicks. _ “Uh... that  _ P.S. I Love You _ one has Gerard Butler  _ and _ Jeffrey Dean Morgan in it, huh? That one. At least the dudes are hot.”

“You’re not allowed to say that, JDM looks almost exactly like your father. It’s weird.” Cas started gathering blankets and pillows, and moved the coffee table so they’d be able to build a fort. “But fine, it’s the only one of those I actually own, anyway.”

“Ugh... thank’s for ruinin’ that. I’ll never see anything else now.” Dean shuddered and stood up to go help with the blankets.

Cas smiled cheekily and helped him build. “I’m not sorry. You can have Butler, though. We’ll share.” They finished the fort, which actually looked pretty damn cozy. The fire was going and Cas queued up the movie. “S’mores now? Or should we wait until we need a food distraction so we don’t cry?”

“I’m not gonna cry, you’re gonna cry... But yeah, let’s just set it out until we need the distraction to be safe.”  _ Shit... I’m definitely gonna cry. _

They set everything out next to the fire and then climbed in. The fort had looked a lot bigger from the outside, but once they were in, it was a damn tight squeeze. They managed to find a position where they weren’t touching, both laying on their stomachs with their heads poking out to see the tv. “Alright,” Cas said. “Let’s do this… Date number one.”

“Date number one... easy peasy.” Dean bumped him with his tongue between his lips and then turned toward the tv.

‘Easy peasy’ couldn’t have been further from the truth. The second she opened her first letter, Dean was already making s’mores. “Somethin’ in both my eyes.”

Cas huffed a laugh but didn’t look much better off. He came out of the fort to help Dean and they sat in front of the fire roasting their marshmallows, the movie still playing in the background. “Do you ever think you’ll love somebody like that?”

“Shit... I dunno. I don’t know if I want to. Can you imagine losing them? In that situation does the whole ‘better to have loved’ really apply anymore?”

He was silent for a moment, staring at the darkening marshmallow. “I don’t know, honestly. I’d like to think it does. You never know what could happen on any given day, so to stop yourself from loving someone just because you’re afraid you might lose them seems… counterproductive.”

_ Why did that make sense? _ “I see that. Hey, maybe one day we’ll both have it and talk about what an idiot I was for thinkin’ I was better off.” Dean grabbed the graham crackers and chocolate and helped Cas make his first one. “Here, darlin’.”

Cas smiled softly and took it, taking a bite. His eyes fluttered closed slowly as the melted chocolate coated his lips. “This was worth it. Why’d it take a book for us to do this?”

“No clue.” Dean used the pad of his thumb and wiped Cas’ lip, then sucked it into his mouth without a second thought. “Even after the book, we should make this a tradition.”

He nodded, staring down at Dean’s hand. “Right. Or, whichever one of us ends up with a significant other next can use the date book. My guess is that this is going to be extremely effective for a real couple. I’m already surprised by how...” Cas looked around at the fort and the fire, “intimate it is.”

“Me too, actually. It feels different, and it’s just snacks and a movie. We’ve done this a million times but never like this.”  _ Why are you talking? Stop talking. _ He shoved some s’more in his mouth to occupy it.

Cas finished his off and then shimmied back under the fort. “Then come on. It’s just getting to the good parts. Gods, I love Hilary Swank.”

“Comin’.” Dean waked back and climbed inside, and this time their bodies were pressed together.

It was damn warm under there, but in the good way. Comfortable, almost, despite the stupidly hard floor they were laying on. At one point, Cas rolled over onto his back and tilted his head to watch upside down. “Everything is less emotional this way.”

Dean glanced over and chuckled. “I don’t believe you, but you’re adorable.”  _ You’re talkin’ again, Dean. What did we say about this? _

“It’s science, Dean. Who’s the smart one, here?” He grinned, flattening out for a moment and watching Dean instead of the screen. “Sorry, I can’t handle the last letter. So I’m going to look at you, instead. Get over it.”

“Fine.” Dean forced his gaze on the screen with a blush. He felt... exposed, in a way. The damned movie had him feeling  _ things,  _ and it was nearly impossible to keep a straight face. But he had to, Cas was watching. He managed to stay as straight faced as he could, but stopping the single tear was impossible. So, he let it fall, then met Cas’ eyes.

“Hm,” Cas hummed. “The great Dean Winchester, macho man and self-proclaimed Batman has a heart after all.”

“Don’t tell a soul!” Dean wiped his tear and climbed out of the fort to stuff his face some more. He couldn’t pinpoint the emotions he was feeling... but they were heavy.

Cas waited a moment and then followed him out as the credits rolled. “Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me.” He made another s’more and leaned against the fireplace. “So… Hershey, or Dove?”

“I just put both and it was kinda awesome.” He hit his chest and coughed. “I need some milk now, though.”

Nodding, Cas headed for the kitchen and came back with two glasses. “Here.” They drank, then Cas sucked in a breath. “Okay, so that’s the first date. Not bad. I’ll need to start some sort of a journal to keep track of how things went, do you have anything to want me to add?”

“Uh... I would say it was definitely a success, and we kinda opened up a little, so it did its job. Oh, and we gotta take a picture right?”  _ Success... definitely a success... right? _

After searching for his phone for a moment, Cas got back into the fort and signaled for Dean to join him. They both grinned at the phone camera. Cas snapped a picture, and then showed him. They looked like an honest to god couple, surrounded by blankets with stupid, cheesy smiles on their faces. “Yes, Dean. I’d say it was a success.”

**Castiel**

Cas once again sat with Charlie in the food court, this time pointedly avoiding her gaze. He could tell she was chomping at the bit to ask about his date with Dean, but he wasn’t remotely ready to talk about it.  _ Or think about it, or have another one, or anything.  _ “How are your classes so far?”

“Nice stalling. Surprised you aren’t buffering the table. How was your ‘date’ with Dean?” She leaned in closer. “Did you guys...” Her eyes went wide.

He kept his face as neutral as possible. “No, we didn’t. We made some s’mores and watched a movie in a blanket fort. Nothing happened, because we’re  _ friends.” _

“That’s actually beyond adorable. Did he pick some slasher film again, though?” Charlie went back to her sandwich.

Cas smiled in spite of himself. “No, the book said we had to pick a romance. We watched  _ P.S. I Love You.” _ He took a bite and looked down at his tray.  _ And he cried, but I respect him enough not to tell a soul. _

“Ugh, that movie is so sad! I ball every time, literal tears. Were you able to hold it together with Mr. Macho?”

“We both did just fine, thank you.” Cas set his burger down and eyed Charlie. “Honestly, it was the best date I’ve ever been on. And we still have forty-nine more.”

“Best ever? Wow... do you think it’s because there was no pressure for more? Or was it just... Dean?” She had a knowing look, but Cas chose to ignore it.

After considering that for a moment, Cas was actually a little surprised by the truth. “Both. It was easy because I knew nothing would happen, and it was easy because it was Dean and I didn’t have to be anyone but myself. He already knows me.” He shrugged, not thinking much of it. “We’ll see how the rest of them go.”

“Am I going to have to pry those out of ya, too?” She teased and tossed a chip at him.

He caught it with a grin. “If they go as well as the first one did? Yeah. You will.”

~~~~

Cas watched Dean devour the last of his dinner with a fond expression. “You really are an animal, you know that? Like a raccoon.”

“Racoons are cute. I’ll take that as a compliment.” He sat back with a groan. “When’s our next date? Friday?”

He laughed quietly. “Dean… it  _ is  _ Friday. Are you feeling okay? Should we reschedule?”

“Oh, thank god. I’m just exhausted from work. Let’s scratch this baby off!”

Cas grabbed the book and flipped it open. “Pick a page... six through thirty.”

“Oh shit uh… twenty-four.” Dean got up to hover over his shoulder.

Looking at the two options on that page, only one fit. “Okay, since it looks like one of these involves physical exertion, let’s go with this bottom one. Besides, it’s called ‘Balls’. It has to be good, right?” He fished a coin out of his pocket and positioned himself. “Together?”

“Together.” They started scratching and Dean chuckled. “Balls...” he repeated.

“It’s an acronym. ‘B’... bad lip read the first five minutes of your least favorite movie. ‘A’, attempt to do it again with marshmallows in your mouth. ‘L’ livestream it to social media. ‘L’ look up other bad lip reading videos on YouTube. ‘S’, sit back with drinks, popcorn and watch the videos.” Cas paused, embarrassment already creeping up his spine. “Balls.”

“Ah, fuck! You’re pickin’ the damn page next time.” Dean laughed. “What movie are we doin’? Cause we’re doin’ it!”

Cas scrambled in his mind for a suitable movie and realized he truly didn’t watch many cheesy movies. “Twilight, 50 shades, and anything with Katherine Heigl.” He huffed, tucking the book back in its rightful spot. “It’s a good thing we have marshmallows left.”

“Uh... Twilight might be fun. Dibs on vamp dude.” Dean smiled. “You’re the chick.” He clicked his tongue and winked.

He rolled his eyes and lightly smacked Dean’s shoulder. “We have to livestream this. That’s ridiculous.” Cas scowled at the book and went to retrieve the marshmallows, then came back and sat on the couch. “Should we practice, or just… go for it?”

“Nah, let’s just go for it, it’s uh... more authentic right?” Dean ate a marshmallow and laughed. “Man... how many friends you got on Facebook?”

For once, a lack of popularity was going to work in his favor. “Maybe a hundred? How many do you have? Maybe we should just stream it on mine.”

“Yeah, probably. I don’t ever go on it, but I have a lot. We’ll do yours. Think your Auntie Amara will watch?” Dean used to tease Cas about his hot aunt, but he stopped after high school.

Dread filled him. “Gods, I hope not. Okay, let’s just do it.” Cas pulled up the movie and fast-forwarded until he got to a scene with Bella and Edward, then looked at Dean. “Get over here.” He set his phone down with the kickstand out and started the stream. 

Dean waved awkwardly at the phone and then cleared his throat. “This is weird. Alright, so uh, we’re gonna bad lip read this Bella and Edwardo scene because a book told us to. Press play, Bella.”

Cas pressed play and panicked when he saw she spoke first. The video was muted, and he scrambled to figure out what the hell she was trying to say. “Uh… how's your cat?”  _ What?  _

Dean chuckled and bit back his laugh. “Which one?”

“What?”

“Let me uh... get a piece of that pussy.” Dean’s eyes widened when he realized what he said and then he busted up laughing.

Cas gasped and tackled Dean right into the ground, trying to pin him. “My... aunt... is... watching!”

“Oh shit.” Dean easily flipped them and used his body weight to hold Cas down, still laughing his ass off. “I was just bein’ committed to the cause, Cas. Vampire guy’s the one with the dirty mouth.”

The fight went out of him quickly, Dean was a lot stronger than him and he didn’t particularly mind being pinned. “You’re... a child.” 

Dean responded by grabbing a marshmallow and popping it into Cas’ mouth. “But you love it.” Dean stood up and threw some marshmallows into his mouth. “C’mon, sweetheart. Stand up,” he mumbled, and held out a hand to help him up.

Once back on his feet, Cas shoved a few into his own mouth and they rewound enough to try it again. 

They got through a few lines without anything inappropriate, and then the horrible actors kissed.  _ Why did I pick this scene?! _

Dean lip read, “It’s the booze,” in a muffled voice, then leaned in so close Cas thought they would actually kiss. But, he maneuvered so the camera couldn’t tell they weren’t actually kissing and when Bella practically jumped on Edward, Cas had no idea what he was supposed to do. Dean decided to keep going; he lifted Cas off his feet and laid him back on the couch, reaching around to grab more marshmallows as they struggled to swallow what was in their mouths. “Think that was convincing?”

Considering Cas had nearly choked on his, he nodded. “Yes. Now… turn the damn feed off.” 

“Okay.” Dean got up and walked over to turn it off. “So uh... yeah. Date number two. I still had fun.”

Cas let out a breath now that he had some distance from Dean. “It’s not over yet. We’re supposed to get popcorn and drinks, and sit together watching videos of bad lip reading. But that part will be easy.”

“That sounds awesome. Whiskey? I’ll start the popcorn while you check that thread and see if anyone actually watched.”

_ Gods, I hope not. _ ”Sounds good.” Cas almost deleted the video but decided against it, because he absolutely wanted to watch it back later. He took a screenshot of the moment Dean said ‘pussy’ as their photo for the date and smiled to himself. “We had twenty four views. Nothing crazy, and my aunt wasn’t one of them.”

“Good. Was Charlie watching?” Dean slid over a glass and took the popcorn out of the microwave. His phone chimed in his pocket and he pulled it out. “Jask and Ares watched.” Dean started typing something and giggling.

_ Shit.  _ “Yes, she watched, and I’m suddenly grateful I don’t have to deal with her for a few days.” Cas sighed, then queued up a YouTube video of bad lip readings. He grabbed a handful of popcorn once Dean sat down and tried to peek at Dean’s phone. “What did he say?”

Dean showed him the phone, his eyes watching Cas' expression. 

**Jask:** **_You aren't fooling anyone, Winchester. Give that boy a real kiss._ **

Right under was Dean's response. 

**Dean:** **_Don't worry about us, Loreal. If ima kiss Cas, it won't be on no dumbass livestream_ **

He swallowed at the thought and looked up to meet Dean’s eyes. “So far, it doesn’t seem like we’ll have to worry about the book telling us to kiss, but… it’s still early.”  _ And if that almost-fake kiss was anything to go by, I actually hope I’m wrong.  _

"Well we'll cross that bridge when we come to it, but if it does, I'd rather it wasn't on Facebook. You're my best friend, that moment should just be... ours. I dunno, ignore me." Dean blushed and ate some popcorn.

_ Dean Winchester, do you actually  _ **_want_ ** _ to kiss me?  _ Cas didn’t have the balls to ask out loud, and he absolutely wasn’t ready for the answer anyway. Dean was his best friend, nothing more, and he didn’t want to blur that line. “I don’t think that’s unreasonable.” 

Dean started paying attention to the screen, and soon they were both laughing at how stupid these videos were. "See, I think we did well. Vampire dude really was askin' for that  _ meow... _ if you know what I mean."

“That movie is awful and I can’t believe we had to sit through any of it at all.” Cas stole the rest of the popcorn and started thinking about what he’d write down for that one. “Anything to add for the project?”

"Uh yeah... not a new tradition, but was fun still... everything with you is fun though, so... maybe that's why." Dean shot back his drink and set the glass down. "I didn't cross any lines, right?"

Cas shook his head, reaching over to gently squeeze Dean’s kneecap reassuringly. “None whatsoever, and you’re right… that ended up being more fun than I thought it would. Are you ready for another one tomorrow, or should we take a break for a couple of days?”

"Hell no, were doin' another one tomorrow, I'm excited. Can we scratch it off now?"

That actually sounded tempting. “We can, but since we’re scratching early, we’ll have to choose one of the ones that involves advanced planning. Is that okay?”

"Yeah." Dean sat up eagerly. "This shit is fun. I'm glad we're doin' this, Cas."

Cas grabbed the book and flipped it open. “I’m glad, too. Let’s see if we still feel this way after learning what it is.” He laughed a little uncomfortably, knowing now that just about  _ anything  _ could be behind that UV ink. “Okay, here’s one with the little planning symbol. I’ll scratch it.” 

It was harder than the last couple for some reason, but he eventually revealed it. After reading through it quickly, Cas deflated slightly. “I see now why this is supposed to be for existing couples. We’re supposed to go back to our first date and recreate it as closely as possible, even down to our outfits. Then, talk about our favorite things about each other, as well as what our first impressions were.” 

_ Yes, because nothing could possibly go wrong there. _


	5. In the Beginning

**Dean**

“Wait, didn’t we go see a scary movie with like seven other people on our first date?” Dean thought back to sophomore year and smiled.

Cas laughed and put the book away. “I think we were both on dates with other people, but yes. That was the first time we hung out. We saw… what was it, some cheesy horror movie? And then there was a bonfire after, wasn’t there?”

“Cheesy? _All Saints Day_ is a friggin classic! Bet you they’re still playin’ one of ‘em, they almost always are.” Dean grabbed his phone. “And yeah, you were dating that dick that is _not_ invited. Hell, no one is invited. Just us.”

The smile he got from Cas was unexpected, but kinda awesome. “You were dating Lisa Braeden. She hated me, remember? I’m not going to complain about not inviting anyone else.”

“Ugh... well I hate her, too. You know she lied and said she was pregnant after I broke up with her? I was scared shitless for months my damn senior year. Fuck her.” Dean always got angry when he heard her name.

Cas came over and refilled Dean’s glass. “I’m sorry I brought her up. I promise, it’ll just be us this time. Though... I should warn you, I was practically in Michael’s lap last time. Horror and I don’t mix very well.”

Dean laughed. “We’ll go to dinner... Wait, was it Taco Bell? Okay, we’ll go to Taco Bell and then get a drink for courage, and then you can just sit in my lap. I don’t mind.”

“I don’t think I’ll need to take it that far, but… we’ll see how I feel after ten minutes with David Yeager,” Cas joked. “We better get some sleep, then.” 

“You’re right. Night, Cas. See you in the mornin’.” They went into their rooms, and Dean couldn’t help himself. Pretending to kiss Cas got him going in ways he didn’t expect, and if he rubbed one out that night, that was his business.

~~~~

“C’mon, Cas! Taco Bell won’t know what hit ‘em.” Dean called up the stairs. “Don’t gotta get dolled up, honey. I know you’re pretty.”

Cas swore loudly and then came downstairs, his hair sticking up in the back. “I can’t get it to lie flat. Whatever, deal with it.” He took the stairs quickly and lightly touched Dean’s side as he passed him. “It’s hard picking a shirt that is nice enough for an actual date but disposable enough that I don’t care if I drop eight pounds of burrito on it.”

“You look great.” Dean touched his hair. “Any of these pet names stickin’ yet?” He practically called Cas something new every date.

A bright blue, teasing gaze fixed on him. “All of them. Don’t stop, or I’ll call off the whole project and you’ll have to go back to dating boring people.”

“Ew, gross. I don’t think there’s any goin’ back. I’m too awesome.” Dean opened the door and automatically walked towards Baby. “We’re about to pig out on some fake Mexican food. You wanna drive through and park to eat, or go inside?”

Cas laughed as he got in. “Have you seen the way I handle a burrito? It’s best that we go inside, unless you want refried beans all over the upholstery.”

“Don’t you dare.” Dean started her up and went to the Taco Bell closest to the theater. They ate way too much, and by the time they walked down to the bar, they were almost too full to have a drink. “Can’t eat like I used to.” He rubbed his belly, acting like he didn’t just eat five burritos all to himself.

The stain on Cas’ shirt proved that he couldn’t, either. “I don’t know if I even have room for alcohol… we planned this all wrong. We’re going to regret eating so much when we get to the theater and don't have room for candy.” They got their drinks quickly, and Cas glanced around the bar. “It’s kind of nice that it’s empty like this. We should come early more often.”

“I agree. Plus, I can actually hear you.” Dean took a slow sip. “We got like 20 minutes before the movie starts.”

Cas bit his lip and got up, fishing some dollars out of his pocket and heading for the jukebox. A few moments later, _Beautiful Loser_ was playing throughout the bar and Cas came back over, looking satisfied. “I figured we’d give the _real_ Seger some attention, since the other one is so neglected.”

Dean pouted and then shot back his drink. “He got some attention last night.” He blushed, because _why the fuck did I say that?!_

The blush on Cas’ face told Dean that _his_ little Seger probably did, too, but Cas didn’t confirm. “There’s nothing wrong with that, and that’s why we have porn, right?”

_Didn’t need it._ “Yup. My hand is just fine. I’m committed to this, Cas.” Dean started singing to change the subject, and Cas didn’t stop him. 

Ten minutes later, they were hastily running into the theater. Traffic had been worse than Dean thought, but the race was actually kinda fun. They grabbed some candy just in case and made their way into the small theater, which was completely empty. “Holy shit,” Cas said. “When was the last time we were the only people at a movie?”

“Never... this is awesome. We’re doin’ this one again for sure.” When the movie started, Dean interlocked their fingers and smiled. “You held Michael’s hand last time...” _Smooth._

Cas stared at where their fingers interlocked and nodded a couple of times, almost unsure. “I did, I did do that. Thank you, Dean.” His cheeks flushed and he pointedly looked at the screen, but held a little tighter.

As usual, the movie was awesome. Cas held his hand the whole time and Dean couldn’t help but smile. He took a chance and held it all the way to Baby. “So... bonfire?”

“Yes. I don’t think we’re allowed to have them where we live, but my father’s house is technically empty right now. We could go there?” Cas looked hesitant to let go of Dean’s hand, but did, then his eyes darted around the parking lot like he thought the Hatchetman himself was going to come out of the shadows.

“Are you scared?” Dean grinned. “Like I’d ever let anything happen to you.” They got in and drove to Cas’ dad’s in comfortable silence, Dean’s classic rock mix filling the space as the sun set before them.

When they arrived, Cas looked up at the house with a sad expression. “Do you think he’ll ever come home?” His father had suffered a pretty bad stroke the year before and was currently in an assisted living facility, and it was something Cas struggled with a lot. “It’s just… weird, being here without him.”

Dean fought the urge to hug him. Losing parents was hard, but watching them go slow like Cas was had to be heartbreaking. “I think he’ll be alright, Cas. Jagger can kick anyone and anything’s ass.” 

Cas smiled softly and they walked around back, where Dean got the fire going and Cas found a couple of lawn chairs for them to sit in. “Okay, so… the last part of this date is talking about our favorite things about each other, and our first impressions.”

_This won't be awkward at all._ Dean bit his lip and thought back to the day he met Cas and huffed a laugh. “You first.”

“I think I’ll start with my first impression of you. Honestly? I thought you were an asshole. An extremely good looking asshole.” Cas chuckled at Dean’s offended expression and held up a hand, so Dean shut up and let him continue. “But, that was before I talked to you the first time. So, my first _real_ impression of you was much better. I thought you were kind, and funny, and someone that could be counted on. I still think all of those things today.”

“Aww, shucks.” Dean took a breath and braced himself for talking about things he wasn’t used to talking about. “I kinda was an asshole in high school, but not to the people I cared about. My first impression? Hell, I dunno, but I knew I cared about you. Obviously, your eyes caught me off guard, and I was so deep in the closet my imaginary friend was half goat. But there was just somethin’ about you. Then we hung out and talked and I thought you were awesome. Someone I could finally be myself with, and back then you were _so_ hard to make smile. I liked the challenge, and made it like a daily goal to make you laugh at least once if we hung out.” Dean gallic shrugged, “I always did, too.” _Wasn’t easy, either._ “What’re your favorite things about me?” 

Cas huffed, staring down at the grass. “I love how… freely you give. Whether it’s compliments, the shirt off your back, or your help. You are the least selfish person I know. And, while I’ll never admit this again, I love your stupid, ridiculous jokes. They’re only funny because you laugh harder at them than anyone else. It’s so endearing it’s almost annoying.” His nose crinkled with his smile, and the flames were catching him in just the right light. “Oh, and I’d be doing a disservice to the whole world if I neglected to mention your sleepy, morning voice. You take on almost a… southern drawl when you’re tired, and it sometimes makes me regret the fact that you’re usually gone when I get up.” He let out an embarrassed laugh and fidgeted with his fingernails. “Something tells me I probably went too far there.”

By the time Cas finished, Dean was blushing so hard the bonfire felt hotter. “Wow… thanks, Cas.” _Why the hell haven’t I tried to date this guy again?_ “For the record, I _am_ hilarious. And that morning voice is a secret. Can’t help it, I was born in Kansas.”

“I didn’t think people from Kansans _had_ southern accents, but… whatever you say.” Cas grinned and seemed more at ease, which was good. “Now, finish this off so we can go home. Tell me all the things you love about me, Dean. I can’t _wait_ to hear this list.”

Dean sat back and thought about the things he liked about Cas. He didn’t want to say anything physical, because anyone with eyes knew Cas was hot - they just didn’t know how much more than that he was. “I, uh… honestly like everything about you.” Dean sat forward to continue. “You’re so… strong. I know you don’t think so, but you are. I remember wishing I knew how to unapologetically be myself like you always did. I’m honestly who I am today because of you. I wanted to be strong and brave like you. You love so goddamn fiercely, never fake it for anyone, and you're just… _always_ there, no matter what. I friggin admire you, Cas.” _Oh yeah, that’s why we haven’t dated. People who date almost always break up… and I can’t ever lose him._

**Castiel**

Cas avoided Charlie like the plague over the next couple of days. The last date with Dean had been draining in ways he hadn’t expected - and brought up a lot of confusing emotions. He chalked most of it up to being at his dad’s house while he was stuck in some facility trying to recover, and the fact that he and Dean rarely used their words like that. 

It wasn’t as though Cas wasn’t aware Dean cared for him, it was evident enough in their day to day life. But all of that? It sounded like once upon a time, Dean had had an actual crush on him, which was kind of disappointing. Not because Cas didn’t want it to be true, but because back in high school, _he_ had had a crush on _Dean._

_Hm. Missed opportunities, I suppose. At any rate, things worked out the way they should have and we’re such good friends now that it’s silly to dwell on the past._

By Tuesday, he couldn’t avoid Charlie anymore. She caught up to him outside of Madbay’s psych building and cornered him against a wall. “Where the _hells_ have you been?”

“Busy. My course load is larger than I anticipated it would be, and trying to fake date Dean in the process means I have very little free time. My apologies, Charlie.” Cas side-stepped slightly to remove himself from the cage she put him in, but she didn’t relent. 

“That’s not a good excuse to ignore me, Cas.” She heaved a dramatic sigh and shifted her books. “I won’t press if you don’t want me to, but I’m tired of eating lunch alone. Just… come have a meal with me, okay? I promise I won’t be nosey.”

He regarded her with all the skepticism their storied friendship called for, but ultimately decided to trust her when his stomach growled audibly enough that she pointed at it. “Fine, fine. But if you so much as mention the name ‘Dean’ I’m running away.”

She gave him a look that suggested that right there was information enough, but stayed true to her word during lunch. They talked about her, mostly, which was probably a welcome change for Charlie as well as Cas. 

Tuesdays were shorter days for him, which meant he left campus in time to make a grocery run before going home and starting on his mounting load of homework. He was finding it particularly hard to concentrate with the Pathokinesis book within sight, though, and eventually got up and moved to his bedroom with his laptop and books. _It’s becoming increasingly clear that these aren’t normal dates. Why I thought this would be as simple as a few movies and maybe a camping trip is beyond me, but now I’m terrified to scratch the next one off._

For all Dean’s compliments about Cas being unapologetically himself, Cas struggled with new situations. That lip reading fiasco was the stuff of nightmares for him, particularly once the video caught on and the hit count reached the hundreds. _What’s next, am I going to have to recite the Pledge of Allegiance whilst standing on my head with Dean holding my feet?_

The thought made him shiver, and though he tried to tell himself that it _wasn’t_ because such a position would put Dean’s mouth entirely too close to his cock, the thickening in his shorts proved otherwise. _This is normal. It’s a natural reaction to forced intimacy, and at the end of the day, that’s exactly what this project is. Forced intimacy._

Cas powered through a couple of assignments and finally convinced himself to open his project notes. He’d held off on writing anything down for the most recent date, but now he was starting to regret that. _If I want this to be as accurate as possible given the circumstances, I need to start taking the notes immediately to document my true reaction. Waiting days only allows me time to dwell too much. Okay, I need to put myself back by that bonfire._

Closing his eyes, Cas let his fingers dance across the keys as he attempted to recreate that night in his mind. He’d felt open, vulnerable, like one wrong step would have him consumed completely by the fire. _But why?_ Cas opened his eyes and stared at his notes, temporarily impressed with himself at the overall lack of errors. _This wasn’t strictly new for us. We’ve talked about the things we like about each other before, and the whole premise of that date was recreating a scenario we’d been in previously. Nothing was new, so why did it feel so… incomplete, like we were missing something important that was staring us in the face?_

He shut his laptop and rubbed his eyes under his glasses. _I simply don’t have enough information there to draw a conclusion. That’s all it is. I need more information. Our next date is in a couple of days, maybe something will shake loose in my brain by then._

Laying his head back and relaxing for a couple of minutes sounded like a great idea, so that’s what he did. It wasn’t until Dean was waking him up to tell him dinner was ready that he even realized he’d fallen asleep. He sat up slowly, pulling off his glasses and rubbing the spot on his face where the nose piece had dug in uncomfortably. “What time is it?”

“It’s after seven, Cas. You good?” Dean sat on the edge of his bed and regarded him like someone would regard a sick child. 

Cas huffed and moved the blanket off him. “Yes, I’m fine. I was just resting my eyes for a moment and must’ve… lost track of time. I’m sorry I didn’t have dinner ready, I know how hard you work.”

“Hey, it’s not _actually_ your job to feed me. Y’know that, right? I just threw one of those frozen pizzas in, no big deal. Besides, seems like you worked that big, giant brain of yours just as hard as I worked my body today. I think we’re even.” He patted Cas’ leg and stood up, making his way toward the door. “C’mon, we’ll eat and have a beer, then you can come right back to bed.”

Cas followed him down, smiling to himself with every step. “You know, you’re going to make someone a fantastic husband someday, if you ever allow yourself to be one.” 

“Pfft. Not in the cards, sweetheart. Guess you’re stuck with me.”

Cas rolled his eyes with a fond look and picked up a slice of pizza, wholly satisfied when the food settled the uneasiness in his gut. If he’d ever been more grateful for Dean, he didn’t know it. 

~~~~

“Love is generally - though not explicitly - defined as having three core elements. Intimacy, commitment, and passion.” Professor Ketch leaned forward on his desk and eyed the room, and Cas took a deep breath. _Here we go._ “Love can, and often does, exist with a combination of the three, but true, lasting love generally requires some degree of those core elements. If you have intimacy and passion but no commitment, the trust between partners can suffer. That’s not taking into consideration polyamory or other such arrangements when partners are on the same page, no… we’re talking specifically of couples for the purposes of this lecture. We will dive further into polyamory next week.” 

He continued to speak about how having commitment and passion but no intimacy can often lead to feelings of insecurity down the road. One partner could crave intimacy that the other isn’t capable or willing to give, which can foster resentment, fear, insecurity, and even anger. If neither partner is willing to share in at least a shred of intimacy, there’s more than likely an underlying reason for that. _Yes, they probably don’t love each other. Relationships like that are often ones of convenience or comfort, not love and connection._

While the lecture had so far been interesting despite its utter lack of new information, it was Ketch’s points on the last of the combinations that truly drew Cas’ attention. “Intimacy and commitment without passion, now… that’s a different scenario altogether, isn’t it? You can have those things with family, friends, and even to a certain extent… your future patients. Does that equate love? Perhaps, but not necessarily romantic love. _Passion_ is the thing that most often bridges the gap between platonic and romantic love. Without passion, well… this is strictly off the record, as I’m delving into areas of conjecture here, but… I’ve never seen a romantic relationship go the distance without some base level of raw, ever-kindling passion.”

_That’s what it is. There’s no passion between me and Dean. We’ve clearly obtained a level of intimacy, and we’re obviously committed to each other in some way, but there’s no romantic passion. That’s why our little experiment by the bonfire felt so strange… the underlying, unspoken goal of that particular date was to fuel a passion that simply isn’t there… and I was merely recognizing that void without being able to put a name to it at the time._ Cas was so relieved he would have laughed, but knew it wasn’t the time or place for that. He clicked over on his laptop to his notes for the project and jotted down his most recent discovery, feeling much better by the time he left that class. 

_There. Now, I know what’s missing, and I know how to work around it for the purposes of the project. Things are back in order as they should be, and I don’t foresee myself being in for any more surprises._

_The rest should be… textbook._


	6. Swap Meat

**Dean**

“Man, I can’t wait for fall.” Dean wiped his forehead as Sam tossed him a water.

He scoffed. “We make less money these coming seasons. Why rush it?”

“For one, I _save_ my money, Samsquash. Maybe you shouldn’t have got a damn brand new plastic car with $400 payments every month.” 

“Don’t get on me for liking things from this half of the century. You’re an old soul. Bet you have a shoe box under your bed for your savings,” Sam teased, and he wasn’t wrong.

“Don’t worry about my savings account. Did that one dude ever ask about Cas again?” _Ugh, that wasn’t a smooth transition at all. Way to stay under the radar, Dean. Look at ‘em… he’s got about fifty questions running though his mind right friggin now._

“He did actually, but they talk all the time.” 

Dean failed miserably in hiding his shock and annoyance. “What?!”

How hard Sam laughed should have earned him a punch in the face, but Dean actually _did_ want to know what the hell he meant.

“I’m joking, Dean. Wow… just… wow.”

“Shut up.” Dean walked back over to his side of the room and grabbed his hammer. “I oughtta deck you for that.”

“Why would you care? You’re _fake_ dating, remember?”

“S’not the point, asshat. We took a vow or whatever. No dating other people. If he’s lyin’, I’m gettin’ laid tonight. Why should I be the only one all in this?” 

It seemed to do the trick and Dean nearly questioned the look of disappointment on Sam’s face, but knew it was better if this conversation just ended. 

Back in safe territory, they talked about Sam’s relationship, politics, and the friggin weather. Anything but Cas.

~~~~

That night, Dean couldn’t sleep if the Sandman paid him. 

He tossed and turned until he was completely out of options. He _needed_ some damn release. 

Since that damn bad lip reading debacle, he had refrained from jacking off. He shouldn’t think of Cas while doing that, especially right now while they were blurring the line between romance and friendship nearly every day. 

He needed some old fashioned porn in his life… Okay, maybe not old fashioned. These days, porn was literally at his fingertips thanks to smartphones. If Dean had had this as a teen, he never would have left his room. 

He quickly realized that _Busty Asian Beauties_ wasn’t gonna cut it this round - or any chicks for that matter. Their moans sounded annoying, and his dick hardly gave a pathetic twitch as a girl climaxed. _Time for dicks._

He might have looked for dark haired dudes, but if he did, no one had to know and it didn’t take long for him to find a good one. 

Coming was an entirely different situation. Porn never failed him, why was it now? It took him closing his eyes and listening to the moans and grunts to finally get little Seger on board.

He edged a few times, fighting back real life thoughts as he got closer and closer to the edge before his mind drifted to that damn livestream - that he watched three times since - and how pliant Cas was when he lifted him and laid him down on the couch. Dean’s hand sped up when he remembered Cas’ scent filling all of his senses and he had never been closer to kissing his best friend.

What if he had? What if he pressed his mouth to those perfect pink lips and Cas let him in. How far would it go? 

Would Cas let him touch him? Suck him? Fuck him? 

Would he- _ah fuck!_ Dean emptied into his fist with a groan and collapsed back onto his pillow. _That had nothing to do with Cas… I was already close. It’s normal to think about friends anyway. Right?_

~~~~

“Dean, will you get that please? How many times are you going to let him knock!” Cas was yelling down the stairs, but Dean didn’t particularly feel like moving. He could hear Jask knocking just fine, but getting up to let him in meant… y’know, getting up. 

“Yes, _dear!”_ Dean got up and rolled his eyes as he walked to the door to yank it open. “Don’t you asshats have a key by now?”

Jask waved the key in his face with a cheeky grin. “Yes, but Ares told me I couldn’t use it without permission. I ganked it from under the rock like three weeks ago.”

“Thank god for him.” Dean waved them in. “You ready to swap wives, Ares?”

Nodding like an asshole, Ares stepped inside around Jask. “He’s all yours. Where’s Cas at, anyway?”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Jask muttered to Dean, mocking Ares. _“He’s all yours.”_

“Means I can do whatever I want. But you can’t. Paws off my wife, and feed him in the next hour and a half or feel his wrath.” Dean glanced over at the stairs and could tell Cas heard that. “Oh, that reminds me, he also needs to be watered after he’s fed.”

Ares barked a laugh. “And now we know why he’s not _actually_ your wife.” He walked over, pulling Jask into a kiss. “You keep your hands off, too.” 

“Wouldn’t dream of touching anyone else.” Jask kissed him again and took a step back, biting his lip and turning to Dean. “Let’s go before I change my mind.”

Dean rolled his eyes and opened the door. “Wait, how’d I get stuck with the hairy one?” He teased as Jask pulled him out the door. “What are we gonna do, anyway? Get drunk? Cause I could seriously use a drink.” Dean kicked a rock as they walked over to Jask and Ares’ house. It had been a while since he’d been there, but when they walked inside, it looked the same.

Jask shrugged and opened the cupboard with the liquor. “If you want to, sure. Long week? Or marriage problems?”

_Marriage problems?? Oh wait, I started that joke._ “Long ass, hot ass week. How are things with you, you still workin’ security?”

“Yep, probably will ’til I’m too old to carry a weapon.” He grinned, pouring Dean a double and sliding it over. “Not a whole lotta use for a body this big if I’m not in some kinda security.”

“True. Could do construction too but you like packin’ heat too much.” Dean grinned and shot back his drink and groaned at the burn. “You and Ares still nauseatingly adorable?”

Jask nodded, raising a drink of his own. “We have our moments, but yeah. Things are still good. Real good. I’m tellin’ ya, D. Nothing better than dating your best friend.” He raised his eyebrows as he refilled Dean’s glass. “But I get it, sometimes there are just... lines.”

“What exactly are those lines again? Cause I keep forgettin’.” Dean took another drink and avoided Jask’s eyes. _Why even start this conversation if you don’t know how to have it?_

A rare moment of silence stretched between them before Jask spoke. “Shit isn’t for the faint of heart. It’s not like a normal relationship, y’know? You can’t just half-ass it until someone either picks up the slack and walks away. It’s real, and so are the consequences. Not to mention, the sex will be all or nothing.”

_Definitely not ready for this conversation._ “Yeah... okay... how long were you guys friends before?” _That’s safe. Talk about them._

“Couple of years. Never thought twice about it until I walked in on Ares getting fucked by some random asshole. Hence why he told me I had to ask permission before using the key... old habits and all that. I was so jealous I couldn’t see straight.” He chuckled quietly and spun his glass. “I was crazy about him, just too stupid to admit it cause I liked sleeping around.”

_Sounds... familiar._ “Got it. And then he told you to get your head out of your ass and fuck him yourself, eh, Ron Weasley?” Dean drank more alcohol as a distraction and drained the cup.

Jask gallic shrugged. “Pretty much. Neither one of us have looked back since. It was just... right, y’know?”

“Yeah, makes sense. Glad that all worked out for you two. You’re fuckin’ adorable together. So adorable it’s gross.”

A wide, sappy grin plastered itself on Jask’s face. “Hey, don't worry about it. I’m sure you’ll get laid like… an hour after Cas’ project ends. Maybe not even.” Jask pulled out a couple of red plastic cups and a handful of butter knives. 

“Not even? You don’t think I can hold out for his project?” Dean eyed him. “What’s that for?”

Jask looked at him curiously as he pulled out a shot glass. “I meant less than an hour, not that you wouldn’t make it. No way you’d let Cas down. Not a chance.” He set the butter knives in a line with a couple of inches between each one, then dropped the shot glass in the middle. “Flip cup, but better. Each time you flip it, you move the shot closer to me. I flip it right, I move it back toward you. Loser drinks. Figured we should do some husband shit since the wives are probably arguing over Rosetta Stone editions or charting stars.”

Dean laughed. “You’re hilarious. Let’s go, Chuckles. You’re on.” He rubbed his hands together and stood on the other side. “Make it a double.”

“How bout the shot is just a placeholder, and loser drinks til the winner says stop?”

“Damn... you know I’m down.” Once the game started, both of them were muscling the cup too hard from excitement, but once they got a rhythm, it was on. The damn shot glass went back and forth over and over, and Dean realized how bad Jask wanted to win. _Shit... hope I’m not hungover tomorrow. Gonna be a helluva night._

**Castiel**

“What do you think they’re doing over there?”

“Probably getting drunk or doing push-ups. I don’t know, they get weird when they’re together.” He laughed and got comfy on the couch after they ate. “How is the project going?”

Cas sat on the opposite end and grabbed a blanket, shrugging as he nodded. “It’s not the trainwreck I expected it to be, though I’m still unsure if it’ll yield any usable results. It does state that at some point, we’ll need to double date. Would you and Jask be willing?”

“Of course. That would be fun. And entertaining to watch, sorry... Or almost sorry.” Ares chuckled and grabbed his water.

Rolling his eyes, Cas flipped open his laptop. He loved hanging out with Ares because it was normally low-key enough he could multitask. “It’s honestly not any different than before. We held hands during a movie, but other than that, not a single thing has truly been different.”

“That’s really cute. No kisses yet?”

_I should’ve known that didn’t come across correctly._ “He only held my hand because I’m a child when it comes to horror movies. It wasn’t really _cute_ so much as… kind. And no, the closest we’ve come was acting out that Twilight scene, but Dean made a point to not actually make contact.” 

“That was hilarious by the way, did you watch it back? His eyes went wide like he had no control over what he had just said, it was adorable.” Ares much have sensed Cas was uncomfortable and changed the subject. “So, how are other things?”

Cas cleared his throat, glad he didn’t have to talk about Dean’s mind immediately going to pussy. “Classes are going well. I… really don’t have much else going on. I’ll probably visit my dad tomorrow morning, but it might have to wait until Sunday. How about you?”

“Things are good. Thinking about getting a dog. We’ve talked about it for a while, but my birthday is coming up and I want a damn dog.”

Grinning, Cas tilted his head. “My birthday is next month. When is yours, and why don’t I already know this?”

“Really? It’s Halloween. Fitting, right?” Ares motioned to his eyes, and Cas yet again admired the heterochromia. He’d always loved that feature, especially about Ares. 

“Yes, it’s fitting, but in a good way. Mine’s September 1st, though… I can’t imagine there will be much of a celebration.” _Or rather, I hope there isn’t._ “It’s a Tuesday this year.”

They fell into comfortable silence after that, with Ares watching television while Cas worked on his assignments until they heard commotion on the back patio. Cas raised his eyebrows and met Ares’ eyes. _Here we go._

“Oh my god, are they touching the grill? They shouldn’t use fire, Cas. I can hear how trashed they are.” Ares got up and walked over, sliding the door open to reveal Dean and Jask doing exactly that. 

Cas sighed and stayed where he was, shaking his head as Jask swatted Dean’s hand. “No! I want Mexican, you don’t need anymore meat. You want meat? Go find your… _wife,”_ he grunted, bumping Dean’s hip with his own. 

Dean shoved him aside and walked in the house. “Where’s my wife?”

The butterflies were strange, but not entirely unexpected. _Stress butterflies are a real thing, because I say they are._ Cas was still sitting on the recliner and looked up over his laptop screen. “Oh, hello. Did you have fun, _husband?”_

When he spotted Cas, Dean stumbled over with a cheesy grin, moved his laptop aside, and climbed into Cas’ lap to cuddle. “I found ‘im.”

_What in the…_ Cas carefully wrapped his arms around Dean and smiled softly at the smell of his cologne warring for attention over the stench of alcohol. “Are you okay?”

“Ah, shit!” Jask yelled. “Told you they were in lo- _ow!_ Damnit, Ares, what was that for?”

“Shh!” Ares whispered.

“M’fine. G’night.” Dean slumped for a second and then got up quickly. “J needs Mexican food. Can we order Taco Bell?”

Cas pinched his eyebrows together, staring at the spot where Dean just was. _Why the hell do I want him to come back?_

Jask tried to push Dean back toward Cas. “Yes, Ares and I will go get it. Go back to where you were.”

“Okay.” Dean dropped to his knees and nuzzled back in between Cas’ legs. “Wake me when food...” 

Ares laughed loudly at that, and grabbed J’s hand. “Be right back.”

Cas shot Ares a pleading look, but he only winked and dragged Jask outside. “Uhm...” Cas stared down at the head in his lap and gently ran his fingers through Dean’s hair, surprised at how soft it really was. “That can’t be comfortable.”

Dean just hummed and nuzzled in more. “J cheated.”

“What?” Cas froze, immediately assuming the worst. _No, he’d never cheat on Ares. I’ve never seen a man more in love._ “Cheated on what?”

“Game. The game. He fucked with my cup or somethin’.” Dean sat up with his hair spiked up and started kicking off his shoes. “Stay there, yer comfy.”

As adorable as that was, it screamed bad idea. “You need water and food. If I know Jask and Ares, they’re not coming back. Go upstairs and change into something more comfortable. I’ll bring you some food in a couple of minutes.”

“M‘kay.” Dean loudly stomped up the stairs and Cas could hear when he collapsed on the bed.

Grateful he’d already pulled bacon out for the following morning, he made Dean some scrambled cheesy eggs, bacon, and toast. He threw it all on a paper plate and grabbed a Gatorade, then made his way up to Dean’s room. 

He was wearing nothing but boxers, sprawled out on his stomach. Cas stopped dead for a moment, studying the perfect curve of his ass. “Dean?” He cleared his throat quietly and walked over, sitting on the edge of the bed. “Bacon.”

“Bacon.” Dean repeated like a caveman and then rolled on his side to eat with one eye still closed.

Cas rolled his eyes, but remembered he’d been in Dean’s position not that long ago and didn’t have room to judge. “You had better not be hungover for our date tomorrow.”

“Nah... be right as rain... that’s a sayin’, right?” Dean stuffed his mouth and groaned. “So good. I wuv you,” he mumbled around his food.

“I know you do.” Cas squeezed Dean’s thigh and stood up, pointing to the Gatorade. “Make sure you drink all of that, okay? Promise me.”

_“Yessss,_ dear.” Dean made sarcastic kissy lips and then smiled a toothless grin.

Cas huffed and quirked an eyebrow. “Don’t offer if you’re not willing to follow through.” He laughed at his own joke, turning on his heel. “Do you want your light on or off?” 

“Off. Thanks, Cas.” Dean plopped on his back and sighed.

He lingered for a moment longer, watching Dean take the first sip of Gatorade. “You’re welcome. And by the way? I _wuv_ you, too... even if you are an idiot.” Cas grinned and flipped off the light, then headed back downstairs to clean up.

~~~~

The next morning, Dean was still dead to the world when Cas got ready to leave. He left some aspirin next to a coffee-filled travel mug with a note that said ‘Take me’, then snuck out as quietly as he could to go see his father. 

He hated the assisted living facility he was staying in. It was so small compared to what Jagger was used to, and quite frankly, it smelled. 

Cas’ eyes lingered on the families in the common area as he waited for the elevator that would take him to Jagger’s floor. _I wonder how many of them will get to have Christmas at home instead of here? Will I?_

He knocked quietly on his father’s door and walked inside, taking in the tiny room with a bed, television, and virtually nothing else. “Hi, Dad.”

“Hey, Castiel.” Jagger sat up in his bed and coughed. “Damn dry air here.”

Seeing his father like that was terrible, but he kept his expression as angst-free as he could as he sat down. “You’d think they could get you a humidifier or something. Are they treating you alright? I can look into having you moved if they’re not.”

“No, no.” He smiled over at his son. “They’re all nice here, plus... maybe I’ll be going home soon. I feel better.”

Cas studied his father’s face and noticed he _did_ look a little better, and his speech was clearer. Something tightened in his chest and tears welled behind his eyes, but stayed out of sight. “That’s wonderful news. Did they tell you how long?” 

“No. Maybe you can talk to them?” He coughed some more and groaned. “How’s that roommate? Still just friends?”

_Same old Dad._ He chose to ignore the question about Dean, and nodded. “Of course I’ll speak to them. The sooner we get you out of here, the better. Have you... have you spoken to Jimmy?” 

“He called last week. He’s still working at that bank. You haven’t spoken?” Jagger gave Cas that sad ‘dad’ look. “He’s getting married soon, son.” 

Cas shook his head slightly and dropped his eyes to his hands, which were tucked together on his lap. “No. He hasn’t spoken to me in… almost two years. I’m happy for him, though.” _Even though I don’t even know the name of my own twin’s girlfriend._

“Call him. I want to see you both soon... together. It’s been too long, and your mother would be heartbroken.”

_Yes, well. She’s not here anymore, and Jimmy walked away from me._ “I’ll give him a call on Sunday. If he’s working at the bank, he should be home then.” He reached over and brushed his fingers over the back of Jagger’s hand, shivering at how cold it was. “Tell me how I can help, Dad. Please. I know he doesn’t come see you as often as he should, and I’ll never believe they’re taking adequate care of you in here.”

“I’m not one to complain. They feed me three meals and every Friday I get to choose a cupcake or a cookie.” He shrugged. “Could be worse.”

“Next time I come, I’ll bring you a pie.” Cas stood, grabbing a blanket for him and spreading it over his legs. “Get some rest, I’ll go talk to the nurse and I’ll be back in a couple of days, okay?”

“Okay. I’m proud of you, Castiel. You’re doing so well for yourself. See you soon.” He smiled proudly and opened his arms for a hug.

Cas lingered in that hug for a little longer than necessary, then quietly excused himself. He spoke to the nurses briefly, but they told him they couldn’t give him any answers and he’d have to speak directly to his neurologist. 

That news didn’t do anything to make him feel better, but as he drove himself home, he reminded himself it was finally time for another date with Dean. 

_Great. Just another thing to stress out about... hopefully it’ll be something easy, and we can just have fun. I need a little bit of that right now._


	7. Just My Imagination

**Dean**

_ Date number four.  _

Dean had lunch on the counter when Cas got home from seeing Jagger. He always looked so drained, Dean wished there was some way to help. “Hey, sweetheart.” The nicknames had been coming out so naturally, Dean hardly recognized them anymore. “I made you a double decker pb&j. Let’s scratch this baby and have a good day. Hey, that rhymed.” 

He didn’t want to pressure Cas to talk about his visit with his dad, so he hoped the distraction would help. 

“Thank you, Dean.” He glanced at the book but ignored it, choosing the sandwich, instead. “I pick page seven. You select one and scratch off this time.”

“Yes, sir.” Dean wiped his hands on his sweats and grabbed the book. He scratched one off quickly and read it over, then looked up to meet Cas’ eyes. “Ah, hell.” He cleared his throat and read it to Cas while he slowly walked closer. “Step one, go to a thrift store and buy your partner an outfit of your choosing, with a minimum of three items. Step two, dress up, and give each other new names to use for the rest of the evening. Step three, do a public activity of your choosing, and step four, have a stranger take a picture of you guys in your outfits.”

Cas had stopped chewing entirely when Dean stopped in front of him, his cheeks flushed red. “You’re joking.”

“Nope.” Dean flipped the book over to face Cas. “Any new name ideas or will we pick after the outfits?”

Sighing, Cas took another bite. “That’s step two, so... I think we’re supposed to wait, so we can pick something fitting. Though, we can choose our own activity. Bowling, maybe? Mini golf? Ice cream?”

“Let’s mini golf. They have that ice cream parlor attached, and we’re overachievers, Cas.” Dean did a goofy dance. “Can’t wait to dress you up...  _ wife.” _ He winked and clicked his tongue.

Cas narrowed his eyes as he polished off his sandwich, pausing dramatically. “I swear to all the gods, Dean, if you dress me up in a maid’s outfit, there will be all seven hells to pay.”

“Why not? You’d look hot in a maid outfit.” Dean surprised himself saying that out loud, and he turned to leave. “Ima get dressed.”

He ran up the stairs and threw on some jeans and a plain shirt. Who knew what the hell Cas would pick for his outfit, so it was better not to get attached to any clothes right now. 

Once his hair was done and he felt he looked decent enough, he stumbled down the stairs. “Alright, ready to go, honey?”

Cas was still regarding him like he was an alien, but smirked slightly. “You know... I actually had one for a while. Michael made me throw it away.” He turned on his heel and grabbed Dean’s keys, tossing them over his shoulder to Dean as he walked out the door.

“I’ll never know what you saw in that friggin statue. Did he ever smile?” Dean locked the door behind them and opened Cas’ door.

“He wasn’t afraid to admit he liked me, and at that point in my life... that made a huge difference.” They piled in the car, and Cas continued once getting his seatbelt on. “And he wasn’t always a statue. He was actually quite bendy.”

“Gross. TMI.”  _ Not jealous, just don’t care to picture that asshat like that. _ Dean nodded at the radio. “You get to pick since it’s date night.”

Cas smiled and flipped through his cassette tapes, settling on Van Halen’s  _ 1984\.  _ They jammed the rest of the way, and when Dean parked outside the thrift store, Cas looked a little nervous. “Okay, we can do this. It’s fine. No hard feelings, it’s all just… for humor, right?” 

“Yep. Don’t worry, Cas. I think it’ll be fun, and if it’s not… I’m sure we’ll make up for it next time.” They went in, and Dean immediately saw about twelve outfits he’d kill to see Cas in.  _ Gotta find the perfect one…  _

Dean took his time going through the men’s side but found nothing fun.  _ This is supposed to be fun, not sexy. Cas is my wife after all.  _ He made his way to the ladies side and ducked out of view. The bright orange blouse was screaming his name and the flowered skirt was made for Cas’ hips. When he picked it up, he realized they weren’t flowers, but the weird old lady print was still awesome. The third item was the hardest but finding those size twelve flip flops felt like kismet.

Ten minutes later, Cas met up with him in the checkout line holding what looked like a pair of slacks, a belt, and a bandana or something. He was regarding the orange lump in Dean’s arms like he was about to hurl himself off the roof, but clenched his jaw and smiled politely at the cashier. 

When it was time to exchange, they shoved the bundles into each other’s arms and used the restroom stalls to swap their outfits.  _ The hell is this!  _ Dean slid on the too tight slacks and the useless belt, then held out a damn crop top.  _ Superman?!  _ “I’m Batman, Cas! Batman!” He begrudgingly put it on, messing his hair in the process but he didn’t care. He looked ridiculous either way.

Cas refused to come out of the stall. “Dean, I look like a lunatic. And these shoes… how did you even find women’s sandals in my size?!”

“It’s called fate, babe. C’mon out, lemme see you, wife.” He stood tall and waited with a huge grin. 

Slowly, Cas unlocked the door and let it swing open. It was a testament to how bitchy his bitchface was that Dean noticed  _ that  _ before the outfit. “Dean. We’re getting divorced.”

“Woohoo, spin for me, Betty! Hey, the name came to me.” Dean clicked his tongue and finger gunned Cas.  _ Man, he’s gonna kill me one day.  _

He stepped out of the stall and eyed Dean’s bare stomach. “If I’m Betty, that makes you Al… but I’m tempted to call you Clark.”

“Call me Al!” Dean sang and walked over to spin Cas and dance for three seconds before pulling away. “Let’s go mini golf, hot stuff.”

Cas was laughing but looking like he was pissed about it, which worked just fine for Dean. “I don’t know how you expect me to play mini golf in these shoes, but… whatever. A deal is a deal…  _ hero.” _ A second later, Cas snorted like he realized that wasn’t an insult like he hoped it would be. 

Dean grabbed his hand and walked back to the car. “You can wear your normal shoes, now I feel bad.”

“No, no. We said when we started this entire endeavor that we wouldn’t back down for anything except for sex. Some uncomfortable shoes certainly aren’t going to stop me.” Cas’ eyes flicked down Dean’s body and he huffed a laugh. “It’s worth it, anyway.”

“Is it? This belt buckle is diggin’ into my stomach.” Dean adjusted it slightly and then looked around. “It’s two blocks away. Wanna walk there and have a stranger take a picture?”

Cas looked down at his skirt and heaved an incredibly dramatic sigh. “I suppose. Although, I have to admit... the breeze is nice.” He started walking, pulling Dean along with him and clunking along awkwardly in the shoes.

“Breeze? Are you...  _ naked _ under there??” Dean asked, way too curious. “Shit, imagine if you gotta boner in one of those.” He laughed obnoxiously and almost made it his goal of the night. 

“Yes, I tried to keep my boxers on but they kept bunching up, so I took them off. I think it’ll take an act of god to give me a boner at this point.” 

Dean paid for their mini golf ticket and then walked back toward the course. There were a couple of chicks there and Dean asked them to take the photo. “Thank you, my wife is very shy.” He grinned and waved Cas over.

He reluctantly shuffled over and bent down to fix his sandal, then stood and exhaled hard. “I’m not his wife, I’m a captive against my will and would appreciate it very much if someone called the authorities.”

The girls just giggled, and Dean gallic shrugged. “You see any chains? He’s free to go, but he  _ did _ just say we were getting a divorce.” Dean pouted at the girls and then at Cas.

One of the girls grabbed his phone to take the photo. “Put your arm around him. You’re standing too far apart.”

Cas eyed Dean for a moment and then pulled him close, resting his head against Dean’s chest and wrapping his arms around his bare skin. “Is this close enough, or should he pick me up? I advise against that, I’m not wearing any underwear and it’s hot out here.”

The girl laughed. “Definitely pick you up, then.”

Dean pretended he was about to, but stopped. “Okay, okay. Smile for the camera, Betty.”

The picture actually turned out kinda cute despite the ridiculous outfits, and it was time to finally play some mini golf. Cas was a disaster, but by the third hole, he was laughing his ass off. 

He never could stay mad at Dean. 

“Have we put ourselves through enough torture? I saw some kids taking pictures. Bet this damn date gets us even more internet famous than that video did.”

Cas shook his head, pulling his skirt out and spinning around. “You just want to quit because you’re about to get your ass handed to you by a man in a skirt,  _ Al.” _ He grinned widely, coming over and stopping way too damn close to Dean. “Say “uncle” and we’ll go get ice cream and get back into our normal clothes.”

_ Goddammit. _ “Uncle these nuts, Betty.” Dean lined up with his putter and hit the ball in. “Boom. I was tryna be nice, pretty legs, but now it’s on.”

“I think it’s  _ my _ nuts we need to worry about. I think I’m starting to chafe.” He chuckled and leaned over to line up his shot, swearing under his breath. “Who puts a fucking light house in the middle of a perfectly good golf course?”

Dean actually felt really bad about Cas’ nuts and decided ice cream was more important than winning. “Fine, uncle. Let’s go ice those nuts.” 

**Castiel**

Cas wasn’t sure he’d ever been so uncomfortable in his life, but he had to admit he was having fun. Being mad at Dean was just a bonus. He so rarely found excuses to be cross with him that when he  _ did  _ find them, he tended to go a little overboard. They started walking back to the car after returning their equipment, and Cas nudged him. “I’m offended that those girls didn’t care about my cry for help.”

“Sorry, I already won them over.” Dean chuckled and opened the door. “You climb in and change first. I’ll go after.” He shrugged off his crop top and tossed it in the backseat, then leaned against the car. “Wanna walk back to that same place for ice cream, or pick a better one since we’re at the car?”

After a couple of grunts and another hushed curse, Cas climbed back out of the car fully dressed. One look at a Dean had him wanting to go home that instant and take a cold shower, but again, he didn’t blame himself.  _ Construction has been very, very good for him. _ “Why don’t we go to the one down the road from our house? We’ve fulfilled the terms of the Pathokinesis date, so we can do whatever we want to now.”

“You got it. Get back in there, I’ll change when we get there.” Dean took off the belt and unbuttoned pants before climbing inside and turning the car on.

The sight was obscene. Dean, in that car, barely dressed?  _ Just… look away. I’m only even thinking about it because it’s been so long since I’ve gotten laid… unless that blow job in the bathroom at Mario’s counts.  _ He kept his eyes on the window as they made their way to the ice cream parlor, and when they arrived, the sun had finally started to set. “It shouldn’t be as hot now, do you think you could… I don’t know, put some clothes on?” Cas grinned at him and got out of the car before Dean could say another damned thing to make his mind wander. 

He heard Dean chuckle in the car and based on how it was moving, he was finally getting dressed. Dean climbed out as he shrugged on a shirt and zipped up his jeans. “Better?”

Cas nodded with his eyebrows raised, glancing around at all of the people staring at Dean. “Yes it is,  _ sweetheart. _ Now come over here so I can feed you ice cream.”

“Aww. Rubbin’ off on you, huh?” Dean walked up and put an arm around him as they walked inside. “What you in the mood for?”

_ ‘Rubbing off’ seems kind of close to what I’m in the mood for.  _ “Something simple. Cherry vanilla, maybe?” Cas leaned into his side and was surprised to find how well he fit there. “What are you in the mood for,  _ Al?” _

Dean huffed a laugh and took his arm off Cas. “Can I get some cherry vanilla for my hot date and I’ll take a... wait what’s that?”

The woman laughed and held out two snickerdoodle cookies. “You can pick any ice cream you want to go between them. Fresh baked this morning.”

“That... I want that.” Dean looked way too excited to eat that many calories.

The pet names were actually causing Cas to feel... things.  _ Given my major, I should be better at articulating whatever the hell this is. But somehow, camaraderie doesn’t seem to encompass it. _

They got their ice cream and went back outside to sit at one of the picnic tables. Cas had opted for a cone, and as usual, tried to shove the whole thing in his mouth to narrow the sides so it wouldn’t drip all over his fingers when it started to melt.

Dean stared with his mouth agape, frozen before he could take a bite out of his sugary concoction. “Like that, Cas?”

He licked his lips, keeping his expression innocent despite knowing exactly why Dean had that reaction. “No, I usually like to use my hands as well, but... that would be a giant mess here. And not the sort of mess I generally like.” He did it again, this time sliding his tongue out of his mouth to drag it up the side.

Dean pointedly looked down at his ice cream sandwich and licked his lips. “Be good to me, baby.” He took a huge bite and moaned, his eyes dramatically rolling back as he chewed.

_ Thank the gods I’m not still wearing that skirt. _ Cas shifted, resorting to eating his ice cream like a normal human being once satisfied it was under control. He glanced up, smiling when he saw the sky was clear. “It’s turning out to be a gorgeous night.”

“Mmhmm. Fall is almost here. What you wanna do for your birthday?” Dean took another bite and watched Cas. Normally Dean’s eyes wandered as they sat in a busy joint, but not this time. He really was committed to this fake dating.

“I haven’t thought much about it. Probably nothing, I don’t think my father will be home.” Cas caught some melting ice cream with his tongue and stared at the table. “He wants me to call Jimmy. Apparently, he’s getting married soon.”

“Married? Didn’t think that asshat would ever settle down. You wanna call him?”

Even the thought of talking to Jimmy made him uncomfortable, but he’d do just about anything for his father. “I don’t think I have much of a choice. My dad brought up how heartbroken our mother would be if she knew, and he’s right.”

“Well yeah, but... your happiness matters too, Cas. Don’t let anyone pressure you, but... if you want to, even a little, you should. I can be there if you want.”

He nodded slightly, wishing suddenly that they weren’t on opposite sides of the table. “I know my happiness matters too, but sometimes... sometimes it doesn’t. We don’t know what will happen, and maybe my father is right. Fighting with Jimmy is... silly.” He ate more of his cone to buy himself a couple of seconds and then added, “But yes. I would appreciate it if you were there, you know how angry he makes me.”

“Yeah, I’ll be there no problem. Don’t even gotta ask, Cas.” Dean squeezed his hand and went back to eating.

The atmosphere changed for Cas after that, as it always did when Jimmy was brought up. He laughed along with Dean as they finished their ice cream, and in a last-ditch effort to try and alleviate some of the weirdness that conversation brought on, Cas swiped his finger though the last little bit of ice cream in his cone and wiped it on Dean’s cheek. “I’m not sorry. Someone as hot as yourself must need cooled off every once in a while.”

Dean laughed and grabbed a napkin. “Are you trying to start a food fight here and get us kicked out? Cause... I’m down.”

“We don’t have much food left, but we can make as big of a mess as we want to in our own kitchen.” Cas raised a challenging eyebrow and stood up. “But loser has to clean.”

“Ugh. No fun. Let’s go home.” Dean stood up and bit the last of the cone out from Cas’ fingers. 

Sighing, Cas shook his head with a faint smile and headed back to the car. On the way home, Cas pulled out his phone and opened his notes. “So, tell me what worked for you and what didn’t, and how you think this one went.”

“Uh... the crop top was  _ not _ workin’, but it was still really fun. I actually wouldn’t mind another dress up date, that was my favorite part.”

“Which means you liked  _ my _ outfit, hm?” Cas grinned, jotting down what Dean said. “I had fun too, despite spending quite a bit of the initial part embarrassed. But then again, I’ve come to the conclusion that if you’re with the right people, just about anything can be fun.”

“Yup. I always have fun with you, Betty.” Dean poked his ribs and turned up the music.

The drive was short, and once they were back inside, Cas was wiped. Dean started heading for the stairs, but Cas held out a hand to stop him. “Hey, I um... thank you. For... everything. I know this wasn’t the easiest thing to agree to, and I’m quite positive this is the first time you’ve ever gone four dates without getting laid. And... for understanding about Jimmy, too. You truly are the best friend I’ve ever had.”

“Cas... I’d do anything for you. I mean that. And I get laid after every one... just alone.” He joked, probably to lighten the mood. “You don’t hear me, right?”

He absolutely did, but decided to be nice. “No, I usually only hear it when you’re actually having sex. You pick some... loud women.” Cas moved forward and wrapped his arms around Dean briefly, squeezing and pulling back. “Goodnight, Dean. Rest up, I’m sure tomorrow’s date will be equally ridiculous.”

“Well... I can’t wait.” Dean grinned and moved so Cas could walk up the steps first. “Night, sweetheart.”

As he laid in bed trying to fall asleep, he could feel the anxiety creeping in.  _ This is going to be one of those nights I have nightmares, I can feel it. Hopefully for Dean’s sake, I’m not as loud as his women. _


	8. On the Head of a Pin

**Dean**

Falling asleep took a while for Dean that night. He felt so bad for Cas, and knew that change in subject at the ice cream parlor practically ruined the date. It was like a dark cloud hovering above his best friend, and there was nothing Dean could do to help it. There never was.

He and Jimmy were practically inseparable before the accident. Dean and Jimmy never got along that well in high school, but Dean was always respectful for Cas’s sake. After, Jimmy changed, and he wasn’t there when Cas needed him the most. It made Dean want to punch him. But when Jimmy  _ wasn’t _ there, Dean  _ was, _ and he would always be there for Cas.

Their bond grew in the absence of his brother, and Dean struggled with feeling sorry about that. He couldn’t imagine where they would be if Cas never took that chance and opened up to Dean. It helped Dean feel needed, but in the end Jimmy was his brother, and if they got close again, Dean would be happy for Cas.

He slept like shit, and when he saw Cas downstairs in the morning, he could tell he did, too. “Mornin’ sunshine, made you coffee and now I’m makin’ french toast. Get comfy.” Dean nodded towards the dining chair and got to work. 

Cas smiled genuinely as he sat down, his hair ruffled like he’d tossed and turned a lot overnight. “I think you deserve a raise. Am I even paying you at all? If I’m not, I should be.”

“I think you pay enough when you put up with my shit, it’s fine.” Dean chuckled at how often he annoys Cas and kept cooking.

They were both quiet through the rest of breakfast, but it wasn’t a weird silence; it was the kind that let them both know things were okay. Cas nodded toward the book as he got up to start the dishes. “I’m in the mood to make an ass out of myself today, I hope the next one involves interrupting a live news broadcast to read love poems or something.”

“Yeah? Let’s do it!”  _ Anything get a smile outta you.  _ Dean got the book and then picked page twelve. “Alright, looks like we’re goin’ out.”

Cas came over to lean over his shoulder, pointing at the bottom one. “Let’s do this one, I’m not particularly in the mood to get wet today.”

Dean scratched it off and groaned when he saw how damn long the text was. “Ah shit... okay... ‘Your town is filled with hidden, sweet gems, and you now have the opportunity to discover these places in style. Use bicycles, roller skates, or skateboards. Go to two different farmer’s markets, and choose one of the following scenarios for each place, but be sure to do them both. One, feed each other strawberries using nothing but your mouths. Two, pick a Taylor Swift song and sing it while your partner tries to throw grapes into your mouth. You can only stop when you catch one.’” He scoffed, staring at it. “I don’t know any T-Swift songs.”  _ Lies. You loved that Trouble one, asshat. _

Cas blinked at him and opened his mouth to speak, but closed it quickly. Then did that about five more times. “It knows I was kidding when I said I wanted to embarrass myself, right?”

“Nope.” Dean grinned. “You weren’t kidding. Pick a song, Betty. Ima google tandem bikes. Might as well go all out.” 

Finding a bike rental place actually turned out to be easier than he thought it would be, and the nervous look on Cas’ face was adorable. “We said we’d do ‘em all, Cas. No backin’ out now.”

“I know, I know. At the end of the day, this is entirely my fault.” He climbed onto the backseat of the bike and grabbed the handlebars, and once Dean took the front, Cas sighed. “Okay. Which one of these scenarios are we doing first? Strawberries or grapes? Turn left up there, there’s a market not far from here.”

“Grapes?”  _ How the hell are we gonna feed each other strawberries without our mouths touchin’? _

They pulled up to the first farmers market, and a Dean was happy there was a proper place to lock up the bike. “Ready, darlin’?”

Cas cleared his throat and nodded, setting his helmet on his seat and trying to fix his hair. “Yes, about as ready as I’ll ever be for something like this. At least we don’t have to record it, I suppose.”

He greeted the little old lady and bought some grapes, turning to Dean afterward. “Me first?”

“Go ahead.” Dean waved a hand and grinned as he took the grapes. “Sing with your mouth wide, Swifty.”

He hesitated for a moment. “I miss the old pet names.” Cas clenched his fists at his sides and looked around, seeing a couple of people near them but not too many. “I only know one song well enough to actually do this, so… don’t judge me.” 

Dean threw a grape right at Cas’ forehead and it bounced off, and Cas went cross-eyed trying to look up. “Quit stallin’.”

“Fine.” Cas fixed his eyes on Dean’s hand and started singing, opening his mouth wider than necessary with every word. “But she wears short skirts, I wear T-shirts, she's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers. Dreamin' 'bout the day when you wake up and find that what you're looking for, has been here the whole time…” 

Dean’s laugh probably drew more attention than Cas’ low mumbling he called singing, but he started tossing grapes. He played around a few seconds and then started actually aiming for his mouth. “Woo! Look at my beautiful wife!” Dean called out, making a few more heads turn.

Cas faltered, blushing and missing every single one of them. “I’m not his - damnit, Dean.” He squatted down and started singing the chorus, and Dean tossed a grape straight into his mouth. Everyone clapped with him as he pulled Cas into a hug and kissed his forehead. “Good job, sweetheart.”

“It’s your turn.” Cas held tighter for a moment and then pulled back, smirking despite the redness still in his cheeks. “And now you’ve got an audience.”

“Ah, fuck. Move along people.” Dean huffed a laugh and rubbed the back of his neck. “Alright, shit uh...” he cleared his throat and sang loud.  _ Already makin’ an ass outta myself. Why not go all the way in?  _ “'Cause I knew you were trouble when you walked in so shame on me now. Flew me to places I'd never been...” Dean tried to catch a few grapes in his mouth but it seemed like Cas was missing on purpose. “Now I'm lyin' on the cold hard ground. Oh, oh! Trouble, trouble, trouble...

Oh, oh! Trouble, trouble, trouble.”

Cas laughed adorably hard and came over, popping a grape onto his tongue and touching his cheek. “You’re right, Dean. I  _ am _ trouble.”

_ Fuck... _ “I need a drink.” They waved off the crowd and held hands as they walked back towards their bike. Dean ignored the many phone cameras that were pointed their way and pulled Cas along.

“We could stop at a bar before we go to the next market. I think we could both use a few shots after that, but we need to hurry. Most farmer’s markets around here close by 5pm.” They got back on the bike and pedaled over to the bar, then raced to see who could down four shots of whiskey faster. Dean won by a landslide, but Cas powered through his and shuddered hard when he was done. “That was disgusting, but I absolutely feel better. Okay, let’s go.”

They got to the second farmer’s market just in time, and Dean grabbed a quart of strawberries and met Cas back at the bike, where he was leaning against the seat.

“Got ‘em. Alright...” Dean positioned in front of him and held out a strawberry close to their mouths. “I rinsed them already, do I hold it while we bite or is it absolutely no hands?”

Cas bit the very corner of his lip. “It said only our mouths, so here, you put the top in yours and I’ll... I’ll bite the bottom? It didn’t say how many, so I think we can get away with one each?”

“Deal.” Dean bit into it and leaned in for Cas to eat. He kept his eyes open, watching Cas as he parted his lips and took his first bite.

Of course there was still some left, so Cas swallowed and leaned in again kind of awkwardly, trying to find the best angle. Their faces ended up so close to each other as he bit the rest that Dean could feel his breath.

Dean bit off the last piece and set it aside. “Alright, my turn.”  _ Kinda wish we were doin’ more than one strawberry each now... Shit is hot. _

“Right.” Cas grabbed a strawberry and stared at it for a moment, then placed the top between his teeth and took a deep breath, nodding to Dean.

With a quick lick of his lips, Dean leaned in and took a bite. Normally, Dean would eat a strawberry whole, but not this time. He took slow, tentative bites as their bodies naturally moved closer together.

Cas gripped Dean’s shirt and made a noise so quiet Dean would’ve missed it if they weren’t so close, and when the tip of Dean’s nose brushed Cas’ cheek, the strawberry fell right out of his mouth. 

But before Dean’s brain could catch up, he was pressing their lips together softly. He nearly closed his eyes and pulled Cas in further, but instantly remembered this was  _ Cas. _ Dean pulled back quickly with a blush spreading across his nose. “M’sorry.”  _ Shit... why did I want more? Damn book is gettin’ to me. _ “Let’s go home.”

**Castiel**

He’d thought he was prepared for it. 

Thought he’d be able to handle it when they kissed, if they kissed, because they’d talked about it like adults beforehand. So why, then, was an accidental peck so… jarring? 

Cas cleared his throat and leaned against the arm of the couch while Dean fixed them a couple of nightcaps. “Do you… have anything to add? For the project, I mean.”  _ Not about the kiss that almost was and almost wasn’t.  _

He walked back and sat next to him with a sigh. “Uh... it was... interesting.” Dean looked down at the drink in his hand. “Make sure you add how good you sing Taylor Swift.”

_ And yet, now it’s awkward. He's never this… muted after a date, not even his normal bad ones.  _ “Would you have done anything differently on a real date?” Cas tilted his head, curious despite knowing the answer probably wouldn’t make him feel any better.  _ And… don’t look too closely at the fact that I haven’t asked this before.  _

“Uh...” Dean took a sip as he contemplated his answer. “No... I wouldn’t... would you?” His green eyes darted to the side and searched Cas’.

For a moment, he nearly lied.  _ I swore I’d be honest. _ “Yes, I would have. If you had been someone I was legitimately dating and not simply the greatest friend a human being could ask for, I think I would’ve done a few, small things differently.”

“Should we talk about those things?” Dean looked away and fidgeted with the glass in his hands.

“I would’ve kissed you, properly, when the strawberry fell. Hell, I’d have kissed you before then. It strikes me as though that date was designed precisely  _ for  _ that, and therefore... I suppose fighting the natural trajectory felt strange.” He pushed off from the couch, heading over to light one of the candles. “This was the first time during all of this that I remembered that what we’re doing is fake.”

Dean nodded and shot back his drink. “Alright well, next time... don’t fight it. We’re supposed to be in this with both feet, right? Now that you pointed it out, I forced myself to pull away because I didn’t want to upset you. We’ll just... do better. When’s our next date?”

_ I don’t even know what ‘do better’ means, anymore.  _ “Um… I’m not sure. I suppose it’s up to you, you know my class schedule nearly as well as I do.” Cas walked back over and sat next to him, feeling something heavy on his chest he didn’t quite understand. “It could be sometime this week, or we could wait until next weekend.”

“How about Tuesday or Wednesday? We can pick one that we stay home for.”

Cas thought about that for a moment and nodded. “Let’s do Tuesday? My classes on Wednesdays are easier, so it won’t matter to me if we’re awake a little later than normal. Obviously, you’ll still need to work, so we can scratch it right when you get home?”

“Sounds good. Or we can FaceTime and scratch it, that way if I need to stop at a store on the way I can get it done.” Dean finished his drink and stood. “That date was fun though, Cas. We might be on the internet again.”

The memory of them singing those horrible songs was way too fresh in Cas’ mind and he grimaced. “It really was fun, but I’d prefer  _ never  _ to see the video.” Cas grabbed his laptop and headed for the couch, realizing it was just about time for Dean to go to bed. “Though, I wish someone would’ve filmed the second part. I don’t think you’ve ever eaten anything so slowly in your life.” He smirked a little, hoping to take some of the weird edge off. 

Dean had the nerve to blush at that. “Shut up. I didn’t want to accidentally eat your face.” He tickled Cas’ thigh and stood up. “Night, Cas. Can’t wait for the next one.”

“Me too.” Cas silently watched Dean go, then pulled up his project notes.  _ Kissed Dean for the first time and all he could do was apologize for it, like he knew it shouldn’t have happened. How do I describe how that makes me feel when I don’t even know? _

~~~~

“You’re not allowed to ask me any questions about Dean until you tell me at least three things about your life.” Cas raised an eyebrow at Charlie, challenging him to defy her. 

“Ugh, fine.” Charlie rolled her eyes, “but this gives me free reign.” She took a second to think. “One, I went on three dates with the same girl. Things are... heating up. Two, I tried Greek food last night... not a fan. And three, I’m doing awesome in every class. There, three things. Your turn, spill.”

Cas huffed, knowing he wasn’t going to get much else out of her. “I expect to meet her soon, I could’ve told you that you won’t like Greek food, and good… I’m pleased to hear your classes are going well.” He took a bite of his salad, chewing intentionally slowly. 

She gave him a look before sighing. “Castiel Novak. I never pry... you tell me to shut up and I will. But you  _ want _ to talk about this. I see it. Let me be here for you.”

“He… kissed me. Sort of. Barely. And he immediately apologized, so… not really.” Cas dropped the other half of his fry and licked his lip, finally looking at her. “What the hell am I doing? Why did I think this was a good idea?”

“Why did he apologize? Was it completely out of the blue? I need more deets, babe.” She touched his hand. “Is it becoming too hard on your friendship?”

Cas shook his head, then explained the situation with the strawberries. At the end, he added, “And no, I don’t think it’s negatively affecting our friendship, though... things do feel... strange right now.”

“I’m glad it isn’t affected it negatively, but things with Dean have never been strange. You two together are... it’s crazy. The bond. It’s like almost visible, if that makes any sense. If you feel strange, I’m sure you guys can talk it out. How did the kiss feel... before he apologized?”

A visible bond sounded like an accurate description, which only made the answer weirder. “It didn’t feel like anything. Dean might as well have been kissing anyone else in the world. It lasted maybe a second and then he was gone, it was…” Cas took a deep breath and shook his head, exhaling hard.  _ There was no passion. Which is funny, because I thought I was going to burst into flame a second before that. But then again, maybe that was just from fear it would happen, and not excitement? _

Charlie actually looked sad a split second before she nodded. “Then talk it out or keep moving along. It’s probably just the situations the book is putting you guys in.”

“Yes, well... our version of talking it out ended with us agreeing to simply ‘do better next time,’ whatever that even means.” He kept eating, but decided to get the rest of his concerns out while he was at it. “That was only the fifth date. What’s going to happen in another twenty?”

“Shit, I forgot how many there were. Are you sure you want to do them all?” she asked, before taking a bite of her sandwich.

There were pros and cons to both sides, but Cas was too curious to stop. “It was one, very strange moment. I’m sure nothing like that will happen again. We’ll be fine… but… is it weird that I wanted to?”  _ There. I said it out loud.  _

“Not at all. I think it’s completely normal to wonder about our closest friends, not to mention a friend  _ that _ hot. You have eyes, you know he’s attractive. You have ears, you hear he is good in bed. It can be nothing more than curiosity... or it’s more and... eek.”

_ Eek  _ was right, but the rest of her explanation made sense. He laughed, relieved. “You’re absolutely right, it’s nothing more than… professional curiosity. Thank you, I think you just saved me a great deal of internal angst over this. I simply… want to know what it’s like.” 

“Glad to help. But, before you change the subject, you have to remember - it’s completely normal to think of your friend that way, it is  _ not _ normal to actually try it. Okay? Don’t cross that line.”

_ Well, that was a buzzkill. _ Cas frowned at her. “Whose side are you on, anyway?”

She laughed. “Yours, always.”

_ At this exact moment, I think going ‘there’ with Dean is very much in my best interest, but… then again, it’s likely just the book talking. Friends with benefits is rarely a situation that works out long term, no matter how close two people are when they begin.  _ “Fine, then stop asking about it like you’re asking for juicy gossip. If I’m not supposed to cross that line, there will be absolutely nothing interesting to report… Dean and I are just two people going through a bunch of mildly embarrassing dates.”

“That was very convincing, have you changed majors to acting?” She deadpanned, a small smile on her lips.

_ No, but apparently I’m regressing with the social skills.  _ Cas stood, gathering their trash to throw away. “I haven’t, but I wouldn’t be surprised if that ends up in the book somehow.” He came back over to grab his drink and sipped it slowly, eyeing her. “Are you done confusing me yet?”

“Yes. How about I tell you about Tiffany while we walk to class?”

Cas gestured for her to lead the way, fearing this was yet again, just another ploy to confuse him. She told him all about her, how they met, how far they’d gone - which, frankly wasn’t much further than the kiss he and Dean shared. But she was sure their next date would be the one.

They talked about her for as long as they could, and he hugged her tight as she said goodbye at the door to his next class. “I’m happy for you, Charlie. I hope she’s everything you deserve and more. Hells, if you need date ideas… let me know.” 

He smiled at her as she walked away and then let out a breath.  _ Maybe they’ll go better for you than they’re going for me.  _


	9. Live Free or Twi-Hard

**Dean**

Dean still didn't know what to think about that _kinda_ kiss. Was it even considered a kiss? The damn strawberry fell and Dean just... didn't stop in time. 

_If that is how Cas thinks I kiss, then he must think all those chicks are fakin' it too... shit! I shoulda rocked his damn world. Wait... what?_ He dropped the hammer he was using on his foot, and realized he had zoned out in the middle of work. _Thank fuck for steel-toed boots!_ Dean looked over to find Madison's brother Matt staring at him. "What? Got somethin' to say?" _Asshat. Dunno how you got a job here anyway, flower child._

Matt smiled a little bit and handed Dean a water. “Saw you dropped your hammer, just… making sure you’re okay. How long have you been working here?”

Dean rolled his eyes but took the water. _None of your damn business._ "Thanks, Mark. Been here since I could pick up a saw. Last name is Winchester, sound familiar?" _Friggin genius over here folks, damn company is called Winchester Building._

“Right, that makes sense. I... meant this particular development, though. You guys are doing a really nice job so far. I’m sorry I wasn’t clear.” He averted his eyes and spotted Sam several yards off. “I’ll see if he needs any help. My name is Matt, by the way. Not Mark. Common mistake.”

"Alright, Max, keep up the good work." Dean grabbed his hammer and got back to work, not feeling guilty at all... that is until Sam came over to intrude. "What is it, Sammy. Spit it out."

He told Matt to go grab some more nails and turned to Dean when he was gone. “What’s your deal? Was he being an ass?”

"Yeah." _No._ "Well, he looks like an ass, close enough." Dean started hammering again and laughed at Sam's bitch face. "What?" He tossed the hammer aside, knowing damn well Sam was going to say whatever he thought regardless.

“Are you still pissed at him for being interested in Cas?” Sam crossed his arms, looking condescending as hell like he already knew the answer. 

"What?! No. Look, he's basically Cas' ex." _Not even close._ "I can't like the dudes that didn't make the cut. He's my best friend." _Nice save._ Dean looked up and realized that wasn't a save at all. _Goddammit._

Sam shook his head. “You’re jealous, and it doesn’t look all that great on you.” He smacked Dean in the shoulder. “Tighten up, or you’ll just end up driving him right back to Cas. All it’ll take is one _‘hey, do you know why your roommate hates me?’_ text to set them back on the path to fucking in the room right next to yours.”

_Je... what?!_ "Jealous? Not jealous... Bitch." Dean grabbed his water so fast he spilled some, and then turned back to face Sam. "I don't care if they talk. Good for them. I just don't like his face." _Drop it, dammit!_

Nothing about his brother’s smug expression changed. “Have you kissed him yet?”

"Change your face too." Dean grabbed the hammer and then threw it down again. "What do you mean _yet_?"

Sam opened his mouth to speak and Dean cut him off again, "and why do you assume it will be me who kisses him? 'Have you kissed him yet?'" He mocked in a horrible Sam-like impression.

“So, you have. How was it?” Sam picked Dean’s hammer up for him and tucked it into his own toolbelt. “Bet it was good, I’m not even gay but I know Cas has some damn kissable lips.”

"Fuck off, Sam. It wasn't even a real kiss." _No,_ **_you_ ** _shut up, Dean!_

Sam nodded, grinning like he just won the lottery. “So that’s why you’re mad. He didn’t kiss you back.”

"No, I pulled-" Matt walked back over and Dean finally learned how to shut his mouth. "Back to work, slackers."

After work, Dean climbed in the car and took a moment to think about that conversation. He knew Sam was fucking with him, that wasn't a question. But why did all of it get to him so badly? He wasn't jealous. That wasn't what it was. It was... well, he didn't know; but he'd never felt whatever the hell _it_ was before. 

To keep from digging any deeper, Dean facetimed Cas. "Hey, darlin', let's get scratchin'."

Cas smiled at him and wrinkled his nose. “You’re dirty. Working hard today?”

"Yup. I smell amazing, in case you were wondering." Dean already started to feel better from five seconds of talking to Cas - not that he was thinking about that. "Today blew. Sam hired that beatnik dude you sexted that one time."

A short laugh escaped him. “I’m not entirely thrilled he told you about that, but... it is what it is.” He moved the camera away from his face as he walked over to get the Pathokinesis book.

Dean froze. _That was a fucking joke._ "Wait, wait... what? That really happened, Cas?"

“I was trying to get him to have a personality. It didn’t work.” Cas paused, and Dean could practically hear the wheels turning. “Wait, so he didn’t tell you?”

"No! Hardly spoke two words to the guy." _Whatever, I don't care._ "You got the book?" They needed to get back into safe territory before Dean asked questions he didn't want to know the answers to.

“Okay. Pick a page.” Cas cast it open as Dean picked fifteen. He flipped open the book to the page Dean requested and scratched off the bottom date, reading out loud. “‘Buy a cheap apron and wear nothing but that as you bake a pie. Turn on the movie Twilight, and every time Edward looks uncomfortable, be the first to wipe filling on the other person’s face. How you choose to get it off is your business.’” Cas frowned, staring at it. “They ended with a winky face, which tells me how _they_ think we should clean up.”

Dean huffed a laugh. “That damn movie. This book wants to kill us. Alright, that's straight forward enough. I'll grab some cheap aprons with cute print. We need anything for pie?"

“Maybe some extra filling? I don’t think we want to waste what we have covering each other when it should be going in the actual pie.” Cas turned the camera back to his face, and Dean wasn’t sure if it was the lighting or not, but he looked like he was blushing. “Do you think we can still wear boxers at least?”

"Yeah, we've messed with the rules before." _Plus, I'm not ready to see that perfect little ass._ "I'll grab some pie filling because we are definitely still making pie. Anything else? Need me to grab dinner?"

Cas nodded, looking relieved. “Sure. Chinese sound good?”

"Sounds good. See you in a bit." Dean ordered Chinese and made his way to the store. He normally liked to go home and get cleaned up before heading out into the public, but this would save them a lot of time so he wasn't complaining. 

Dean actually really enjoyed date night with Cas. He always hated dating, but dating your best friend was different. It was fun. 

He found an apron for Cas that had little bumblebees on it and knew he had to have it. There were a few other options, but the only other one that didn't look like it was from the '50's had rainbows and cupcakes on it. Dean shrugged and grabbed himself that one, already planning on wearing it when he grilled. Once he had finished all his errands and finally walked in, he was happy to be home. "Honey, I'm home! Can you get the food set up while I get clean?"

“Of course.” He took the bags and boxes from Dean, then carried them to the dining room. “I’ll wait for you.”

“Thanks, darlin’. No peeking at the aprons.” He kept that bag behind his back. “I wanna see your smile when you see it.” _Coulda worded that differently, but whatever._

Dean jogged upstairs and took a shower. Once he put on boxers and his apron, he made his way downstairs. “Alright, cover your eyes.”

It looked like Cas struggled a great deal with that when he saw Dean, but he nodded and squeezed his eyes shut. “Okay.”

“Tada!” Dean held out the bee apron with a huge smile. “You like it?”

Slowly, Cas opened one eye and then the other, both of them widening when he saw the bees. “Dean!” He snatched it from him, holding it to his chest. “I might not ever take it off, I hope you know that.” He was grinning so widely it almost hurt to look at, but Cas must’ve been really excited about that damn apron since he started stripping right then and there.

“Yeah, take it off.” Dean whistled and then walked around Cas for food. “Alright, so first, Chinese in our aprons. Then, we pie... and then we live free and twihard?”

It took Cas a moment to answer, and when Dean turned to find out why, the poor guy was struggling to get his apron tied behind his back. “Yes, that… maybe. If I can get the damned thing on.”

“Let me help you.” Dean walked over and gently grabbed the ties from Cas’ hands. “I got you, sweetheart. All you gotta do is ask.”

Dean could _see_ the goosebumps spreading up his back when his knuckles brushed the skin. Cas nodded a little, speaking quietly. “I know, Dean. That’s the whole reason we’re here, isn’t it? You’ve got me, when no one else does.”

“Always. No matter what.” Cas slowly turned around and met Dean’s eyes. He couldn’t pinpoint the emotions he was feeling in that moment, but it felt an awful lot like teenage butterflies. _C’mon, Dean. Get a grip._

Cas reached out, touching the corner of Dean’s apron near the top. “Snug. Either you got these out of the children’s section, or construction has been better to you than I thought.”

Dean chuckled and licked his lips. “They might be for kids... I just wanted to come home.” _Maybe we shoulda done nothin’ underneath._ The thought made Dean blush and turn away. _What is happening?_

**Castiel**

_There’s no way I survive this. Six dates in, I’m going to end up quitting._ Cas reached out to Dean, sensing something was already wrong with him, too. “Dean? Talk to me. What just happened?”

“I uh... kinda wanted to kiss you again. I know we said if it happened naturally to just let it happen… but I shouldn’t push it on you in a random moment. You look... fucking adorable. Let’s just eat and get to that pie filling and see where this date takes us.”

The things that happened in Cas’ chest were foreign and frankly unwelcome in their ferocity. He nodded, not wanting to push Dean either, especially not with Charlie’s words echoing in his head. _It’s normal to be curious, it’s not normal to do it._ “It’s okay, Dean. You’re not pushing me. You’re right, we’ve talked about this multiple times now, I think we’re on the same page.” He smiled at his best friend and sat down to eat, rushing through it a little more than he normally would. 

Dean seemed to be doing the same, and before he knew it, Cas was putting on the movie while Dean preheated the oven and started the pie crust. 

By the time Cas walked back, Dean already had flour all over the counter, on his cheek, and in his hair. “Alright, it wasn’t my fault, the bag... poofed when I opened it.”

He licked his lips slowly and brushed the white powder off Dean. “Do we have another bag?”

“Nope. But look, I saved some. That’s how it got in my hair. We have enough for the pies tonight.” Dean moved to show Cas the bottom of the bag. “See?”

All he could smell was Dean’s body wash, and he immediately forgot why he was staring into a half-empty bag of flour. “Um... yes?” He flicked his eyes up and then stood back, clearing his throat and grabbing the filling. “We have a couple of minutes before they get on screen, but... did you decide which flavor you want to bake and which one you wanted to use on each other?” _Why did that come out so casually?_

Dean bit his lip and giggled under his breath. “Cherry pie for us and berry for your skin. Cause Imma win... I just rhymed again. What is this book doin’ to me?”

“I don’t think you need to worry about turning into a poet, Dean,” he teased. He glanced at the TV when he heard Edward’s voice and waited, hurrying to open the can of berry filling. When the scene started of him smelling Bella for the first time in class, Cas dipped his fingers into the can and lunged at Dean, smearing it on his shoulder. He laughed at the flour covering him there, too. “If I put you into the oven, will you turn into a pie?”

Dean gripped Cas’ wrist and looked at the mess. “I’m not that sweet, sweetheart.” He pulled Cas back in. “How you gonna clean that off?”

The jolt that made its way down his body answered the question for him, but Cas stood his ground and quirked an eyebrow. “I was thinking I’d just leave it there, it’s a good color on you.”

“Mhmm.” Dean released him and got some filling for himself to prepare for the next Edward scene. The second they showed his face, Dean wiped it on Cas’ forehead. “He’s always uncomfortable.”

Cas dove in before Dean could make another move, licking a broad line over the filling on his shoulder. He carried on a little longer than necessary, closing his lips over the skin and pulling back. He glanced upward. “Are you going to make out with my forehead, Dean? Because _that_ will be uncomfortable.”

“Will it? Let me know.” He pulled Cas in until their bodies were flush and licked it off his forehead in multiple laps. “I’m tempted to leave you a hickey right here on your forehead just to make people look at you weird at school.”

Dean’s tongue on his skin - even something as unsexual as a forehead - was intense. He couldn’t speak for a moment. He just nodded dumbly and turned quickly, staring at the screen. He spotted a ridiculous expression on Edward’s face and decided to count it, but when he whirled back around to grab the filling, Dean had beaten him to it.

He acted fast, shoving his hand in the filling and then smooshing it on Cas’ chin and bottom lip. Dean was nearly on the ground laughing at whatever Cas’ face was doing from shock.

It took a great deal of effort not to dart his tongue out to lick it off himself. “Fix it. And also…” He used Dean’s distraction as an opportunity, smearing some more on Dean’s neck. 

“Ah, man.” He tried to duck away but just made a bigger mess along his jaw. “Alright, you first.” Dean bared his neck and did a come here motion. “You cheated, so you gotta lick first.”

The reality of the situation escaped him entirely. All he could see, or hear, or feel was Dean. He leaned in, licking a line up Dean’s neck and biting gently, caging him against the counter as he took his time sucking the filling off his skin.

The moan Dean released should have warned him for what was coming, but in hindsight _nothing_ could have prepared Cas for it. 

In seconds, Dean had them flipped and was licking feverishly along Cas’ chin towards his lips. He felt the ghost of Dean’s crotch rut against his seconds before Dean was sucking Cas’ bottom lip into his mouth.

Cas gripped Dean’s hips and held him close, pulling his lip back and letting out a breath. _Fuck it._ He kissed him again, digging his fingertips into Dean’s sides and pressing his tongue into that berry-flavored mouth, wondering how inappropriate it would be to spill the rest of the filling over Dean’s crotch. 

Dean sucked Cas’ tongue and then lapped back into his mouth, his hands sliding down to grip Cas’ sides as he pressed his entire body into Cas’, pinning him against the counter.

He could feel himself hardening and panicked, breaking the kiss and dropping his forehead to Dean’s shoulder. “I think…” _Just tell him. All I have to do is tell him I want more._ He shut his eyes, trying to get himself to focus. _More what? Confusion? Tension? Complications? Do. Not. Cross. The. Line._ “I think we need to get the pie in the oven.”

Cas could feel Dean’s chest rising and falling against his own and after what felt like an eternity, Dean took a step back. “Yeah... I think you’re right.”

The bulge behind Dean’s apron was almost the size of Cas’, but he’d seen Dean’s cock before and knew Dean was bigger. _I suppose I just got there a little quicker._ He cleared his throat, his hands shaking slightly as he prepared the pie. “Can you… um… handle it from here? I need to use the restroom.”

“Yeah, I’ll get it.” Dean cleared his throat and turned away, trying to hide as he palmed himself.

Cas raced up the stairs and into his bedroom, closing the door to his personal bathroom behind him. He sucked in a breath, hiking up his apron and stuffing the fabric into his mouth to muffle the sounds he knew he was going to be making. He shoved his boxers down with one hand, tucking the waistband under his balls and gripped his cock with the other. 

Thankful he kept lube in his shower, he squirted a line over his length and fucked into his fist, biting the apron hard enough he could feel it dampening between his teeth. _Fuck, gods damnit. How did this happen?_ He let his mind wander freely to how he felt pressed against that counter, caged by Dean, tasting him. _His hands on my skin... Oh, gods..._ He moved faster, squeezing and twisting his hand as he bucked his hips.

“Uhng,” he moaned louder than he meant to. _Shit, shut up. But fuck, it feels so good. He felt so good, tasted so... good. How would his come t-_

Cas nearly fell over with the force of his orgasm. He covered the toilet seat and grunted with the force of it, but didn’t bother trying to stop himself from wondering how much better _his_ come would look covering Dean’s face. 

_What is wrong with me? He’s my best friend. Fuck._ He looked down at his hand and the mess he made, grimacing to himself and cleaning up the best that he could before going back down to the kitchen. “What did I miss?”

Dean’s eyes traveled down to the wrinkled apron and mouth print at the bottom. He raised an eyebrow and bit his lip, devouring Cas with a knowing look. Cas could have sworn Dean’s pupils expanded, and he suddenly wanted nothing more than Dean fucking him against the counter after an orgasm - but Dean snapped out of it before either took another step forward. “Uh, nothin’. Pie is bakin’, and those two over here are still being awkward as fuck. But, they played baseball and now Bella is being hunted.”

He nodded, trying to keep his expression from betraying him. “Of course she is. Are we done, then, or are we going to finish out the movie per the terms of the date?” _Great. Go clinically proper._

“I think we more than filled our duties, Cas. Let’s talk about this one.” Dean walked closer, so close Cas could smell him. “How did you feel about this one? Is there anything you would have changed...” Dean ran a finger down his cheek, “sweetheart?” He pulled back then, and walked over to the couch to sit with a groan, his eyes still on Cas.

_Yes. I’d have just said ‘please’ so you’d rub your cock against mine until we were coming all over each other._ “I think I’m the one that’s supposed to be asking _you_ that question, but… this one was predictable.” _Pull it back._ “Taking into consideration the given scenario, it’s not surprising it ended up where it did, even for friends. As for things I’d have changed… no. I can’t honestly think of anything without lying.” _Or saying too much. What I wanted to happen wasn’t part of the date, and therefore isn’t relevant._ “What about you?”

“I loved every minute. Do you want to know what I would change?” Dean stood back up and walked toward Cas.

_Shit. Shit._ **_Shit._ ** Cas swallowed and nodded, bracing himself for whatever the hell was about to happen. “Tell me. Please.”

“I would have kept going. G’night, Cas.” Dean pecked his cheek and took the stairs two at a time, leaving a dumbfounded Cas behind. 

_Then why the hell did I stop?_

__

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot thank I_Am_The_Blue_Sunshine enough for the art. I still can't quite get over it.


	10. Dream a Little Dream of Me

**Dean**

_ Okay… what the fuck was that?!  _ Dean’s dick got harder with every damn step up the stairs and by the time he was closing his door, he couldn’t fucking take it. He shoved off the apron like it was offensive and pushed his boxers down, letting them fall to his ankles.

His lube was already on the nightstand, so he quickly slicked himself and started feverishly stroking his cock as he walked toward the shower. He still felt sticky from the pie filling residue, but there was no way he’d make it an entire shower without release.

Dean turned on the water and braced against the shower wall, his eyes closed as he imagined the exact scene downstairs. Only this time, Cas didn’t pull away. 

No, this time, Cas spread his legs for Dean, allowing him to lift him by his thighs as they rutted their hard, leaking cocks together. Even in his fantasy, they were too far gone to actually strip. 

He imagined dropping his mouth to Cas’ neck, sucking a mark while he shivered in Dean’s grip.  _ ‘Dean…’  _ imaginary Cas moaned, making Dean realize that if he never gets to hear  _ real  _ Cas moan his name, he might actually die. Dean turned to bite his own bicep as he moaned, anything to keep from calling Cas’ name. 

He was crossing lines that shouldn’t be crossed and he didn’t have the strength to stop it. Dean fucked into his own hand until his hips were faltering, and his eyes shot open just in time to watch himself empty all over the shower wall with a groan so loud there was no way Cas didn’t hear it. 

He imagined his come all over Cas’ face and shuddered with a pathetic whimper.  _ Fucking hell… This book is gonna kill us! _

By the time Dean had begun drifting off to sleep, his cock was nearly fully erect again.  _ Shut up and go to sleep, Seger.  _ He rolled onto his belly and counted sheep until he finally succumbed to his exhaustion. 

But his dreams gave him no mercy.  _ This  _ imaginary Cas was even more down than the last. This Cas shoved their boxers off and tossed their aprons aside, turning around for Dean and begging for his cock. Thanks to dreamland, lube wasn’t required and Dean sank into that perfect ass with a moan. Even his subconscious knew real Cas’ ass would be better and that fact alone had Dean jerking awake at 3am.  _ Son-of-a-bitch! _

Little Seger was putting a damn hole in the mattress, it was borderline excruciating how hard his cock was. Dean begrudgingly rolled on his back and started stroking himself again. He called back to the dream, his chest aching as it already began slipping from his memory.  _ C’mon, Cas… tell me you want it, too.  _ Dean managed to keep his mouth shut, but his inner monologue was practically screaming for Cas. 

_ Tell me you need it. Tell me you need my cock buried inside your perky little ass. Tell me you thought about this since the day we met. Tell me you want to swall- “Uunnggh!”  _ Dean caught most of his come in his fist except the rogue droplets leaking out between his fingers. 

“Fuck…” He got up, walking to clean up in a daze, and before he even realized, he was going downstairs for pie. “Friggin deserve some damn pie. Not like m’gettin’ anymore sleep.” 

He warmed up a huge slice and sat at the kitchen table, wondering how the hell they got here.

~~~~

After work the next day, Dean walked straight over to Jask’s house instead of his own. 

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to be home, he did. He already missed Cas and wanted to ask how his day was. But he was so goddamn confused he needed to talk to  _ someone  _ about it… and  _ not  _ Sam.

_ Knock knock. _

Ares opened the door and looked down at his dirty outfit with his eyebrows raised. “Um…”

“Yeah, I know I stink. Is J here? I won’t come in.”

Ares eyed him a second and moved aside. “You can come in, but shoes off and you guys can go on the back patio so you can sit. I’ll bring you beers, I can tell you need it.”

_ Whatever that means… _

Dean complied, and while he waited for Jask to join him, he suddenly got the urge to make a break for it.  _ Why am I here? What is he gonna do to help the situation? I need to talk to Cas about it all. No… I need to bury all this shit in a box and forget it exists before I ruin the best thing that has ever happened to me. _

“D… you okay?” J walked out and sat, handing Dean a beer.

“M’fine…”  _ Totally fine. Don’t I walk over here like a lost puppy every Wednesday? The fuck am I doing?! _

“Right.” Jask sat back and sipped his beer, his eyes on Dean. 

_ He isn’t gonna push. Grow some balls or kick rocks, Dean. _

“Alright, fine. I’m  _ not  _ fine. Cas and I kissed yesterday.” J choked on the sip of beer he was drinking but before he could talk, Dean spilled. He spilled every single fucking detail - down to his two  _ very  _ vivid jack off scenes last night. “What the hell do I do, J?”

Jask sat up a little straighter in his seat and leaned forward, watching Dean. “Okay. That’s… hell, I’m not surprised, but… D, you sure you’re not just… y’know.  _ Horny?” _

“Fuck yeah, I’m horny. Like all the fucking time, but I’m not horny for just anyone... I want Cas. It’s this damn book, J. It’s fuckin’ with us.” Dean scratched his head impatiently.

Nodding, Jask let out a breath. “Yeah. You just said it yourself, it’s the book. You don’t  _ actually _ want Cas. You guys have been friends for years, have you ever thought about him like this before?”

“Well yeah... sometimes.” He blushed slightly. “How could I not though, really? Sometimes I let my mind wander, and those pink lips subconsciously wrap around my dick.”

Jask laughed. “Guess that was a dumb question, I’m pretty sure everyone has fantasized about that little nerd sucking them off at some point.”

Dean frowned, jealously coursing through his body before he shook it off.  _ The fuck is going on? _ “I’ve thought of Ares, too, so it’s fine.” He winked and clicked his tongue, trying to fuck with Jask.

“And we’ve both thought of  _ you.  _ Now do you see my point? You can be attracted to someone, or curious about what they look like with a mouthful of cock, without wanting to get married.” He paused, tilting his head. “Did he seem to be as into it as you were?”

Dean thought back to that moment and he knew for a fact that Cas was... but he pulled back. “Yeah, but he was the one that stopped it.”  _ Do I wanna marry Cas? Who the hell knows... but I know I don’t want him to marry anyone else. Oh god, now I’m just a selfish asshole. _ He polished off his beer and set it aside.

“Maybe he had the same... misgivings that you do. All I’m sayin’, D... is that you shouldn’t be making decisions with your heart during a project designed to mess with it. If you wanna fuck him, fuck him. But don’t go spouting off at the mouth about being in love with him unless you’re damn sure you actually are and it’s not just some psychological induced bullshit thanks to your little experiment. Make sense?”

“Yeah... makes sense. So... keep my mouth shut until I know for sure... but we can fuck.” He stood up, feeling better. “I can do that. Sex without words is like... my way of life.”

Jask sighed, looking at Dean like he was missing some kind of grand lesson. “Good. Now, go get your nerd. I’m gonna get back to my own, cause  _ I’m _ the horny one now.”

“Wait...” Dean grinned with an amused glint in his eye. “You really thought about me? What was I doin’?”

He stood, smirking. “You really wanna know? It’s usually a team effort. Ares fucks your pretty little ass, and I fuck that agitatingly perfect mouth of yours.”

_ Well fuck me runnin’, I’m down as fuck… No... no, project. Cas. Pull it together. _ “Am I any good?” He chewed his lip and wiggled his eyebrows.

Jask nodded, letting his eyes travel down Dean’s body. “Yep. Best we’ve ever had... Though, I think I like you just as much on your knees.”

“Yeah, I bet you do.” Dean walked back inside and winked at Ares with a knowing grin. 

He frowned with the most confused look Dean had ever seen on his pretty face and then looked at his boyfriend. “I think your friend is broken.”

“Nah, finally told him about that joint fantasy. Trying to prove a point that you can be attracted to someone without being in love, but I’m pretty sure all I did was fuel his ego.”

Dean laughed as he put his dirty boots back on. “Hey, you two know my number. All you gotta do is call, and I’m here.” 

Ares’ blush was almost as cute as Cas’ and it made Dean realize that even as he imagined being their middle, he still couldn’t shake his thoughts of Cas.

“We’re absolutely going to consider that, but for now, gotta go.” Jask pulled Ares up from the couch and toward the stairs. “Unless you’re willing to join right this second, see yourself out, D. I’m so fuckin’ hard I could split rocks.”

“Welcome to my world. But I don’t have a damn boyfriend I can sink inside of every time I need it. Just my poor, abused palm.” He fake pouted and opened their door. “Thanks for talkin’ to me, J. Enjoy the sex.”

Jask winked and disappeared up the stairs, with Ares yelling back down, “You kind of do, though!” before the bedroom door slammed.

_ Kinda do? You mean my best friend that was able to pull away from the most passion I’ve ever friggin felt? Yeah, I got it made. _ He walked back home slowly, thinking about everything they just spoke about and when he walked inside, he was still just extremely horny and stupidly confused.

**Castiel**

Dean walked in, dirty and looking like he’d just seen a ghost. Cas felt strange, still not able to reconcile how their first kiss felt like kissing a family member and their second felt like it would set him on fire. “Hello, Dean.” 

“Hey, Cas.” Dean took off his boots and then started on his dusty pants. “How’s it goin’?”

_ Apparently better than you.  _ “Just working on a paper. Are you alright?” Cas pushed his laptop off his knees and stood, making his way over. “Did something happen at work today?”

“Nah. M’fine. Let me just get clean and I’ll be right back.” He darted up the stairs like his pants were on fire and Cas heard the shower turn on a moment later.

Cas closed his eyes and sank down into a dining room chair.  _ Great. I should’ve pulled back earlier, now he can barely fucking look at me. _ He glanced at the Pathokinesis book like it was his mortal enemy.  _ This is your fault. _

His shower took longer than normal, but he eventually came down and sat on the couch next to Cas with a groan. “One of those dates should be a couples massage, my body hurts.”

“We don’t technically need a date for you to go get a massage, Dean. I think you’ve earned one.”  _ Not that anyone else has earned the right to put their hands on you, but... _ He studied Dean, tapping absentmindedly on the table. “I could do it.”

Dean glanced over with an eyebrow raised. “Yeah?” His eyes glanced down at Cas’ hands and he could have sworn he heard the quick intake of breath. “I can give you one, too.”

_ Why, so I can subsequently have a heart attack?  _ “Would you be more comfortable on the floor here, or in one of the beds?”

“Floor, actually. You sure? Don’t wanna interrupt your homework, Cas.” His hands slid up and down his own thighs absentmindedly, almost as if he was nervous.

“Of course. How about I throw something in the oven and we can eat after?”  _ Nothing like food to give us a reason to stop. _ Cas headed for the refrigerator and pulled out some ingredients, suddenly afraid Dean would change his mind.

When he came back, Dean was already sprawled out on the floor with Rory Gallagher filling the silence. He was staring up at the ceiling in deep thought before he realized Cas was walking back.

Cas cleared his throat quietly and motioned for Dean to roll over, then smiled slightly. “Unless, you want me to massage your chest.”

“Tempting.” Dean rolled over with a grunt and got comfy. “Climb on, sweetheart.”

His nerves felt like live wires as he straddled Dean’s ass, noting every hot, flushed inch where his thighs pressed against Dean’s chiseled body.  _ Fuck. I want this on both sides...  _ He shuddered, lightly trailing his fingers up Dean’s spine and then beginning to properly massage him. 

Every time Dean squirmed or moaned, Cas’ cock threatened to make things extremely difficult. He lost track of how long he let his hands explore Dean, the dip of his lower back, the sharp edges of his hips rounded off only by pure muscle, but eventually, the oven timer dinged. 

Cas jerked like he’d been shot, snapping out of the fantasy world he’d built for himself. Sliding off, Cas couldn’t resist bending over to kiss the spot between Dean’s shoulder blades. “There, it’s been given the official Novak seal. You should feel better, especially once you get some food in your stomach. Come on.” He stood, holding out his hand to help Dean up.

“Uh... gimme a minute. That was so good I can’t move. I think I died and went to heaven.”

It would take an idiot not to notice the way Dean was canting his hips away from the ground, like he was trying not to smash something. He smiled to himself, satisfied that his hands had done their job in more ways than one. “I’ll get it dished up, you just...  _ come along _ when you’re ready.” 

He turned on his heel and did exactly that, letting the smell of lasagna waft through the house and coax Dean off the floor.

Dean made his way into the kitchen still at half mast in his sweats. Cas couldn’t help but stare and had to painfully peel his eyes away. “Smells amazing, wife.” Dean walked over to the fridge to grab them both drinks.

_ If I was anything close to your wife, that massage would have had a much happier ending. _ He simply nodded, staying quiet while they ate until they were both nearly finished. “When are you free for our next date?”

“What’s today? Wednesday? Uh... wanna do another inside one tomorrow then a big one on Saturday?”

He’d do one every day if Dean would allow it, so he nodded. “That sounds good. Should we make Saturday’s one of the ones we have to plan? We could scratch it off when we finish the one tomorrow.”

“Yeah, that sounds fun.” Dean smiled and stood up. “I’m cleaning the kitchen. Go relax, babe. My back feels better. Thanks for that massage, Cas.”

Cas allowed himself a moment of disappointment and stood up, taking his dishes to the sink for Dean. As he walked past, he trailed his fingers down Dean’s arm and tried to make it seem nonchalant, but wasn’t sure he pulled it off. “I’ll see you tomorrow, then.”

“Yup.” Dean leaned in, placing a chaste kiss on his head and went back to cleaning. 

~~~~

The following night, Dean got showered quickly and met Cas downstairs. They chose an entry that stated it could be done quickly and for free, which were two criteria they were both very on board with. Cas scratched it off and blinked at the page, dread pooling in his gut. “What the hell is the ‘5 Love Languages’ quiz?”

“The five what?” Dean turned the book to check it out. “What’s a love language?”

“The last time I checked, the romance languages were Spanish, Portuguese, French, Italian, and Romanian. I speak two of those, and highly doubt this quiz has anything to do with them. However, it seems we need to take the quiz and then advise each other how we can be loved in our own specific language. Then, write the answers down and put the paper on our bathroom mirrors.” Cas swallowed, knowing that was a recipe for disaster.

“Alright, is it online or in that book?” Dean got up and went to fetch their notepad from the kitchen drawer.

He flipped quickly through the book and found nothing. “It must be on the internet... hold on.” Cas fished his phone out of his pocket and searched the phrase on Google, coming up almost instantly with the quiz. “It’s the first result in a Google search.”

“Well, let’s do the damn thing.” He held out his hand. “Or do we take it on our own phones and then like... compare results?”

As if Cas knew anything about it. He should, given his major, but this particular quiz had escaped his notice. “I think we take it on our own, then I’ll need to tell you my results and vice versa.”

“Alright... five... love... languages...” Dean never noticed when he talked to himself, but Cas always thought it was cute.

He focused his attention on his own quiz and his blush deepened with every question.  _ Why are they focusing so much on gifts? If you’re relying on physical possessions, it’s not a very effective relationship.  _ Cas kept clicking, and got his answer too soon for his liking. He read over it and considered retaking it, knowing how it would be received and  _ not  _ knowing how the hell to proceed once he said it out loud. 

Dean took much longer. When he finished, he glanced up and caught Cas’ eyes on him, making them both blush. “Uh... m’done... I got physical touch.”

A grin spread across Cas’ face and he handed Dean his phone. “That makes me feel better, because so did I.”

They swapped phones and looked at their probably too similar results but noticed the biggest difference was how much more Dean liked words of affirmation. 

Dean slid the phone back with a grin and licked his lips before speaking. “So... does this project count as acts of service for you, Cas?”

“Yes, it does. A lot of things that you do for me count, Dean. You frequently make my life easier.” He huffed at the screen, then pocketed his phone. “I suppose I look for that in all of my relationships. Now, it said we need to tell each other how to love us in our own language, but... we obviously don’t need to do that.”

“Yeah, we have to. We’re doin’ this... all the way. I’ll start. I have a few things I like but most are inappropriate, so, I like back rubs, which you’re amazing at, and... um... cuddling.” He mumbled and rubbed the back of his neck.

_ Dean’s a cuddler... This shouldn’t be surprising information, and yet...  _ Cas allowed himself a singular moment to imagine what it would be like to be pressed against Dean’s body, then couldn’t help but ask, “Big spoon or little spoon?”

His face answered the question before he said “both,” but his eyes told Cas he liked being the little spoon just a little bit more.

“Right.”  _ Okay, Dean said his. Be a man about it.  _ “I… like to have my hair played with. It’s incredibly soothing. And… holding hands.” Cas was desperate to change the subject, especially when Dean started writing something down. “Tell me your inappropriate ones,” he blurted. 

“You sure?” He chuckled. “Come lay in my lap so I can play with your hair, and I’ll tell you three more.”

Cas was glad he didn’t have anything in his hands, because he’d have dropped it.  _ We’re technically still on the date. Anything that happens here... doesn’t count. _ He walked over slowly and laid down on his stomach, thinking ahead far enough to know it was best that Dean wouldn’t be able to see his crotch. He rested his head on Dean’s knee and tried to angle so it wouldn’t be quite as sexual, but realized pretty quickly that wasn’t exactly an option.

“Alright... uh... I like random touches. I know I said back rubs, but I also really love... butt rubs and like random ass grabs and shit... I dunno. I uh... love when my partner grabs my dick. Not even just in a sexual way but just random grabs, letting me know they want me. And another one...” He hesitated a minute while his fingers ran through Cas’ hair gently. “Cockwaming, finger sucking, random bites in passing. I’m getting off course, sorry. I just love touch... in every way.”

Trying to remain subtle while clenching his thighs together and forcing himself to breathe was hard. Cas was painfully, ridiculously aware of how good Dean’s hands felt on his scalp and how close his mouth was to Dean’s cock.  _ It would be so easy to just… shift a little… no.  _ Cas laughed quietly, gently biting Dean’s thigh just to tease him. “I’ll keep that in mind.”


	11. Out of the Darkness, Into the Fire

**Dean**

This was much more intimate than Dean expected it to be, but he was actually enjoying it. He tried to think of a time where he just sat with any of his girlfriends and talked this way…  _ never. _

He never had someone he thought cared enough to even tell these things to. No one had ever asked. The thought made him almost sad. He may have never been in love, but he’d had a few girlfriends along the way and he didn’t have remotely the connection with them that he had with Cas. 

With them, it was mostly sex, and here... it was everything else. 

He realized he was quiet for much too long, and cleared his throat. “You fallin’ asleep, Cas?”

“Mhm,” Cas hummed, nuzzling his head against Dean’s thigh. “Does this also count as cuddling?”

“It does. It’s nice.” Dean looked down and watched Cas’ face. He looked so relaxed it made Dean want to carry him upstairs and put him to bed. “So on this Post-It... maybe you just put the back rubs and cuddles. Probably don’t want to read my dirty kinks every morning while you brush your teeth.”

Cas huffed a laugh but kept his eyes closed. “I don’t think any of those really count as kinky, Dean. Except maybe cockwarming.”

“Yeah... I have more self control than I thought.”  _ Almost made a full goddamn list for you, not that it would do any good. This is just for a damn school project. I should change the subject. _ “Is facefucking and choking a kink? Asking for a friend.”  _ Just made it worse, great. _

A soft, nearly inaudible moan escaped Cas. “Yes. And now I have to move, so… thank you for that.” He groaned and pushed himself off the couch, a definite tent in his sweatpants. “Maybe this is our cue to scratch off the next date, before I end up on my knees just to see how good you actually are at facefucking.” 

Dean’s entire body shuddered and it took every ounce of his strength not to go for it.  _ Why not? Friends facefuck each other... right? Goddamnit. _ “Yeah, uh... probably a good idea.” He leaned forward and discreetly adjusted his rapidly chubbing boner and braced his elbows on his knees.

“We said we’d do better, didn’t we? That we’d stop fighting the natural progression of these dates?” Cas slowly dropped to his knees in front of Dean. “If you were anyone else, I wouldn’t even have waited this long. We’re all in, right? So, show me, Dean. Make me fucking choke on it.”

Dean’s eyes widened and he instantly sat back with his hands out, like one small wrong movement would wake him from this dream. “S-seriously?” His dick was fully on board, tenting his sweats and practically showing Cas exactly what he was working with.

“If you don’t want it, tell me now and I’ll go scratch off the next date. We can forget I even offered.” Cas’ face was flushed and his eyes were glued to Dean’s crotch. “But yes, the offer is serious.”

Dean’s head nodded before he even gave it a second thought. “Y-yeah, I want it. Wanted it for a while, Cas.”  _ Fucking please, before I beg. _

He reached forward, palming over Dean’s length then gripping his waistband on both sides. Dean lifted his hips as Cas pulled his sweatpants all the way down to his ankles, and watched as Cas’ pupils blew. He wrapped a broad hand around Dean’s exposed cock and stroked once, flicking his eyes up to meet Dean’s before leaning down and flicking his tongue over the tip.

_ Oh fuck, I’m gonna die. _ “Cas... fuck...” Dean gripped the couch, fighting the urge to instantly facefuck Cas until he was spilling down his throat, but he wanted to take this slower. If this was the only time they ever crossed this line, he had to cherish every single second.

He moved slowly, taking Dean in further and humming as his mouth stretched to accommodate the girth. He scooted closer on his knees, angling his head and pulling back up until he had enough room to stroke at the same time.

Dean groaned, his hips lifting off the couch as his hands shot to Cas’ head. “Fuck... that mouth. Knew it would be... fucking perfect. Ah, shit.” Dean couldn’t take it anymore, facefucking or not, he wasn’t going to last long. He gripped Cas’ hair tightly and started thrusting into his mouth, his bottom lip between his teeth.

Cas instantly went slack, moving his hand up to close around Dean’s throat as he drove himself deeper.

It was better than he ever imagined. Cas absolutely knew what he was doing, and Dean had never facefucked someone so... perfectly pliant. 

He couldn’t speak, not with words, so he slowly fucked as deep as he could, feeling Cas’ beautiful mouth on every inch of his length.

Cas squeezed his hand a little tighter and gagged slightly, but instead of pulling off, he shoved his face against Dean’s pelvis and swallowed around him. 

Dean’s hips lost their rhythm as his airway was cut off by Cas’ giant hand. He was close, much too close, but he didn’t want it to stop.  _ Oh god... please don’t... fucki- _ Dean came with a loud, frustrated groan as he buried himself in Cas’ throat.

Swallowing every damn drop, Cas pulled back with tears in the corner of his eyes and spit coating his chin. He lapped over Dean’s slick length and sucked just the tip like he was trying to get even more. 

“Goddamn, sweetheart. I...” Dean stood to shrug off his shirt, shove down Cas’ pants, and pull him onto his lap, slamming their mouths together. Yeah, he couldn’t find actual words, but he hoped he could show Cas how perfect that blowjob was.

Cas quickly met the kiss and settled on Dean’s lap, wrapping his hands around the back of Dean’s head and tugging on his hair.

Dean moaned at the flavor of himself on Cas’ tongue. He reached in between them and gripped Cas’ cock, stroking him feverishly while lapping into his mouth.  _ C’mon baby... come all over my fucking chest.  _

He was leaking precome everywhere, jerking his hips and moaning into Dean’s mouth. Nearly as fast as Dean, Cas threw his head back and gasped as he came, spurting not only on Dean’s chest, but his hand, stomach, and the back of the friggin couch too, pulling Dean’s hair so hard it almost hurt. 

Dean stroked him through it, his own heavy cock twitching at how damn hot Cas looked while coming. He didn’t moan his name... but Dean hoped next time he could have Cas calling his name like a damn prayer, because next time, he wouldn’t be using his hand.

Cas slowly looked down, meeting Dean’s gaze before focusing on the mess he made on Dean’s skin. He ran a couple of fingers through it and brought them to Dean’s lips. “Suck. Show me what I just missed.”

Dean opened his mouth and flicked his tongue, diving in to suck every drop off Cas’ long, thick digits. His eyes fluttered closed, relishing the flavor of his best friend for the first time.

“Fucking hells.” Cas slid his fingers out, his breathing ragged. “How are you real? I’ve known you for years, lived with you for years... How are you  _ real?” _

“I could ask you the same, Cas.” He met Cas’ eyes and leaned in for a soft, slow kiss. He didn’t know why he did it, but he couldn’t help it.

Carefully, Cas broke the kiss and climbed off him, grimacing at the wet spot on the couch cushion. “Whoops. I’m going to get a towel... Do you want to take a shower before we discuss this and scratch off Saturday’s date?”

Dean looked down at his chest and huffed a laugh. He brought some to his mouth with his thumb and eyed Cas. “Yeah, I’ll be right back.” He grabbed his clothes and walked upstairs naked, wondering if he was dreaming.

_ Tasted real. _

He took another quick shower and threw on his clothes before heading downstairs, where Cas was sitting on the dining room table back in his sweatpants. “We wanted one we had to plan, so I narrowed it down to a couple of them. Come pick one.”

Dean walked over and leaned over his shoulder to look. Cas still smelled like sex, and the reality hit Dean all at once. Cas didn’t just smell like sex, he smelled like sex with  _ Dean. _ _ Holy fuck... What did I just do? Did I take advantage of my best friend? Did I just- _

“Dean?” Cas interrupted his internal struggle and snapped his attention back to what they were doing. 

“M’sorry, uh that one.” He read what he picked after the fact and saw the word ‘candle’.  _ If this is fucking wax play, I’m going to die. _

He scratched it off quickly and held the book closer to his face to read it in the low light. “It looks like we need to pick the perfect candle… whatever that even means, then take it out with us on a rowboating trip, placing it on the seat between us. Then, we each take one oar and work together to keep the boat as steady as possible so the candle doesn’t topple out.” Cas frowned, looking up at Dean. “Wouldn’t the water put the flame out?”

“Maybe.” Dean stood and walked over to the fridge. “I think that’s what makes it a challenge, though. This is gonna be harder than furniture and forces people to talk shit out.”

“I suppose we should’ve known it wouldn’t be sunshine and rainbows forever, hm? I can’t decide if this book wants us embarrassed, angry, or pregnant.” Cas tilted his head and then flipped the book closed, tucking it away. “I’ll look for a suitable candle over the next couple of days. Do you know any bodies of water where they offer boat rentals?”

“I’ll take care of that part, you take care of the candle and the picnic we’re gonna have on the water.” He smiled and shoved some cold leftovers in his mouth.

Cas nodded once, looking like the wheels were already turning. “It’s a date.”

Dean ate quickly and then went back to the couch. He tried not to think about the things they just did on that couch, and focused on the tv. 

Cas joined him soon after and things were quickly back to normal. They stayed up late watching some murder documentary, and by the time Dean laid down for bed, he couldn’t even remember why he was worried. It was Cas.

**Castiel**

Somehow, they’d gotten out of talking about the last date. He’d had every intention to, but the look on Dean’s face when he came back down from his shower had told him that talking about it wouldn’t be a great idea. So, he’d jotted down his own notes and promised himself he’d get Dean’s view… later. 

None of that had been planned, but Cas couldn’t bring himself to regret it. That orgasm felt  _ incredible,  _ and Dean losing control and coming down his throat was arguably one of the hottest things he’d ever seen.  _ It just… is what it is. He’s insanely attractive and we’re simply following directions… mostly.  _

He’d found a candle easily enough, choosing a heavy, wide one that wasn’t very tall in the hopes it would be sturdier.  _ I don’t ‘sport’, this entire endeavor is going to be a disaster… but at least it’ll be a disaster with Dean.  _

The food was easy enough to figure out. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and pie. Cas knew they’d end up getting real food somewhere anyway, so he wasn’t worried about it being overly filling. He tossed a couple of bottles of water and a bottle of whiskey into the cooler, then shut it tight, yelling upstairs to Dean. “I’m ready!”

Dean walked down in a red plaid button up and some dark wash jeans. “Let’s do it, sugar lips.” He leaned in and kissed Cas’ temple as he passed to open the front door.

_ Sit.  _ He stared at his stomach, hoping the very unwelcome butterflies would hear him and calm down. Cas followed Dean out with the cooler and put it in the backseat before getting in. “How far away do we have to go?”

“Like, twenty minutes. Pick a tape.” Dean started the car and drove with a huge smile. Cas plucked a Beatles compilation out and pushed it in, raising an eyebrow at Dean, half expecting him to argue. Dean side-glanced at him and licked his lips as he shook his head. “Alright, Lennon, let’s hear it.” He turned it up and started singing along.

Cas quietly sang along but would much rather listen to Dean sing, and he was actually a little disappointed when the car came to a stop and Dean parked. It was a beautiful place, and Cas couldn’t shake how… romantic the date was about to be.  _ A candlelit picnic on the water? How could it not be?  _ “Do we have to go talk to someone about the boat first, or should I bring the cooler?”

“I’ll carry it, we do gotta talk to someone first but he knows we’re comin’. I already called ahead.” Dean got out and grabbed the cooler. “Let’s go, sweetheart.”

They introduced themselves and were escorted to the boat, then given life jackets and a quick tutorial that Cas could tell Dean didn’t listen to at all. Cas rolled his eyes with a smile and accepted Dean’s help climbing into the boat once the man walked away. He helped lower the cooler into the boat, and then fished out the candle as Dean pushed off and got in. 

He sat down so hard the boat jerked and his eyes widened in fear. “Shit... this rocks way too easy.” Dean glanced down at the water and then back at Cas, who had barely managed to stay steady. 

“Just… be careful. Give me your lighter.” Cas held out his hand, and Dean looked around nervously. 

“Uh... sure... let me just, grab that from dresser... at home.” He did that annoyingly adorable toothless smile that Cas adored, but found irritating in the moment. 

“Seriously, Dean? You carry that lighter every  _ single  _ day… except for the one day you know we’re going to need to light a fire?” He dug around in the bottom of the cooler for the first aid kit, hoping there were still matches in there. It took him several seconds to get one lit, but he finally did, then set the candle carefully on the seat between them. “Okay. We need to row at the same time, and gently, or this will be horrible.”

“Grab an oar, Cas. I think you gotta do that side at the same time as me but not too fast. We gotta find a pace.”

He blinked. “That’s… that’s what I just said.” Cas wrapped his hands around his oar and carefully dug it into the riverbed to push them further away, then spread his legs. “Why didn’t we put the life jackets on?”

“Cause they’re stupid. You can swim right?” Dean started rowing faster than Cas and reached out. “Just let me do it.”

Cas swatted Dean’s hand and watched the candle slide a couple of inches but stay upright. “The whole point is we’re supposed to do it together, Dean, slow down!”

“Fine.” He slowed down and grumbled something under his breath.

_ Seriously? _ Cas glanced behind them at where they were heading, but the movement made the boat tilt. “Shit, sorry...” He righted himself and Dean went to grab the candle before it fell.

“Imagine if this was one of those damn ‘don’t crack the egg’ situations. We’d be fucked.”

“If it were one of those, you’d have already cracked the egg on purpose to make a pie,” Cas muttered. He focused on the movement of the water and trying to match Dean’s strokes, but couldn’t quite get it right. 

“I think we did good enough. Let me have it.” He reached for the oar again, and rolled his eyes when Cas denied him. “Cas, I know this shit is hard. Let me help.”

“That’s not the point, Dean! The point is we’re supposed to do it... whatever. Here.” Cas couldn’t explain the tension in his chest, but he didn’t particularly care for unknown bodies of water, and Dean’s impatience with him was making him feel like shit. _ I should be able to move a fucking oar.  _ He handed the oar to Dean and centered the candle again, then opened the cooler to grab the whiskey.

“Cas,” Dean said, much calmer. “I wasn’t trying to upset you. I just didn’t want you to be sore tomorrow.” He brought in the oars and let them float while he watched Cas. “Talk to me.”

_ Oh, nothing. The first date where we’re required to accomplish something together, we fail spectacularly.  _ “I’m fine, Dean.” Cas turned his upper body as slowly as he could to see the river behind him, then straightened out and took a sip right from the bottle. “We should turn around before we end up going over a waterfall or something.”

“Okay, fine, guess we won’t talk about things.” Dean put the right oar back in and rowed them to turn around.

“Really? You, who never wants to talk about anything, is going to get shitty when I attempt not to start an argument on open water with a lit candle inside of our very wooden boat?” Cas’ voice rose at least two octaves, and he started to panic, reaching forward to grab the candle so he could put it out - but the current hit them the wrong way and he slipped, pushing the candle right off of the seat. When he lunged to try and save it, he tipped, losing his footing and started to fall to the side. 

Out of instinct, he reached out for Dean, who grabbed his arms and ditched both ores without hesitation. Not that it would have made a difference, the entire boat tipped over and Dean hung onto Cas as they splashed into the water.

Cas  _ didn’t  _ actually know how to swim, so the second his head went underwater, he thought for sure he was going to die. He flailed, his hand making rough contact with some part of Dean’s body as he tried to get himself to surface. He latched on, wrapping all four of his limbs around Dean and nearly dragging him down, too, but Dean managed to get them both above water. 

Gasping for air, Cas glared at Dean with everything he had. “Damnit, Dean!”

Dean began to laugh, which only infuriated Cas even more. He held onto him like a spider monkey with his eyes narrowed, but all it did was make Dean laugh more.

“What the  _ hell  _ is so funny! Gods, we’re going to drown because  _ you  _ were -” Dean pulled him in by his neck for a kiss. This wasn’t like their last slow, unsure kiss... no, this was  _ smoldering, _ and he tugged on Cas’ hair with one hand while holding him up by his ass with the other. 

He lapped into Cas’ mouth with a moan and Cas only managed to fight it for about a half second before he was melting into it, clutching onto Dean for actual, literal, dear life as the current rushed around them. Cas bit and sucked on Dean’s bottom lip, stopping only long enough to say, “I’m still mad at you,” then diving back in for more not knowing in that moment if he’d ever get enough. 

They kissed until they realized the boat was slowly drifting away, and then Dean pulled back to look at Cas. “You’re adorable when you’re pissed, Cas. I couldn’t help it, but I can’t afford that boat. You’re gonna have to get down so I can grab it, babe.”

A renewed sense of panic spiked through him and he shook his head quickly. “I’ll find a way to pay for it, don’t let me go!” He tightened his legs around Dean’s ass and swallowed hard, looking toward the boat. “I can’t... I can’t swim. I never learned.”

“Sweetheart... I’m standing right now.” Dean stared at him with an expression Cas couldn’t pinpoint.

It suddenly became clear they hadn’t moved at all, nor did Dean seem to be struggling. His entire body flushed with embarrassment and he slowly untangled himself from Dean, stepping back. “Oh. Right.”

Dean pulled him back in and kissed him one more time before turning to grab the boat. Their cooler had sunk, but since the water was only five feet deep, Dean was able to dive down and grab it. He shook his hair off and sprayed Cas with it, then laughed at the bitch face he received.

“I’m still mad at you. Oh, and I don’t think that cooler is waterproof, so… I’m fairly certain your pie got a little waterlogged.”  _ Hit him where it hurts.  _ Cas fumbled his way toward shore and climbed out of the water, rolling onto his back and staring at the sky as he tried to steady his heart rate. 

Dean heaved the boat to shore and was panting as he dragged it up. Dripping wet, he walked over to Cas and sighed. “So... that was a bust.” He grabbed the cooler and dumped out the water, wincing at the poor ruined pie. “Hope you left your phone and wallet in the car.”

“Yes, I did.” Cas kicked off his soggy shoes and peeled his socks off, then deflated and looked up at Dean. “Why did we fail?”

“Cause I was an ass.” Dean unbuttoned his shirt and wrung it out, then the shirt he had under. “I shouldn’t have taken your oar, you were doing great. I was just... I was tryna do the whole ‘random acts of kindness’, but I did it wrong.”

_ Okay, I can work with that.  _ “Dean, this exercise was supposed to be something you and I did together, as a team. You don’t have to  _ try  _ to do the acts of service, you just… do. Like offering to help me with this ridiculous project in the first place. Or doing the dishes after I cook, even though you worked all day. Washing my car, because you know it’s usually the last thing on my mind.” Cas pushed himself to his feet, then tried to unstick his wet shirt from his skin. “Offering to be there for me when I call Jimmy. Being there for me after the… after the…” he trailed off, looking down. “The point is, you don’t have to  _ try,  _ Dean. You already do it. You always have.”

“Okay. I’m glad I do that for you. I wasn’t sure. It always feels like you do everything for me. But you’re right, maybe after all this, we come back out here and try again? C’mon, let’s go find food that doesn’t taste like lake... and more pie.” Dean held out his hand and Cas took it. 

“We’re soaked… let’s just go home.”


	12. Halt and Catch Fire

**Dean**

_So, that definitely didn’t go well._ Dean knew he was an obnoxious person, he almost couldn’t help it. Cas getting annoyed with him wasn’t anything new, but Cas getting _mad_ at him was something else entirely. He rarely got real-life mad at Dean, and when he did, it always stuck with him.

Since high school, Dean had _always_ tried to make Cas smile, and when he was upset with him it felt like he failed. Once he was in bed that night, he was able to think more logically. The date went bad because of Dean, no point in denying that. He also realized he probably shouldn’t have kissed him in that moment, but he couldn’t help it. He found himself wanting to feel Cas as often as he could, and he hated it. _Damn stupid love language crap. Pet me, Cas. I’m your new freckled mutt._

Sunday was awkward, and before Dean could even ask if they were having another date, Cas was gone visiting Jagger. When he got home, he was just beat. He still scratched one off and they ended up having your basic run-of-the-mill picnic, but all the awkwardness was still on his mind at work Monday morning. _Why am I feeling so… needy?_ Dean stared down at his phone with a text message typed out for Cas… again. But like all the other times, he didn’t hit send. 

Matt was still annoying. He followed Sam around like a lost puppy all day, laughing at every joke he said like he was a damn comedian. _Shut up, asshat, we all know Samsquash isn’t that friggin funny._ He ended up calling it a day a little early, just so he could go for a drive. 

Without a destination in mind, he absentmindedly ended up back at that damn boat rental place and parked where he could overlook the water. Dean popped in some Zeppelin, because in times like that, only Page’s guitar could help him clear his mind enough to form actual thoughts. 

He shouldn’t have been surprised when his mind instantly wandered to Cas. They once again didn’t dive too deep into the whole ‘what would you do differently’ spiel after date number eight, but something told Dean they didn’t have to. They both knew that date wasn’t the best, but it also wasn’t the worst. Hell, if he was with anyone else it might have been, but this was Cas. They have already proven to themselves that they could turn any situation better when they were together, but why couldn't they fix this one? 

Dean tried. He tried to get some dinner and salvage the day, but Cas had just wanted to go home, and Dean would never force him to do otherwise. 

He sat there, lost in his own thoughts until the sun began to set, and then finally turned the car on and headed home. 

He wasn’t surprised that Cas was on the couch doing homework, but he _was_ surprised by Cas’ mood. It was obvious he was feeling better, he actually smiled when he saw him. “Hello, Dean.”

“Hey, Cas. You eat yet? I was craving Taco Bell and brought you your favorites. I’ll just shower real quick, and then we’ll eat?” 

He nodded and tilted his head a little. “That sounds good, but hurry up… you know how soggy Taco Bell gets if it sits for too long.”

Dean ran up the stairs and took his shower, surprised when he didn’t get the urge to rub one out real fast. Coming was the _last_ thing on his mind. He wanted to talk to Cas, and he wanted to eat some damn fake Mexican food on his comfy couch. He threw on his Scooby Doo pajama pants and made his way back downstairs, happy to find Cas was still there and not in the kitchen. “Got a lot of homework?” 

“Yes, but I think I’m caught up for now. I was trying to fill in my notes for the project, but…” he trailed off, licking his lips and avoiding Dean’s gaze. “We should eat first, and then talk about why on earth your job kept you so late tonight.”

_Shit... shoulda known he’d ask._ “Sounds good.” Dean pulled out their dinner and they ate with the TV volume low. He took that time to think about whether he should just say he was at work, or tell the truth. It wasn’t until Cas asked again that he decided to go with the truth. “I wasn’t at work. I actually went on a drive.” He was sure Cas knew what that meant, going on a drive to clear his head was something Dean had done since high school.

“Ahh, that makes sense. Do you… want to talk about anything?” Cas eyed him warily and continued before Dean even had a chance to respond. “I want to apologize. The things I said in the boat… I’m sorry. I know you were just trying to help.”

“Nah...” Dean sat back and turned to face him better. “You really didn’t do anything wrong. I know I did, and I shouldn’t have been so hardheaded about rowin’ the boat. I drove out to the water again and just watched the sunset. I wish we got to do that together, actually. It was beautiful. But I wanted to apologize too, for saying your arms would get sore. I wasn’t trying to be _macho_ or anything.”

Cas offered him a small smile and patted the seat next to him. “Come here. We _also_ need to talk about the other date, the one before it. I’ve been putting it off, but… I’m fairly certain that’s a mistake.”

Dean complied, sitting close enough so their legs were touching. “Yeah, we should.” _Shit... this is where he tells me I went too far. That’s why he’s been so distant._

“I... thoroughly enjoyed that. All of it. The quiz was a little silly, but it worked. So for the purposes of the project... it was a very good indicator.” Cas studied the side of Dean’s face, then nudged him gently. “And the release was... incredibly welcome.”

Dean visibly relaxed and looked up at Cas. “Shit, I thought you were mad at me for that. That... ‘release’ was...” _The best? Amazing? A damn tease?_ He wasn’t sure what to say. “I enjoyed it all too, Cas.” Dean took a chance and touched Cas’ hand. “Your mouth is pretty damn awesome.”

Cas chuckled and laced their fingers, squeezing gently. “So is yours, though only my fingers got the pleasure. Technically, we broke our own rule. We said we’d keep things above the waist, and that decidedly was not. But... that’s why I wanted to talk to you about the date instead of putting it off any longer.”

“I’m good with it. I almost told you I was down for everything when we made that rule, but I didn’t wanna freak you out. I’ve always wanted to try all that with you. You’re fucking hot, Cas.” _You said too much, shut up and let him talk now._

He was in Dean’s lap in an instant, pushing him back against the couch. “Good. I was worried suggesting we throw the rule out the window wasn’t going to go over well, but this is one time I’m happy to be wrong.” Cas slid his hand down Dean’s chest but stopped. “We’re two consenting adults. None of this has to change anything. We’re just… two adults - best friends, actually - fake dating and having very _real_ sexual relations. Do you agree?” He dropped forward, stopping way too damn close to Dean’s face to allow him to think clearly. “Tell me you agree.”

Dean nodded and then flipped them quickly. He leaned in to bite and suck Cas’ neck as he lifted his shirt and kissed down his torso. “It’s my turn, sweetheart.”

“Shit...” Cas lifted his hips off the couch like he was chasing Dean’s mouth, and carded a hand through his hair. “Bite me harder next time.”

_You got it, babe._ Dean gripped the waistband of Cas’ pants and pulled them down, biting all along his thighs to tease. He could see Cas was already at full mast, but he wanted to torture him a little. 

After sucking a mark on Cas’ hip, Dean finally fixed his sights on Cas’ leaking cock. He started with a swipe of his tongue, licking off the precome already dripping down his length and then grinned up at Cas through his eyelashes.

His pupils were blown and his skin was flushed as he tugged in Dean’s hair, trying to pull him closer. “I’ve spent the last three weeks fantasizing about this and now you’re going to tease me?” Cas gripped his own cock with his free hand and angled it toward Dean’s mouth. 

Dean couldn’t fight the small laugh that escaped but he stuck out his tongue, letting Cas slide his cock along it and then dove in, sucking the head inside his mouth and swirling his tongue along the tip. 

Cas already tasted so good he couldn’t wait for the money shot. He kept his eyes on Cas, watching him come more and more unglued by the second.

He rocked into Dean’s mouth, not hard, just enough to urge him along. “Fuck, Dean... you’re incredible. How the hell do you look so good like that?” Cas moaned, long and low, his thighs shaking underneath him.

That was enough encouragement to get Dean going and sliding Cas to the back of his throat. He had to reach down and grip his own cock at how fucking hot Cas was but he didn’t stop. Dean reached his other hand up to run it along Cas’ chest and flick his nipple, loving the reaction Cas gave with every new sensation.

By that point, Cas felt like a ball of tension, moaning Dean’s name like it was the only damn word he knew. His fist tightened in Dean’s hair as he gasped, digging his ass into the couch. “De - I’m -”

Hearing Cas finally moan his damn name had Dean groaning around his cock and reaching in to stroke his own. _C’mon, baby... give it to me._ He slid Cas back and relaxed his throat, struggling to keep his eyes open and locked with Cas’.

He came hard, holding Dean’s head with both hands and shoving himself down Dean’s throat as he emptied, groaning his name so loudly it was all Dean could hear.

Swallowing it all was actually unnecessary with how deep Cas was, and when he slowly pulled off, he lapped at Cas’ heavy cock just to watch his body shudder.

“You’re incredible. Seriously, unbelievably incredible.” Cas let out a sated breath and dropped his eyes to the lowest point on Dean he could actually see. “Are you hard for me?” Soft fingers stroked Dean’s cheek. “Do you want my mouth again?”

_Ah, fuck yeah..._ He nodded, hoping his face didn’t give away how desperate he really was. “M’so hard for you, Cas. Look at what the taste of your come did to me.” He sat back, exposing his throbbing cock. That was quite the opposite of what Dean expected to happen tonight, but he damn sure wasn’t complaining.

**Castiel**

Cas’ mouth was watering before he even slid off the couch. He pushed Dean’s chest gently until he laid down on the ground, then slid Dean’s pants the rest of the way off. He licked and sucked a line up his left leg and flicked his tongue over Dean’s balls, then kept going up his muscled body until he was hovering completely over him. Cas’ spent cock hung heavy on Dean’s hips as he leaned in to kiss him, savoring his own taste and the way those gorgeous lips felt against his own. 

He rutted down carefully, dragging his body over the length of Dean’s cock. _He wants to tease? I’ll tease._

“Fuck... Casss...” Dean’s body twitched underneath him. “C’mon...”

Bracing himself with one hand, he reached down with the other and pulled Dean’s hard cock against his own spent one. “So big, Dean. It looks even bigger right now, do you see?” He angled his body to give Dean a better view and ran his thumb over the dampness on his tip, then trailed it down Dean’s. 

“Fuckin’ tease. Is it too big for that pretty mouth now?” Dean rutted up against him and bit his lip.

Cas tilted his head and smirked. “I don’t know, Dean. You tell me.” He shimmied back, leaning down and swallowing Dean whole and fighting back the gag that followed. He bobbed slowly, sucking hard as he traveled back up and locked challenging eyes with Dean. 

Dean’s groan was sinful and he reached to grip Cas’ already fucked hair. “Goddamnit, Cas... so fucking goo-”

He expanded his throat, humming around him and sucking messily, twisting his hand over the base of Dean’s cock. _Give it to me._ Cas took him all the way in, rubbing his face against Dean’s pelvis. 

Dean tugged harder as his hips thrust up. “Fu- Cas!” He held Cas in place and spilled down the back of his throat. 

Pulling off was more difficult than Cas thought it would be. _I could keep his cock buried in my throat forever, what the hell is happening to me?_ He heaved in some welcome air as he sat back, grinning down at Dean’s limp body. “Do you still think I have a problem fitting it all in my mouth?”

“Huh-uh.” Dean placed his hand over his eyes and huffed a laugh, making no effort to pull his pants back up. Cas took Dean’s distraction as an opportunity to lean over and wrap his lips around Dean’s nipple, biting gently, only letting go when Dean jerked.

“Ah! Fucker.” Dean sat up then and fixed his clothes. “Let’s do another date tomorrow... speaking of... maybe we should save the sexy time for dates?” He blushed and rubbed his neck. “Otherwise I won’t know when is and isn’t appropriate and I... don’t wanna fuck this up.” He waved his hand between them.

_How about every second of every day is appropriate?_ Cas blinked, trying to judge how serious Dean was. Knowing him as well as Cas did, it was obvious that Dean wouldn’t have said anything at all if he didn’t firmly believe it, so reluctantly, Cas nodded. _We still have forty two more dates, that’s… going to have to be enough. Of course he wants to separate it._ “Actually, you’re right. If we keep it purely related to the project, it… it’ll be easier to go back to normal when it’s over.”

Dean looked down, his expression unreadable. “Yeah... normal.” He huffed a laugh and collapsed back on the ground. “Let’s scratch off a date for tomorrow, might have to stop at the store.”

Nodding weirdly, Cas got up to grab the book. _How in the seven hells am I ever supposed to go back to not touching him?_ He flipped open to a random page and saw one with the timer signal, which told him it required prep. He scratched it off quickly and read, “Go to the store and buy modeling clay and a blindfold. Then, watch the pottery scene in the movie _Ghost_ and take turns reenacting the scene. Help your partner create something of your choosing.” Cas blushed furiously thinking about the details of that scene, and looked up at Dean. “It’s a good thing we’ve crossed that particular line already, hm?”

Dean chuckled and stood up. “Whatever we make, it’s goin’ on display. I’m actually excited for this scene, that shit was hot.” He walked up behind Cas and nuzzled the back of his neck. “Guess I’ll stay dirty tomorrow.”

Cas shivered, turning to face Dean. “Please do.” 

~~~~

Finding the proper materials wasn’t as easy as he thought it would be, and getting their hands on a pottery wheel for cheap was even harder. Luckily for them, Ares’ mom happened to have one she couldn’t use anymore. 

They’d set it up in the garage, and Cas sat there, cringing to himself as the wet clay slid between his hands. He was blindfolded and couldn’t see a damned thing, but heard when the door that led into the house opened up and the beginning of _Unchained Melody_ drifted in.

“What are you doing?” 

The blindfold covered the rolling of his eyes when he realized Dean was literally acting out the movie but decided to play along. “Couldn’t sleep.” 

Dean chuckled and wrapped his strong hands around him, then slid up his body to his shoulders. “You coulda been naked, you know.” 

Glad he didn’t have to keep up with some script, Cas smirked as goosebumps covered his skin. “Dean, you made me come out here in just my boxers. If you want me naked, all you have to do is ask.”

“I’ll remember that.” Dean nuzzled behind Cas’ ear and ran his hands down Cas’ arms towards the clay. “Oops.” 

Whatever Cas had created was thoroughly ruined, but they gathered the clay again, and Dean’s hands wrapped around his.

_Fucking hells._ He tried to quietly suck in a breath, but he knew Dean could hear it. “What…” _Shit. I can’t focus like this._ “What are we making?”

“Uh... a vase.” Dean huffed a small laugh and then nibbled Cas’ neck. “A beautiful vase.”

_Somehow I doubt that._ Cas tilted his head, turning to kiss Dean but landing somewhere on his cheek. _Stupid blindfold._ He straightened out, sliding his hands further down and letting Dean guide them back up. “It’s big.”

“That’s what she said.” He giggled like a child and then started kissing along Cas’ jaw. He clearly wanted this as much as Cas, and when he ran his dirty, wet hands up Cas’ arm again, Cas started tenting his boxers. 

“Are we done yet?” His voice was thick with arousal, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. Absolutely every time Dean touched him felt like electricity in his veins, and he needed… _more._

“Almost, sweetheart.” It took a few minutes more before Dean was shutting off the machine and standing up. “Leave the blindfold on and face me, Cas.”

He moved quickly, swiveling the chair toward the sound of Dean’s voice and reaching out for him. “You realize without my glasses I wouldn’t be able to see you clearly, anyway. Honestly, the blindfold is overkill for me.”

“Just wait.” 

Seconds passed with nothing, and Cas thought he was going to burst right out of his skin. Suddenly, Cas could feel Dean’s rough hands sliding up his thighs, spreading the clay in places it definitely didn’t need to be - but knowing that fact only made it hotter. He traced slow lines, driving Cas crazy. Dean’s hot breath brushed over his cheek, and the smell of the cherry pie he was just eating before coming outside reached his nose. “How’s it feel, sweetheart?”

“Keep going,” he all but pleaded. Having Dean’s hands on him like this was intoxicating, and he wasn’t even close to being ready for it to be over. “Fuck, keep going.”

Dean chuckled and placed a kiss in the corner of his mouth and then stepped away. 

Within a few seconds, his hands were wet and on his thighs again, this time between them and sliding towards his crotch. The ghost touches had him absolutely vibrating with need, gripping the sides of his chair and thrusting up. “Dean!”

“Ah, hell.” Dean shoved the blindfold off his face and slammed their mouths together, practically lifting Cas off his chair.

Just as he thought, Cas still could barely make him out, but he didn’t need to. He stood, wrapping his arms around Dean’s neck and sucking in a shocked breath as Dean gripped his thighs just below his ass and hauled him up. “Fuck,” he whispered, feverishly licking and sucking on Dean’s neck as he felt himself be pressed against the wall. 

“Cas...” Dean rutted so hard Cas could feel his full length against his and before he realized what was happening, they found the perfect pace.

One hand flew to the garage wall behind him in a vain attempt to find something else to hold onto. The fact that Dean was strong enough to hold him like that had Cas leaking so much his boxers were already damp. He rocked down, trying to be careful not to jerk too much as Dean pulled their bodies together. “Dean, that feels so -” _Good? Amazing? Manhandle-me-more-often-perfect?_

Dean moaned and flipped their positions so he could use the wall to slide down onto the floor. He leaned in and latched onto Cas’ neck, still humping into Cas desperately.

Finally able to move, Cas spread his legs as far as he could to grind down harder, gasping loudly at the friction caused from Dean’s jeans. “Don’t stop, please don’t stop. I’m - so close, Dean!”

“Fu- me too, Cas.” His hands gripped Cas’ hips so hard he was sure there would be small reminders for days to come.

Desperately rutting, Cas tugged on Dean’s hair and dug his nails into his shoulder. He threw his head back, his clothed cock catching the bulge in Dean’s pants just the right way and sending him over the edge. He grunted, moaning Dean’s name and moving even faster as his boxers were soaked with his spend.

Dean thrust against him two more times before he came with a strained grunt. He laid his head back with a thump and ran his fingers through Cas' hair. "You're all dirty, baby."

From what he could tell, Dean was too, and the thought made him shudder. “And to think… we have to do this all over again. It’s your turn.” 

Dean chuckled and nodded towards the clay. “Go see what you created over there, Cas."

He looked around for his glasses and slid them on, blinking rapidly for a moment before walking over to the pottery wheel. There, instead of a vase, was a giant, clay penis. “Uhm, Dean? What is that?”

Dean walked over with his bottom lip between his teeth. “A vase."

“A vase.” Cas eyed it then turned to him, darting his tongue out between his lips. “Where do the flowers go, then?”

"Oh shit, uh..." Dean reached out and poked his finger in the still-moist top while making a _‘boop’_ noise. “Right there."

“Boop.” _My gods, how is he so damn adorable?_ He glanced from vase to the childish grin on Dean’s face and laughed, a quiet sound that steadily grew as he shook his head and walked toward the door. “You’ve lost your pottery privileges, but congratulations. Now you get to clean me off in the shower.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blucifer’s art though 👏🏻 👏🏻


	13. The Things They Carried

**Dean**

Things with Cas were... strange. Not in a bad way, but they definitely were different. 

They ended up not showering together because the mess would have been ridiculous, but Dean wondered what that would have been like. Would they have stuck to business? Probably not. That clay date was so damn romantic they probably would have prematurely confessed their love if they actually had showered together. No way they would have ended up in their own beds. 

Thursday night, Dean needed to clear his head... again. Only this time, Sammy could tell something was wrong and asked him out for a beer. He nearly said no, but he didn't have anything else going on, so after he let Cas know... he agreed. 

What he didn't expect was for him to invite a bunch of other coworkers. To make matters worse, none of them could come... except Matt.  _ Awesome. _

They sat in a corner booth while Sam went to get them drinks, and Matt looked like he wanted to ask Dean something, but Dean made no effort to open up the conversation.

After a couple of minutes of strained silence, the little shit finally spoke up. “You’re Castiel’s roommate, right?”

Dean huffed a laugh...  _ roommate? More like... well shit... roommate. _ “Yeah. Cas is my best friend.”

He blushed, dropping his eyes to the table. “Do you have any pointers? I’m crazy into him, but… we don’t talk much anymore. He said he couldn’t really date right now because of some school project, but that he’d call me when it was over. I’m just… trying to figure out how to stay relevant until then.”

_ Is this a joke? Where's the fucking prank show host? He isn't into you, asshat, or he'd be doing the damn project with you. _ "Uh... look. Cas is... amazing. You know this, but I think he was just being polite. Maybe back off, and if he comes to you after the semester... then you'll know. But let him decide, don't pressure him. Matter fact, I wouldn't reach out at all. Let him call you. He likes the chase."  _ Bullshit, but somethin' tells me Cas won't mind. _

“Oh. Yeah, of course.” Matt nodded just as Sam came back with their drinks, then grabbed his and took a huge gulp. 

Sam flicked his eyes from Matt to Dean and pursed his lips. “What’d you do?”

"Me? Nothin'. I do somethin' wrong, Matt?" Dean looked over at him and watched his expression. He was nice enough, even used the right name today.

He shook his head, looking a little scared. “N-no, of course not. He actually just saved me a lot of trouble, I think.”

“Oh?” Sam dropped his elbow on the table and turned his body to face Dean. “How’s that?”

"He asked for dating advice and I gave some." Dean took a drink and sat back with his legs spread open. "Don't make that face, I know a thing or two about dating, Sammy."

Sam glanced back at Matt, who nodded his agreement. Sam huffed and gallic shrugged. “If it was about Cas, I wouldn’t trust a word he said. You’d be better off asking me or their neighbor Ares.”

"The hell does that mean? I know more about Cas than anyone else. We've lived together for years, Sam. Or did you forget? No one knows Cas like me." Dean took another drink, chugging half the bottle.

“Uh huh.” Sam took a slow sip with a smug expression and tipped his glass toward Matt. “He’s got... some repressed feelings, but he’s right about one thing. Best to move on from Cas.” 

Matt held up his hands and straightened in his seat. “Hey, I don’t want any problems. Cas is just hot, smart, and nice. Can’t blame a guy for being interested.”

"Repressed feelings?" Dean turned to face Sam. “What kinda feelings, Samuel?"  _ Asshat thinks he's so smart. _

Sam winked at Matt as if Dean couldn’t see it then cleared his throat. “If you don’t, you won’t mind if  _ I  _ ask him out, right?”

"Why would you? You're dating this guy's sister. But if you're tellin’ me you want to, go ahead Sam. Just know you aren't his type, so good luck."  _ Not gonna let this asshat get to me. None of these asshats are Cas' type, and even if they were... Cas wouldn't. _

He rolled his eyes and sat back, shaking his head. “All I’m trying to say, Dean, is that  _ some day…  _ someone that  _ is  _ his type is going to ask him out, and it’ll be too late.” 

Dean finished off his beer with a frown. He could feel Matt's eyes on him, and bit back some asshole 'well it wasn't  _ this _ guy' comment and kept his focus on his dickhead of a brother.  _ Too late for what? This isn't some romcom. _ "He isn't gonna date anyone this semester."  _ But me. _

“Okay. I’ll stop bringing it up. Just don’t come crying to me when you walk in on him blowing some guy because he got tired of waiting on you. I’m just trying to help.”

"Cas isn’t gonna blow anyone else, Sam."  _ I'm all he needs... wait what? _ Dean blushed when he realized he said the word ‘else’ and it was very obvious Sam caught it.  _ Goddammit. _

He watched Dean with a very knowing smile and hummed, turning back to Matt. “And now we know why he’s being so calm about all of this. He’s already got him.”

"Shut up, Sam." Dean got up and rushed to the bar to get them all another round.  _ Fuck... was this date thing a secret? No... J and Ares know... I'm sure Charlie knows. It’s fine Sam knows too. _ But Dean just accidentally admitted to much more than dating. He got three more beers and snuck a shot before making his way back to the table.  _ I'll just change the subject. _ "You know if we got that preschool contract yet?" 

“Nah, they’re still negotiating between us and Trenton’s crew, last I heard. I think we’re gonna get the bid, though.” Sam took his beer and Matt just eyed his. “Hey, listen… I’m sorry I’ve been such an ass about the whole Cas thing. You’re just… seriously hard-headed sometimes, and anyone with eyes can see what you two have. I thought if I pushed your buttons a little bit, you’d finally admit it. I’m happy for you guys.” Sam held out his bottle to toast, and Dean sighed and sat back, not bringing up his beer.

"It's not worthy of a toast yet, Sam. I wasn't joking, Cas won't date anyone this semester because he is fake dating me. For his damn school project."  _ Shut up, shut up... ah, hell. _ "Some of the dates..." he glanced at Matt and then decided to just keep talking, "got a little outta hand. We're supposed to be faking it and yet it doesn't feel fake. Not at all."

His brother looked at Matt and smiled apologetically. “Hey, can we… do this another time?” Matt nodded quickly and got up, not saying anything as he dropped some cash on the table and clapped Sam on the shoulder. Once he was gone, Sam took a deep breath and continued. “Okay. Let’s… unpack that. First, I already knew about the fake dating thing, but the rest? I’m not really surprised. Do you… do you love him?”

"Course I love him. He's my best friend."  _ Kinda question is that? Oh... oh he means  _ **_in_ ** _ love... shit. _ "Oh... uh, I dunno."  _ This conversation was a bad idea. _ Dean drank more beer and rubbed his neck nervously.

Sam nodded, looking a lot less like an asshole now and a lot more like a little brother. “You don’t have to know yet. I’m sure this is a really weird situation. Do you have any idea how he feels?”

"No... I know he likes the sex." Dean chuckled at Sam's expression. “And I mean, of course he does. I swear, I've never had better and I haven't even actually fucked him yet. I've had a lot of sex, Sam. It's never been like this."

The knowing smile on Sam’s face said it all. “Yeah, love kinda does that.” He took a sip then spun the base of the bottle on the table. “Anyway, I get it. So, if you need to talk about it, I get it.”

“It’s the book's fault, right? We have to do all this romantic shit. We legit remade that damn pottery scene from  _ Ghost _ a couple nights ago. Like, how are we  _ not _ supposed to fuck after that?”

Sam sighed quietly and looked like he wanted to word vomit, but kept it short. “I don’t know, Dean. Say you did the same thing with someone else. Would it have ended the exact same, or would you have just… gone home after?”

“I dunno, I’d never do that with anyone else. I don’t want to.” The more he talked about it, the more confused he became.  _ Any girlfriend asked me to recreate a damn chick flick, I woulda laughed in their face. _

“Well, that should tell you something right there.” Sam patted Dean’s back and stood up like he recognized someone, but sat back down. “Have you guys messed around at all between dates, or is it only those?”

Dean frowned and looked around but went back to the conversation. “Uh... yeah we did once, and then decided to save that for dates. Who did you just see?”

“Guess you gotta find out if you drew that line because you  _ want  _ it to be fake, or if you’re just scared of admitting it’s real.” Sam smiled over Dean’s shoulder and chuckled quietly. “Hey, Cas. Imagine meeting you here.”

Dean’s eyes widened and he took a huge gulp of beer. “Hey there, sweetheart.”  _ Shut up, Sam. Don’t even gotta look at your damn face right now. Fuck, what did Cas hear?! _

**Castiel**

_ Why the hell does he look so nervous?  _ Cas smiled, accepting Sam’s bear hug and then sitting across from Dean. He eyed the third empty beer bottle and then glanced toward the bar. “Oh, am I in someone’s seat?”

“Nope. What brings you here? Missed me?” Dean leaned in slightly.

_ Yes. _ “Jask and Ares dragged me here. They’re... doing something they probably shouldn’t be doing in the bathroom. They barely made it all the way here.” He chuckled quietly and reached across the table, brushing his thumb over the back of Dean’s hand quickly before pulling back.

“Sounds like a good time to me.” Dean lifted an eyebrow, slowly looking more confident with each passing second. 

Sam cleared his throat and hid a grin behind his beer. Cas put two and two together and assumed Dean must’ve told Sam  _ something  _ about their endeavors, but wasn’t sure.  _ Might as well find out.  _ He tilted his head, smirking slightly at Dean. “You’re right. Shame you’re not on a… date, hm?”

“Damn shame.” Dean’s eyes devoured him from across the table before he gallic shrugged. “Rules are made to be broken.”

Cas leaned back in his seat, causing his leg to slide forward between Dean’s. “Do you  _ want _ to break the rules, Dean?” 

He felt Dean shift in his seat so more of their legs were touching. “Never was good with ‘em, Cas. I’d rather live in the now, anyway.”

Quietly, Sam got up and slipped away, and neither of them stopped him. Cas didn’t pull his eyes away from Dean and shook his head slightly with a smile. “We could have another date tomorrow night or if you’d rather not wait…” Cas tilted his head to the side and bit his lip. “I’m sure we could kick Jask and Ares out of the bathroom.”

Dean looked pained as he contemplated the decision. Cas would be lying if he said he didn’t want it now... but they had agreed. “I dunno, Cas... m’kinda dirty.”

“That happens to be how I prefer you, Dean.” Cas slid his foot up Dean’s leg and was just about to press it gently against his crotch when Jask and Ares appeared, one sitting next to each of them. He straightened up quickly and flushed, looking at Jask. “You have horrible timing, Jaskier. As per usual.”

Jask winked and nudged him, then looked across the table at Dean. “Had a feeling you were here. How dare you come out without me?”

“Blame Spamtastic.” Dean looked around for his brother and frowned. “Shit, when did he leave?”

Ares chuckled and met Cas’ eyes. “Were you two distracted?”

“You could say that.” Cas frowned slightly and tapped the table. “We were just talking about going home. Dean… is dirty.”  _ And I’d very much like to make that worse before it gets better. _

“Nope. You guys are stuck here for a drink. We’re not moving, right, J?” Ares tilted his head at his boyfriend.

Dean shrugged and looked in his bottle. “Gonna need a new one, then.”

_ Great. Who needs enemies, right?  _ Cas closed his eyes for a moment, realizing that by the time they got back home, they’d be too tired to do much of anything. They both had to get up early for work and school, and their obligations would always win out over the fun. 

_ Is that even what this is? Fun?  _ As he watched the way Dean’s smile lit up the room, he wasn’t so sure anymore. 

~~~~

Cas stopped to see his father on his way home from class the following day, and Jagger had asked again if he’d spoken to Jimmy. It was enough that he was pacing in the living room holding his phone in his hand when Dean walked in the door. 

“Hey Ca- what’s wrong?” Dean reached him in three strides, not even bothering to take off his boots.

He whirled to face him, holding out his phone. “I have to call Jimmy. I don’t want to. You do it.”

Dean relaxed and took the phone. “I will if you want. But if you do it yourself, I’ll play with your hair while you talk.”

Some of the wild apprehension in Cas’ chest calmed down at the thought. “Yes. Okay.” He grabbed Dean’s arm before he could change his mind and dragged him to the couch, pushing him down and then plopping down himself, pivoting and laying face-up with his head in Dean’s lap. He held the phone above his face with Jimmy’s contact info pulled up. “Okay. Play.”

Dean began playing with his hair, watching him with a worried expression. It rang five times before Jimmy answered. “Castiel? Is Father okay?”

“Yes,” Cas said quickly. They’d suffered enough in that department without Cas allowing him to think something had happened to their dad. “I saw him today, he... he’s still weak, but... they’re hoping he might be able to come home by Christmas.”

“Okay, good. Is there... something else?” Dean’s hands stopped moving and saw he was frowning. He quickly snapped out of it and started running his fingers through his hair again.

Cas closed his eyes.  _ Just… talk. Focus on Dean’s hands, and talk. He’s my brother. My  _ **_twin._ ** “Yes. I… I miss you. I was hoping we could…”

Jimmy exhaled a long breath. “Castiel. Stop. I don’t know why you all of a sudden want to reach out, but you can just save it. We know where we stand with each other, goodbye.”

_ Click.  _

He’d known it was coming, but it didn’t stop it from hurting any less. Cas didn’t know if Dean could hear Jimmy or not, but in a hope that he couldn’t, Cas kept talking to dead air. “That’s great. Yes. I’ll… see you then.” 

“Cas.” Dean touched along his jaw. “Fuck that guy. Don’t let him get to you. You’re the most amazing and thoughtful person I know. This is  _ his _ loss, not yours.”

_ Not hardly. _ Cas squeezed his eyes shut tighter and rolled, facing Dean’s stomach. “It may not have been my fault, but I killed his mother, Dean. My mother.” The familiar swell of grief bubbled just under the surface, held at bay by nothing but the feeling of Dean’s fingers. “That is his loss. But thank you, I... had a feeling that’s how it was going to go.”

“Cas, c’mere.” Dean moved so he could properly hold Cas in his arms. “You didn’t kill her, it was an accident. You did everything right. That fucking asshole ran the light. You gotta stop blaming yourself.” He held Cas so tight it felt as though he physically made himself Cas’ anchor.

“I know that, Dean. I know it wasn’t my fault. But I was still the one driving.” Tears welled in his eyes and he wrapped his arms around Dean, grounding himself in the scent of Dean’s sweat.  _ Why does even that smell good? Like home?  _ “He’s never going to forgive me. It’s the only thing my father has asked of me in years, and I can’t give it to him.”

“And that isn’t your fault either, sweetheart. Jimmy is a grown ass man. If he wants to keep throwing this tantrum like a kid, then your dad will understand. I’m sure he’s giving it to Jim, too. He just needs to grow the fuck up.”

Cas shifted so he was straddling Dean, then buried his face in his neck. It felt natural despite not being a line they’d ever crossed before, and it was comforting in ways Cas hadn’t anticipated. “Thank you, Dean. I don’t know what I ever did in this life or the last to deserve you, but… you’re the main reason I stopped believing I killed my own mother. And I’ll never be able to repay you for that.”

“You don’t gotta repay me, Cas. Just keep being you. I’d do anything for you.”

There weren’t many things in life that Cas readily believed. But that?  _ That  _ he believed. “I know, Dean.” Cas sat up slightly to look in his eyes and brushed his thumb over Dean’s cheek. “And I’d do anything for you.” 

“I know.” Dean leaned in and kissed him softly and rested their foreheads together, and it felt too damn good for Cas to point out it wasn’t a date night. 

Eventually, Cas stopped being selfish and let Dean up so he could shower, then they ate dinner in relative silence. Dean hugged him before he went up to bed, and when Cas finally entered his own room, he didn’t particularly want to sleep.

He changed in a daze, pulling off everything but his boxers. It was colder than normal in his room for some reason, but it felt good on his skin as he laid down and tried to stop the swirling thoughts about Jimmy and everything they’d been through as brothers. First, the death of their mother, then the stroke that nearly took their father from them, too. With no other siblings, they should’ve at least had each other to rely on, but Jimmy never could forgive him for being the one behind the wheel.  _ It could have been either one of us, or Dad. But it was me. Why? Why were  _ **_we_ ** _ the ones at that intersection when that man decided a phone call was more important than watching the road?  _

Cas could still clearly remember the way Astarte had thrown her arm out across his chest in an attempt to brace him from the impact, but it hadn’t done any good. He absentmindedly traced the scars on his chest from the explosion of glass that had followed, and let a pair of tears fall.  _ I love you, Mom. I’m so sorry.  _

Sleep came for him eventually, but all he did was relive the crash that ruined his family.  _ The song on the radio, the squeal of tires… the deafening sound of the metal giving way and six panes of glass shattering at once.  _

_ The scream that cut off in the middle, and the odd way the arm that tried to save his life was twisted. He’d tried to move to get to her, to help her, to see any sign of life at all… but there were none. He’d screamed for her, cried for her, begged for her to wake up, until -  _

He jerked awake, startled by the strong arms wrapping around him. “I got you, I got you.” Dean shushed him and pulled him close, climbing in his bed without hesitation. “Just a dream, babe. I got you.”

Cas curled against him and buried his face in Dean’s chest, nodding a little. “Stay with me?”  _ Fuck. It’s not his job to stay. Stop making it his job to stay.  _

“Always.”


	14. I Think I’m Gonna Like It Here

**Dean**

Cas didn’t have nightmares often, but Dean always felt so bad for him when he did. It was one of the few things he couldn’t protect him from but waking up together was nice… really nice. 

Dean actually woke up excited for their date. They’d fallen behind after that call with dumbass Jimmy and had to postpone their date, but he still had no idea what it was since they decided last night to scratch it off together at breakfast. 

After washing up, he jogged down the stairs, happy Cas was looking better. “Mornin’ sunshine, glad you got some rest.” Without thinking, he walked over and kissed his head.

Cas grabbed him right before he moved away and held him close, kissing his cheek. “I have you to thank for that, and you know it. So, thank you.” He smiled a little sheepishly and then got the book, flipping open to a random page. 

He blushed and offered a small, “your welcome,” and then watched Cas scratch off the next date. “Wanna go to your dad’s and have another bonfire?”

“We could. And he has a projector... I think it would work well against the back of the garage. Should be dark enough we could watch a movie.” Cas read over it again. “It says we need decorative lights or candles... and blankets.”

“Hell yeah, let’s go all out. We can make those hobo dinners with the foil over the fire. Bring like seven blankets... pie... we got candles and... let’s go to the store.” Dean didn’t notice how excited he was sounding, he just wanted Cas to smile.

It worked. Cas grinned and shook his head at Dean’s enthusiasm, then closed the book. “Okay. Then, the date starts now, right? As in, right now, because we’re about to go to the store?”

“Let’s do it! Wanna go to Missouri’s and get some breakfast first?” Dean ran his fingers through Cas’ hair because he could, and he knew Cas liked it.

Cas nodded, leaning into the touch and then pulling Dean into a kiss. “We’re on a date, I’m allowed.” He wrapped both hands around the sides of Dean’s neck and kissed him again, sliding his tongue into his mouth.

Dean went willingly and opened right up for the kiss. They just slept in the same bed and didn’t mess around once, he wanted Cas so bad he was instantly hardening and reaching to grip his ass.

The kiss quickly became sloppy and Cas pulled back, but kept their bodies flushed. “We should… we should pack some lube. Just in case?” 

Dean took a quick intake of breath and nodded. “Uh... yeah. That sounds... I’d like that.” He blushed at how dumb he sounded and then kissed Cas again as a distraction from his rapidly forming boner over that one sentence; but kissing Cas didn’t help at all, and their bodies were so pressed together there was no way Cas couldn’t feel it.

He rutted against Dean and then dropped to his knees, rubbing his nose against Dean’s crotch and looking up at him. “Let me thank you properly.” He slowly reached up and pulled Dean’s waistband down, exposing him and mouthing over his length.

_Oh, fuck._ Dean let Cas take whatever he wanted - this was better than rubbing one out in the bathroom before they went to the store, anyway... much better. He raked his fingers through his hair and nodded, his bottom lip between his teeth.

“Hold still, Dean.” Cas inched forward on his knees and held his gaze as he stroked Dean slowly, guiding his now rock hard length into his mouth and sliding his tongue under the head. 

_Hold still? With this perfect mouth on my dick? Sure._ He struggled, to say the least, but he closed his eyes and let Cas be the boss. 

Cas moved at his own damn pace, squeezing Dean’s ass and driving him deeper into that tight, hot throat, and the vibrations coming from Cas’ moans made him shiver. He picked up speed, bringing a hand forward to play with Dean’s balls and pressed up just behind them.

“Fu- Cas...” _Don’t stop..._ If this was a thank you, it was the best damn thank you of his life.

His hips canted forward and Cas reached down to palm himself as he sucked faster, more insistently, and Dean released a choked off moan as he spilled down his throat. Normally he’d be embarrassed by how fast he came, but not with Cas. Cas’ mouth was too good to feel anything but bliss. “Damn, sweetheart.” He touched Cas’ face gently and stared down into his eyes.

A soft chuckle sent an additional buzz through his cock before Cas pulled off and licked his lips. “Okay. We can go get breakfast now.”

~~~~

Breakfast was awesome as usual, and Missouri sent them home with a pie. They strolled the store aisles for supplies and Dean _might_ have gotten too many twinkle lights... but he wanted this to be a great date for Cas. Especially if they were about to _actually_ fuck. “Alright, we got pie, other food, lights, stuff for a fire... we forgettin’ anything?”

“I don’t think so.” Cas bit his lip for a moment. “I think we have everything else we need over there, the projector, movies… blankets. I think we’re good, especially because most of this is superfluous, anyway.”

“Now we pick the movie. What you in the mood for, Cas?” Dean leaned in and kissed his cheek, not caring that a hot girl was walking by. It was weird; he found himself looking around so much less and looking at Cas so much more nowadays.

Cas hummed quietly and headed for the check-out counter. “Honestly? Anything but _Twilight.”_

“Ugh... yeah... Should it be romance?” Dean loaded everything and pulled out his wallet to pay.

“It doesn’t have to be.” Cas handed him some money to cover his share of the cost and started bagging everything. “Why don’t you pick? I think it’s only fair.”

“Okay.” He thought about it the whole drive, and when they got there, he had an idea. “I know Jagger has a bunch of romcoms, let’s watch that _Date Night_ one... it is date night.”

He grinned, nodding his approval, but there was also something… else behind it. “Is this you admitting you secretly love romcoms?” 

“Zip it, Cas. If you tell a soul, I will... I don’t know... somethin’ bad. You’ve been warned.” _That made absolutely no fucking sense. Whatever._ He climbed out and started grabbing their things, realizing too late he forgot booze.

It helped that they had breakfast so late, because by the time they got the blankets, lights, candles, and the projector set up, the sun was starting to go down. Cas pulled off his shirt thanks to the summer heat and fanned himself with his hand. “I hope it cools off soon.”

Dean’s eyes roamed his torso and he reached out before he realized what he was doing. Cas was much skinnier than him, but he was still toned and muscular and just... fucking gorgeous.

Cas slid his hands around Dean’s body and kissed his jaw. “Is it weird how… _not_ weird this is getting?” 

“Maybe. I dunno, it feels... normal.” _No, right, it feels right._ He tugged on Cas’ hair to kiss his lips. “Is it all okay? I’ve never been this... touchy before.”

Nodding, Cas gently kissed him again and snaked his fingers under Dean’s shirt until he reached bare skin. “That’s apparently something we both like, and... technically, we’re _supposed_ to love each other in our own language... or whatever the hell that said.”

“Well it all feels good, so we must be doin’ it right.” But thinking back, it never felt _this_ good. He specifically remembered trying to get out from under his girlfriends because they were so clingy. Not with Cas. With Cas, he was probably the clingy one.

Their bodies pressed closer together as Cas hummed. “I agree. I think things are going very well so far. Even our bad dates have taught me something, so if that continues… I should have enough for the project.”

_Project... right. How could I forget?_ “Yeah, that’s good.” Dean pulled away and went to grab them waters and snacks. He was nearly angry at himself for forgetting this was all for school. Nothing more.

Cas had the movie started when he returned and was already laying down. The sun was almost completely set, so the candles and hanging lights actually looked pretty damn cool. Cas patted the blanket next to him and smirked up at him. “Are you going to keep all eight of those shirts on?”

“First of all, there’s three. Not eight.” Dean pulled off his flannel, then his T-shirt and then his tank top. “Better?” He laid down next to Cas and got comfy. “This is nice.”

Those damn fingertips danced across Dean’s bare stomach. “Yes, this is better. You’re gorgeous, and I’ll never apologize for wanting to look at you.” Cas leaned over, kissed his chest, and then stayed there, snuggling up next to him. 

_Ah, fuck it._ Dean rolled Cas onto his back and started kissing his neck. “I need to thank you for this mornin’, that okay?” He kissed again, sucking a small mark while he waited for Cas’ answer.

“Please do…” Cas lifted his hips and tipped his head back, moaning quietly and digging his fingers into Dean’s sides. “That feels good, really… good…” 

Dean huffed a laugh and then kissed his way down Cas’ body slowly. He bit the top of his pants and tugged, looking up to meet Cas’ eyes before he started unbuckling his jeans.

Cas looked around like he was nervous someone would see them, but Jagger’s backyard was huge and completely surrounded by woods. They might be in the open, but no one would see them. Something seemed to snap inside of Cas, because he jerked his ass up and started shoving down his jeans. 

Dean only teased a few seconds before diving in and sucking Cas off with every damn trick in the book, hoping he could make him feel even half as good as Cas made him feel. He rocked carefully into Dean’s mouth, keeping his moans low and fisting one hand in Dean’s hair while the other was tugging on his own. 

He didn’t last long either, and came in Dean’s mouth before the movie even started to get good.

Something about swallowing Cas’ come always got his dick going. Regardless of his orgasm that morning, he already needed more. But he got the feeling Cas wouldn’t mind since he was still squirming underneath Dean and he was the one that brought up the lube. “Gonna let me have this ass, sweetheart?” _Fucking need you, baby._

**Castiel**

The thought of Dean actually inside of him had him whimpering, and also quickly changing his mind. He’d sort of wanted to fuck _Dean_ when he’d suggested the lube, not the other way around, but there wasn’t a single part of him that was going to complain. 

His body was still buzzing from the orgasm he’d just had, but he nodded quickly and mumbled, “Mmhm. Take it. Take me.”

Dean grinned and bit the inside of his thigh as he nudged Cas’ legs further apart. “Fuck, Cas... I’ve wanted this ass for so long. Next time you can have mine.”

“Damn right.” _So long? It’s been less than a month… unless…? No, I can’t think about that right now._ Cas gripped his spent cock and held it as he bit his lip, staring down at the most gorgeous man he’d ever seen. “Gods, you look so good between my legs. I can’t wait to see how you look with your ass wrapped around my cock.”

Dean chuckled and grabbed the lube, settling back between his legs and glancing up. “We got another date tomorrow so... it’s all yours sweetheart. For now, I get to see _your_ perky little ass around _my_ cock.” He nudged a lubed finger along the cleft of Cas' ass, their eyes still locked together.

All at once, Cas’ brain caught up with his body. It had been easy to ignore what was happening when it was just cuddling and blowjobs, but this? _I’m about to have sex with my best friend._ Panic spiked through him but subsided as quickly as it came, and Cas smirked. _I’m about to have sex with_ **_Dean._ **“Come on, then. Don’t you think we’ve waited long enough?”

“Hell yeah.” He slid his thick digit inside, smiling at Cas when he squirmed under him. “Goddammit, you’re so tight, sweetheart. Can’t wait to split you open.”

A punched-out, quiet moan escaped Cas as his heavy cock twitched at the words and started filling out again. _It has to be illegal to be that hot._ He let out a sensual chuckle and tilted his head as Dean started fingering him. “The best part of that? I actually believe you’ll split me open. It’s a good thing I ate light today, hm?” 

Dean huffed out a deep laugh and started kissing along Cas’ cock, pushing his fingers deeper and stretching him out. It felt incredible, which gave Cas a pretty good idea of how amazing the real thing was about to be. He rolled his hips, sucking in a breath as Dean added a third and kissed back up his body to his lips. 

A kiss had no right to be that good, but most of Cas’ attention was focused on how Dean’s lips moved with his own, and not the fingers in his ass or the explosion of stars above their heads. 

When he was finally ready, Dean sat up on his knees and started stroking himself, staring down at Cas’ writhing body. “Fuck, you’re gorgeous, Cas.”

“Me?” Cas shook his head, unable to ignore how exquisite Dean looked in the moonlight. “You, Dean. You’re... beautiful.” The word didn’t feel like enough, but it was all he had… except, “Ty siyayesh' yarche vsekh zvezd na nebe.”

“Dunno what that means, but thanks.” Dean chuckled and lined up his slicked cock. “Ready, sweetheart? You want this dick?” He leaned down and nudged his hole, nipping his neck.

Cas frowned temporarily at the fact that Dean didn’t ask what it meant. _Of course he didn’t. It means ‘you shine brighter than all the stars in the sky’, which I know for a fact, because I can see just about every star in the sky. But this isn’t supposed to be romantic, it’s just… sex. Of course he didn’t ask._ He sucked in a breath and laughed, lying through his teeth. “Yes, loosely translated, what I just said was ‘now shut up and fuck me.’ It’s a very common Russian sentiment.” 

“You got it.” Dean bit his lip and pushed in. The second the head was inside, both men groaned and Dean sloppily kissed his way to Cas’ mouth.

Losing himself in the feeling of Dean sliding deeper was easy, but holding himself back was not. He bit Dean’s lip and sucked his tongue as Dean started moving, but Cas wrapped his legs around Dean and flipped them over. 

He leaned back, sinking all the way down and rolling his hips, and Dean laid his head back to stare up in awe. “Cas...” he moaned, his left hand sliding up to grip Cas’ hip and his right gripping his cock.

_Sorry, this is the only way I know of to stop myself from getting lost completely in this._ Cas smirked, tentatively lifting up and slowly sliding back down, watching the flutter of Dean’s eyes and the flex of his muscles. “Feels good, Dean. So good.” He tipped his head toward the sky, braced his hands behind him on Dean’s thighs, then started bouncing. 

Dean continued letting Cas fuck his fist, releasing the most beautiful moans Cas had ever heard him make. “Your ass is the best I’ve ever had, sweetheart.”

If he were still capable of English, he’d have said something in return. But Dean felt so good inside of him, filling him completely, hitting every right spot - that all he could manage were clipped words from the other languages he knew. “Tellement bon… foirfe… non fermarti…” He bit his lip and focused on Dean’s face, moving his hand out of the way to stroke himself as he moved faster and Dean began fucking up into him. 

“Fuck yeah, show me how good it feels for you, sweetheart.” Dean braced himself better and started pounding up into his prostate, and Cas twisted his hand a couple more times. He called out Dean’s name as he came, painting his skin as his ass squeezed Dean’s cock. 

“Ah fu- Cas!” Dean slammed into him, filling up Cas’ ass with a groan so loud it echoed around them. Cas gasped and struggled to draw in air as his body moved, trying to drain Dean of every drop. 

For a moment he stilled, then dropped forward to kiss Dean again before rolling off him with a satisfied huff. “Incredible.” 

“Definitely.” Dean closed his eyes and sighed. “Fuck... shoulda done that years ago.”

“I wasn’t good at it years ago.” Cas chuckled and let out a sharp breath, then sat up and winced. “We might have to raincheck me fucking you, though. I don’t think I’m going to be able to move tomorrow.”

“That’s fine. You can just come to my room and take it whenever you want.” Dean kissed his cheek and stood, walking towards the house.

Cas watched him go with a strange expression, then got up and started gathering everything up. The movie had long since ended and he was suddenly cold without the heat of sex, so he threw his clothes back on before blowing out the candles and folding the blankets. 

It took him a bit, but he finally got it all done and made his way back inside. He needed a shower, but mostly, he was just ready to go home. _What did he mean, ‘whenever I want’? After any date, or legitimately whenever I want?_ He cleared his throat and called out for Dean. _I need to stop trying to make this more than it is. He meant after a date._

After another moment of silence, he called again. “Dean?”

He walked out of the bathroom fully dressed, smiling at Cas as he approached. “Yeah?”

The things that happened in Cas’ chest were likely illegal. “I... are, um... Should we go home or just stay here?”

“Let’s go home. I know you don’t sleep good without your favorite pillow.” Dean kissed his temple and grabbed the things from his hands.

They made their way back to the car, and on the drive home Cas looked over at Dean. “We really didn’t watch much of the movie, did we.”

“Nah, we can put it on at home if you want. It was gonna start getting cold outside.” Dean tapped the steering wheel nervously and then he spoke again. “You wouldn’t change anything about this date, right?”

_Maybe all the parts where my stupid heart wanted to make it more than it was._ Cas shook his head, shifting a little in his seat and smiling at the soreness. “No, I wouldn’t. Would you?”

“Not a thing.” He visibly relaxed and reached over for Cas’ hand. “That was awesome.”

“Awesome indeed. I think that’s the first time I’ve ever spoken all the languages I know.”

“Yeah, what were you really sayin’?” Dean squeezed his hand with a grin. “I know you lied about the first one.”

He blushed, looking out the window like somehow the trees they were passing would save him. “Oh, it’s... hard to remember, exactly.”

“Mmhmm.” Dean brought his hand up to kiss it but instead bit it playfully.

“Damnit.” Cas chuckled and looked over, then rolled his eyes. “The first time, I said ‘you shine brighter than all the stars in the sky’ in Russian. And then... in order, it was something along the lines of ‘so good, perfect, don’t stop’ in French, Irish Gaelic, and Italian... respectively.”

“Wow, you remembered all that? I need to step up my pipe game, huh?” He winked and pulled into their garage.

Cas waited a moment and licked his lips, saying quietly, “I remember every second of it, Dean,” and then getting out of the car. _And I always will._


	15. Caged Heat

**Dean**

_ Holy shit... I fucked Cas. _ Dean laid in his bed that night deeply hoping he didn’t just ruin fucking...  _ everything. _ Cas was the most important person in his life, and he didn’t know what he would do without him. 

He never meant to take advantage of him... and it kind of felt like he was.  _ Cas came to you for help with school, not to fuck him when you know for a fact it’s been so damn long for him. Goddammit!  _

He panicked all night, sleeping about 2 hours total. When he walked downstairs that morning, his hair was nearly Castiel-level fucked, and his eyes were so droopy it was a miracle he could see. Cas was drinking coffee at the kitchen table and Dean grunted his hello, walking straight to the coffee pot. After three long, tongue-burning sips, he walked over to join him. “Mornin’, gorgeous. Is today’s date a nap together?”

“Can it be? I didn’t sleep a whole lot, and it looks like you didn’t, either.” Cas wrapped his hands around his coffee mug and leaned forward. “Are you alright?”

“Mmhmm. Just had weird dreams about hellhounds... think they’re really just chihuahuas?” Dean took another sip and glanced up at Cas.

He tilted his head and hummed. “Well, chihuahuas are certainly evil enough. I wouldn’t be surprised if they were.” Cas paused for a moment and nodded toward the shelf where they kept the book, pointedly keeping his eyes away. “We can either do one where we can stay home, or... we  _ could _ nap together, but... I understand if that’s not something you’re interested in. I suppose there are still lines we shouldn’t cross, hm?”

_ Fuck lines... wait no, that’s what got you here.  _ “Uh, maybe, but we’ve slept in the same bed before. Let’s scratch it and maybe nap beforehand... my bed this time?”  _ Good job, Dean. Enjoy him while you can, because you’re gonna lose your best friend after this. _

Every part of Cas seemed to relax, and he smiled as he got up to grab the book. They picked one to scratch and Cas laughed as he read it out. “I’m starting to see a pattern here, but we have to bake a pie together. The person with less baking experience needs to be blindfolded, and the leader has to help them by using only their hands and a maximum of three instructional sentences.” He flicked his eyes to Dean’s. “Sounds like something we need a nap for.”

“Definitely.” Dean reached over and took his hand without realizing. Losing himself in Cas was so easy, and it felt so natural it may as well have been breathing. Was it really just the book? The dates? The faux romance? Or was it just _them?_ “Bacon first.” He got up quickly to keep busy and shut his brain up.  _ Bacon will fix it... bacon fixes everything. _

Cas closed the book and put it back, then helped him cook breakfast and do the dishes afterward. He looked a little sheepish as he turned back to him and let out a breath. “Ready?”

“Almost.” Dean stepped in and kissed him. He couldn’t help it. Cas told him to just do what felt right, and _this_ felt right. Cas immediately melted into him, gripping the sides of his shirt and letting out a soft noise.

_ Or maybe he feels how you do? Maybe if you keep doing it, you can convince him not to leave you. _ Dean reached down to grip Cas’ ass and slid his tongue into his mouth.

Cas carded his fingers in Dean’s hair and came closer, biting his lip and finally pulling back. “Let’s just go to bed and see what happens, hm?”

“Yeah... bed.” Dean lifted him by his thighs so Cas could straddle him and started walking toward the stairs. He made it halfway up before he was out of breath and realizing that was much harder to do with a man. “This was supposed to be romantic,” he grunted into Cas’ neck.

“It was. Stairs are… hard.” Cas grabbed Dean’s hand and tugged him the rest of the way up the stairs and into Dean’s room, then turned to kiss him again.

Dean was the one to melt into the kiss this time, but he knew what they both truly needed so he pulled back and then led Cas to the bed. "Let's get some sleep and then pick that up when we wake." He opened the covers for Cas and patted his chest. "C- uh... can I hold you, Cas?"

He smiled softly and climbed in, fitting himself against Dean’s body. “I don’t think I’ll ever complain about that. You’re not going to have more dreams about hellish chihuahuas though, are you?”

"No promises." Dean let his eyes flutter closed and sighed, feeling like he might actually get some sleep this time. "If I wake you, just kick me." He placed a kiss on Cas' head and smiled to himself.

They slept a few hours, probably longer than they should have in the middle of the day, but they both needed it. Dean felt Cas stirring first and rolled over to hold him and sleepily kiss along the back of his neck. He knew it was Cas' turn to top, but he already missed that ass, so rutting into him wasn't preventable. 

Unfortunately, nature called and by the time they were washed up and feeling more awake, the mood was already too friendly to slip right back into bed. Dean wouldn't pressure Cas and he knew Cas wouldn't pressure him. They were walking a tightrope here between fake dating and real dating, so neither of them wanted to push.

Once they were downstairs drinking coffee - again - Dean smiled over at Cas and remembered today's date. "Pie! What flavor, sweetheart?"

“We did cherry for the last date involving pie, so maybe apple this time? I think we’ve got everything we need, I was going to bake you one this week, anyway.” Cas started rooting around the cupboards to get what they needed. “Do you want to wear the blindfold this time?”

"Yeah, I'll wear it this time. I used to bake them myself, but you make them better." Dean smiled at him like a lovesick puppy but caught himself in the act that time. He sat back in his chair and grabbed his cellphone as a distraction. "Should I order us a pizza for later? That way we can just focus on pie?"  _ And hopefully sex. _

Cas agreed, so after Dean ordered the pizza, Cas grabbed the blindfold they’d used the previous time and jerked his chin toward Dean. “Take your shirt off. You can keep your pants on, but only because if you don’t, I’ll be too distracted to make a proper pie and you’ll be angry with me.”

"Fine, but only because _pie.”_ Dean shrugged off his shirt and looked down. He was starting to feel flabby from eating so much food and not working out, but based on Cas' face when he looked at his body, it wasn't too bad yet.  _ Thank god my job is hard labor. Love it when he looks at me like I'm food. _

Almost as though he couldn’t help it, Cas came over and ran his hand down Dean’s chest and dipped down to kiss just above his nipple. “Okay. I can only give you three verbal instructions, so you’ll have to trust my hands.” He held up the blindfold and smiled softly. “Are you ready?”

"Yup." Dean leaned in and let him blindfold him and guide him towards the already prepped station. "Alright, so like... three the whole time? That means don't ask many questions? Or can I ask and we figure out another way to communicate?"

“If the question is directly related to what you’re supposed to do, then we’ll have to find another way to communicate. If it’s unrelated to pie-making, I can answer.” He slid his hands down the length of Dean’s arms and laughed quietly. “This is going to be hard, you’re so much bigger than me... I can barely see around you.”

"I think that's why it's good. We need to work together all the time, even when it's difficult." Dean blushed at how that sounded, but he felt it was true. The boat was difficult, and that whole experience was a fail. They needed to know they could be a team even when the going was tough. "Alright, I got an idea to keep from talking too much. Imma reach for something and if it is the wrong thing, pinch my nipple, and if it’s right, rub my tummy or something sweet."  _ God, you're turning into a marshmallow. _

Cas was silent for a moment, and then ghosted his lips over the back of Dean’s neck. “Like that?”

Dean shivered and bared his neck. "M'kay." He reached forward and quickly found one of the measuring cups. "This the right size?"

Silence, then a light tweak to his right nipple. Cas’ hand covered his own and moved it slightly, and when Dean closed his fingers, Cas once again kissed the back of his neck.

He smiled, liking how all of it felt.  _ This had to be how Cas felt with that damn pottery stuff... but at least this time we can lick it off each other.  _ Dean reached out for what he thought was the flour, his hand hovering near the bag. "Flour?"

A slightly harder tweak and another shift of his hand. Trying to measure without being able to see was a bitch, but with Cas’ help, he was pretty sure he got the right amount into the bowl. Cas traced his nails lightly down Dean’s side. “Good, Dean. Good.”

Dean hummed at the praise and he realized he really was just a damn puppy. Hell, he'd sleep at the end of Cas' bed if he let him. The process was slow, and Dean should have picked something besides nipple pinching, because before they were even done, his nipples were hard and they weren't alone. His dick had woken up ten minutes prior but was thankfully hidden by the counter.

“This is surprisingly easy... maybe the trick was communication all along.” Cas helped him roll out the dough for the crust and then cleared his throat. “Turn around and kiss me. There’s direction number one.”

_ Shit... he's about to see just how into this pie making I am. _ Dean turned around and kissed him, his back arched slightly so his dick wasn't stabbing Cas in his stomach.

Cas placed his hands on Dean’s cheeks and deepened it, then pulled back and chuckled softly. “Good morning, Seger.” He gripped Dean’s hips, turned him back around, then continued moving Dean’s hands to keep going.

"Sorry... Seger likes pie." Dean blushed and pushed his ass back into Cas' crotch. 

For the first time, he noticed Cas was hard too. Cas sucked in a breath as Dean’s ass rubbed against him, and he bit Dean’s neck. “We’re almost done.”

"Mmhmm..." Dean moved his hips in a small circle. "Cas. Want you to fuck me here in our kitchen."  _ I need you. _

He froze, then pushed Dean forward until he was bent over the counter and rutted against him. “You have no idea how badly I want to do exactly that, but we need to get the pie in the oven first.” Cas moved his hand away from Dean’s shoulders and Dean stood with a grunt. 

"Okay. Does it look pretty yet?" Dean touched along the top and thought it felt ready enough. He'd eat it regardless.

“Yes, we just need to cover it with crust and put it into the oven.” Cas helped him through it, and was exceedingly careful when they actually put it into the oven. When the door shut, he used Dean’s finger to set the electronic timer. “It’s in, do you think that counts?”

"I think we did awesome." Dean reached up for the blindfold. “Can I take this off yet?"

Cas stopped his hands and hummed. “No, not yet. Turn around.” Dean heard the clink of a metal can, and the moment he turned to face him, Cas wiped pie filling over one of his nipples and started sucking it off.

“Ah, fuck...” He reached to grip the counter ledge and gasped. “I swear you have the mouth of an angel.”

He rolled Dean’s nipple between his teeth and then gave the same treatment to the other one before smearing a line of filling down Dean’s torso. Cas took his time licking up the mess he made, and then dropped to his knees, mouthing over Dean’s clothed crotch. “Do you still want me inside you, Dean?”

“Hell yeah, Cas. Want you to fill me up.” Dean wished he was completely naked and open already. “Don’t even want you to open me, Cas. Just fuck me.”

Cas kissed his way back up and gently removed Dean’s blindfold. “No, I’m not going to do that. I’m not going to hurt you, Dean. I would never. So, either we take our time and do this right, or we find another way to get each other off.” He kissed him sweetly and wrapped his arms around his waist. “Please tell me you understand.”

Dean released a shaky breath and nodded. "I'll be good. I'll be patient." He reached down and gripped Cas' rock hard length, earning himself a lusty moan. "Need this."

“Then stay here and take off your pants, I’ll be right back.” He disappeared up the stairs and returned a couple minutes later, naked, and with the lube in his hand. He found Dean bent over the counter. 

It seemed Cas was as brutally impatient as Dean was, because he feverishly kissed over his lower back and ass cheeks as he slicked his fingers and warmed the lube, then guided a single digit in almost too fast. 

“Gods, I can’t wait to be inside of you.” Cas bit his ass then spread him open, nudging in a second finger and groaning as he started to move them. “You’re so tight, Dean. When was the last time you bottomed for anyone?”

“Fuck…” Dean groaned and forced out a breath to relax. “Like two years.” He took a moment to think about it. He hadn’t previously realized how long it had been.

His words seemed to remind Cas he needed to be careful, so he slowed down and added a little more lube. It took  _ way  _ too damn long, and by the time Cas was moving three in and out with ease, Dean was ready to beg for it. 

“Almost there. Hang on, baby.” His ass became empty as Cas stood to slick himself, his breathing already ragged. Dean braced himself over the counter and Cas gently kicked his feet a little further apart, then let his free hand roam over Dean’s body. After one quick smack to his ass, Cas was finally easing his way inside him with a moan so sinful it was almost cruel. 

Dean forced his body to relax. Cas felt so goddamn good he was already seeing stars and could tell he wasn’t going to last as long as he hoped. But based on how he could feel Cas coming unglued behind him, he wasn’t either. When he finally bottomed out, they groaned together. “Fuck… so full, Cas… so good.”

Firm hands rubbed all over Dean’s back and shoulders as Cas rolled his hips and began grinding against him, so damn deep it was unreal. He was gasping. Every movement caused him to get a little louder, a little more desperate. 

Dean pushed back again and reached down to grip his own length. “C’mon, baby. Fuck me.” His cock was leaking in his hand, begging for release - but it wouldn’t happen until Cas was pounding his prostate. Cas’ movement’s were excruciatingly teasing and every time he ghosted against Dean’s sweet spot he fought the urge to cry out.

“Fuck, Dean… I can still feel you from yesterday. That’s so fucking hot.” Cas gripped his hips hard enough to bruise and started slamming into him, and the sudden force had Dean’s free hand lurching forward to grip the other side of the counter and knocking the mixing bowl to the floor. 

For some reason, knowing they made a mess only spurred him on. He wanted to feel Cas tomorrow, too. He wanted them both to be sore tonight while they ate pie. Dean braced himself securely and tossed his hips back to meet Cas’. “Good, make me feel it too, sweetheart.”

Speed and roughness like that shouldn’t have been possible from his nerdy, smaller best friend, but he was pounding into him so hard Dean was sure he’d feel it for a month. Cas let out a guttural grunt and shifted just enough that they both became moaning, gasping messes, and Cas reached up to pull Dean’s hair. “You feel… so… I’m… fuck!” Cas bottomed out, coming with a growl and pulling Dean up so their bodies were flush. He sucked a mark on the back of Dean’s neck and wrapped his arms around him, still moving. 

Dean was practically boneless and he hadn’t even come yet. His hand sped up to match Cas’ thrusts and he decided not to fight it anymore, he released into his fist with a grunt.

Cas slowed, trailing his hands down Dean’s skin and dropping his forehead to Dean’s shoulder. He was breathing heavily, still clearly a mess, but the sweat coating them both was making it hard to stay close together. The heat from the oven wasn’t helping anyone, and Cas pulled back slowly. “We still have ten minutes before the pie is done. Come sit with me? I don’t think my legs are going to work for much longer.”

“M‘kay.” He nodded feverishly and wiped his hand on a paper towel from the counter. “Let’s go.”

They made it to the couch and collapsed together, Dean laying flat and Cas splaying himself across him, trailing gentle kisses over his skin. “You’re amazing, Dean. Every part of you. I just... wanted you to know that.”

“Feel the same about you, Cas.” Dean canted his hips and bit his lip.  _ All yours, baby... _ He was too far gone to linger on that thought for long.

When the timer dinged, they were both half asleep. Cas stirred, glancing toward the kitchen with bleary eyes. “Stay. I’ll go take it out, but I want to come right back here.” He groaned as he stood, nearly tripping over the coffee table then disappeared into the kitchen. 

Dean was only able to grunt a response, still trying to wake up from the haze of amazing sex. When Cas made his way back, he was finally able to use words. “How’s it look?”

“Almost as edible as you.” Cas smirked and climbed back onto the couch, sliding his leg between Dean’s and plastering himself to his side. “But not quite.”

Dean huffed a laugh and leaned in for a kiss, feeling as though he never wanted these date nights to end. “Will you sleep with me again? In my bed?” he asked with a blush. 

Cas let out a breath and buried his face pretty much in Dean’s armpit. “Yes. Thank you for asking. I wasn’t sure how to... ask.”

“Just ask, Cas. Always.” Dean ran his fingers down the side of Cas’ face. “You can ask me anything.”

His eyes fluttered closed and he melted a little closer. “Okay. I do have  _ one  _ question… where the hell is that pizza we ordered?”


	16. Point of No Return

**Castiel**

Monday was a drag. He was exhausted from the weekend, and waking up with Dean already gone had him feeling heavy. Charlie didn’t show up to school, so at least he put  _ that  _ conversation off for another day, but a mere twelve dates in and he was already contemplating calling the whole thing off.  _ I shouldn’t do anything without getting an outside opinion.  _

He made dinner for Dean and had it on the table when he walked in the door. Cas smiled at him and nodded to his boots. “Take those off, but come eat before you take a shower. It didn’t take quite as long as I thought it would and I want you to eat while it’s still hot.”

“The food, or you?” Dean winked and then took off his boots. “Was that a bad joke? I think it was.” He walked over and grabbed a water out of the fridge, then went to join Cas.

Maybe he was being selfish, but he’d intentionally gotten dinner ready early. Any chance he could get to keep Dean dirty… he’d take. “I don’t care  _ what _ you eat, as long as you eat. And yes, almost all of your jokes are bad, but… that’s why I like them.”

Dean looked over, completely offended.  _ “All?!  _ Pfft. My jokes are awesome.” He leaned in and sniffed the air. “Mmm,  _ smells _ awesome, Cas.”

_ So do you. _ Cas shuddered a little bit and then chastised himself for it.  _ Completely inappropriate.  _ He took a bite and tried to distract himself with actually eating, but all he could seem to focus on were Dean’s dirty hands.  _ Fuck. It’s not a date night, but I want those hands on me. _

Dean inhaled his dinner as always then got up to clean the kitchen. “Thanks, sweetheart. Normally I’m about to pass out in the shower.”

“Can’t have that, now can we? I can start having dinner ready earlier, it’s not a problem.”  _ It’s the exact opposite of a problem, unless of course me wanting to fuck the hell out of my best friend is considered problematic. _

“Nah, don’t worry about it. Whenever you can is fine, babe.” He finished up and then walked back by Cas. “I felt you all day at work.” He bit his lip and stared straight into Cas’ eyes. “Just thought you’d want to know.”

Fighting the urge to kiss Dean was making him dizzy. “I could still feel you, too. Walking around campus was… interesting.” He swallowed, pulling his gaze away and staring at the floor. “I think we’ll need to do that again the next time we have back-to-back dates.”

Dean finally looked away. “Yeah... sounds good. I’ll just go shower.” He walked away before Cas could respond.

_ What just happened?  _ Cas wrapped his arms around himself and made his way to the couch, curling up against the arm.  _ You know what happened, he probably didn’t like feeling you all day, and when you suggested it happen again, he shut down. Just… back the fuck off. He’s doing you a huge favor by helping with this project, and all you’ve done is take advantage of that.  _

Dean came down a while later and sat down next to Cas on the couch. He broke the silence soon after, asking Cas about their next date. “So… tomorrow’s your birthday... Are we doin’ a date night? No pressure, I mean... if you had someone else you’d rath-”

“Dean.” Cas held up his hand to cut him off and smiled softly. “Date or no date, there’s no one I’d rather spend a birthday with than you. Not to mention, it’s a Tuesday. It’s not as though there will be a whole lot of options.” The fact that Dean was considering it at all made him smile. “Not to mention, if we have another date... I’m virtually guaranteed birthday sex. Right?”  _ For fuck’s sake, Castiel. Way to figure out you were being unfair, and then turn around and do it again less than ten minutes later. _

Dean chuckled and leaned over so they were flushed together. “Course. You can have this ass all day.”

“Mm. If only I didn’t have school and you didn’t have to work, hm?” Cas’ fingers twitched with the urge to reach out for Dean’s hand. “I suppose I’ll settle for a night.”

~~~~

Ketch droned on about the recursiveness and reciprocity of intimacy. “Understanding that the more one shares with a partner, the more it fosters the level of comfort necessary for their partner to share things in return is tantamount. As we’ve discussed previously, intimacy is not the alpha and omega of a successful relationship, but there is something to be said of the overall benefits. This extends further than romantic relationships. Extensive research indicates that those of us who experience intimate relationships with friends, family, or yes, partners, are often happier, healthier, and more successful.” 

_ Of course they are. Intimacy is the very anti of loneliness. One often thrives on the other’s absence.  _ Cas tapped his finger on the desk and thought about his own relationships. He felt he had a certain, surface-level of intimacy with Charlie, and more or less the same with his father. He could open up to both of them to a degree, and then there was Jimmy. Once upon a time, Jimmy was his confidant. He never felt the need to hide from him or sugarcoat his vulnerability. Jimmy accepted him as-is, no questions asked… until he didn’t. But there was little doubt about the present-day relationship that held the most intimacy.  _ Dean. I can tell him anything and I know he’ll be supportive of me. And I know he feels the same, he’s shared things with me that he wouldn’t dream of sharing with others. But that begs the question… as we dive deeper into Pathokinesis, will it continue to foster a level of comfort between us and strengthen our friendship, or will we cross too many lines to ever go back?  _

“Mr. Novak?”

Cas jerked as Ketch’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts. “Hm?”

“We’ve now heard from some of our more… traditionally  _ masculine  _ students on the importance of intimacy in their own relationships. How would you rank it in regards to your own?”

_ Shit.  _ Cas licked his lips and sat up a little straighter. “It’s incredibly important. Intimacy isn’t always the way it’s shown on TV. It doesn’t have to be so… sappy. But without intimacy, how can you ever be sure you’re truly  _ partners, _ and not just… mutually physically-invested strangers? Lust comes naturally. Intimacy does not, and in my experience… it makes all the difference in the world.”  _ Did that even make sense? What the hell is going on in my brain, and why can’t I stop drawing comparisons to Dean?  _

_ Oh right, because I had sex with Dean twice and all it did was prove to me I didn’t know the meaning of the word before him.  _

_ This is getting out of hand.  _

~~~~

After class, he made his way to the food court to meet Charlie, bracing himself with every step.  _ This is going to be a disaster, I just know it.  _ Sighing heavily, he got his food and took his seat, then attempted a genuine smile as she made her way over and plopped down. “Hello, Charlie. I haven’t seen you in a couple of weeks.”

“Ugh! This semester just got harder didn’t it? How are you? Are you okay? You look... somber.” She reached for his hand.

He squeezed hers briefly and let go, huffing a small laugh at how right she was — and how ridiculous it was that she  _ was _ correct. “Yes, it’s been... strange. Classes are getting harder, I had sex with Dean, I tried to call Jimmy...”

Her eyes bugged out of her head and she stopped mid-bite. “What?!?” She set down her sandwich. “Okay, we have to talk about all of that, but let’s go in order and don’t dwell on the school stuff. Are you passing all of your classes?” They discussed school for a couple of minutes and he could tell she was eager to get to the more interesting question. When their class conversation came to a natural end, she instantly jumped on item number two; Dean. “Okay, holy fuck... now let’s talk about your damn roommate... What?!”

“Charlie, I... I don’t know what to say. Things had been getting more and more heated between us, and we... we had sex. Saturday. And then again Sunday. And... will probably do it again tonight, though I’m gathering this is a ‘birthday sex’ kind of thing.” He fidgeted with his thumb nail and stared at his drink cup. “And before you ask, yes. It was incredible.”

“Of course it is. If anyone looked  _ that  _ good and sucked in the sack, they’d be an abomination.” She sighed, “Cas... I can see what it’s doing to you. Maybe you should tell him what you truly want.”

_ And what if I don’t know what that is?  _ Cas avoided her eyes as his eyebrows pinched. “It’s just a project, Charlie. Sure, we’re… taking it a little further than the book calls for, but it’s to be expected. Throw two young, attractive people into romantic settings over and over again, and the end result will almost certainly be sex. We’re friends, not… dead.” 

“Look me in the eyes and say that again. Tell me that’s all it is, Cas.” Her tone was almost sad, like she pitied him.

The second they made eye contact, Cas deflated. “I’m terribly afraid, Charlie. We’re roughly a quarter of the way through this project, and I’m already… I’m already in love with him.” The admission made him laugh. A sarcastic, almost bitter thing. “Fuck.” 

Charlie offered a soft smile, “Cas, you’ve _been_ in love with him. You both have, it’s just taken this to show you. It’s okay to fall in love.”

He shook his head. “He’s Dean Winchester. He’s not in love with me. He’s just… making the most of things since I told him he can’t sleep with anyone else. I should do the responsible thing and just call the rest of this off. I feel… dirty. Like I’m violating him, because we’re not on the same page.”

She chuckled. “You’re lucky you have your looks, Cas. Talk to him. Don’t call it off without talking about it. Isn’t this a communication class?”

“Sort of. But I can’t. I can’t tell him I’m calling it off because I’m in love with him, it’ll ruin our friendship. He’ll tell me it doesn’t matter and that if I’m okay with being friends still, so is he. But he’ll gradually start pulling back. He won’t come home for dinner as often, he’ll be careful about how he touches me… how he looks at me, how he speaks to me. He’ll tell himself he’s doing those things so he doesn’t lead me on, but things would never be the same again.” The thought made him immeasurably sad, which was not something he wanted to feel on his birthday. “I’ll… I’ll tell him something. At some point. Eventually. Just… not today.”

“No. It’s your birthday. Speaking of...” She reached into her backpack and pulled out a small gift. “Happy birthday.”

He smiled as he unwrapped it, revealing a coffee mug with a picture of a brain, which read ‘It’s My Job To Judge You’. Cas laughed loudly, leaning over to hug her across the small table. “Thank you, Charlie. It’s brilliant.” 

“Because you’re brilliant.” She smiled and went back to her sandwich. “You’ll figure it out, just make sure I'm the best man at the wedding.”

She’d deserve it, if such a thing ever occurred… but Cas wasn’t optimistic. “We’ll see.”

~~~~

When he walked into their townhouse, the first thing he noticed was the sound of  _ Unchained Melody  _ coming out of Dean’s record player. The vinyl cover had a huge, blue bow on it, and the rest of the living room was decorated with candles and the lanterns they’d bought for their outdoor movie date. 

Cas swallowed thickly, already knowing he wasn’t mentally or emotionally prepared for any of this. He shut the door behind him and toed off his shoes. “Dean?”

“Hey there, sweetheart.” Dean walked out of the kitchen, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. “You know, I considered taking you to that new fancy restaurant and only ordering desert because we all know the food is gonna be nasty. Then we’d go to Taco Bell, eat fifteen tacos, and probably fuck in the parking lot. But... instead, I thought we’d just stay here... together... speaking  _ our _ love language.” He blushed and then rushed out, ”That was lame sounding. I mean like... touching each other. Just... holding each other.” Dean reached out his hand, staring straight into Cas’ soul. “Is that okay?”

Doing anything other than nodding dumbly was out of the question, and Cas didn’t expect himself to pull it off. He took Dean’s hand and moved closer, fully aware of how insanely, stupidly romantic the situation was — despite the fact that it wasn’t a Pathokinesis date.  _ Was Charlie right? Does he love me too, or… is this just his way of keeping up the ruse between dates?  _ “It’s perfect, Dean. It’s perfect.” 

“Yeah?” He grinned wide as he wrapped his arms around Cas. “I was nervous it was too cheesy. You hear your gift? I know you said it sounded a ‘gazillion times better on vinyl’ and how you wished you had it... I found it. Took a couple weeks, but… it’s all yours.” Dean led him to the record player to see the cover.

Cas picked it up gingerly and closed his eyes to listen more clearly. “It’s the crackle. Do you hear it? The small pops that make it sound… worn in, like a beloved pair of slippers, or… love itself.” He turned his attention to Dean and reached out, gently squeezing his arm. “Thank you.” 

“You’re welcome, birthday boy. I hear exactly what you mean.” Dean moved to stand behind Cas and rest his chin on his shoulder while they swayed. “You hungry?”

Now that he was paying attention, he could smell something delicious coming from the kitchen. “Dean… are you making me baked ziti?”

“Yeah... well, I hope I am. I downloaded this app called Pinterest, and it has recipes on it. Like copy cat recipes from your favorite restaurants and stuff. It’s pretty cool, you should get it. Anyway, they had it from that restaurant we went to after graduation, so I thought I’d try it. I remember you saying how good it was.”

The effort Dean had put into all of this was overwhelming, and Cas was suddenly glad Dean was behind him and couldn’t see his face. He hugged the record sleeve to his chest and turned his head, quickly kissing Dean’s temple. “Thank you, Dean. You constantly surprise me.” 

“Good. Does it surprise you that I made birthday pie and not cake? Cause it shouldn’t.”

Warmth and laughter replaced all the feelings of uneasiness he’d had while talking to Charlie. “No, it doesn’t surprise me.” He turned to face Dean as the song changed and reached up to brush a thumb over his cheek. “I take it we’re rescheduling our book date? I’d hate to let all of  _ this  _ go to waste.” 

“Yeah, we’ll do it tomorrow. I wanted to improvise. Is there a dealer's choice in that book at all?”

Cas shook his head slowly. “I don’t know. Not that I can tell, but... maybe somewhere.”  _ If there was, I’d already be kissing you silly. _ “I suppose I’ll have to wait until tomorrow to properly thank you.”

“Okay, but you don’t gotta wait... if you didn’t want. It’s your birthday, you make the rules.” Dean kissed his neck, and it sent a shiver straight down Cas’ spine.

“Mm. You make a very... very convincing argument, but it’ll have to wait until this album is over.” He grinned, turning around to flip it to side two. “We still have roughly fifteen minutes, and then dinner.”

“You got it, boss.” Dean swayed to  _ See That Girl,  _ keeping his lips to himself for once but Cas could hear him humming along.

Cas watched him for a moment and went to pour them each a glass of wine, coming back and handing one to Dean. “It’s my birthday, and wine makes you giggly. It’s adorable. Just… humor me.”

“Gross.” Dean huffed a laugh and took the wine, holding it out for a toast. “Let’s get giggly, baby.”

They clinked glasses and Cas took a sip, mentally trying to work out the pros and cons of actually  _ thanking  _ Dean after dinner.  _ He gave me permission, and yet… won’t this just be another example of me taking advantage of him? He's always had a thing about birthday sex. If he thinks I can’t get it elsewhere because of the terms of our agreement… is he just offering because he feels bad? Or does he want this as badly as I do? _

He remained lost in those thoughts through the remainder of that first glass of wine, and when  _ You’ll Never Walk Alone  _ started, Cas’ chest tightened.  _ I won’t, and neither will he… provided I keep these ridiculous emotions in check.  _

Dean polished off his wine and handed Cas the cup. “See, I already gotta pee. Goddamn grape juice.” He turned and ran upstairs as if they didn’t have a downstairs bathroom, and Cas took a moment to decompress. 

Closing his eyes, Cas finished off his own glass and let the song work its way through him until he was moving to the music without even realizing it.  _ ‘Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart, and you’ll never walk alone.’  _ He smiled to himself, huffing quietly and turning in a slow circle, and he opened his eyes to see Dean standing at the bottom of the stairs, watching. 

He smiled as he approached and as the song faded out, he held out both hands as  _ Guess Who  _ began. “Dance with me, Cas.”

Taking his hands and molding to him felt as easy as breathing, and he rested his cheek against Dean’s shoulder. They shifted, Cas’ arms wrapped around Dean’s middle with Dean holding him close. “This song is beautiful.”

“So are you.” Dean dropped his face to Cas’ neck, so he could whisper in his ear. “Happy birthday, sweetheart.”

It was easily the best birthday he’d ever had, and it wasn’t even a competition. Cas sang along softly as they swayed, “Someone weeps eternally, guess who… someone who wants your love desperately, guess who…” he trailed off as Dean kissed his forehead, and the rest of the song got lost to the smell and feel of Dean, and how safe Cas felt in his arms.

_ ‘Open your heart, surely then you’ll see… that someone who cares, is me.’ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s hard to believe today is my 6 month anniversary posting on here. I appreciate all of you more than I can say!


	17. Heart

**Dean**

Cas’ birthday turned out differently than Dean anticipated. He absolutely expected Cas to want birthday sex, and when he didn’t, it helped Dean snap out of it.  _ If he wanted more, he would have done it. You offered. _

By the time Dean got home from work Wednesday, he had pushed all the negative thoughts out of his mind, because he wouldn’t let those ruin date night.  _ This is for Cas, stop bein’ a damn girl about it for five friggin minutes. _ He took a breath and walked inside with a smile. “Date niiight!” he called out, wondering where Cas was.

As it turned out, Cas came in the sliding glass door a moment later, shirtless and covered in sweat. “Hey! Sorry, I lost track of time.” He pulled his headphones out of his ears and set his iPod on the counter. “I… went for a run.” 

Dean’s eyes traveled down his frame and he had to force them to his eyes. “Was it... a good run?”  _ Can we get any lamer, Dean? _

“It served its purpose, I suppose. Did you yell something about date night?” Cas was still breathing heavy, but moved a little closer while wiping the back of his neck.

“Yup. We had our own date yesterday, but today is book date... unless you don’t wanna?”

Cas closed the distance between them quickly. “I absolutely want to, and it starts right now.” He threw his arms around Dean and kissed him hard, backing him up toward the stairs.

Dean opened willingly. Cas smelled amazing after a run. He could still smell the faint scent of his cologne, but most of it was all Cas. They were both dirty, so Dean figured why not have some dirty sexy time on the stairs? 

He shoved Cas’ shorts down and reached between them to rub along his length. “Fuck... I missed your dick.”  _ What was it? Three days? Get a grip, Romeo. _

“Shit.” Cas seemed to realize they weren’t going to make it to a bedroom and laid back on the stairs, kicking off his boxers while Dean struggled to get his boots and jeans off. He leaned forward, hovering over Cas and kissing him again as Cas wrapped a meaty, thick hand around them both and started stroking. 

It was hard to tell which was more desperate; Cas’ hand or their mouths, eagerly devouring each other like they were starved. 

Cas grunted, lifting his hips off the carpet and grinding against him as precome coated his hand. “Fuck, Dean…” He dropped his head back and Dean sucked on his neck as he rutted into Cas’ hand, the taste of his sweat turning him on in ways it had no damn right to. 

“Gonna come for me, sweetheart?” Dean braced his hands on the stair above Cas’ shoulders, thrusting faster as Cas started to come apart. 

He nodded feverishly, using both hands and picking up the pace until he was coming with Dean’s name on his lips, coating his already damp shirt. The added slickness felt so damn good that Dean only lasted a few more moments before he was adding to the mess and biting Cas’ shoulder hard enough to draw blood. 

Laughing quietly, Cas kissed his jaw. “Well, that’s… not quite what I had in kind, but damn. I’m certainly not going to complain.”

“Me either.” Dean reluctantly pulled back, standing up and helping Cas to his feet. His arms felt like jelly after working all day and holding himself up there, but it was worth it. Everything with Cas was always worth it. “We need showers.” 

He nodded, but glanced toward the bookshelf. “We should scratch the date first, just so we know how fast we need to get ready. It  _ is  _ a weeknight.” 

Dean agreed, and when they picked a page, Cas sighed. “This page is all double dates. Should we invite Jask and Ares?”

“Yeah, I’ll give J a call.” Dean put his boxers back on and fished his phone from his pocket, then called him. 

“D, I was just about to eat. What’s up?”

“Hey, y’know that project I’m helpin’ Cas with? We need to go on a double date. Guess who gets to be the other couple?” Dean clicked his tongue and grinned, imagining his friend’s eye roll. 

“Oh, you mean the project that you won’t shut up about? The project that lets you date Cas without  _ actually  _ having to admit how in love you are? That one?”

Dean blushed and nearly dropped his phone. “I’m not — damnit, J.” He turned away from Cas, grateful he didn’t have it on speaker. “Will you two get over here or what? You can eat first, we both gotta shower.”

“Can’t tonight, Ares has shit to do. What about Friday?” He paused for a half second. “Oh, and D… I don’t wanna hear about you two being covered in each other’s jizz, alright?”

Clenching his jaw, Dean flicked his eyes back toward Cas, who was tilting his head and watching him.  _ Goddamnit.  _ “Friday’s great, asshat. See you then.” He hung up, taking a deep breath and facing Cas again. “Gotta scratch a different one for now, but we’ll do that one Friday. Try page eleven.”

Cas nodded, looking like he wanted to ask what all that was about, but didn’t. He scratched the date off and laughed quietly. “Oh, this will be good. We need to go get some kind of large canvases and paint, dress up as classy as we can… put on classical music, drink wine, and speak like we’re from the 1800’s while we paint portraits of each other.” 

“Oh, god. Guess we outta wake snakes in the dining room, eh?” Dean asked with an old-timey accent.

He hadn’t seen that bitchface in a long, long time. “I don’t... have any idea what that means, but I’m going to take a shower. We can probably get the art supplies from Ares.”

“Go get clean, chuckaboo.” Dean slapped his ass and jogged up stairs before he could reply. 

Dean showered fast and then called J again. “Good evening, gigglemug, I need another favor.”

“What in the fuck did you just call me?”

Dean laughed so hard he had to wipe the tears from his eyes. “It means you’re a goofy fuck. We need art supplies, tell Ares I’ll pay so I don’t have to go to the store.”

“I’ll give them to you for free if you promise to never call me anything like that again. Come over, he’s not here, so… just take whatever you need.”

“I ain’t no foozler, guy. I pay my way and I won’t take no for an answer.” He brought back the accent just to annoy. “I’m kidding, don’t make me pay. See you in a few.”

Jask groaned and hung up on him, and Dean threw on some sweats and slippers and went over. He didn’t want to dress up yet, he wanted it all to be at the house first. He knocked loudly. “Open up, I know you’re in there. Don’t be sellin’ me no dogs, eh, Jaskier?”  _ Not droppin’ this accent all damn night. _

He threw open the door and stepped aside. “I  _ will  _ shoot you. Go, take what you need, I put some stuff in the living room I don’t think he’ll miss. Hurry up, I wanna rub one out before he gets back home.”

“Don’t mind me...” Dean walked in slow. “C’mon, J, don’t be pigeon-livered now, take it out.”

“Jesus Christ. Don’t you have a roommate to fuck? Now you wanna watch me jack off?” He crossed his arms and leaned against the fridge. “Not going well, huh?”

“It’s actually going great... maybe too great? I dunno. Guess we’ll see how bad we fucked up in a few months.” Dean grabbed some canvas paper and a couple paints. “Don’t you have a live-in boyfriend, and you still wanna jack it? I’m not assuming  _ you _ guys aren’t doin’ well. Why would you think that?”  _ And why did you get all weird about it, idiot? Now he has questions. I can see it all over his damn face. _

“Uh... I last longer when I jack off first. Not that... this is a conversation I want to be having with you.” Jask raised an eyebrow and walked back toward the door. “As for the rest of it, I just didn’t think you’d actually have the balls to make a move on Cas and I thought razzing you about it would help. Guess my efforts are unnecessary.”

“Yeah... kinda too late.” Dean walked out. “Thanks, I’ll return the paint Friday.”

He walked back a little too slow, thinking about way too much, but he once again cleared his mind and went upstairs to dress.

He wasn’t in the mood for a full suit.  _ Would Cas get mad if I walk out in slacks and a bow tie? Probably not. He thinks I’m adorable. _ Dean walked out and saw Cas’ door was already open, so he assumed he was downstairs. “Where is my sweetling?” he called out from the top.

The sound of classical music answered instead of Cas, and when Dean made his way down the stairs and rounded the corner, he saw Cas in a full, fitted suit. He smirked slightly at the look on Dean’s face. “I’m right here.” He took in Dean’s appearance and leaned forward with an excited expression. “Nice...  _ gas-pipes.” _

Dean bit back a laugh at his adorably  _ awful _ accent but kept it going. “You got me all goo-goo eyed, turtledove.” He ran the back of his hand down Cas’ cheek.  _ Fuck... I’m... fallin’ for Cas.  _ Dean leaned in and kissed him to shut his brain up.

Cas pulled back, breathless and flushed. “I’m glad you think goo-goo eyed is a compliment, because I’m a terrible painter.” He touched Dean’s bow tie and shook his head with a soft smile. “I should’ve known your version of ‘classy’ was  _ Chippendale.” _

“They’re classy, Cas. All above-the-waist touching, but... those rules don’t apply to the likes ‘a you.” Dean winked and clicked his tongue. “I’m terrible too, we’ll be terrible together.”

“Aren’t we always?” Cas kissed him gently and then helped him set up the canvas and paints. “Okay. Who’s first?”

Once they were set up, Dean checked Cas out again and bit his lip. “Dunno how I’m supposed to concentrate with you lookin’ like that, but if you wanna boss me around a little tonight... I wouldn’t fight ya.” He wiggled his eyebrows and yelled at his inner monologue to shut it before it even started. Nothing was going to ruin this date.

**Castiel**

Bossing Dean around sounded like a fantastic idea, but they had a date to get through. He let out a melancholy sigh at the fact that he’d have to wait to lick every inch of Dean’s skin, and sat down behind the canvas. “Pose for me.”

“Pose for you? Like one of your French girls?” He grinned and pointed at the couch. “No really, where do you want me?”

Cas wasn’t the least bit surprised by Dean’s dumb Titanic joke, but he smiled all the same. “Is ‘everywhere, all the time’ a valid option?” He dipped his brush and bit his lip as he considered his choices, then nodded to where Dean had been pointing. “Sit. Spread your legs a little bit.” He then added sarcastically, “I know this will be extremely difficult for you, but try to look sexy.” 

Dean rolled his eyes but did as told. “I call this one the Blue Steel.” He did the most over the top smolder and Cas fought the urge to throw paint at him.

“Thank you.” Cas put an honest effort into painting him, but he hadn’t been lying when he said he wasn’t very good. Add in the fact that Dean was inhumanly gorgeous, and he truthfully had no hope in painting him with any sort of realism. Not to mention the rapidly developing erection he had just from looking at Dean for so long. 

He slowed as he got further along, just enjoying the chance to stare at Dean unabashedly. Dean was getting bored, that much was clear. His eyes wandered around the room, probably counting the twinkle lights that were still hanging throughout the house but when he looked back to meet Cas’ eyes, he smiled. “Hi.”

“Hello, Dean.” Cas kept painting, finishing Dean’s body and starting on a background just to buy himself time.  _ If I can barely handle watching him, how am I going to sit still with him watching me? _

“How’s it goin’, darlin’? I wanna see it now.” Dean practically pouted. “Shoulda sprawled out on the couch like I planned.”

Knowing it would never be up to his standards, Cas turned the easel around to show Dean the mostly finished product. “I think that’s as good as it gets.”

Dean walked closer to look at it and grinned. “Aww, even got the bow tie. You made me look more ripped than I am, though.” He ruffled Cas’ hair and placed a kiss on his cheek. “My turn.”

“I couldn’t get the shading right. I’m not good at this.” He stood, fixing his hair that he’d tried very hard to tame for this and flipped the album. “Chopin was always one of my favorites. Now… where do  _ you  _ want  _ me?” _

“Naked and on my dick.” He gallic shrugged. “Hey, you asked. Just sit right here, I want to do a close up of that gorgeous face.”

A shudder ran through Cas and he absolutely wanted to do that, but… a date was a date. He pulled a chair up by Dean and sat down, fidgeting with his hands. “Is this close enough?”

“Mmhmm.” Dean cracked his neck and started painting. “This is kinda hard. I haven’t used a paint brush since like junior year.”

“See? And you were rushing me.” Cas got a little more comfortable in his chair and let his eyes wander around their living room. “What do you think the double date will be?”

“I dunno.” Dean leaned in with a frown to focus and then sat back up again. “Probably somethin’ cheesy like rollerblading knowin’ that book.”

Falling on his ass repeatedly did not sound like fun, and Cas grimaced. “I don’t think I’d enjoy that very much. Why are you frowning at my face?”

“Because I can’t do it justice. It’s too beautiful.” He winked and went back to work with his tongue between his lips, as if that didn’t just destroy what little composure Cas still had. 

_ That can’t be a lie. He’s said it too often, he has to actually believe that… it can’t just be something he’s saying for the project.  _ “It’s the tie. It… makes my eyes bluer.”

“It does, but that isn’t it. You’re eyes are out of this world as-is, sweetheart. It’s like staring at an angel’s true form; too beautiful to be of earth. I gotta piss. Damn wine.” Dean got up and ran upstairs quickly, leaving Cas bewildered. 

He snuck a peek at the canvas, and found the outline of his features. It actually looked pretty good for someone who claimed they didn’t know what they were doing.

Dean came back a moment later with narrowed eyes. “You peeked, huh?”

“I couldn’t help it.” His face flushed and he smiled softly. “Are you mad?”

“Yup.” Dean sat down again and took another sip of wine. “My daddles aren’t listenin’ now that we’re half-rats onna Wednesday.” He brought back his accent and Cas couldn’t figure out how the hell he knew all this damn Victorian slang.

“Wait… does that mean you  _ are  _ mad, or you aren’t? I’m… lost.” Cas bit his lip, trying to look innocent. 

“I’m mad at you. So, so mad at you.” He was biting his lip and his face didn’t look angry at all as he continued painting, but that only promised good things for Cas. 

He squirmed, getting antsy in more ways than one. “Are you done yet?”

“Nope.” Dean grinned and drew one line and then sat up. “Okay, done. Tada.”

It was much better than the one he’d drawn of Dean, and the finish product made Cas’ breath catch in his throat. “It’s gorgeous, Dean. I should’ve known you’d be incredible at this, too.”

“I don’t think it’s as good as your actual face, but thanks. I’ll hang it up right there above your dick vase. And the one you made will go up, too.”

“First dick vases, and now this? Coupled with your sudden knowledge of nineteenth century slang, I’m beginning to think there’s quite a lot I don’t know about you, Dean.”  _ And I’m almost scared to find out what else I don’t know.  _

~~~~

“Yes, leave the bumpers up.” Cas blinked at the bowling alley attendant and sighed. “It’s a thing. Just… yes. Leave them up.”

The man nodded and gave them their shoes, then directed Cas, Dean, Jask, and Ares to their lane. Cas grumbled to himself as he plopped down to swap out his shoes and the others immediately began searching for balls.  _ Intentionally bad bowling. This should be… hilarious  _

Dean and Jask picked out bright pink balls and started moonwalking on the slick floor. 

Ares covered his eyes and pretended not to see. “If I don’t look, I can pretend I don’t know them.”

“I’m not sure it works like that.” Cas frowned at his own ridiculous shirt and shoes, then tried to come up with the nicknames the book said they were supposed to give each other. “I vote ‘Dumb’ and ‘Dumber’ for those two.”

Ares laughed and started typing it in. “Hurry before they notice. Which one is Dumber?” They glanced over and Dean was trying to spin the ball on his finger, nearly dropping it in the process. “I see...” he went back to typing, biting back a laugh. “What about us? Should we be something that makes us sound awesome?”

“Einstein and Tesla, maybe?” Cas watched Jask practicing his varied techniques and raised an eyebrow. “Is he always that ungraceful?”

“No, actually.” Ares stared longingly for a moment and then sat back up. “Well, mostly, but not in bed.” 

Dean walked back over with a grin. “I’m The Dude.” He glanced at what Ares was typing and frowned. “Hey, what the hell! J, they named us Dumb and Dumber.”

Jask roared with laughter and clapped Dean on his shoulder. “Alright,  _ Dumber, _ guess that means I’m up first.” 

“No, no... I’m dumb.” Dean frowned when he realized what he just said. “I mean you’re dumber.”

Ares made an  _ aww _ sound and clasped his shoulder. “Glad you understand now.” 

Dean shrugged his hand off with a scoff. “Whatever, fuck you guys, Ima win anyway.”

“Dean… the winner here is technically the person that does the worst.” Cas walked over to him and kissed him on the nose. “You’re too good to win, but… I think you really might be Dumber.”

He narrowed his eyes and wrapped an arm around Cas’ waist. “Yeah? Think so...  _ dear?” _

“If I take it back, will you kiss me?” Cas curled against Dean and tilted his head. 

Dean’s eyes dropped to his lips and he leaned in without hesitation. It went on much longer than Cas expected, but he absolutely was not going to complain with as good as Dean tasted. 

Trying to do badly actually turned out to be much more difficult than it sounded. The bumpers made it impossible to miss the pins on the first throw, and nearly impossible on the second. 

Dean was technically losing, because he seemed to not understand that a strike was bad. After his third one, he went to get them more beers with J, and Cas sat back down with Ares. 

“How’s the ‘fake’ dating going?” He leaned in to ask.

That was a complicated question, one that Cas wasn’t sure he knew how to answer anymore. “It’s going well, I think. Most of our dates have been successes. And… when I say ‘success’, I mean…  _ success.  _ I’m just starting to have a hard time remembering where the lines are, but I’m assuming that’s painfully obvious.”

“It is. You both have those lovestruck idiot eyes when you look at each other. It’s honestly adorable.” Ares smiled softly. “At least it’s both of you and not just one. Then things would get really messy. So...” he leaned in further, “sex?”

“I’m not convinced it  _ is  _ both of us, but Ares… the sex is…” Cas trailed off with a little noise and flicked his eyes to Dean across the bowling alley. “He’s ruined me. Forever.”

“Ugh... I know the feeling. You know I was mostly a top before J? Pfft.” He chuckled. “But why do you think it isn’t both? He acts like a devoted boyfriend whenever I see him. Is he different when you’re alone?”

Another complicated question. Cas screwed up his face as he tried to make sense of it. “Sometimes? There are days when it seems he feels the same way I do,”  _ Absolutely not stopping to point out I just admitted that,  _ “and other days he very clearly seems to understand that this is a project. I’m having a hard time keeping up. And my birthday? It wasn’t a date, and yet…”

Ares raised his eyebrows and leaned in. “What exactly did he do?” 

Lucky for Cas, he didn’t have to answer, because Dumb and Dumber made their way back and passed out beers. “Alright wack-a-doos, let’s do this.” Dean rubbed his hands together and picked up his ball.

After the longest, funniest, most embarrassing evening of Cas’ life… Ares ended up winning. Cas’ fingers were sore by the end and he was buzzed from the beer, but he was even more in love with Dean than he had been that morning. 

He caught him in the parking lot, his laughter trailing off as he turned to face Dean. “You are an absolutely adorable moron, did you know that?”

“Damn... Dumber Moron Winchester? How do you ever go in public with me?” He poked his stomach and then pulled him in by his shirt. “We’re technically still onna date.”

“Because, at least two to three days a week, you’re  _ my  _ Dumber Moron Winchester.” Cas bit his lip and then wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck, pulling him into a kiss. 

_ I just wish that were true for all seven.  _


	18. Game Night

**Dean**

“Alright, sunshine.” Dean walked over and slapped Cas’ ass playfully. “Let’s scratch off this date.”  _ Man, I love weekends. Especially now. I get to hang out with my best friend all day. _ He forced himself not to think about how it might be when it ended.

Cas gave him a teasing look, scratched off the date, then chuckled quietly. “You know Monopoly money? We have to create our own, but with favors. Then we play a game of our choosing to decide who gets what ‘currency’.”

“Ooo...” Dean already had about fifty sexual ones, but then realized he’d need to think of some normal ones, too. “Alright, I got a few ideas. Let’s rock, paper, scissors. Winner picks the game.” He held out his hands with a playful glint in his eyes.

Cas chose rock, which beat Dean’s scissors. He laughed and went to grab some paper and pens to make the currency. “One day you will learn not to pick scissors every time.” He opened their hall closet and studied the games, thinking out loud about which one would be easiest to add currency to. “How about Yahtzee? Each time one of us rolls five of a kind, we get one of the bills?”

“Sounds fair enough. For the record, one day you won’t pick rock though, and I’ll win.” Dean clicked his tongue as if that made any sense and walked back to raid their cupboards. “What should we do for dinner? If you pick pizza, we’re callin’ a different place. Last one took over an hour.”

“Something easy? Could make some burgers or some hot dogs real quick while we fill out the currency.” Cas came over to help but ended up sliding his hands down Dean’s body and kissing the back of his shoulder. “Do you have a preference?”

_ Yeah, rather eat you... and pie. _ “Burgers sound good, I’ll get on it.”  _ Why do his hands feel so damn good? _ Dean laid his head back, enjoying the soft touches.

“Mm.” Cas kept going, sliding up under Dean’s shirt and ghosting his lips over the side of Dean’s neck. “Sorry, am I stopping you?”

_ Yes. _ “Uh-uh.”  _ Don’t stop. Wanna feel your fingers on me for the rest of my life. _ Dean realized what he’d nearly said and cleared his throat, stepping out of Cas’ arms. “Uh, we’ll never eat if I don’t start now. Save all that for when I beat you tonight and cash in my money.”

Cas stepped back almost instantly and cleared his throat, hastily grabbing the plates and hamburger buns. “We’ll make it a short game, then.”

“Sounds good.” Dean went out to start the grill and then went back in for the patties. “You know Ares brought home a dog?”

A slow smile spread across his face. “Good, I know he wanted to. How did Jask take it?”

Dean chuckled. “Not great. Guess he brought home a little fat bulldog. J’s convinced it’s from another planet. They want us to come meet her this week, but Ares said she needs time to get aquatinted before she meets  _ me _ specifically, whatever that means.”

“I plead the fifth.” Cas got everything ready and started writing out his currency with his tongue between his teeth. “Should we keep some of these PG so we can use them between dates?”

“Aw man,” Dean joked with a grin, “yeah, some PG for sure. I need another one of those massages.” He flipped the patty and walked over to fill some out.

Twenty minutes later, they were fed and had their stacks ready to go. Cas took Dean’s and turned them all upside down, shuffled them, then set them on the center of the table and pulled out the dice. “Let’s make this simple. Screw the original scorecards. We each get three chances to roll per turn, and the goal is five of a kind. If we get it, we pick one off the pile and keep it. When they’re all gone, the person with the most…” he paused. “Should they get something extra?”

“Abso-friggin-lutely.” Dean instantly pictured what he wanted and had to clench his knees.  _ Goddammit, I better win. _ “Roll ‘em, hot stuff. You can go first.”

Cas obliged, but failed. Dean took his turn and didn’t fare much better, and it took another three turns for Cas to finally roll a Yahtzee. He plucked the top slip and didn’t read it, then passed the dice to Dean. 

It went on like that for what felt like hours, until finally, Dean  _ whooped  _ and snatched the last of them. “Hell yeah!”

“Okay, okay. You win. Let’s look over what we’ve won first, and then you can tell me what your prize is for having the most.” He sorted through his own and grinned. “I’m the proud new owner of one middle-of-the-night sexual encounter in one of the buildings you’re doing construction on, sex in the Impala, a blowjob with your hands tied behind your back, and… a slow dance in the kitchen. What’d you get?”

“Breakfast in bed, cockwarming, I get to facefuck you in a public restroom, a massage, hah! And… you get to wash Baby for me wearing nothing but a Speedo.” Dean bit his lip and smirked, drumming on the table. “And as for what I get as my big prize…” 

Cas was flushed, but looked excited. “Spit it out, Dean. We both know you know what you want.”

“You. Riding me. In a maid outfit.”

All the color drained from Cas’ face and his hand immediately shot to his crotch. “Fuck. Um… yes. Yes, okay. Shit.”

_ Fuck yeah, he’s on board. _ “I’ll order that shit right now, baby. Don’t play.” He grabbed his phone and looked up to meet Cas’ eyes, practically bouncing with excitement.

“Dean, all of the blood in my body is between my legs right now, please don’t make me think.” Cas nodded like a bobble head and then closed his eyes, palming himself and groaning.

_ I can shop later, he needs me. _ Dean tossed his phone aside and pulled Cas’ chair towards him, fumbling with his jeans. “This one’s free.”

Cas lifted his hips and helped Dean push his pants down, then gripped his own length and stroked slowly. “Fuck. Dean… why was that so hot?” 

Dean licked his lips and decided not to answer.  _ I know what my boyf— no... not boyfriend, asshat. Shut up. I know what  _ **_you_ ** _ need, Cas.  _ He quickly sucked him down, sliding him into his throat without any teasing.

“Shit! Ahh, th—thank you.” Cas rocked eagerly into his mouth, grunting and tugging at Dean’s hair until he was coming with a growl and going boneless against the chair as Dean swallowed him down. 

Dean glanced up, still lapping along his sensitive length slowly. “So... can I cash in somethin’?”  _ Cause I’m about to fuckin’ explode. _

Cas twitched and nodded quickly. “Don’t waste one. That was free, so this will be, too. Just tell me what you want, Dean. Anything.”

Dean thought about that a moment before he stood. “Will you suck me and let me come all over your face?”

A low moan escaped Cas a moment before he dropped to his knees, tugging on Dean’s pants and greedily sucking him in. 

Dean gripped his hair with a growl, thrusting in further. Cas sucked him like a pro and when Dean could feel he was close, he tugged him off and started feverishly stroking himself. The second Cas made eye contact, Dean lost it, painting Cas’ face white with streaks of hot come. He groaned and shivered in pleasure, still rutting against Cas’ plump lips.

Cas’ tongue darted out to clean him up and he stayed on his knees, looking up at Dean and swallowing thickly. “Take a picture.”

“Fuck.” Dean gripped the base and reached over to grab his phone. “You’re fucking amazing, Cas.” He took the picture happily, knowing damn well he’d jack off to that until he died.

“Send it to me?” Cas stood, then disappeared into the bathroom off the dining room to clean himself up, and came back a few moments later. “I’m curious, which one were you going to cash in?”

“Nah... guess you’ll find out tomorrow. Wait, did you say these are just for date night?”  _ Shit, of course he did. _

He hesitated, then tilted his head. “Technically, they’re an extension of  _ this  _ date night… which means they can be used whenever. It’s probably best to use them on non-date nights, to be honest… just so we’re not altering the actual course of the dates?”

“That sounds good with me.” Dean glanced at the time and started cleaning up. “Nightcap?” He asked nervously, not quite ready to say goodnight.

Cas agreed and poured them each a drink. “We have another date tomorrow, right? Sunday? So… we could… stay with each other tonight. Make it one long date?”

“Yeah?” Dean grinned and walked to stand behind Cas, kissing up the back of his neck. “It can just be a date weekend. All bets off.” He ran his hands up his body softly. “I always want to be onna date with you, anyway.”  _ Shit, did I say that out loud? _

He turned slowly, kissing Dean properly. “I think that sounds like an excellent idea.”

“Awesome.” Dean deepened the kiss, gripping Cas’ ass and thinking of how damn perfect their bodies fit together. He would never get enough... and he never wanted to.

They kissed like that all the way to Dean’s bedroom, and barely separated long enough to strip down to boxers and collapse on the bed. Cas rolled to hover over Dean, kissing his lips, cheek, jaw, and finally his neck.

And Dean bared his neck as his hands roamed to Cas’ hips. “Damn, Cas. You’re so addictive,” he whispered.

Chuckling softly, Cas settled beside him and threw an arm over his chest. “Good, I’m glad I’m having the same effect on you that you’re having on me. I told Ares at the bowling alley last night that sex with you has effectively ruined me for anyone else.”

“Good.” Dean brought a hand up to place on Cas’, a huge grin across his face.  _ Stay here and you’ll never have to have sex with anyone else.... ever again. _

**Castiel**

Sunday’s date involved a record store, finding interesting-looking vinyl covers, and a cozy coffee shop date where they shared a pair of headphones and streamed the albums they’d picked out. Dean had gone with  _ Nine Lives  _ by Aerosmith, while Cas had chosen  _ Captain Fantastic and the Brown Dirt Cowboy  _ by Elton John. 

Being that close to Dean in a public space was always hard, but even more so now that he knew they shared a public sex kink. 

Focusing on the two hours’ worth of songs and not the way Dean smelled or how their bodies were rubbing together was a job all on its own, and knowing that come Monday he’d have to go back to treating Dean like a friend wasn’t helping.  _ It’s just a couple of days. We’ll have another date soon, and this one isn’t quite over yet… I’ll have him to myself once we get back home.  _

But, as all things generally happen, he didn’t get Dean to himself at all. They’d walked into a small flood in the dining room thanks to a busted pipe, and since their landlord was all but useless, they’d spent the rest of the day fixing the pipe and cleaning up the considerable mess. By the time they were done, neither one of them was in the mood to do anything but shower and sleep… which, while utterly disappointing, was probably for the best. 

Cas was falling way too hard, way too fast, and he wasn’t going to complain about an excuse to prolong the inevitable splatter when he finally hit rock bottom.  _ As if I’m not there already… If it’s possible to love him any more than I do right now, I’m not sure I want to know.  _

~~~~

“Who here thinks they’re in a passionate relationship? Anyone?” Ketch looked around as several students raised their hands, Castiel not among them. “Interesting. Can any of you give me an example of passion?” 

A girl Cas never paid much attention to raised her hand and cleared her throat. “When the sex — I’m sorry, intercourse — gets extremely… heated?” 

_ I highly doubt any of these people even know the meaning of the word ‘heated’. I sure didn’t until Dean.  _

“You’re not wrong. Passion often can and does manifest itself in the bedroom, but it is not limited to sexual activity. Does anyone have an example of passion  _ not  _ strictly related to sex?” Ketch waited several moments, and when no one answered, he kept going. “Intrusive thoughts are also considered a form of passion. Meaning… when you’re in love, you’ll find yourself nearly constantly thinking about the object of that love, sometimes even at inappropriate moments. The old ‘can’t get you out of my head’ adage is, in reality, quite accurate.”

Cas shifted in his seat, pointedly trying  _ not  _ to think of Dean — and yet, that’s exactly what happened.  _ He’s on my mind constantly. He’s the first and last thing I think of each day, and I can’t remember the last time I went a full hour without thinking about him.  _

“To add to that,” Ketch continued, “an intense desire to know and be known. Simply put, you want to know everything there is to know about your partner, and want them to know an equal amount about yourself. As if no amount of small details in the world would ever be enough to quench your thirst.” Cas grunted quietly, not attempting to convince himself he didn’t know what that felt like. Everything about Dean was interesting and he was past the point of trying to deny it. “Furthermore, and sort of in relation to that… are the strong emotional extremes one feels when in love. When things are good, you feel great… when they’re bad…” Ketch grimaced. “I think we’ve all been there, hm?” 

_ It’s a constant rollercoaster. Tell me something I don’t know.  _

“And finally, a need to maintain physical closeness. Sitting next to each other, sharing a bed. Making excuses for even the most innocent of touches. With passion comes a great need for physical contact, in or out of the bedroom.” 

His mind wandered to all of the times he couldn’t seem to resist running his hands over Dean’s body, or how desperately he’d wanted to sleep next to Dean nearly every night for the last month. Even before their dates, they always sat a little too close to each other, touched a little too often.  _ But was it always just me? Was I always the one initiating that?  _

“It’s important to note that passionate love comes in two different types. Requited, and unrequited. Requited love is the kind we all aspire to have — mutual attraction and feelings between two individuals. Unrequited is the opposite, where one person feels intensely toward another but the feelings are not reciprocated. It is, in all seriousness, extremely important that you know  _ and  _ recognize the difference.” 

As Ketch wrapped up his lecture and provided their newest assignments, Cas was lost in his own mind.  _ Fine, so I’d been wrong originally, Dean and I do have passion…Or, at least one of us does. But the question is… do both of us? Or, in the most likely scenario, am I in love alone and Dean is simply going along for the ride because he feels the project calls for it?  _ Every part of him wanted to believe he was wrong, and yet… he couldn’t shake the fear that he was right. 

After all, he wasn’t wrong very often. 

~~~~

The following night had them standing in the middle of a bookstore asking random strangers if they’d pick out a recipe for them from a cookbook. It took several attempts before someone finally agreed, and after snapping a quick photo of the recipe, they got what they needed from the store and tried their hand at it. 

It wasn’t as horrible as Cas expected it to be, but it still left a weird taste in his mouth that he all too eagerly washed down with whiskey. “That was… interesting. When do you want to do the next date?” 

“Why don’t we do one we gotta plan? It’s been a while. We could scratch it off now and do it Friday or Saturday?” 

Cas nodded, then scratched off their next date. “It says we need to talk to a happy couple, pick their brain about their first date, and then do our best to recreate it exactly.” He glanced up at Dean. “Jask and Ares?” 

“Yeah, they’re annoyingly happy. Let’s go bug ‘em and meet that doggy.” Dean lit up at the mention of the puppy and Cas‘ chest constricted at the sight. 

_ Why do I get the feeling I’m going to end up a dog mom?  _ He stood, thankful they were still at the end of a date and pulled Dean close, lightly kissing each corner of his mouth. “You should call first, just in case they’re busy.”

“K.” Dean pulled out his phone and asked if they were home. He could tell Jask wanted to know why he was asking, but Dean gave no clues and hung up the phone. “They’re home, let’s go.” He hastily walked towards the front door and threw on some slippers, Cas following. 

They knocked, and Ares opened the door. “Hey, guys. Come on in… just mind the… damnit, Chaos!” The little pup was jumping all over his legs and nearly tripped Ares which made Cas chuckle.  _ I’m absolutely not going to be a dog mom.  _

Dean practically shoved his way inside the house and dropped to his knees. “You are so fat. Hi, I’m Dean.” Chaos began jumping all over him and kissing his face.

“Don’t insult my daughter like that, Dean. She’s not fat, she’s... cuddly.” Jask snatched Chaos up and held her close. “Get your own, she has a brother.” He started baby-talking the dog and Cas shared an eye roll with Ares.

“Hey, you get ‘er every day. Gimme.” Dean reached for the pup to snatch her back, but J moved so he couldn’t. “C’mon!”

Ares chuckled and shook his head. “And this was why we made Dean wait to meet her.”

It was adorable, and Cas had a hard time even remembering why they were there. “Um… we were wondering if you’d tell us about your first date? It’s for the project. We’re supposed to reenact the date of a happy couple. You were the first two we thought about.”

Ares smiled and tilted his head slightly. “Well, if it’s supposed to be romantic, we should tell you about our fifth date. That was the first time we were able to actually go to dinner and keep our hands off each other.”

Dean somehow managed to get Chaos and walked closer to them again. “Nah, we wanna hear the very first one. Don’t leave out any details.”

_ Of course he doesn’t want the romantic one.  _

“That would be the night we met. I walked in, took one look at him, and knew there was zero chance I was going home with anyone else. I  _ relentlessly  _ hit on him. I was kinda obnoxious about it.” Jask laughed, smiling with fondness at Ares. “Eventually he couldn’t resist me anymore… and I ended up fucking him behind the bar. We couldn’t even make it back to the car. Do you want  _ those  _ details?”

Dean looked as though he was going to say yes but one look at Cas and Ares had him changing his mind. “No, we can improvise that part. Huh, sweetheart?”

“Yes, Dean. I think we do just fine in that department.” Cas smiled, almost embarrassed, and dropped his eyes. “That seems simple enough… is there anything else we should know?”

Ares chuckled and whispered into Cas’ ear, “I played hard to get, but it was over the minute I saw him. But... make him work for it.”

Dean walked closer. “Wanna share with the class, Ares?”

“We both know who’s who in this situation. I’m simply telling Cas if he wants to make it realistic, he can’t let you have it right away. You prepared to put some leg work in, Dean?” Ares grinned, standing a little taller. “Or are you going to get bored when your first Neanderthal attempt doesn’t pan?” 

“Nean— what? First of all, I’d jump through fire if Cas asked me to. Don’t ever doubt my devotion here.” Dean handed Jask the puppy and reached for Cas’ hand. “Think we got all we needed here.”

Ares chuckled. “Oh, and Dean? I topped.”

_ I already knew that part, but… what? Fire?  _ Cas took Dean’s hand and nodded. “Yes, we did. Should we go finish the date we were already on?”

“Yeah, I think we should,” Dean said, then led the way back home. 


	19. Somewhere Between Heaven and Hell

**Dean**

“Gotta go, Sammy. It’s date night.” Dean finished picking up his tools and looked up at his beanpole of a brother. “What’s that face?”

“I’m just worried about you, Dean.” Sam turned to face him, not dropping that expression. “I honestly figured you guys would’ve either called this off by now or made it official.”

“Why are those the only two options? We’re having fun.”  _ And so much more. _ “Cas needs this for school, Sam. I won’t quit on him.”

He sighed. “That’s exactly the problem, you’re willing to break your own damn heart trying to help him. And I’m sorry, but your happiness is more important to me than some project, and both you and Cas should feel that way, too.”

“I’m fine, Sam. Everything is fine.”  _ If I keep saying it, it’ll be true. _ “This project has brought us closer together, and I didn’t know that was even possible. We might get a dog.”  _ I want that fat pup’s brother... just gotta convince Cas. _

None of that looked like it was convincing Sam, but he nodded anyway. “Okay, Dean. I just want you to be happy.” He clasped Dean on the shoulder and then turned. “I’m gonna head home… see you Monday.”

Dean made his way home, forcing himself not to think about... whatever the hell Sam was implying. He considered cashing in one of those Cas bills. One said ‘dirty, afterwork sex’ and he wasn't sure which of them would enjoy it more, but he'd be lying if he said he didn't want it. It was date night... but then he remembered what the date was, and that he'd be getting fucked in an alleyway later regardless.  _ I'll save that money and use that time to prep for Cas.  _ He walked inside and didn't see Cas so he assumed he was upstairs getting dressed. "Hey, Cas, Ima shower real fast and meet you downstairs. Do we have food plans or should we do bar food?"

“Bar food! Definitely bar food,” Cas yelled. 

"You got it." Dean took his shower and prepped inside. He had a plug he'd never actually used, so he figured this was as good a time as any. Walking around while getting dressed was uncomfortable, but by the time he was going downstairs he was getting used to the intrusion. He even texted Jask yesterday so he could dress the part. He had on a white t-shirt, but he borrowed J's black leather jacket and even threw on some damn skinny black jeans.  _ Hopefully Cas has a little thing for douchebags, cause J was a fucking tool five years ago. _ "Cas?"

He got no answer whatsoever, but when he picked up his phone, Cas texted him and told him he took an Uber to the bar, and that it was more realistic if they didn’t go together. 

_ Aw, man... makes sense though... whatever. _ Dean got in Baby and drove to the bar. 

He weirdly had butterflies as he walked in, and it felt kinda nice. Like maybe this should have been how they started, too. He walked around, even grabbed a drink before he finally spotted Cas.  _ Fuck, he’s gorgeous.  _ He was wearing a tight, fitted dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. The skinny tie and glasses had him looking like a hot nerd… the kind you’d love to corrupt. 

Dean had to remember to stay in character and cleared his throat. “Alright... now I gotta be douchey.” 

A girl heard him and asked him what he said, her eyes raking his body. Dean huffed a laugh and leaned in. “See that hot nerd over there?” He pointed at Cas and clicked his tongue. “Ima marry him one day.”  _ Douchey enough, right? _

“Him? Yeah, right. You may be hotter than he is, but he looks smart enough not to give a guy like you the time of day.” She grinned, showing she was mostly kidding. “Good luck, though.”

“Uh, half thanks?” Dean shrugged and walked towards Cas. “Hey there, handsome. Can I get you a drink?”

Cas paused, sipping the one he already had and barely sparing a glance toward Dean. “You  _ can,  _ but I’m not sure whether or not it’s advisable.”

“Why wouldn’t it be advisable?” Dean leaned against the bar and eyed him.  _ He’s actually good at this cold shoulder shit. _

Blue eyes met his, and almost exactly like Ares said… Dean could see the moment Cas’ resolve left and the guy nearly melted. Cas cleared his throat and tried to regain his composure. “There are far easier targets in this bar. I was simply saying you’d have... better luck... elsewhere.” 

“I don’t wanna easy target. I like what I see right here. So... what’s your name?”

Cas licked his lip slowly and took another drink before answering. "Castiel. Who are you?"

_ Oh, our real names. _ “Dean. The one you’ve been waiting for. Your future husband. I dunno, take your pick. Let me buy you a greasy bar burger.”

"Future husband, hm? That's a pretty big promise to make, Dean." He set his glass down and flicked his eyes to the seat next to him. "Sit."

“Yes, sir.” Dean plopped down too hard and flinched, biting his lip to keep from groaning out.  _ Ah fuck... goddamn plug. _ He waved down the barkeep and ordered them burgers and another whiskey, then turned back toward Cas. “You single?”

He nodded, leaning a little closer. “I am, but for good reason. Do you think you’ll be able to convince me to change my mind?” 

“Yeah, I do.” Dean leaned in, wanting to kiss him again. “How about you tell me a secret, and I’ll tell you one, too.”

Cas looked at him with genuine curiosity. “Fine, but you first.” He spun in his chair to face Dean fully, both of their knees touching. “I have issues trusting strangers to follow through with their end of things.”

“Do you? Well I’m not a stranger, babe. I’m your future husband, remember? But fine. C’mere and I’ll tell you my secret. You gotta promise to stay focused and tell me yours too, though. Deal?” Dean held out his pinky, and Cas took it, hooking them together. 

“I’ll do my very best. What’s your secret?”

Dean leaned in to whisper in his ear. “M’wearin’ a plug right now.” He sat back again and thanked the bartender for their food, then met Cas’ eyes.

His gaze immediately dropped to Dean’s waist and his pupils blew. “You’re... oh.” Cas’ fingers curled against the bar and he stood up, leaning in and kissing Dean slowly. “My secret? Are you ready?”

“Yeah... what is it?” Dean kissed him again and then ate a fry.

Cas rolled his eyes, like Dean stopping to eat killed a moment or something. “I’m wearing panties. That was supposed to be hotter… Whatever.” He laughed, stealing one of Dean’s fries and sitting back down. 

“Fuck...” Dean didn’t even want the food anymore, but he forced it down and tossed back his drink. “How about you meet me out back and we show each other our... secrets.”

Without a word, Cas slid off the barstool and headed for the bar’s back door, stopping right in front of it. He was mostly in shadow, so it was doubtful anyone could see him that wasn’t actively looking. Cas toyed with his tight jeans and pushed them down far enough to give Dean a peek, then disappeared outside. 

_ Fuck, I wish I was topping, too. _ He followed him and the second they were far enough from the back light, Dean pushed Cas against the wall and kissed him.

Cas opened for him instantly, all coldness and hesitancy gone. He moaned into Dean’s mouth and unbuckled Dean’s jeans, pushing them down quickly and flipping them; pressing him against the bricks and biting his neck. 

“Ah, fuck... You’re so fucking hot, Cas. Gonna fuck me against this alley wall, sweetheart?” Dean rutted their crotches together and pulled Cas’ up by his hair to nip his lip.

“You prepped for me, didn’t you?” Cas reached down to palm Dean, kissing over his jaw. “Stretched yourself open for me… Fuck. Yes, turn around. I can’t wait.”

One look at Dean’s exposed ass must’ve done something for Cas, because the plug was quickly being worked out of his ass. “So damn beautiful, Dean. Fuck, I…” He grunted, and after a snap of a lube cap, Cas was audibly jacking himself off behind him. “Your ass is so fucking perfect and I’m not even inside it yet.”

“You should change that, big boy.” Cas nudged at Dean’s hole and slid inside, making Dean nearly cry out in pleasure. “S’all yours, Cas. All yours.”  _ Fuck, I can’t wait to come all over this dirty wall. _

One of Cas’ hands clamped over Dean’s mouth, but not hard enough to stop him from talking, and the other wrapped around Dean’s cock. He groaned, thrusting in and slowly stroking him. “Think we’ll get caught if I take my time with you?”

”Everyone can fuck off. Take what you want from me, baby.” Dean pushed back and reached down to grip the base of his cock.

Cas’ fingers found his and he folded his hand over Dean’s, guiding his instead as he sucked on the back of Dean’s neck and rocked deeper into him. “You’re so tight… how long did you have that plug in? How long were you waiting for me?”

Dean grunted out, “Since I got home. I wanted you to fuck me right then.”

“I would’ve.” Cas buried himself deep and stopped moving, breathing heavily. “Do you have any idea how unbelievably, stupidly hot you are when you’re dirty? Fuck, I can’t think straight.” He bit Dean’s shoulder and snapped his hips, sliding a finger into Dean’s mouth.

Groaning, Dean sucked his finger, pushing back into every thrust Cas would give him. His cock was leaking into their hands, he didn’t know how much longer he could hang on.

Cas gasped loudly, grinding into him and pulling his hands back to dig his fingers into Dean’s waist, slamming into him hard enough it echoed through the alley and made Dean’s asscheeks bounce between thrusts. Cas came, his hips erratic and desperate as he kept fucking into Dean as he emptied. 

“Fuck yeah, fill me up, Cas.” Dean stroked three more times before he started coming all over the grungy alley wall, and Cas feverishly kissed all over Dean’s neck before pulling out with a whimper. 

_ Fuck, that was amazing. _ “Put that plug back in, sweetheart.” Dean shook his ass for Cas.

“Absolutely incredible, Dean,” Cas exhaled, nudging and working the plug back inside of Dean. 

As they fixed their clothes, Dean watched Cas with a grin. “We should do that occasionally, that was fun. Next time, you get to pick me up.” He winked and pulled Cas back inside by his hand. Their date was far from over.

**Castiel**

Saturday morning, Cas stayed in bed with his face buried under the pillow.  _ Every time I think I can’t dig myself any deeper, I do. How? How is it even possible? How am I ever going to get over this?  _ He groaned, knowing he had to go on another date with Dean in just a few hours.  _ Another date, another chance to fall even more in love. Just kill me. I nearly told him last night… I don’t know how much longer I can keep it from him.  _

To his surprise, his door squeaked open and the devil himself peeked his head in. He walked over and crawled into bed, spooning Cas. “This okay? It’s still date weekend.” Dean kissed the back of his neck and sighed contentedly.

_ No. Yes. Fuck. I love you? I love you.  _ Cas nodded, leaning back against Dean and reaching behind him. “Of course it’s okay. Like I could ever tell you no about anything at all.”

“I’m not... takin’ advantage of you, right?” He whispered so low Cas almost missed it. “I can’t help it, I always wanna touch you now.”

Cas couldn’t handle Dean thinking such a stupid, misguided thing and rolled over to face him, kissing him a lot more intensely than normal. “No, Dean. You’re not. I promise you.” He slid his hand down Dean’s side and cuddled closer, not wanting him to get scared and run away. “Don't go.”  _ I don’t get many of these moments.  _

“I don’t wanna go.” He held him tightly and closed his eyes, both of them living in the moment together. 

They laid like that until Cas was nearly asleep again, but the growling of Dean’s stomach had him forcing his eyes open again. “We should go eat and scratch off today’s date, or else I’ll never leave this bed.”  _ I still don’t want to leave this bed. Stay. Let’s see if we can DoorDash food to the bed.  _

“Okay.” Dean rolled on his back, half asleep himself, but he put a hand on his belly. “Can we just sleep together tonight, too?”

“Yes, absolutely.” Relieved, Cas nodded and kissed him before rolling out of bed and heading for the door. “I’ll start the coffee.” 

“Okay, I’ll be right there.” He turned into Cas’ pillow and nuzzled it as close as possible with a hum, making Cas smile softly before heading downstairs.

He got the coffee maker going quickly, rubbing the sleep from his eyes and trying unsuccessfully to fix his hair before Dean came down. 

Breakfast was a lazy, touchy affair. Cas couldn’t seem to keep his hands to himself, and they sat so close together they might as well have been using the same seat. Cas groaned when they finished, dropping his forehead to Dean’s shoulder and yawning. “Why am I so tired today? Did we get drugged last night?”

“We must be gettin’ old already. We had too many drinks.” Dean kissed his head and started scratching off a date. “Looks like we gotta go outside.”

“It’s bright out there.” Cas leaned over to look at the page and laughed quietly. “Marco Polo with blindfolds and water balloons? I’ll bet you ten dollars one of us accidentally hits a child or an old woman.”

“Fuck, probably!” Dean laughed. “Shit, it’s gonna be me. I hope it’s a kid. Old ladies scare me. They get all grabby on me nethers.” He grinned. “I dunno why I went pirate, don’t ask.”

_ As if you needed to be any more adorable.  _

~~~~

The park wasn’t as crowded as Cas thought it would be, so they were able to find a mostly empty patch of grass to set up in. Cas sighed and looked over at Dean as he fidgeted with the blindfold in his hand. “So, whoever lands the most wins. But what do we win?”

“What do you want?” Dean walked closer and stood inches from his face. “Clean or dirty?”

“Dirty. Definitely, decidedly dirty.”

“Hmm...” He leaned in and kissed Cas slowly, acting as if they weren’t in a public setting. “Was gonna make you slow dance with me right here in the park all wet, but since you want dirty... Want you to straddle me in Baby and rub our dicks together. How’s that sound?” He started kissing down Cas’ neck.

Cas grasped onto Dean’s shoulder and hair and rocked up on his toes, gasping quietly. “Can we skip the game?”

“Nuh uh... m’committed, baby.” Dean nipped his throat and pulled away, grabbing the blindfold. “Turn around.”

With a great deal of effort, Cas spun around and let Dean tie the blindfold. “So, does this mean I’m ‘it’ first? How many shots do I get?”

“Uhh... ten? Think you can get me in ten?” He tied it off, kissed the back of his neck, and whispered into his ear, “Marco.” But Cas heard the grass under his feet and knew he’d moved.

“Dean, it’s — it’s  _ Polo.  _ I’m supposed to say Ma— Nevermind.” Cas turned in a slow circle and held the balloon steady as he listened closely for Dean. “Marco?”

“Polo.” Dean sounded much too far to be playing fair, but Cas tried anyway, lobbing the water balloon up and waiting for the burst. 

“Did I hit you?”

He could hear a lot of movement but couldn’t pinpoint where it was. “No.” Dean said in his ear and then was gone again.

“Damnit!” Over and over Cas tried, but supposedly, he didn’t hit Dean once.  _ Come on. I just want to see him wet... is that too much to ask? Wait a minute... no one said I had to play fair. _ He moved suddenly, then willingly fell to the ground, holding tight to his last two water bombs. “Ouch!”

“Shit! Cas.” Dean jogged up and helped him up. “You okay, klutz?”

Cas barked a triumphant laugh as he smashed both of the balloons on Dean’s head, grinning in satisfaction at the groan he received.

Dean started untying Cas’ blindfold and shook the water off his head like a dog, spraying Cas. “Cheater. Also, we have an audience.” He nodded to the people who had stopped to watch them and handed him the blindfold. “Guess they wanted to see us get wet.”

“You, Dean. My guess is they’re here to see  _ you _ get wet.” He secured the blindfold around Dean’s eyes and then kissed him, just so every single one of those onlookers knew he was taken. “Ready?”

“Mmhmm.” He grabbed some balloons and did an adorable competitive stance. “Marco.”

Cass took off running, yelling, “Polo!” over his shoulder. Two seconds later, he was smacked between the shoulders with a water balloon.  _ Damnit. _

Dean didn’t even ask if he’d hit him, just kept going. “Marco.”  _ Smack. _ “Marco.”  _ Miss. _ “Marco.”  _ Smack. _

By the end, Cas was soaked and exhausted from trying to change direction every twelve seconds. “Uncle! Uncle, Damnit.” He huffed, laying down in the grass and closing his eyes. “You win. Thoroughly.”

Dean pulled off the blindfold and walked over, still holding balloons. “Hi. Wanna get me wetter and make out?”

“Fuck. Yes, absolutely.” Cas scrambled to his feet and took the balloons, breaking them over Dean’s head and drinking in the sight of him. He launched himself at Dean, kissing him silly and wrapping his arms around his neck. 

Dean opened willingly, his arms snaking around his back as he slid his tongue in Cas’ mouth. Cas didn’t think twice, he hopped up and wrapped his legs around Dean’s waist, deepening the kiss as the crowd actually started cheering and catcalling. He couldn’t bring himself to care… The only thing that existed… was Dean. 

Dean pulled back first, setting Cas down and slightly blushing at the attention. “Fuck, I l—” he paused and cleared his throat. “I won.”

_ And I pushed too far again.  _ Cas took a step back and was careful not to let anything show on his face. “You did. I think that means we have a date with your backseat.”

“Yup. Think all these people will move on soon if we keep makin’ out, or should we just disappear into the car now?” He pulled Cas in for another quick kiss.

“Let’s go now.” He wasn’t sure he could wait longer anyway, not when Dean looked  _ that _ good wet. He took Dean’s hand and led him to the Impala, grateful they parked away from most other cars. “Sit, I’m impatient.”

“Yes, sir.” Dean climbed in and shimmied down his basketball shorts but kept on his wet white shirt. It clung to him in all the right places and Cas quickly shucked off his own and climbed onto Dean’s lap. 

His skin heated up knowing he was exposed in broad daylight, but it only made him harder. Cas kissed Dean messily, bringing their cocks together and stroking slowly as the precome pooled at his tip.

Dean groaned into Cas’ mouth, sliding his hands to grip his ass and rut into his hand. “Cas...” he whispered as he bit down his jaw to suck on his neck. 

“Shit.” Cas was pulsing and leaking, using the slick moisture to ease the slide of his hand as he jacked them off together, rolling his hips and baring his neck to Dean. 

It felt too good to care about much of anything, so by the time Cas opened his eyes and saw a group of people walking toward the car, it was too late to change course. He tried to keep his upper body still, gripping Dean’s hair and burying his own head against the side of Dean’s face as he jerked his hips, muttering over and over again, “Don’t stop, fuck, don't stop.”

“Not gonn— ah, fuck!” Dean practically came unglued at the command and emptied all over their torsos. He kept moving — just like Cas asked — and Cas followed a moment later, biting his tongue so damn hard it hurt. 

He pushed his palm flat against the roof to steady himself and thrusted weakly, rubbing the tip of his softening, wet cock all over Dean’s shirt.  _ Gods, he looks so good I can’t take it. _

The ride home was… wet, and they probably cuddled a little too long once they got back home before taking showers. But that night, as he was falling asleep in Dean’s arms, Cas couldn’t bring himself to give a shit about getting wet, or being wet, or anything else. 

That… had been a pretty perfect day. 


	20. There’s No Place Like Home

**Dean**

Dean woke up first and stayed where he was. Cas looked so fucking peaceful he didn’t ever want to move. He wondered what he was dreaming about, and if he was ever in them.  _ Probably. He is stuck with your face all day every day.  _ But he couldn’t help but hope it was more. He grabbed his phone and ordered some DoorDash breakfast for them so they could stay lazy all day.

Dean loved all these dates with Cas, but he’d be lying if he didn’t admit to missing their lazy Sundays.  _ Maybe I can talk Cas into one day off, and we could do an extra date during the week.  _

When Cas started stirring, the food was set to be delivered in ten minutes. “Morning, angel.” He leaned over to kiss his cheek. “Breakfast will be here soon.”

“You ordered in?” Cas rolled toward Dean and buried his face in Dean’s chest with his eyes closed, sounding like he was still half asleep. “Gods, I love you.”

_ I love you too, Cas. But not how you mean right now.  _ “Yeah, I’m amazing.” Dean kissed Cas’ head and closed his eyes again, thinking of how good those words felt even if Cas just meant as friends.

“Does this mean we can be lazy today? Please say yes. Did I say that out loud? Whatever… Please say yes.” Cas held Dean tighter, rubbing his nose against his neck. 

“Yes. Lazy Sunday? We can order in for lunch and dinner too, and have a movie marathon.” He brought his hand up to play with Cas’ hair.

Cas hummed, relaxing. “Absolutely yes.”

“Awesome.” Dean sighed happily, wishing he could do this every single day with Cas. 

When breakfast arrived, they sleepily made their way downstairs to eat. Dean got them both their favorite dishes, because that’s the perk of dating your best friend. You know everything they like.

As soon as Cas set down his fork, Dean slid over a fake dollar bill with a grin. “Cashin’ in a massage, handsome.”

“Fine, but we’re doing it in a bed this time, because the second I’m done, I’m taking a nap.” He stood, throwing away the containers and wiping down the table. “Do you have an issue with that?”

“None at all.” Dean got up and followed him upstairs, watching his ass the entire time.

Cas took his time, rubbing down every inch of Dean’s body and kissing over his skin. “You know… you don’t need fake money for this. I’ll do it whenever.”

Dean grunted a response, feeling too damn good to use words. The last massage was amazing, but it lacked all the kisses that this one had. He was happy his rock hard erection was pressed into a mattress and not the hard floor, but he also had a feeling Cas was hard, too. Every so often, he would move in a way that had Dean swearing he could feel it. It made him want to ask if Cas was just as turned on as he was, but he didn’t want to ruin their moment.

He scooted back, rubbing Dean’s ass and upper thighs. “Are you feeling any better?”

_ Ah, fuck... those giant hands on my ass… _ “Mhmm, thank you. You want one, too?”

“That wouldn’t make this much of a prize, would it.” Cas leaned down and bit Dean’s ass gently, then moved further down his legs until he was at his feet. “Roll over, I’ll massage the rest of you.”

_ Shit... _ “Uh, okay, but blame your hands for this.” Dean rolled over, revealing his fully hard boner tenting his shorts. “Oops,” he shrugged. But sure enough, he could see Cas’ now, too. 

“Then I’ll deal with that in a minute.” Cas smirked, straddling his waist and rubbing his chest and shoulders, looking completely unapologetic. “Touching you turns me on and I’m not sorry about it… at least not right now.”

“Don’t ever be sorry, ever.” Dean mumbled, he was too relaxed to even stop the words from pouring out. “Love your hands on me, sweetheart.”

Cas shifted so his movements caused his ass to grind down on Dean’s crotch, his bottom lip between his teeth. “Yeah? What else do you love about my hands?”

Dean squirmed slightly under Cas, his hands sliding up his thighs. “Mmm, everything. How big, strong, and yet soft they are. How they feel as they roam my body and around my dick. You’ve got magic inside your fingertips.” He kept his eyes closed, trying to convince his mouth to shut up, but it was as if it had a mind of its own.

“Like this?” Cas’ voice dropped an octave and he moved further down. His knees bracketed Dean’s thighs as he trailed his hands down his torso and curled his fingers around Dean’s waistband, slowly tugging down.

“Fuck... Cas.” Dean lifted his hips for him and bit his lip when his cock sprang free. The tip already had a bead of precome, showing Cas exactly what he does to him.

A thick hand wrapped around Dean’s length and spread the precome before stroking steadily, as if the fucker was actually trying to massage it. “You’re gorgeous, Dean. Just relax, I’m going to take good care of you.”

He nodded like an asshole and gripped Cas’ sheets under him.  _ Fuck... why aren’t we together? Cas is so goddamn perfect. _

“Good boy.” Cas kept twisting and squeezing with his hand, using his other one to rub Dean’s thighs and gently roll his balls between his fingers. “I can’t wait to watch you come for me… I just can’t decide if I want to taste it or watch it cover your gorgeous body.”

Dean whimpered and thrusted up into his fist. “Why not both?” He managed to grunt out before a groan.  _ Goddammit, his fucking hands should be illegal. _

“That’s an excellent idea.” Cas kept that same, teasing pace until Dean was visibly right on the edge, then leaned down to take him in his mouth. He sucked hard, pulling off with a pop right as Dean started coming, then opened his mouth so some landed on his tongue while the rest coated Dean’s stomach. 

Dean watched in awe, thinking of how beautiful Cas looked covered in his come. “Fuck...  _ I _ love  _ you.” _

He froze when he realized what he’d said, but was at least happy it came out in a playful tone.  _ Please don’t flip out. _

All he did was chuckle quietly and lean down to lick up the rest of it. “Does that fulfill your massage dollar… thing?”

“Mmhm... and then some.” Dean wiped his eyes and sat up to kiss Cas, slowly switching their positions as he tasted himself on Cas’ tongue.

He laid Cas back and kissed his way down to his very visibly throbbing cock and mouthed at the fabric. “Your turn.”

Cas twitched, hurriedly shoving his boxers down. “Please, Dean. Fuck, I feel like I’ve been tortured.”

He chuckled and slid his tongue up Cas’ balls, all the way up to the tip. The groan Cas released when he slid the head inside his lips was beautiful, making Dean wish he could hear it every single day. He teased the tip a few more seconds before Cas thrusted back inside of his throat impatiently.

“I should cash in one of my own, here. The one where you blow me with your hands behind your back.” Cas gripped his hair like he wasn’t about to let him up, rolling his hips and groaning. 

Dean tried to pull off to say he could, but Cas’ grip was sound. To work around it, he maneuvered his hands behind him and clasped his wrist while staring up into Cas eyes.  _ Now you kinda get it but you can save your sex money. _

Those blue irises got a lot smaller as Cas’ pupils blew, and he got a little desperate, thrusting hard into Dean’s mouth as he chased his own release. By the time he actually came, Dean was practically hard again just from feeling and tasting Cas.

He swallowed it all down and plopped next to Cas, taking deep breaths as they both stared at the ceiling.

Cas was silent for several long moments, then looked over at Dean. “We’re still good, right? Our friendship?” 

_ Friendship... _ “Course. Always.” Dean closed his eyes and went to sleep, not wanting to talk about being friend-zoned in that moment, but knowing it was better than nothing. As long as Cas was there.

~~~~

Lazy Sunday with Cas was… exactly what he needed. Hell, it seemed like Cas needed it too. It felt so natural for them to cuddle all day and relax. This wasn’t their first Sunday like that, but it was the first one where they got to use currency for sexual favors, and if Dean had a say, all their lazy Sundays would be just like that.

Going to work was hard, especially since he slept in Cas’ bed again. He was so damn cuddly that Dean didn’t think he’d find the strength to get up, but eventually he snuck out without disturbing the sleeping beauty.

Sam asked too many questions before Dean had enough coffee and he ended up overthinking everything the rest of the day. Cas asking about their friendship didn’t help. _Were they okay?_ _Is Cas happy? Do I make him happy? Am I enough? Do I even friggin deserve him?_ And then there were the killer questions. _Will Cas ever feel the same? Will it shatter me when he calls it a day? Will I ruin everything?_

He hated thinking this way. How could he be so insecure when they were apart, and yet so fucking secure when they were together? It felt so right every single time they kissed, how could it be wrong? 

They decided to have another date on Tuesday and it had them driving to the town over and trying out a local diner. They picked the chef’s choice and made up a backstory about the town. It was fun. Cas had an awesome imagination and before they left for home, they blew each other at the local park after dark. 

Wednesday was more of the same, except Matt decided to try and be friends again. Dean was nicer this time — especially after Cas mentioned he hadn’t heard from him in a while — but he still just didn’t like the guy. Maybe it was petty, but the asshat saw Cas’ dick first when they sexted, and Dean just couldn’t let it go.

Thursday they had another date night and Cas was far from thrilled. He hated ramen and the date consisted of copious amounts of ‘plastic noodles’. They got to customize them and make them better, which helped a lot and when Cas tasted Dean’s steak ramen, he actually looked impressed. Not that he ever doubted Dean when it came to food. They got to watch Lady and the Tramp and recreate the spaghetti scene, but Cas went into a rant about how much better it would have been with real pasta.

Dean let him complain, but the first opportunity he saw, he shut him up with his lips, and their living room floor frottage session was absolutely worth it. 

When Friday rolled around, Dean was ready for another date outside the house and texted Cas before he was off.

**Dean:** **_Date night. Wanna scratch one off now? I pick something outside and after dark._ **

**Castiel**

Cas was becoming more exhausted by the day — it was an  _ extreme  _ effort to keep his true feelings to himself, but he didn’t want to risk losing Dean for feelings that might dissipate once the project was over. He stared at Dean’s message and then flipped open the book, looking for a date labeled ‘after dark.’ 

Scratching it off quickly, his stomach flipped when he saw what it was and he picked up his phone. 

**Castiel:** **_We need to dress like high school stereotypes then sneak onto the football field. It says we also have to talk about our favorite and most embarrassing moments from high school while we watch the stars._ **

**Dean:** **_Awesome. Be there in a bit._ **

**Dean:** **_Wait like how we were in high school or can we just pick a stereotype?_ **

The book didn’t actually specify, and Cas weighed his options.  _ Dean was unbelievably sexy in high school… he still is, but… it would be hotter than hell to see him that way again. But I’m also curious what else he’d come up with, so… _

**Castiel:** **_We can pick our own._ **

He set his phone down and raced over to Jask and Ares’ house, knocking on the door. 

Ares opened the door covered in paint. “Oh, hey, Cas. Come in.”

“I don’t mean to bother you, but do you happen to have a leather jacket I could borrow?” He quickly ran Ares through the parameters of the date. “I figured I’d go with the direct opposite of what I actually was.”

Ares chuckled and walked back toward his closet. “Are you guys posting a photo this time? I have to see this.” He handed Cas a jacket and then kept his hand on it. “Are you doing okay? You look... drained.”

“Um…” Cas hesitated, but knew Jask wasn’t home and he could trust Ares. “Honestly, I’m not sure anymore.” He took the jacket and folded it over his arm, but stayed where he was. “I’m in way over my head and I don’t know what to do about it.”

“How so?” Chaos ran over but stopped at Cas’ feet, as though she knew he was sad and rubbed along his leg. “See, even she wants to be there for you.” Ares picked her up and patiently waited for Cas to talk.

“I think it’s obvious that at some point during all of this, my feelings for him… changed. We’re barely halfway through the project and I already feel like the end of it is going to break me in half.” He reached out, scratching Chaos’ head. “And I don’t know what to do. Thanks to one of the dates, we have… favor currency? Massages, sexual favors, things like that. And for some reason, I thought it was a good idea to cash those in on non-date nights, when previously… we kept all of the extracurriculars to nights we had project dates.”

Ares sighed and nodded for Cas to follow him to their couch. “So now you guys are doing everything like a couple, but don’t have the title? That sucks. Is that something he does normally?”

“Yes. Dean has a long, storied history of finding ways to get the perks out of people without the commitment.” Cas frowned, closing his eyes, now absolutely sure that was what was happening. “I’m an idiot.” 

“I wouldn’t jump to that, only because you came to him here, but... how does it feel when you guys are  _ not _ on dates, specifically?” Chaos climbed in Cas’ lap to lay.

“I wasn’t trying to say he’s taking advantage of me, because he’s not. I know I initiated all of this, but that’s my point. This is Dean’s dream situation. He can have sex with me as many times as he wants, knowing that by Christmas, he’ll be free to move on and there’s no true, long term commitment involved. That doesn’t make him a bad person, he’s just… enjoying the situation as he perceives it to be.” Cas paused, thinking about Ares’ true question. “It feels like it always did, honestly. Between dates, I mean. We do the same things, talk about the same things, go the same places. Which just… further proves my point.”

He nodded sadly and sat back slightly. “I see what you mean. That’s... rough. You fell in love, Cas. That’s normal. Has he been with anyone else during this time?”

“No, but that was the deal before we even started. Neither of us were even so much as allowed to flirt with anyone else.” He sighed, pursing his lips in a smile. “But I think maybe I was always in love, and just didn’t realize it until we started crossing lines we can’t uncross.”

“And he’s kept up his end, right? He doesn’t seem the type to go too long between conquests so if he is sticking to it, I think it says something. But I’ll be the last person to make excuses for him. He needs to know what he’s doing to you.”

He nodded. “That’s the thing though, Ares. He’s getting laid at least three or four days a week. More, now that we’ve got that fake money. He doesn’t need to find another conquest when he’s got a perfectly willing participant living in his house. And as far as him knowing what he’s doing to me? No. I can’t tell him, because then we’ll have to call the project off and all of this will have been for nothing. And I also don’t want to go back to living on campus.”

“But what if he does feel the same and he’s holding back for your sake?” He looked like he wanted to say more but didn’t know what to say.

“Then I suppose eventually one of us will have to speak up. We both know it won’t be Dean, and I don’t think I’ll ever have the spine for it.” He stood, glancing at the jacket in his arms and nodding to Ares. “Thank you for the jacket, I’ll be sure to send you a picture.” 

“Okay, but if it’s too much... call it off. You have more than enough shit to write a paper, Cas.” Ares walked him to the door and Chaos followed too. “Just don’t hurt yourself over it.”

Cas walked home in deep thought, slower than he should have when he saw Dean’s car. He took a deep breath and walked inside, happy Dean was in the shower and he had a few moments to fix his face.

He changed into dark wash jeans, an old pair of Converse, and a plain black v-neck. Cas frowned at his expression in the mirror and then took his glasses off, putting his contacts in and slicked his hair back.  _ I look more like a half-assed greaser than a bad boy, but… whatever. This is as good as it gets.  _ He huffed, making his way downstairs. 

Dean came down a few moments later with glasses and a godsdamn sweater vest. His blush was so adorable it was hard to believe he was acting when he nervously waved and said “Hi.”

Recognizing the fact that Dean was already in character, Cas shifted his weight to one foot and quirked an eyebrow. “Well, well, well. Where’s your pocket protector? Do I need to steal your lunch money?”

Dean bit back a laugh and reached in his pocket. “All I got is this fake dollar for some breakfast in bed.” He handed it over and shoved his hands in his pockets.

Cas handed it back, shaking his head. “Cash that in yourself, I already had an idea for it. However, I will steal your car keys. I’m driving.” 

Dean’s face gave away how he nearly left character for a second but he straightened up and handed Cas the keys. “Fine.” He turned and walked towards the door. “Comin’, hot shot?”

Temporarily dumbfounded that Dean let him get away with that, it took him a couple of seconds to move. “Hell yeah.” He walked past Dean, smacking his ass as he went.  _ We’re in character. Acting makes all of this so much easier.  _ Cas slid in Baby’s drivers’ seat and grinned as he started her up. 

Dean climbed in and watched Cas like a hawk the entire drive. He never once turned on the radio and broke character at least two times, but Cas thought it was adorable. They made it to the field in one piece, and Cas gladly handed the keys back over. “Hey, thanks… nerd.”  _ I’m terrible at this.  _

Dean took the keys and climbed out of the car. “Let’s go, bully.” 

They walked over to the field and Dean laid out in the middle, staring up at the stars. “Alright, what was your favorite part of high school?”

“You’re going to laugh at me, but… I loved learning, especially research papers. I love the organization of it… researching, compiling evidence to support a point and turning it into a compelling argument, or a comprehensive guide.” Cas blushed, rubbing his palm over the turf. “What was yours?”

Dean huffed a laugh, and cleared his throat. “Yeah um... that... same.”

“Shut up. What was it really? Gym class? Getting blown in the bathroom?”

“Second one for sure. Not just the bathroom, everywhere. Right here, over there, locker room, classroom, janitors closet. You name it, I was blown there.”

Cas rolled his eyes but wasn’t surprised, he’d known Dean in high school and that wasn’t a shock. “Do you even  _ have _ an embarrassing moment?”

“Yeah. I got caught getting blown in the locker room by the entire football team.”

_ Is he serious? _ “That’s not embarrassing. At all. They probably high fived you and got you drunk in celebration.”

“They did, but still. My entire dick was on display when she ran out and left me there alone with them.” He sounded as though he really thought this might be embarrassing.

Cas frowned. “Dean, your penis is immaculate. That’s not embarrassing. At all. Try again.”

“Yeah... that was actually the first time I got a dude's number. Alright fine, one time I was with a chick under the bleachers and she asked me strip for her, and then she snatched all my clothes and ran away.”

“That one sounds promising. What happened next?” Cas focused on the stars, vaguely sure he actually remembered this happening.

“I was left under the bleachers naked. Is that not embarrassing enough? I had to run to the locker room naked! You never heard the rumors?”

And then it hit him. “I heard the rumor that Rhonda Hurley saw you running naked and then let you take her virginity. Again… that’s  _ not  _ embarrassing, Dean.” He sat up, agitated for absolutely no reason. 

“Whatever. What is embarrassing then? Your turn.” Dean’s face shot in his direction as he waited.

Clenching his jaw, Cas looked away. “I had actual embarrassing moments, Dean. Abaddon knocked all my books down in front of the only boy I had the courage to hit on, and he laughed so hard he couldn’t breathe. Crowley pulled my pants down in the middle of the school assembly on bullying. Don’t you remember that? On the  _ one  _ day I was wearing Spider-Man briefs because I hadn’t done laundry in a few days? Or the time I got food poisoning out to eat with my parents and…” He couldn’t bring himself to finish that sentence, his cheeks a deep red.  _ This was a horrible idea. Fuck that book.  _ He stood, taking off the jacket. “I’m sorry that you felt flaunting your sexual prowess was embarrassing, Dean, but some of us weren’t as lucky. Can we go home?”

“Cas.” Dean stood up and reached out for him, quickly retracting his hand. “I’m sorry. I punched Crowley for that remember? I...” He sighed and took Cas’ hand. “I’m sorry, this was supposed to be fun. Let’s just go home.” Dean grabbed the jacket for Cas and led the way back to the car.

_ Great, I just ruined the date because I can’t get over the fact that he was cooler than me in high school. No, it’s more than that. We don’t belong on this football field together, because we’re not even in the same league. I’m just now realizing that for some reason. _ “Yes... let’s go home.”


	21. When The Levee Breaks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here, you get this chapter a day early since I’ll be posting one shots all weekend for Halloween. Enjoy!

**Dean**

_ Alright, I royally fucked this up. What else is new? _

Cas had been different since that damn bullshit, high school memory lane date. Dean didn’t mean to ruin it, he was honestly embarrassed by those damn things but apparently they weren’t good enough and now he felt like shit for having a decent time in high school. Regardless, why the fuck was this even a thing? They were in their 20’s now. High school was in the friggin review mirror, why still get upset over it? Nothing could change it anyway. 

They were both quiet all of Sunday and didn’t even discuss another date. It was very different from the last Sunday by a landslide. Last Sunday was warm where this one was… cold. No other way to put it. If Dean didn’t admit he was annoyed by the turn of events, he’d be lying. Why did this date trigger Cas so bad? And why the hell was it all Dean’s fault?

Once Tuesday came and went, he didn’t even know how to open the damn conversation.  _ Hey Cas, wanna go on another shitshow of a date? No? Sounds good. Fuck!  _ When Thursday evening came and Cas once again made no mention of another date, Dean was completely deflated.  _ I lost him. I couldn’t even keep someone as good as Cas while fake dating. Did he fake break up with me and I didn’t fucking get the hint? What the fuck is even happening anymore? _

When he got off on Friday he got a lecture from Sam about his shit attitude all week and then sat in his car for about forty-five minutes before he finally texted Cas.

**Dean: Hey Cas… date tonight?**

If his hands weren’t so dirty from work, he would have chewed off his nails, but instead he drummed on his steering wheel while he waited for Cas to text back. The ding of his phone made him flinch and when he read the message, his stomach dropped out his asshole. 

**Cas:** **_I’m sorry, Dean. I’m really not feeling well. Take the weekend off, I’m sure you miss your friends anyway_ **

**Dean:** **_Feel better_ **

He didn’t even go home. He couldn’t. He couldn’t walk around their home in some weird silence with Cas, not again. Instead, he parked his car at the house and walked over to Jask’s. He used the key, went straight to their liquor cabinet, and then jumped in their shower. 

This wasn’t the first time he made himself at home there, but it was the first time he had a buddy and Chaos was on his feet the entire time. Once he was in a pair of Jask’s sweatpants, he went down to start dinner for them and tried to act like he belonged there when Ares walked in with a shocked face. Lucky for Dean, he was already buzzed. “Hey, Ares. I made us all dinner, is J on the way?”

“He… should be home in a half hour or so.” Ares set his stuff down and tilted his head. “Not that I’m complaining, but… shouldn’t you be on a date? A date  _ not  _ in my house?”

“Nope. Cas doesn’t wanna date me anymore. But it’s fine, cause not only was I dumped while fake dating, I also lost my best friend. Shit’s... fine.” Dean shot back his third glass and stirred the spaghetti. “Food’s done. Do you have garlic bread? Doesn’t matter, I’ll make some.” He opened the pantry and pulled out their bread, keeping himself busy while Ares stared at him like he was some sad puppy.

“He finally told you, huh? I wasn’t sure he would.” Ares came over, helping him with dinner. “I’m sorry, Dean.”

“Told me what?” He stopped what he was doing and met Ares’ eyes. “What do you know?”

He looked like a deer caught in the headlights. “Just that… he knew you guys weren’t on the same page but he hadn’t said anything because he didn’t want it to ruin your friendship and needed to finish the project for his paper.” 

“Yeah, completely different pages.”  _ Fucking different books. I actually fell for him. Nothing to do with a damn project. _ “Course we were. I mean how can someone like me—”  _ Ever get someone like him. _ Dean walked over to pour another drink. “I got nothin’, Ares... Nothin’. And he deserves everything.”

Ares actually looked  _ mad  _ for a moment, which didn’t make any sense. “Where is he, Dean?”

“I dunno. At home probably. I didn’t even check. That’s why I’m here in your boyfriend’s sweatpants.” Dean eyed him, wanting to know what he said that would make him worried about Cas.  _ Cas is fine. I’m the sad one here, asshat. _

He left without a word, and Dean was halfway through eating alone when J finally showed up. “Uhh... D? Not that I’m complaining, but did you body-swap my boyfriend or something?”

“Yup. You could do a lot worse, ya know.” He pointed his fork at J and took another bite. He was full on drunk now, but he felt better. Mostly because he couldn’t really feel much at all.

Jask sat down and helped himself, not seeming fazed. “That mean you’re finally gonna blow me?”

“Yup. Why the fuck not?” Dean took another drink and then eyed Jask. “Your boyfriend is at my house checking on Cas, even though Cas is fine.”

It didn’t seem like Jask had a clue what to do with him, so he shut up and ate a few bites. “So… are you gonna elaborate, or am I supposed to guess what the hell you’re talking about? Did you and Cas get in a fight or something? And if you did, why the hell are you here?”

“I can’t look at him right now. It fucking hurts.” Dean polished off another drink. “He doesn’t wanna date me anymore. It’s been almost a week since he’s touched me  _ or _ kissed me. Fuck.” He leaned forward and smacked his forehead on the table.

“Holy shit. You’re actually in love with him.” Jask set down his fork and sat back in his chair, looking at Dean like he was an alien. “You’re in love with Cas.” 

“So?” Dean sat up looked at the shocked expression on his face. “What? How can I not be? I think... I always was. But it doesn’t matter. He doesn’t feel the same.”

“Shit. Are you sure? Did you ask him?” Jask frowned, watching his friend. “You heard those words come out of his mouth?”

“Didn’t have to. I can see it. He can’t even look at me right now because I got all... boyfriend-y.” Dean ran a frustrated hand down his face. “All he’ll ever see is the douchebag I was back in high school.”

Jask threw a meatball at him. “That’s absolute bullshit, D. Tell me what happened, because I’m eight thousand percent sure he’s been in love with you since the day he laid eyes on you. You  _ have _ to be reading something wrong.”

Dean cleaned the food off his face and told him about their last date. “It seemed like once he remembered who I was in high school, he couldn’t stand me anymore.”

“Sounds like he was just having a hard time dealing with those memories being brought back up, D. And to hear that  _ your _ embarrassing moments weren’t embarrassing at all, but his sounded traumatizing? Did he shit his pants? Is that what I’m taking from that last one? He probably spent a long time trying to bury those memories. I doubt that shit had anything to do with you.”

“Okay, so how does that explain the last week? I never bullied him in high school, why is it my fault?” Dean felt even more confused than before.

Jask looked at a loss for a moment, and then rolled his eyes. “He probably thought the reminder of who  _ he _ was in high school turned you off.”

“So it’s my fault?” he asked in a confused tone. “He was the one that pulled away, though.”

Groaning, Jask tipped his head back. “My god, you two are stupid. No, it’s not your fault. It’s not his fault. It’s not anyone’s fault except the fact that you two can’t seem to be honest with each other.”

_ Not anyone’s fault... what the hell is going on?  _ “Can’t be honest about what? Am I supposed to walk in there and say ‘hey, fuck your project, I’m actually in love with you, please don’t hate me’? Why ruin our friendship because I don’t know how to keep my emotions in check?”

“You’re making me want to pull my hair out of my damn skull. Yes, D. Yes. That’s exactly what you’re supposed to to say.” Jask got up to start cleaning. “Your friendship seems to be dead in the water already. What’s the harm in telling him?”

Dean stood up and stumbled towards the kitchen. “Cause as of now, we can put this shit in a box and pretend this all never happened. But pandora doesn’t go back in the box, J. That’s not how it works.” He hiccuped and walked over to their couch, plopping down with a groan. “M’so horny and I miss his... everything.”

“I’m not kidding, you’re on my list. Fuck, you’re on Ares’ list, too. If you’re serious about letting shit with Cas end…” Jask trailed off, shaking his head. “No. Damnit. Bad.” He sucked in a calming breath and started talking to himself. “Dean Winchester horny and drunk on your couch does  _ not  _ give you permission to be an ass.” 

Dean chuckled and laid back staring up at the ceiling. His eyelids were heavy and this fun night of drinking with J turned out to be... not so fun. “I don’t deserve him, J.” He heard J respond from a distance, but he was asleep before his brain could process the words.

**Castiel**

Cas looked up at Ares as he barged in with a curious, yet foreboding expression. “Uhm… yes, come in.” 

“What’s up with your  _ fake _ boyfriend and why is he acting like there was a  _ real _ breakup?” He asked bluntly.

Defiant, Cas sat up straighter. “I didn’t break up with him. I needed a couple of days off from these ridiculous dates. I didn’t think it was the end of the world.”

“He missed that memo.” Ares sat on the couch and faced him. “Did you tell him you were in love with him?”

He shook his head, leaning forward to grab his drink from the table. “No. I’ve barely spoken to him. I ruined our last date and didn’t know how to snap out of the shitty mindset that put me in, so… I’ve been ignoring him. I feel terrible, but I can’t seem to get myself under control anymore.”

“He’s like the conductor of the Hot Mess Express right now, Cas. He thinks you hate him and he wasn’t making much sense as to why he thinks that.”

Cas felt even lower, which he didn’t even know was possible. “I could never hate him. I just... you’ve met him, Ares. We’re not in the same league. And please... don’t placate me. You know it’s true, everyone knows it’s true, it’s fact. Talking about our very different high school appearances reminded me of that, and I just needed a few days to clear my head. I’ll fix it.”  _ I don’t know how, but I will. _

“Let him fix it. You’re already giving way too much of yourself, Cas. You needed a break because you’re exhausted with this entire thing.”

He shook his head. “It’s not his fault, Ares. Besides, I’m the one that started  _ all _ of this. It’s not his responsibility to fix it.”  _ And I’m afraid if I leave it up to him, it’ll never happen. _ “Thank you for telling me.”

“Please don’t make me go back there. I think he’ll pass out within an hour based on how he was drinking, but let me just hang here for a bit. Otherwise I’ll end up slapping some sense into him, and I know it isn’t my place.”

Cas nodded dumbly and gestured for Ares to get comfortable. They watched a couple of movies and otherwise hung out in silence, and after a few hours, it was clear Dean wasn’t coming home. “You can stay, if you want.”

“Thanks, but I’ll head home. He’s passed out on the couch, I’m sure. Want me to update you?” he offered as he walked towards the door.

“Just make sure he’s okay.” Cas smiled slightly and got up, locking the door behind Ares and making his way up the stairs. But instead of going to his own bed... he went to Dean’s.

~~~~

The next morning, Cas stayed in Dean’s bed as long as he dared, but when he heard the sliding glass door, he ran out in a hurry. He nearly fell down the stairs trying to get to the bottom before Dean noticed anything, and looked at him wide-eyed when he caught himself. “Dean! Are you… are you okay? I was worried when you didn’t come home.”

He groaned and rubbed his temples. “Ugh... Got way too drunk. This is why I don’t do tequila. H—how was your night?”

“It was... fine. Quiet.” Cas stared at his feet, dreading what was going to come next. “I feel better, and I know I don’t have a right to ask this of you, but... do you want to go on another date? With... me? Today?”

Dean stood up straighter and nodded. “Yeah, course, Cas.” He pulled him in for a tight hug and Cas could smell the Jose seeping from his pores.

He didn’t care, he’d gotten a temporary fill of Dean’s scent from his pillows. Cas held him close and wanted to apologize, but wasn’t sure how to say it. “Dean, I...”

“S’okay, Cas. Sorry I’ve been distant. I thought you remembered how much you hated high-school-me or something, but I shouldn’t have gotten upset if you did. I was kinda a dick back then.”

_ That’s what this was about?  _ Cas pulled back just far enough to look at him. “Dean, we were friends back then. I didn’t hate you then, and I don’t hate you now. That’s insane.” 

“I thought you did. I know you hated guys like me, so I just thought deep down, you hated me… but then I won you over with my charm.”

Cas shook his head, leaning up to kiss Dean’s cheek. “Don’t be ridiculous. But actually… can we skip the date? I’d rather cash in one of my fake money things.” 

“Yeah... which one?” Dean touched his cheek softly.

“Slow dancing in the kitchen. Do you think you can handle that after a... really long shower?” Cas laughed quietly, Dean really did reek.

He chuckled and nodded. “You like it.” Dean pulled him in against his chest and smothered him in it. “I’ll shower right now. Want me to dress a certain way?”

“No, just... be comfortable, okay?” Cas headed up the stairs with him and went to his own bathroom, and it wasn’t until he was in the shower that he realized Dean would absolutely be able to tell someone else slept in his bed.

But thankfully, he didn’t mention it when he came down a while later. He walked straight to the record player and nodded at Cas. “What you wanna hear, sweetheart?”

“Anything, as long as we can dance to it.” Cas moved into the kitchen and slid a little bit thanks to his socks, then gripped the counter and grinned. “But hurry up before I break a bone.”

“Seriously don’t know how someone could be so adorable.” He put something on and walked back over to Cas, pulling him in and staring down into his eyes.

Cas couldn’t hold his gaze for long and tucked his cheek against Dean’s chest, rocking with him slowly. There, caged in Dean’s arms, he found it easier to talk. “I just get overwhelmed sometimes. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have ruined our date, or let it ruin a whole week.”

“It’s okay. Really. I ruined a date too, remember? Nothin’s perfect... but we can’t give up. We —” Dean paused. “Your grade depends on it right?”

He recognized the olive branch when he saw it and nodded, hating himself for lying. “Yes, it does, and that’s why I got overwhelmed. I ruined the date because of those stupid memories, and then convinced myself I was going to ruin the whole project and then basically my entire collegiate career. I’m sorry, it’s ridiculous,”  _ and not true, _ “and I shouldn’t have overreacted that badly.”

“Don’t gotta say sorry anymore. Okay, sweetheart? I’m here, not goin’ anywhere... ever.” Dean kissed the side of his head and slid his hand up and down Cas’ back as they moved.

He stayed like that as long as he dared, until he physically couldn’t take it for one more second. Cas squeezed Dean and then broke away from him, trying to calm the hurricane in his chest enough to speak. “Dean… I’m sorry. I can’t do this.”

Dean reached out and grabbed Cas’ hand. “Do wha—”

“No, I…”  _ Just tell him. It’s too late.  _ “I’m in love with you, Dean. I’m so in love with you I can’t breathe half the time, and I…” His traitorous eyes started watering and he blinked furiously, begging himself to just get through it. “I can’t keep pretending like I don’t when we’re slow dancing and  _ pretending _ to be in love for some stupid, irrelevant project. I’m sorry. I’m so… so fucking sorry.” 

“Cas.” Dean pulled him back in and gripped his chin. “Cas, I’m in love with you, too. Don’t you feel it? I’ve never felt this way in my  _ life. _ I only want this with you.”

That hurricane might as well have been slamming screen doors and blowing houses over in his chest. Cas’ eyes snapped to Dean’s and he sucked in a breath, searching for any sign of a lie.  _ Did he — am I hallucinating?  _ “You’re serious?” 

“Uh... yeah. You ever hear of me slow dancing with... anyone?  _ Ever?  _ You make me want to do things I never wanted to do before. I didn’t want to do them because I’ve never loved anyone before, but... I know it’s this. I know you didn’t want to fall for me. I know I got nothin’ more to offer than what we got right here, but... I want this. If you’re willing to give me a shot. A real one.”

“Yes,” Cas said simply, not trusting himself enough to speak more than that. He wanted to tell Dean he was wrong, that he had  _ everything  _ to give, that  _ Cas  _ was the one coming into this empty handed… but instead, he kissed Dean. Not like the others they’d shared, but a real one, the kind that starts in your toes and rockets up through your body until you feel like you could burst with it. Dean was right about one thing;  _ this  _ was love. 

Dean melted into him and suddenly they couldn’t tell where one began and the other ended. Every inch of their bodies pressed together, and when Dean slid his tongue into Cas’ mouth, he knew they weren’t making it out of that kitchen. 

Desperate to feel more of Dean, Cas made a frenzied attempt at pulling Dean’s shirt over his head. He nearly elbowed Dean in the face trying to remove his own, but the second they were both undressed, his lips found heated skin. 

Dean lifted Cas up to straddle him and backed against the wall, slowly melting to the floor while sucking on Cas’ neck. “Need you, baby.” His hands roamed down to grab Cas’ ass and spread his cheeks apart, rutting into him with a groan.

They didn’t have a damn thing they needed to make this work properly, but it didn’t matter. A little bit of discomfort couldn’t dull the sheer, radiating pleasure and happiness building up in Cas as he reached down to grip himself. It wasn’t graceful, or pretty, or perfect… but the desperate slide of Dean’s cock against Cas’ ass, and Cas’ cock against his own hand and Dean’s stomach had them coming between messy, heated kisses. 

They sat there in their mess awhile, breathing with their foreheads pressed together. It was obvious Dean didn’t know what to say, and quite frankly, neither did Cas, but that was okay. They were finally, truly together.


	22. Free to Be You and Me

**Dean**

When Dean woke up the next morning he wasn’t sure if it was all a dream, but when he smelled he was in Cas’ bed with Cas on his chest, he knew it was real. 

He also knew Cas slept in his bed the night before, and if that didn’t say real love, Dean didn’t know what did.  _ Maybe breaking in your friends house and drinking all their alcohol? Nah, Cas’ way was much cuter.  _ He kissed his head, inhaling his perfect scent as he started to stir. “M’sorry,” Dean whispered, “didn’t mean to wake you, sweetheart.”

“Shh. You’re not allowed to move until I’ve sufficiently convinced myself that last night actually happened.” Cas nuzzled in closer, splaying his hand across Dean’s opposite side and throwing his leg over him. “Which might be never, by the way… so I hope you’re comfortable.”

Dean chuckled and gripped Cas’ leg to hold him there. “Never been more comfortable, handsome.”  _ Struggling to believe it’s all real too, Cas. _

Soft lips planted themselves against Dean’s chest. “So, you meant it, then? This is real for you, too? It wasn’t just something you said to stop me from pulling back again?”

“That doesn’t make sense, Cas. Why would I just say something to keep you from pulling back if I wasn’t in love with you? I meant it all, and I’m sorry I took so long to realize.”

Cas shook his head, kissing Dean deeply. “Don’t apologize. I knew a while ago and just didn’t say anything, and for that… I’m sorry. I didn’t want to push you away.”

“Not going anywhere. You could never push me away, sweetheart. I know all your skeletons, and I love them, too. I love you for you.”

“Yes, well… I didn’t know that at the time.” His voice was small, and even in the dim light, Dean could see Cas blushing. “Is it okay for me to say I’m incredibly, insanely, stupidly relieved?” 

“Yes. Me too.” Dean rolled him over onto his back and hovered over him. “You’re so beautiful. I dunno what you see in me, but I hope you never stop seein’ it.”

Cas reached up to lightly grip Dean’s face. “I see everything, Dean. Selflessness and love and kindness… bravery. Not to mention, you’re easily the best looking human being ever created by God or science.” He grinned, kissing him carefully. “I see a future when I look at you. I always have, I think… I think I just misunderstood it.”

Dean could feel his blush but ignored it.  _ “That _ good looking, huh?” He nuzzled into Cas’ neck and kissed it softly.

Moaning, Cas nodded and dug his nails into Dean’s back, silently asking for more.  _ You got it, sweetheart.  _ Dean clamped his mouth around Cas’ jugular and slid his tongue over the skin, then sucked a mark there as Cas’ back arched off the bed. “Dean… do it again. Mark me. Show me I’m yours.”

Hardening, Dean kissed, bit, and sucked marks all over Cas’ neck and shoulders, then started adding more down his torso. Cas was shaking, begging, “Please, don’t stop. Fuck, don't stop,” and nothing on earth could actually make him. 

“Not gonna stop, Cas. Not ever.” Dean used his teeth to snap his waistband, and that seemed to wake something up inside of Cas. He gripped Dean’s shoulders and hauled him back up to kiss him like he was drowning, pulling their hips together and rubbing his thinly-clothed cock against Dean’s. 

For the second time since they started all of this, Cas came inside of his briefs. The wetness of the fabric only added friction for Dean, and with a choked off, desperate grunt, Dean rutted furiously against him until he came. 

Dean met Cas’ eyes and then took in all the desperate marks sprinkled all over his body. “Oops. Your turn, baby.” He bared his neck for Cas. “Mark me yours.”

Cas took his time leaving even more of them than Dean had, then leaned back to admire his handiwork. “I could get used to this, you know. Not necessarily coming in my pants all the time, but… seeing you and knowing you’re mine.” He offered Dean a small smile and then rubbed his hand over his wet crotch. “But I hope we never get less needy for it.”

Dean chuckled and licked his lips. “Well you  _ did  _ say I’m the hottest... what was it? Person ever, or somethin’? Course I can make you come in your pants. I know for a fact you’re better lookin’ than me, so there’s no hope for my poor boxers.”

Wiggling, Cas shifted so he could rub his nose in Dean’s crotch. “I’m not complaining.”

“Let’s shower together. I wanna clean you and mark up that ass.” Dean unintentionally rutted up into Cas’ face, making him moan. 

Getting into the shower was hard, but they managed to maneuver themselves in between kisses and Cas went to work licking up the water running down Dean’s body. “I’ll never get enough of you, Dean.”

“Fuck... hope not.” Dean gripped Cas’ wet hair and pulled him in for a sloppy kiss. He knew he loved Cas, but he didn’t realize how much he’d been holding back this entire time. He didn’t want to go a single damn moment without touching Cas in some way. “Ima have to start taking you to work with me, huh?” He leaned down more to bite along Cas’ shoulder.

“I think my professors would notice I was missing,” Cas gasped. “But can…” he moaned as Dean moved down to tease his nipple. “I want to cash in… the one where we have sex in one of the houses you’re building. Tonight.”

Dean bit his lip and his cock twitched with need. “Fuck yeah. Can I... fuck you? I miss this ass so much.” He reached around to grip Cas’ ass.

He nodded quickly, running his fingers through Dean’s hair. “Yes. I’ll prep before we leave.”

“Good.” Dean kissed him again and then pulled back. “I ordered that maid outfit like the day after we played. Should be here soon.”  _ Please tell me you’re still down. _

Cas looked almost mischievous. “Good. And in the meantime… I’ll have another surprise for you tonight… if you’re good.”

“I’m always good. What is it?”  _ Hate surprises. _ But for some reason, he knew he’d enjoy whatever the hell it was regardless.

Shaking his head, Cas bit his lip and stepped out of the shower. He refused to answer any questions and pretty much didn’t utter a word until after dark when it was finally time to go. Cas walked downstairs and met Dean in the living room, bundled up in that damn trench coat he usually only saw for funerals or special occasions. 

“Nice trench. Gonna do my taxes while we’re out?” Dean walked over and pulled him in by the fabric. “Boyfriend.”  _ Shit, that was lame. _

Cas lowered his glasses down the bridge of his nose and raised an eyebrow, which would’ve looked ridiculous with the outfit if he wasn’t so damn hot. “It’s not tax season, Dean. You know that, right? Tell me you know that, and that you filed several months ago.”

Dean rolled his eyes with a grin and pulled Cas along to the car. "Cas you know damn well you put post-it notes on my bathroom mirror the entirety of March and early April until I tell you they're done.” They got in the car and Dean started driving towards the house they have been working on the past few weeks.  _ At least it has walls now. _

“I’m going to start in January this coming year, by the way. With the notes.”

"I don't doubt you... wait, does this mean you get to boss me around even more?" Dean grabbed his hand and kissed it.

“Oh, I hope so.” Cas smiled softly and once they arrived, he got out, keeping that damned coat tucked tightly around him. For the first time, Dean noticed the way he seemed to be walking on his toes… and didn’t seem to be wearing any pants. 

Dean walked up behind him and grabbed his ass, trying to figure out what was going on, but Cas moved away and slapped his hand, nodding for him to hurry up and open the door.

Once inside, fresh wood clouded their senses and Dean reached out for Cas again. “I’ve always wanted to fuck surrounded by this smell.” His cock twitched and began tenting his jeans.

Cas tilted his head and looked around, crossing his arms over his chest. “Do you have work lights in here?” Dean nodded and flipped on one of the standing LED work lights, watching the way it cast shadows behind Cas from its position on the floor. Cas took a deep breath and dropped the trench coat, revealing the hard lines of his body and a strappy, lacy jock strap. He spread his arms and spun in a slow circle, and Dean could’ve sworn by the way the angled shadows hit the wall that it looked like Cas had wings. The lace hugged his waist and faded to leather straps that perfectly cupped his ass. Dean reached him in two strides and bit across his back harder than he’d meant to.

“Jesus Christ on a cracker, Cas.” He grabbed Cas’ ass and spread his cheeks so he could press his clothed hardness between them, growling when he felt what was sure to be a plug. “Fuck, I love you.”

“So you like it? I wasn’t sure… but I assumed from our mutual interest in the maid outfit…” Cas turned, kissing Dean hard and then dropping to his knees. “May I?”

“Yes, may you... you may? You know what I mean.” Dean tugged on Cas’ hair, not sure how to find words, but he decided right then he needed to see Cas covered in fucking lace and sawdust.  _ Hope my baby isn’t afraid to get dirty. _

Cas undid Dean’s pants and opened for him, sucking him greedily as he reached down to palm himself over that jockstrap. 

Dean pulled him off and took a step back to admire Cas on his knees. His lips were already plump from the blowjob and his eyes were blown with raw desire. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, Cas.” 

He shrugged off his shirt and shoved his jeans down further, stepping back in to slide his leaking cock down Cas’ throat.

It was messy and hotter than hell, and way too soon, Dean was shoving his head away again even as Cas tried to stay latched on. His cock was straining through the lace and poking out the top, leaking already. Cas turned around, bending over on all fours and arching his back, revealing a black plug with a gem almost the exact shade of his eyes. 

With a growl, Dean practically pounced on Cas. He bit down his back and gripped the plug, moving it in circles so he could listen to Cas moan. “All prepped for me baby? This ass mine?” He slapped Cas’ ass and returned to the plug, his other hand sliding over the tip of Cas’ dick.

“Yes… fuck,” Cas gasped. “Yours. Now prove it… fuck me, Dean. Take me.” He reached over, digging in the pocket of the fallen trench coat and pulled back a bottle of lube, handing it to Dean. 

He worked out the plug a little too fast, just as eager as Cas, and once his cock was coated with lube, he slid inside with a groan. “So fucking tight.” Dean bottomed out and sat there, moving in a circle before pulling out and slamming back in. “Mine.”  _ All fucking mine. _

**Castiel**

Cas dropped his chest to the ground, and Dean gripped the lace and leather straps as he pounded into his ass. That alone was hot enough Cas nearly came, his cheek pressed hard against the floor with every brutal, amazing thrust. He reached up to rub the tip of his cock, knowing damn well that would be all he needed here. 

“Cas! This ass is fucking perfect.” Dean abruptly slid out and commanded, “Roll over.” 

When Cas landed on his back, he saw the dust cloud around them and could feel the rough wood particles under his back. He shivered, loving the feeling. “I need you, Dean. Get back here.” Cas spread his legs and bit his lip as he stroked over the barely-there fabric covering him. 

When Dean finally sunk back inside, they groaned as their mouths crashed together, and Dean began fucking into him, holding Cas’ bottom lip between his teeth.

Two fingers rubbing the lace over his cock was all it took for Cas to cry out, pulling his lip back and clutching Dean’s hair as he emptied all over himself in a spurt so powerful, some of it coated the sawdust next to him. “Dean! Fuck, don’t stop. Don’t stop…”

“Fuck, that’s so hot.” Dean sat up and ran his hands through Cas’ come, smearing it around Cas’ torso while still fucking him roughly. He gripped Cas’ neck and came hard with a groan, and the dual sensations had Cas practically having an out of body experience. 

_ Nothing will ever compare to this.  _ He pulled Dean down into a kiss that went from heated to lazy, his body buzzing. 

Dean smiled against Cas’ lips and pulled back to look at him. “I really,  _ really _ like this outfit, Cas.”

“And I really,  _ really  _ love you.” Cas smiled and looked around, grimacing at the mess they made. “Do you think anyone will notice? Will you get in trouble?” 

“Nope. I’m basically the boss here, and Sam doesn’t count.” Dean kissed him and slid out of his ass. His tongue peeked out between his lips as he reached down to push his finger inside Cas and play with his come, which sent a rush of something foreign through Cas’ body. 

“Holy shit.” He was beyond sensitive from the plug and the sex, but… it felt incredible enough that his cock have a feeble twitch. “Keep doing that.”

“Yeah?” Dean slid another finger in so he could get deeper and leaned down to nip his thigh. “You know you just came in Matt’s workspace?”

Cas pinched his brows, trying to concentrate as his cock insisted on trying to thicken. “Who? I don’t… who?” He spread his legs further, rocking down on Dean’s fingers, trying to take them deeper. “Another one.” 

Dean just grinned and shoved in a third finger, leaning over to suck a mark on Cas’ thigh. “Touch yourself for me. Show me you love this.”

“Ungh.” Somewhere in Cas’ mind, he knew that wasn’t a word, but he didn’t care. He pushed the jockstrap down below his balls and furiously stripped his cock, moaning incoherently as Dean’s fingers roughly stuffed him full.

“Fuck, Cas.” Dean was full on finger fucking him now, staring down as Cas feverishly stroked his now fully hard cock. “Gonna come for me like this, baby? Gonna come from my fingers all over yourself again?” His left hand ran up Cas’ thigh and squeezed so hard Cas nearly cried out in a mix of pure pain and pleasure. Dean growled and leaned down to lick up Cas’ precome off his fingers, which only served to turn Cas into a whimpering, writhing mess. 

He came with a strangled cry, his entire body overstimulated to the point where coming almost hurt. It was absolutely, by far, the best he’d ever felt in his entire life. “D—Dean…” Cas rubbed himself through it, his other limbs going limp as his thighs started to shake. 

“I got you.” Dean leaned down and kissed him slowly, his left hand running along Cas’ side to ground him. “I got you, sweetheart.”

Cas held onto Dean like a lifeline, a thousand things coursing through his mind and body. He lost track of how long they laid there like that, with Cas slipping in and out of reality, but eventually he regained himself enough to open his eyes. “Can we go home? Maybe get some pie on the way back?” 

"Have I mentioned I love you?" Dean stood up and helped Cas to his feet. They were both covered in dust and come, but neither of them had any regrets. "We should do this in all the new houses."

Chuckling quietly, Cas wrapped his arms around Dean and took a moment to listen to his heartbeat. “Yes. We should.”

~~~~

They’d slept almost the entire next day, and come Monday, all Cas wanted to do was go home and ride Dean until they were screaming loud enough to wake Jask and Ares up. But he’d promised himself he’d go see his father; it had been too long, and for once, he actually had good news. 

He made his way up to Jagger’s floor and knocked, then let himself in. “Dad?”

"Castiel." Jagger sat at the edge of his bed, looking as though he wanted to stand. He looked much stronger than the last time Cas visited him, and it made him feel hopeful. "How are you, son? What's on your neck?" He squinted in concern and Cas could see when he knew exactly what it was. "I take it you are in a relationship now?"

Clearing his throat did nothing to banish the redness in his cheeks. “Yes. Do you remember Dean? Dean Winchester?” Even saying it filled Cas’ chest with pride, and he sat down across from his father with a smile he couldn’t hide if he was paid to. 

Jagger smiled, his eyes telling Cas he absolutely remembered Dean. “I’m so happy for you. That was a long time coming.”

“You’re telling me.” He laughed quietly, shaking his head. “I honestly don’t understand why it took us so long to see it.”

“Because you both meant more to each other than your own internal desires. You both felt selfish to want more when you knew you were lucky to have even a small piece of the other. That is true love, son.” Jagger’s eyes watered, surely thinking of Cas’ mother.

Having his father lucid enough to be handing out wisdom again had tears pricking the corners of his own eyes, and the two chuckled quietly at their emotional reactions. Cas hugged Jagger as tightly as he dared, and then spent the rest of the afternoon talking about how the dates with Dean had gone, and some of the more appropriate bits of Jagger’s relationship to Cas’ mom. 

It was amazing — hearing those stories without feeling the guilt that normally accompanied them. Sure, he’d always feel it to some degree, but Cas was finally starting to accept that the accident wasn’t his fault. And sometimes, bad things just… happened. If his  _ father _ could still look at him with love, then… it didn’t matter what Jimmy thought. Or at least, he didn’t want to believe it did. 

The truth was that he’d never fully be able to forgive himself until he knew his twin had, too. In some ways, losing Jimmy had been even worse than losing his mother, because at least she hadn’t left him on purpose. 

Being able to talk freely with Jagger again after so long was a wonderful feeling, and at the end of the day, Cas said goodbye to his father and stopped to talk to the nurses on the way out. This one was a lot more accommodating than the last one, and told him that there was still a good chance that Jagger would be able to come home by Christmas. 

For the second time since arriving, Cas was having a hard time controlling his emotions. He thanked her profusely, then went home to tell Dean the good news. He hoped that maybe, just maybe, he’d find a way to make things right with Jimmy before Christmas. 

He had to.


	23. Stuck in the Middle (With You)

**Dean**

When Dean got home on Monday, Cas had the record player going and dinner nearly done. He looked happy, and Dean realized he’d never see that smile enough as long as he lived.

After a quick kiss, Cas made him run up to shower, and by the time he came back down, dinner was on the table. “Man... Could get used to this. How was your day, baby?” Before sitting, Dean pulled Cas into a proper hug and kiss.

“Class wasn’t bad. I find I dislike my main relationship psychology courses a lot less now.” Cas winked, taking a bite, and then gestured his fork toward Dean. “What about you? Did anyone notice that ridiculous mess we made?”

Dean huffed a laugh. “I couldn’t even look at that spot without getting hard. Matt was convinced someone broke in, but since nothing was missing he dropped his dumb quest pretty quick. Sam saw my neck and already knew.” Sam knew Dean did _something_ with _someone_ in that house, but he didn’t know it was Cas yet. It wasn’t a secret, but Dean just knew he couldn’t talk about it without turning into a damn girl about it all, so he kept his mouth shut. Cas was his, that was all that mattered.

Blue eyes flicked to the spot on the table directly covering Dean’s crotch, then Cas palmed his own. “I honestly think that was the best I’ve ever felt in my entire life, by the way. I wouldn’t be opposed to doing it again… several times.”

Dean grinned, “I was hoping you’d say that. I feel the exact same.” He reached for Cas’ hand and kissed it. “You’re perfect.”

“So perfect you want to go on another Pathokinesis date with me? I realize things have progressed between us, but… I’d still like to see the project through to the end, if you wouldn’t be opposed.” Cas looked nervous, as if there was a single chance Dean would say no. 

“Course I do. Those dates are actually pretty damn fun, and now I don’t gotta hold back at all.” Dean watched Cas smile as he grabbed the book and made his way back over, setting it between them.

He noted it was a double date that needed planning, so after confirming Jask and Ares’ availability for the coming Saturday, they scratched it off. Cas barked a laugh as he read what it said. “We need to dress up as 1940’s crooners… complete with music from the era, cigars that will likely give us lung cancer, and poker. Apparently, we’re supposed to pretend to be in the mob. I have a feeling you and Jaskier will end up being the ones on the date here…” he trailed off, screwing up his face. “Flirt with him and I'll end you.”

“Do I look crazy? I’m all yours, Cas. All yours.” Dean kissed his hand and then held out his arms for Cas to climb in his lap. “Gonna have an ol’ fashioned shake down eh, comare?” 

Cas straddled him willingly, running a hand through Dean’s hair. “Seriously? It was weird enough that you knew nineteenth century terms, now you know mafia slang, too?” 

“Nah. That’s actually all I know and I think it means mistress, so... not appropriate. But don’t worry, I’ll be on google all day memorizing them.” He grinned and leaned in for a kiss, which Cas met eagerly. 

He pulled back, shaking his head a little. “I actually kind of like it. I don’t know why, but I’ve loved every pet name you’ve ever given me... almost especially the feminine ones. And while mistress may not be accurate, it’s still... kind of hot.” Cas rolled his hips and tucked his tongue between his teeth, grinding down.

“That’s cause you’re so hot. I’m glad you like the nicknames, I can’t seem to stop myself anyway.” He chuckled and slid his hand in the back of Cas’ pants. “We need to have a real serious conversation though, Cas.” Dean bit back a grin at the worried look on Cas’ face.

“About what?”

“About the bed situation. You know you like mine more, let’s sleep in there tonight.” Dean nearly asked Cas to move into his room, but knew he shouldn’t yet.

Cas visibly relaxed and kissed him again, then whispered against his lips, “Deal.” 

~~~~

“Let’s go, sweetheart. We gotta meetin’ with the outfit in five minutes.” Dean spoke with a faux Italian accent and stood at the top of the stairs. He wore a suit, long grey peacoat and leather gloves, complete with a black fedora.

Cas came out in a puffy white dress shirt with black slacks and suspenders, with a bow tie resting on his shoulders instead of properly on. He eyed Dean and slid his hand up under his arm, then descended the stairs with him. 

“You look sexy as hell, Cas. We’re definitely fucking in these later.” Dean winked and opened the door to make their way to their friends’ house. 

Ares was excited about this date and went all out with decorations and old timey liquor. There was already music playing in the background, and Jask held out a box of cigars. “What’s buzzin’, cousin? Take off them stompers and come on in.”

The bitchface Cas gave him showed exactly how he felt about the slang, but then he actually joined in while grabbing a cigar and eyeing it. “This better be… killer- _diller.”_

Dean took a drink to block his laugh and walked over to get some food, watching Cas from across the kitchen. _God, he’s friggin adorable._

Cas and Ares were in a deep conversation about how nasty cigars were while Dean and Jask got theirs lit.

“You know we have to kiss them later, right?” Cas asked. “They’re both going to taste like ashtrays… and somehow, I still don’t think either of us will care.” He sighed as Ares agreed, and then poured himself a drink. 

Jask scoffed, tucking his thumb in the armhole of his suit vest. “You’re both too stuck on us to give a rat’s ass, and ya know it.” 

Ares rolled his eyes. “You know damn well you’re going to brush your teeth as soon as you're done.” He walked over and kissed his cheek.

Dean knew Cas would kiss him regardless, but he was happy he wasn’t far from home, his mouth already felt dry but he puffed on his cigar and walked into Cas’ space. “Kiss me.”

There was only a moment’s hesitation before Cas’ lips were on his, but he tried to keep it closed-mouthed. Dean wasn’t having any of it, he traced Cas’ lip with his tongue until he let out a needy sigh and finally let him in. 

Dean pulled back after a moment with a smirk. “You love me. Want me to go brush my teeth for you?”

“No, it’s alright.” Cas watched him fondly as Jask dragged out the poker chips and cards. “But, I will ask that you don’t beat me too badly… I don’t actually know how to play poker.”

Dean groaned and kissed his forehead. “You’re lucky you’re so damn adorable. Alright wise-guy, let’s do this. What’s the buy in?” He rubbed his hands together and sat down in a chair.

In the end, Jask won and Dean being out two-hundred dollars had him taking a double shot with a frown. “Fucking Tarzan over here cheats.” He knew damn well J didn’t cheat, but that didn’t lessen the sting in any way. 

Ares rolled his eyes and climbed in Jask’s lap. “My man never cheats.”

“With the way he’s always offering to have sex with _my_ man, I beg to differ.” Cas had had more to drink than any of them, and quickly copied Ares’ movements as he straddled Dean, looking him in the eyes. “I told you no, right? If I didn’t, I am now. No. He can’t have you.”

“Don’t want that fucker. Just you, sweetheart.” Dean kissed him, tasting the alcohol on his tongue. 

From what Dean could hear, they were also making out over there but he couldn’t see anything but Cas. His hands slid up Cas’ shirt, and Cas tugged on Dean’s hair as he ground down. 

“Oye!” Jask yelled. “Go home, if you two go any further here, we’re gonna wanna join.”

Dean huffed a laugh against Cas’ lips and pulled back. He met Cas’ eyes and knew what he wanted. “Yeah... we’re gonna have ta go home.”

They barely made it through the sliding glass door before Dean was laying Cas back onto the dining room table and kissing him deeply. Cas moaned, thrusting up into the air and trying to push Dean back. “No, bed. This table isn’t strong enough… we…” he pulled him back in and tugged up until the table really was groaning under the weight of them both. 

“Cas! Fuck!” Dean couldn’t get enough of Cas, there was no way they were going to make it upstairs but maybe they could get it together enough to get their dicks out of their slacks. He reached down, trying to undo Cas’ pants with one hand while sucking on his neck.

“Shit, I need you so bad.” Cas helped free them both and scrambled to pull their cocks together, raising his hips off the wooden table to slide his length against Dean’s with a desperate gasp. “Please, I don’t care if the table breaks. Don't stop, we’ll get a — _ah_ — another one.”

“Fucking good. Keep your hand there baby.” Dean started thrusting against Cas’ cock, moaning at how amazing his hand felt.

They picked up speed, rutting against each other until they were both coming with loud, intense groans, and the table split clean in two. Dean landed hard on top of Cas, who let out a pained grunt. “De—” 

“Shit! You okay, sweetheart?” _Fuck, I killed him._ Dean lifted his weight off and checked him for injuries.

Cas huffed a laugh and nodded, carefully getting up. “Yes. I imagine I’ll be sore tomorrow, but… it was incredibly worth it.” He looked at the broken table and sighed. “Something tells me if this keeps up, we won’t be getting our deposit back.”

**Castiel**

“The last — and arguably most important piece of Sternberg’s triangle — is commitment. Now, some of you might be sitting there thinking this will be easy. That commitment means marriage, or not engaging with outside individuals. You’re wrong.”

Cas rolled his eyes, but prepared to take notes anyway. _There are nicer ways to go about it than flat out telling us what we believe and then saying we’re wrong._

“Commitment can mean a variety of things, but the most important thing to discern is if it means the same thing to you and your partner… or partners. To some, commitment really does involve a white picket fence, wedding bands, and sharing only in each other until death do you part.” Professor Ketch glanced around the room like he himself found that appalling. “For others, it could be a mutual agreement not to sleep around, with no intention of ever getting married to the other.”

_Will Dean and I get married? Does he want to? I always got the feeling marriage wasn’t for him… but neither was love in general, and here we are._ Cas jotted down some notes and let his mind wander. _Would he propose? Would I? How would I do it?_ He accidentally let out a very real chuckle as the words ‘proposal pie’ popped into his head. 

“Sorry, Mr. Novak. Was something I said humorous?” 

Cas’ eyes shot up to Ketch’s in embarrassment. “No, no… Sorry. I was… Nevermind.” 

An almost predatory grin crept across his professor’s face. “No, please. Continue. Who knows, it might open up an interesting line of inquiry with the rest of the class. I’m assuming it was related to the subject at hand, and not some… _other_ type of daydream?” 

_Gross. Seriously._ Cas cleared his throat and straightened up in his seat, hoping to appear a little more professional. “I recently entered a relationship with someone I’ve known for a very long time. I was simply wondering _if_ we were to get married, which one of us would be popping the question… and how. I’m sorry, I suppose that wasn’t entirely on topic.” 

“Have you spoken to each other about your individual definitions of commitment?” 

_No._ “We’ve talked about a great many things, but… no, I suppose we haven’t. I believe with all of me that we have the same viewpoints on it, though, and I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before we clarify that. I don’t think we even _need_ to clarify that.” The thought of Cas seeking intimacy or passion elsewhere was laughable to him, but he managed to keep a straight face. 

Ketch nodded almost sarcastically, which seemed a little _un_ professional. “Right. So, you’re quite sure then, that his definition of commitment isn’t simply being honest about other partners, and _not_ sexual exclusivity?” 

“I’d be willing to bet a great deal on it, yes.” Cas nodded, thinking of how it was Dean’s idea in the first place to swear off all other lovers when they began the project, and that was before they were in an actual relationship with each other. 

“So, it’s safe to say he’s never given you a reason to believe he’d be open to something else, then. No… friends he’s a little too chummy with? Strangers he looks a little too closely at?” 

Cas had been in his classes long enough to know that this was just what Ketch did. He’d attack something from every angle until he found a crack in logic, a faltering point in belief. He’d claimed at the start of their very first lesson that it was because if one’s beliefs couldn’t stand up to scrutiny, they were little more than hopes. Cas opened his mouth to rebut, but visions of Jask and Ares started swimming through his mind. _How many times have they offered? And every time, Dean seems to get a little closer to saying yes. I’ve seen the way he looks at Jaskier… and Ares. The slightly more exotic version of me._

“Well?”

_No. I won’t start doubting Dean because my professor decided to climb up on his polyamorous soap box._ “There is nothing wrong with polyamory, Professor. It’s just simply not something that Dean and I partake in. People can be polyamorous and lead very happy, fulfilling lives with incredible relationships… but so can those who choose to remain monogamous. And not everyone with a flirty personality is polyam, so… Yes. I can say with certainty that Dean’s definition of commitment aligns with my own. We are committed to each other, and no one else. There is no one else.” 

Ketch nodded with a glint in his eye that set Cas’ teeth on edge, but his professor moved on to other topics and finally left him alone. 

_Now… I just hope that I’m actually correct._

~~~~

That class bothered him right up until they finished eating dinner and were curled up on the couch together, watching a movie. Cas had been quiet most of the evening, and while he could tell that Dean knew something wasn’t right, Dean hadn’t pressed — and Cas was beyond grateful for it. But, he knew he needed to speak up before the fears borne of that class ate him alive. “Dean… can we talk about something? It’s not bad, I promise… it’s just something that was said in one of my classes today.” 

Dean grabbed the remote and hit pause. “Of course.” He ran his palm up and down Cas’ back. “I had a feelin’ somethin’ was comin’ but figured you’d talk when you were ready. What’s up?”

“What does commitment mean to you? As in… exclusivity between two people, or simply being honest about other partners?” Cas kept himself tucked against Dean’s chest so he didn’t have to look at him, not sure if he could handle whatever was on Dean’s face. 

“Uh...” He paused, making Cas slightly nervous as he contemplated his answer. “I think that depends on the couple honestly, but if you mean us… I think it means exclusive, but also more than that. Committing is also being dedicated to them right? Like, being there for them and puttin’ them first?”

Cas nodded, feeling the soft fabric of Dean’s shirt under his cheek. “Yes. We were talking about monogamy and polyamory, and the ways commitment factors in with each. Ketch actually asked me how sure I was that you and I were on the same page, do you believe it?” 

“Dude’s an ass, why would he single you out about it?”

He blushed, happy it was hidden. “I… might have been daydreaming a little bit, and laughed. Out loud. It’s not really his fault, I would’ve singled me out, too.”

Dean chuckled and kissed his head. “Well, I’m all here Cas. I dunno about marriage and stuff yet, but if that is something you’ve always wanted, I will definitely _start_ thinkin’ about it.”

The rational part of Castiel’s brain knew it was way too soon to be concerned with marriage, and the fact that Dean was open to considering it at all was good enough for now. He shifted, straddling Dean and kissing him gently. “I love you, Dean. I don’t need anything more than that right now.”

“I feel the same. Long as I always have you.” Dean pulled him in for another kiss, smiling slightly against his lips.

“Do you want me right now?” Cas leaned down to kiss Dean’s neck teasingly, taking the way Dean shifted his hips under him as a yes. “Good, then sit still. And no… you don’t get to return this one until later. This is me, putting you first in a way we both find incredibly satisfying.”

Dean nodded with his bottom lip between his teeth. “Y—yeah, okay, sweetheart.”

Slowly, Cas mouthed over Dean’s clothes and shimmied down until he was on his own knees with Dean’s bracketing him. He kept his eyes locked to those gorgeous greens as he palmed Dean’s crotch, waking him up. “Did you ever fantasize about me before this all started? It’s okay if you didn’t.”

Dean huffed a nervous laugh and nodded. “Uh... yeah actually. This exact position... a lot of times. Did you?”

“Occasionally, although I tried not to. I thought it was rude, but… even before this, I knew you were the most gorgeous human being I’d ever see.” He bent over, licking Dean’s sweatpants right above the bulge. “What was I doing? Describe it to me.”

“Wait... did you picture anything after you saw my dick that one day?”

He didn’t have the luxury of hiding his blush that time. He nodded, licking his bottom lip slowly. “Yes, I did. After what I assume was a pang of jealousy toward the girl in your bed, I nearly tripped over my own feet trying to get to the bathroom. It was… still shiny. I… came all over the back of the toilet thinking about you buried inside of me and not someone else.”

Dean rutted into the air, his crotch brushing Cas’ chin. “Fuck... sorry about that.” He ran his hand through Cas’ hair and sighed. “I used to imagine you pushing me back on the couch and fucking taking it. Tellin’ me I don’t even know what a blowjob really was — ”

“You didn’t really know,” Cas cut him off, tugging down Dean’s sweats to set him free. 

“And then showin’ me. I didn’t even imagine facefucking you all the time, it was mostly you takin’ what you want and swallowing my come like it’s your last... fucking meal on Earth.”

“Mmm.” Cas splayed one of his palms over Dean’s chest and pinned him down, using his other to play with Dean’s balls. “Well, I’m _going_ to take what I want from you. And I don’t know about last meal on Earth, but… I’m absolutely going to swallow your come.” He lapped at the head of Dean’s cock until precome dripped out, then sucked him in slowly. He tasted incredible, all earthy and _man,_ and pretty soon… it might as well have been Cas’ last meal. Every time Dean tried to move or buck up, Cas pinned him down and sucked harder, faster, moving his tongue and bobbing his head as his free hand twisted over the shaft. 

Dean’s entire body was shaking under him, fighting off that free fall just a little longer until he couldn’t take it anymore. “Ahh... fuuck!” He groaned so loud Cas was sure the neighbors heard as he emptied inside of Cas’ tight throat.

“So,” Cas said between heavy breaths. “Was that better or worse than your fantasy?” 

“Better. You’re always better than anything... ever.” He tugged on Cas’ hair, bringing him up for a kiss.

Cas met his lips with a sated smile, beginning to think that Dean was right, and that what they had was better than any fantasy. 


	24. Our Little World

**Dean**

Things with Cas were going better than he ever could have imagined. They were still completely obsessed with one another, but he truly hoped that would never fade. During the week they went on another date for the project. It was a simple; ‘pick out your favorite childhood book and read together’ type deal, but Dean thinks he should have gotten extra credit for acting out Max in ‘Where The Wild Things Are’. Cas’ favorite book turned out to be some holographic number called ‘Ghost Train’, which didn’t seem all that appropriate for kids but sure explained a lot about him as a person. 

Part of the date was buying the books for future generations, and Cas tried to skip out on that part but Dean insisted. Maybe it will just sit on their shelf but maybe one day they _would_ have someone to pass them onto, who knew.

When Thursday came, Cas scratched off another date and they had to be blindfolded again, this time trying foods and guessing what they were. Dean went into it confidently and when he sat in the chair with his eyes covered, he couldn’t wait to see what Cas was going to feed him. “You gonna feed me or just stare at me?” He grinned, knowing Cas was standing over him.

“Honestly… looking at you blindfolded is making it a little hard to think.” Cas held something to his lips, and Dean extended his neck to actually bite it. It was round, small, and tough to break off… but friggin delicious. 

“Uhh, meat...” he chewed more, “jerky. It’s jerky... peppered Slim Jim.”

“Excellent. Okay, try again.” A moment later, something chocolatey with bumps on it plopped onto his tongue. 

Dean chewed and thought about it for a while. “Um... can I have some more?”

“No.” And yet, another one landed in his mouth, anyway. Cas never could deny him.

“Mmm... uh... well chocolate... is it a certain candy?” He couldn’t figure it out.

“Sno Caps.” Cas chuckled quietly and shuffled, grabbing the last mystery item. He could tell what this one was right away: it was one of those abomination dollar pies. 

“Ugh.” Dean spat it out like a baby and frowned. “I need real pie! My taste buds are angry, Cas.”

The second he finished that sentence, an explosion of flavor hit his tongue. It was one of Cas’ cherry pies, the really damn good ones. Dean moaned, opening his mouth for more. “Mmm, I wuv you,” he mumbled with his mouth full.

“I know you do.” Cas fed him again and then straddled his lap, kissing him slowly as he took the blindfold off. “I really do make good pie.”

Dean blinked as he adjusted to the light. “You do. The best. It’s my turn now.” He rutted up into Cas’ ass and nipped his lip.

A soft gasp later, Cas wiggled off Dean’s lap and put the blindfold on himself. “Please don’t put anything gross in my mouth. Please.”

“I was going to just slide my dick in, but okay,” Dean joked as he opened a plastic package. He held out the Hostess snack and slid it across Cas’ bottom lip. “Open up, handsome.”

Cas dropped his jaw slightly and jerked his head back a little as Dean maneuvered the thing between his teeth. “Mmm, oatmeal creme pie?”

“You’re good.” Dean tossed it aside and then pulled out something he’d grabbed on the way home. “Open wide, sweetheart. This one is big.”

“I thought you were kidding about feeding me your cock?” Cas opened anyway, sticking his tongue out to try and lick it before it actually passed his lips. He bit down, making a face and chewing slowly. “That’s appalling.”

“No way. It’s fucking life.” Dean took a huge bite. _Not that bad actually, but also... not that great._ “C’mon baby, gotta guess... what’s it taste like?”

“It tastes like diabetes, Dean. It’s sugar, but… meaty. I have no idea.” 

“The friggin Elvis. It’s two glazed donuts and a hamburger patty.” Dean set it aside and leaned in to lick some glaze from Cas’ lip. “Alright, last thing. Open.”

Reluctantly, Cas leaned forward to take it in. His lips immediately closed around it and he hummed, sucking while trying to stifle a laugh. He swirled his tongue around the edges and pulled off, hollowing out his cheeks. “It’s a blueberry cock sucker.”

“Maybe... keep suckin’ baby.” Dean watched Cas with his bottom lip between his teeth. His cock was already twitching in his pants as Cas moaned and took the whole damn thing in his mouth, his lips closing around the stick. 

He tilted his head and leaned back to slide off, sliding his tongue out of his mouth to trail up the side and lap at the tip. As if that wasn’t enough… he wiggled forward and dropped to his knees, clasping his hands behind his back. 

_Fuck... Am I jealous of a candy right now? Yes... Yes, I am._ “Goddammit, baby... You win.” Dean kept the sucker there and took out his cock, slowly stroking it while watching Cas suck the blueberry cock.

Cas bobbed his head and sucked messily, blue colored saliva dripping down to Dean’s fingers as he started thrusting the thing further into Cas’ throat. He dropped his jaw and opened wide, and when the sucker hit the back of his throat, Cas gagged but didn’t flinch. 

“Fuck... takin’ this sucker like it’s my dick. You like it, sweetheart? Does it feel good in that perfect little throat?” Dean began full on jacking off, unable to fight it any longer. “You’re so goddamn hot, Cas.”

“Mmmm.” Cas bobbed his head, letting the candy balls stretch out his cheeks with every pass. Dean could see Cas was equally as hard, but wasn’t making a single damn move to touch himself… he wanted to put on a show. 

“Cas!” Dean took a step closer just as he released with a grunt. His come landed on Cas’ lips and dripped down onto the sucker just before Cas took it back in again, sucking every drop of Dean’s spend off of it. Dean tossed the treat aside and slid his heavy sensitive cock inside Cas’ mouth, needing to feel that magical tongue.

Carefully, Cas cleaned off every drop like that was what he’d wanted all along. Dean took a step back and leaned on the table to catch his breath. “Jesus, Cas... you’re... fucking amazing.” He pulled off the blindfold and dropped before him, sliding his tongue inside Cas’ mouth, chasing the flavor of blueberries and come.

“Dean,” Cas gasped, leaning back and reaching down to feverishly palm himself. “Please,” he moaned, pushing his sweatpants down and gripping himself before pulling Dean back into a filthy, sloppy kiss. 

“Let me.” Dean stood and practically lifted Cas off the ground, setting him back on that chair and dropping to his knees. He could see Cas was desperate for release, so he didn’t tease, he instantly slid Cas inside his mouth.

Desperate was an understatement, he was coming apart within seconds, jerking his hips off the chair and grasping at Dean’s hair. “Fuck, oh my gods… _Dean…_ don’t s—” He let go with a loud, broken cry, coming so much that Dean actually had a problem swallowing it all. 

Some dripped from the corners of Dean’s mouth and when he pulled off, he stared up at Cas while licking it up.

“How are you real?” Cas’ voice was fucked, and he dropped down to Dean’s level as he kissed him hard, tackling him fully to the ground. 

They fell ungracefully, but they both huffed a laugh and continued to kiss. “You know, I ask myself the same thing about you every single day.”

~~~~

Saturday morning, Dean woke up while Cas was already brushing his teeth and washing his face. He felt overly groggy and considered staying in bed all day. 

They had a date later, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t be lazy for a few hours. He grabbed his ‘breakfast in bed’ currency and set it on Cas’ pillow, then tucked his head under his own.

A couple of minutes later, Cas chuckled. “Okay. Stay here.” He left, returning a while later with a tray full of food. “Come on, sit up, I don’t want to spill the juice.”

Dean grunted and slid the pillow off his face. He had just dozed off again and peeked one eye open. “Mmm, thanks.” He sat up and leaned against the headboard. Normally he hated talking in the mornings, but he remembered Cas loved it. “Sit with me, darlin’.”

Cas climbed back into bed and kissed Dean’s shoulder, then picked up a piece of bacon and hand-fed it to him. “You really should talk more in the mornings. Particularly to me. Actually… Only to me.” 

“Mmhm.” Dean chewed and hummed with his eyes closed, then opened his mouth for more. “Love when you put meat in my mouth.”

He continued feeding Dean, snorting a laugh at his joke. “Eggs are next, you need something other than bacon. But here, finish this one first.” Cas fed him the rest of that piece and then held the fork to his mouth. 

“Could get used to this.” Dean ate happily, staring at Cas with a mix of awe and appreciation. “You’re the only person that’s ever fed me... literally fed me.”

Cas stayed silent for a few bites and then nodded slightly, setting the fork down. “You’ve been my ‘first’ with a lot of things too, you know. I’ve… definitely been a little braver with you, and I’m not just talking about singing Taylor Swift songs and posting viral bad lip reading videos.”

Dean grinned. “We haven’t been embarrassed in a while, huh? Guess that book had mercy on us.”

“I think you’re right. And how fortuitous, since we’ve _also_ decided to have mercy on ourselves. I don’t know how much longer I’d have survived it otherwise.”

“You would have finished. You’re the most dedicated person I know, sweetheart.” Dean interlocked their fingers and laid his head back, still watching Cas with a lovestruck expression the way he always did. _I dunno how I got him, but I sure as hell hope I never lose him._

**Castiel**

The most recent date they scratched off basically entailed pretending to be foreign tourists, heading to three different restaurants and picking fake names for themselves. At the first, they were Mikhail and Dmitri, speaking in thick, Russian accents. It helped that he actually spoke Russian, and fluently, so pretending wasn’t as hard or embarrassing as he feared it would be. They stuck with appetizers there and moved on to another restaurant for the main course. Here, they adopted different personas. Dean became Jensen, a cowboy-loving Texan with a southern drawl hot enough that Cas nearly dropped to his knees right then. Cas, on the other hand, had chosen a German accent but couldn’t come up with a good name in time, so he called himself Steve. Dean laughed so hard at that they barely made it through. 

Dessert found them at yet another small restaurant, where Dean brought out his most stereotypical British accent and spent the time mocking Cas’ professor. It was irritatingly endearing, and by this point, Cas was feeling both confident _and_ ridiculous. He tried to convince the waitress his name was legally King Tut, complete with a likely offensive Egyptian accent. 

Putting up the myriad of mummy and incest jokes from Dean was _not_ worth it, but it _did_ give him the motivation to cash in one of his currencies when they got home. “This one.” He fished it out of his wallet and smacked it on the table. “You blow me with your hands tied behind your back.”

“Thought you’d never ask.” Dean clicked his tongue and pulled off his clothes, instantly dropping to his knees. “Bind me, baby.” He glanced up through his eyelashes and Cas shuddered as he got up to grab some rope from his bedroom. 

He made his way back down the stairs slowly, thickening in his pajama pants when he saw Dean was still on his knees, head bowed, hands clasped behind his back. Cas sucked in a labored breath. “You look so good like this.” He dropped down and bound him gently but firmly, kissing the back of his neck. 

“Then I should wait for you like this more often.” Dean didn’t lift his head as he spoke, but Cas could see the small shiver that traveled up his spine when he kissed him again.

Cas moved in front of him, admiring every inch of Dean’s body. “I’m going to enjoy this greatly, I think.” He ran his hands softly through Dean’s hair, loving the feel of the strands as he closed his fingers and tilted Dean’s head from side to side, appreciating him from every angle. “I’ll never understand how the gods managed to craft someone so perfect.”

Dean blushed and huffed a small laugh as though he didn’t see what Cas saw, but also wasn’t about to argue. He slowly licked his lips and watched Cas devour him with his eyes, seconds before Cas slid his pants down and ran the tip of his cock over Dean’s lips. 

“Open for me, baby.” The moment Dean complied, Cas slowly moved forward until he could feel the heat of Dean’s mouth over most of his length. “I’m suddenly upset I’m not the one that drew cockwarming, though… I’m very excited to do that for you, so I suppose I can’t complain.”

Dean chuckled and closed his lips to suck, relaxing his throat so Cas can push in further. He did, biting his lip, but then stilled as he bottomed out. The point of that currency was to see what Dean could do with just that mouth alone, and Cas was extremely eager to find out. 

Humming, Dean slid his tongue around the underside of Cas’ cock while staring up at him with lust blown eyes. He bobbed slightly, then nuzzled his nose along Cas’ pelvis. 

It felt incredible, but the sight was almost even better. Dean looked like a vision on his knees with his cheeks hollowed out around him — around _him,_ not someone else, not some stranger that got to have something Cas desperately wanted. Dean was _his._

With a shudder, Cas dug his nails into Dean’s shoulder and stayed still, groaning each time Dean’s lips caught under the head of his cock. Dean slid him in and out, groaning and drooling down his chin with his own cock fully hard in his lap. He never pulled off, not even to catch a breath, and Cas couldn’t take it a moment longer. 

“Oh, Dean,” his voice came out in a whisper as he came, steadier than expected, a slow drop off a steep cliff. 

Dean swallowed with a groan and his eyes fluttered shut when Cas slowly began to pull out. “M’so fucking hard, Cas.” His voice was completely wrecked from the blowjob and his glistening, swollen lips parted into a weak smile.

Cas tilted his head, then helped Dean to his feet and led him to the couch. Cas sat, pulling him into his lap and reaching around to hold his hands, keeping him steady. His other hand flattened out, caging Dean’s cock between it and his thigh. “So move, Dean. Show me.” 

“Sh—shit.” Dean began thrusting against his thigh and Cas’ gorgeous hand. He was breathless in seconds, still completely wound from Cas’ cock in his throat.

_As if he needed to get any more beautiful._ Cas watched in awe, rubbing his thumb over Dean’s tip and doing his best to hold him upright. “You’re incredible, Dean. I’ve never seen anyone like you.”

“Ah, fu—” Dean whimpered as he came, staring down as Cas’ fingers were dripping wet with his spend. His body shuddered before he collapsed onto Cas and licked into his mouth.

Cas reached around to untie him quickly and kissed him until they both felt that serrated edge of need smooth out. “You’re amazing, Dean. Truly.” He pulled one of Dean’s hands to his lips and kissed over the slight rope burns he found there, and then did the same to the other. “We should treat these. It’s not terrible, but… still. I don’t like knowing something we did might’ve hurt you.”

“M’fine, sweetheart.” Dean glanced down at his wrists. “I couldn’t stay still.”

“So, we’ll go with something softer than rope next time. We should’ve worked up to something like that anyway.” Cas rested his lips against Dean’s shoulder for a long moment, and then lightly tapped him. “Come on. Let’s go get you cleaned up.”

~~~~

_This is absolutely the dumbest thing I’ve ever done in my life._ Cas held the wriggling, squirming dog in his arms and took a deep breath, opening the door and stepping inside. He’d watched Dean with Chaos enough times to know that Dean desperately wanted a little fat dog of his own, and after a couple of weeks of interviews, tests, vaccines and the like, Cas was finally bringing Chaos’ brother home. 

He’d purchased a small dog bed, knowing full well that the thing would never use it if his sister was any indication. Chaos probably didn’t know hers existed; from what Cas understood, she slept with Jask or on the couch. “Stop... _squirming.”_

Dean wouldn’t be home for another hour, so Cas used the time to try and get the chubby little guy acquainted with the townhouse, and then cooked dinner. He had it on the table as usual when Dean stepped through the door, and a smile spread across his face at the completely confused look on Dean’s. 

Cas nearly tripped over the bulldog puppy trying to get to his boyfriend, but after a quick kiss, Cas moved out of the way. “Dean? I’d like you to meet Havoc.”

“No friggin way!” Dean dropped down, trying to pick up the wiggling puppy and nearly failing. “H—hi — woah, calm down, baby boy.”

The smile on Cas’ face could’ve lit up a city as he watched Dean, now sure he’d made the right call. “He’s yours. Well, ours.” Havoc licked all over Dean’s face then snuggled against his neck, and Cas forced himself to turn around — it was too cute to even watch. 

“Cas...” Dean stared up at him in awe. “Thank you. I...” Havoc whimpered, causing Dean to chuckle and kiss his head. “M’sure I’ll love you, too. Just don’t poop on the couch.”

“I think we both know you’re going to love him, anyway. You better… I still can’t believe I thought this was a good idea.” He smiled, hoping Dean would realize he was only teasing. “Do you want to reunite him with Chaos, or should we wait?”

“Yeah, but maybe this weekend? I wanna bond with him first.” Dean sniffed him and grinned. “He smells like puppy.”

Cas nodded, moving over to sit next to Dean on the couch. Havoc spent about eight seconds climbing into Cas’ lap to check out the newcomer, but hopped right back to Dean’s after realizing he already knew who it was. “Does this mean I have to fight for your attention now?”

“What you think, Havy? Can Daddy Cas have some lovin’, too?” Dean leaned over to kiss Cas just as Havoc jumped to try and kiss too, falling over in the process. “Think that answers that.” Dean gave Havoc kisses and then went back to kiss Cas again, and Cas was prepared to put the wrinkly thing in a cage if he dared stop them again. 

He shifted, climbing into Dean’s lap and sighing against his mouth, perfectly content to stay right there for the rest of his life. Havoc eventually gave up trying to separate them and curled into a ball next to their legs, which satisfied Cas for the moment. _This is it. This is what happiness feels like. The love of my life, and a fat little dog. What could be better?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some much needed fluff after last nights episode.


	25. Sex and Violence

**Dean**

During the week, they scratched off another fairly easy at-home date that had them making a box to hold little mementos from all their past dates. Dean felt like this should have been done in the beginning, but Cas had everything fairly organized, so it worked out. 

They put in ticket stubs from the movies, receipts from dinners, an unsmoked cigar from their ridiculous game night. Cas even threw in Havoc’s adoption paperwork since without the dates, they might not have him.

He turned out to be a little asshole in the best of ways. He kept his promise not to shit on the couch, but that was about it. They were both terrified of the steps each morning, not sure if they’d find a steamy present — again — and yet, they still didn’t regret him. He was annoying at times and constantly tried to sleep in between them, but they loved him already. 

When Friday came, they decided to put off date night for Saturday and let Jask and Ares know they’d be over with a surprise. They had no idea that Havoc was there, and also had no idea they’d be babysitting on date nights, but they’d be finding out soon enough. 

Dean took a quick shower and then came down to eat dinner before heading over to most likely get drunk, but Dean noticed Cas had already eaten. “I’m sorry. I was starving today.” He blushed slightly, and Dean could tell he felt bad.

“Don’t worry about it, you don’t have to wait for me, sweetheart. Ever.” Dean got an idea right then and grinned. “Be right back.”

He took the stairs two at a time and grabbed one of his currencies. By the time he was entering the kitchen again, he was already slowly chubbing in his jeans. Dean popped the paper at Cas and handed it over. “I cash in one cockwarming sesh while I eat.”

From the look on Cas’ face, he made the right decision. He nodded quickly, staring at the paper. “Do you want me clothed or naked?”

“Fuck... Naked. Me clothed with just my fly open.” Dean opened up his pants and sat down to watch Cas strip, and Cas put on a little bit of a show for him. It wasn’t overly graceful, but it was  _ Cas,  _ and that counted for a hell of a lot. 

They turned the chair sideways so Dean could eat with one hand while being able to fully see Cas, and also because they both seriously doubted Cas’ entire body would fit under the small table they’d gotten to replace the one they broke. He settled on his knees, pupils blown already, cock becoming more alert by the second. 

“You told Jask and Ares we’re going there, right? Not the other way around? The door isn’t locked.” Cas flicked his eyes to the sliding glass door not five feet from them, then opened his mouth and slid his tongue out like he didn’t care if they were caught or not. 

Dean hissed when he felt Cas’ tongue and had to focus on his words. “Uh... yeah... no, we’re going there. Fuck them.” He forced himself to take a bite, hardly even tasting the food as his eyes locked onto Cas.

Cas scooted forward on his knees, placing his palms face up on his bare thighs as he closed his mouth around Dean’s cock, letting his eyes flutter partly closed but holding contact. He looked like he was made for it, like he  _ lived  _ for it. 

“Fuck, you’re so beautiful.” Dean began to eat faster, Cas looked so damn good he barely believed his own eyes. He didn’t move, but his cheeks flushed and he seemed to sink a little further into himself, like he was relaxing into it. His tongue shifted just slightly and a dribble of saliva slipped down his chin, but he made no move to do a damned thing about it. 

When Dean finished eating, he pushed the plate away and sat back, running his fingers through Cas’ hair. “Stay still, baby...” he started to move, sliding himself inside and out slowly at first but he couldn’t hold back any longer. Soon, he was fucking into Cas’ throat, chasing his release and when it finally came, he moaned Cas’ name and gripped his hair to hold him in place. 

Cas swallowed like the champ he was and offered Dean a dopey grin. He was hard in his lap, making Dean feel guilty for what he was about to do. “Thank you, sweetheart. Gotta get dressed now, we’re late.”

“Wh—” Cas cut himself off with a small whimper, looking at the pool of precome coating his thigh. It took him a moment, but he stood up on shaky legs and nodded, stopping his hand in the air midway to his cock. He balled it into a fist and nodded once. “Of course, Dean.” 

He left the room, heading up the stairs and returning a few minutes later, completely dressed. Cas offered him a mischievous grin and bent over to pick up the pile of clothes he’d shed, revealing a brilliantly blue, lacy thong. 

"Cas... shit." Dean reached out, sliding his hand inside Cas' jeans without hesitation. He growled and gripped Cas' ass, pulling him in for a kiss. "So you wanna play tonight, huh? I'm game."

“I prepped for you, Dean. Before you even came home. That whole time I was cockwarming? My ass was stuffed full, begging for you.” Cas leaned in to nip at his neck. “Come on, get Havoc’s leash. You’re right… we’re late.” He trailed his fingers across Dean’s cheek then turned and headed for the door, dripping in confidence. 

"Wait..." Dean's heavy cock twitched so hard it was nearly painful, he gripped Cas' waistband tightly and then released him with a growl. "Alright, let's go."

They walked over, stealing looks at each other, and before Dean even knocked, he leaned in to kiss Cas again, backing him against the sliding door while Havoc jumped on his leg.  _ Why did I even start a teasing game I couldn't handle?! _

Cas rutted almost desperately against him, then abruptly pulled back as footsteps approached. He straightened his clothes as Jask opened the door, his face lighting up at the sight of Havoc. “Fuck! You got him! Guys, that’s awesome!”

"Yup, Havoc wants to see his sister." Havoc ran inside past Jask, and Dean let go of his leash so he could greet his sister. They circled each other, smelling butts like dogs do, but within seconds they were jumping and wiggling their fat little bodies in excitement. Dean lost count of how many times they fell ungracefully, but all four men were watching with smiles.

Ares finally chuckled and spoke up. “Do you guys realize how gay this makes us all? We even have the same dog. Pretty soon this cul-de-sac will have gay-slash-bulldog requirements."

Frowning deeply, Cas turned to Ares. “Why would this cul-de-sac develop a bestiality policy?”

"Gross, that's not what I meant." Ares eyed him and tilted his head slightly. “You need a drink, don't you? Come on." He turned towards the kitchen without waiting to see if Cas was following. 

Dean shrugged at Cas and kneeled down to pet the crazy pups, making sounds at them that he should be embarrassed of making, but he figured they all knew he'd kill them if they repeated it to anyone.

Once those two were out of sight, Jask kneeled next to him with a smirk and a soft chuckle. “What the hell did you do to that poor guy? He looks like he’s wound tighter than a two dollar watch.”

"Uh... kinda wound him up a bit before we got here. I got to come, but he didn't... kinda regret it now. He’s a little scary, huh?" Dean faked a shiver and sat down on his ass. "It's also hot, though... I don't know if he's gonna throat punch me for a bad joke or jump my bones right here on the floor. Kinda fun."

Jask snorted quietly. “If you two are gonna fuck, at least have the decency to go upstairs to the spare room. Don't defile the bathroom down here, people use it.” 

"You're no fun. Don't act like you two never fucked in our bathroom. What kinda host dishes out hook-up rules to their guests? Pssh, wait until I tell your mom what a shit host she raised." Dean teased, and Jask tackled him straight to the ground. 

The dogs started going crazy trying to jump in, which only brought Ares and Cas back into the room. “Seriously?”

Dean had him pinned, but the fucker was seconds from getting loose.  _ C'mon... tap, bitch. _

He vaguely heard Ares call out something about 'not breaking anything' but he couldn't hear whatever threat came with it, because Jask had broken free from his grip and wrapped his legs around Dean’s waist to flip him over. Jask winced from the way his ankle twisted weirdly, but he pumped his fists in the air with some annoying victory chant — right when Dean noticed Cas looking disappointed. 

_ Ah, hell no!  _ Dean bucked his hips and wrapped his legs around J's middle, pulling him backwards while rolling onto his side, locking him into a perfect kneebar. "Tap, J... your man is watching."

“Fuck!” Jask slammed his palm on the carpet and twisted to try and loosen the stress, but it just made it worse. “Christ on a cracker, D! When the fuck did you get so strong?!”

The needy little noise Cas let out was audible over even the dogs barking, and Dean chuckled, still hanging on. Just seeing the effect this had on Cas had him wanting to release J, just to pick Cas up and fuck him against their counter… but understanding how inappropriate that would be, Dean pushed those thoughts away. “Always been strong, buddy. Your job consists of standing there tryin’ to look pretty while mine is real labor.” He glanced up at Cas again. “When’s the last time you got those soft hands dirty, J? I get mine  _ filthy _ every single day, cupcake.”

Ares sidestepped away from Cas, who was actually holding onto the wall for support. Jask seemed to pick up on it, too, cause the moment he quit legitimately struggling in favor of playing along was clear as day to Dean. “Yeah? I can feel how rough they are. Little lotion wouldn’t kill ya, D.”

Dean huffed a laugh and released him. “My wife ain’t complainin’.” He walked over to Cas with his hair tousled and cheeks flushed, pulling him in for a kiss. “Sorry, I think he was gettin’ off on that.”

From the way Cas grasped at him and immediately opened, it was pretty damn clear  _ he’d  _ been about to get off on it, too. “Dean,” he whispered. “I need you. Now.”

Dean could never deny that. He pulled back and gripped Cas’ arm. “Be back. Watch our son and shut up about it.” He tugged him up the stairs, into their guest bedroom, slammed the door behind him and caged him in. “You need me, sweetheart? M’right here.”

Cas’ hands fumbled with Dean’s jeans as he hurried to bite his neck, sucking messily on the skin just under his jaw. “Always need you.”

Dean grabbed his hands and pinned them above his head with a growl. “Good.” He bit Cas’ jaw and released his hands, tugging down both of their jeans quickly and rutting against him. “Fuck, these panties... Cas.” Both of them were hard and Dean couldn’t fight another low, commanding growl. 

He took a step back and pulled off Cas’ jeans completely then picked him up to wrap his legs around him.

_ “Fuck,” _ Cas whispered against his neck. “Rip them off me. I have others… Fuck.  _ Please.”  _ He rutted against Dean’s stomach so hard it nearly threw him off balance, but he stayed upright long enough to get him to the bathroom counter. Instantly, Dean was pulling at them, but stopped himself.

“Not yet...” he bit Cas’ neck and sucked a bruise while rutting into him. After an agonizing amount of time, he backed away and pulled the panties to the side, ignoring the fabric’s protest as he gripped the plug, moving it around roughly. “This ass is mine.”

**Castiel**

_ Mother of all seven fucking hells, I’m going to die here.  _ Cas was gasping for air; so turned on he couldn’t see straight. He could feel Dean shifting the plug inside him, shoving it deeper, pulling it back until his ass was stretching to try and let it out… just to jam it back in again. 

He gripped the counter hard with one hand and Dean’s shoulder with the other, his head tipped back against the glass mirror. “Please, Dean…” 

He finally showed mercy and pulled the plug from his taut body. Dean began stroking his cock, staring down at Cas’ abused hole with his bottom lip between his teeth. 

After trying to slide in with the panties intact, he released a frustrated growl and ripped them out of the way. The force with which his cock sprang free was  _ absolutely _ this side of painful, and Cas reached down to grip it before he even realized what was happening. 

Dean lined up, smearing the excess lube around before sliding inside without pause. He bottomed out in seconds, staring into Cas’ eyes as he began snapping his hips.

The movements had Cas’ back pressing into the water faucet, but he didn’t care. He needed this so damn badly he’d take all the bruises in the world if it meant Dean would keep fucking him like that. He clenched, gasping out Dean’s name as he hit that spot that made the world tilt. “Right there… oh, fuck… Harder, Dean.” 

Dean growled, thrusting into him even harder. He didn’t stop, but Cas saw him pull down the hand towel and slip it behind Cas’ back for padding against the cold metal. 

The kind gesture was quickly forgotten as Dean began fucking him relentlessly with an iron-like grip on Cas’ hips, leaning forward to completely pin him down. 

His body was bent more than it probably should’ve been, but he loved every second of it. He stripped his cock so roughly between them that when he finally came in short, rapid bursts, some of it hit his own face. On instinct, he dropped his jaw and opened for it, catching some on his tongue and pulling Dean into another kiss by the hair. 

Dean groaned into his mouth and the second Cas sucked his tongue, he came with a growl, slamming into him over and over again until every last drop was settling inside Cas. 

Gasping, Cas kissed him messily until he couldn’t take being in that position anymore and reluctantly pushed Dean back, then stumbled to his feet and held him tight as the come dripped out of his ass and slicked his thighs. “Dean… you’re… I’m…” 

Dean grinned and licked his lips, still breathing hard.  _ “You’re.” _

He wanted to be home so badly it was silly, but there was still a long way to go. Cas ignored Dean poking fun at his inability to speak and slid the tattered remains of his panties off, then put his jeans back on and shoved the ripped fabric into his pocket. “Every single time I think you can’t get any better at that, you prove me wrong.” 

“Every time I think you can’t be more gorgeous, you prove  _ me _ wrong. Cas... those panties... You said you have others? Cause we need more.”

He flushed, nodding. “Yes. I wasn't sure if you’d like them, but after the talk of the maid outfit and the lace jockstrap… Yes. I have more.”

Downstairs, they found Ares and Jask in the living room, staring wide eyed at them. Jask spoke first, pointing at Dean. “If you broke anything, you’re paying for it.”

Ares swatted his hand and laughed loudly, then pushed Jask down onto the couch. “You’re just mad you haven’t made me sound like that in ages. Step your game up,  _ J.”  _

“Dean,” Cas whispered, intending to take full advantage of their distraction. He seemed to get the memo; he grabbed Havoc’s leash and they took off out the door, hand in hand.

After the obligatory stop outside, they finally made their way back into the comfort of their own home, and Cas melted against Dean’s warm, solid body in the dining room. “I love you.” 

“I love you, too. More every single day. It’s crazy.” Dean lifted Cas’ chin and bore into his eyes. “I’m in love with you.”

Happiness radiated through every part of him, and he truly didn’t know how it was supposed to get better than that. Either way, he couldn’t wait to find out. 

~~~~

The next couple of weeks were full of dates and sex. They went on a water picnic, and this time neither one of them fell off the boat, which was an incredibly refreshing change. Dean seemed to be happy they didn’t ruin yet  _ another  _ pie in the name of Pathokinesis. 

Another one of the dates involved making chalk outlines of each other’s bodies and filling the space with words to describe each other, which… would’ve been cute, had that been what actually happened. In the end they teased each other relentlessly and the chalk outlines looked more like crime scenes than inspired art. Neither one of them got more than three words written before Cas was dragging Dean into an alley to blow him. 

One of Cas’ favorites turned out to be one he hadn’t thought he’d like at all. They each had to write down five random words and throw them in a hat, then they drew five of them out and had to write a song together based on those words. Cas’ overall lack of creativity had him convinced that would be horrible, but their song about a brave Congressional ghost being sketched riding a motorcycle was actually kind of funny. Dean’s laugh was easily one of the most beautiful sounds he’d ever heard, and Cas would do a thousand of those ridiculous dates if it meant he could keep hearing it for the rest of his life. 

Their biggest failure to date came when they were tasked with growing their own garden. The premise had been simple enough — buy a few soil pots from a local nursery and plant three seeds. The first one never even bothered to sprout, the second was dead in a week, and the third would’ve done just fine — if they’d have only kept it out of Havoc’s reach. Cas grimaced every time he walked past the garden graveyard in their dining room, but Dean said it was a reminder that they’d always be able to get through the bad things in life, so it stayed much longer than it should’ve. 

In the end, Cas had to get rid of the soil to prevent a bug situation, but they’d gotten creative on their own and decorated the pots so that the reminder would never be too far away. 

It was those clay pots that gave him the courage to try and call his twin again. Dean was right, just because something appeared to be past the point of saving didn’t mean it was useless. He waited until Dean went over to hang out with Jask for a night to finally call, and when he heard his twin’s voice, he was determined to make him see reason. 

“Jimmy, before you say anything — Dad’s fine. He’s better than fine, he’s going to be home in time for Christmas. I’m sorry. I realized I never actually said that to you… and despite our differences of opinion… you still deserve an apology. I’m sorry.”

Silence met him for several long, agonizing moments. All he could hear was Jimmy breathing through the line, and for a very creepy second, Cas wondered if he’d dialed the wrong number. When he spoke, it was without the anger he was used to hearing. “I’m busy, Castiel. You caught me at a bad time. Can I call you back?”

Part of him knew that Jimmy  _ wouldn’t  _ call him back, but he also knew enough not to push. “Of course, Jimmy. Call me any time, day or night.”

“Yeah… Okay.” 

The line went dead, and Cas pulled his phone away from his ear to see a message from Dean telling him he’d be late coming home. Cas scooped Havoc up and went to lie in Dean’s bed with an indescribable sense of hope filling his chest.  _ He didn’t sound angry. Maybe he will call me back? Maybe, just maybe… I’ll have my family back in time for Christmas.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> On Wednesday, pay attention. I’ll be posting three chapters, so make sure you read all three!


	26. Good Intentions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three chapters today, so make sure you read them all. (26, 27, 28)

**Dean**

Coming home to Cas and Havoc in his bed made him smile. He took a picture, because he’d truly never seen anything more adorable than a sleepy Cas spooning a fat little bulldog, and then stripped to climb in bed. 

Cas mumbled something as he wrapped his arms around him, and they both fell asleep with ridiculous smiles on their faces.

As always, Dean had to get up first and for the first time in a long time, he considered calling in sick. The bed was warm and comfy, opposite to what was waiting for him outside. The crisp October air had his balls hiding inside his stomach, but he couldn’t get mad at them; he’d probably do the same if it were possible. 

Sam was wearing some hideous beanie over his mop, and Dean simultaneously wanted to burn it  _ and _ frame a photo of him in it to show him when they were eighty. “Please tell me your girlfriend made that and you  _ have _ to be wearing it.”

“Shut up. At least my ears aren’t screaming, look at yours.” 

“Oh, okay, let me just look at my ears.” Dean turned in a dramatic circle. “Darn, looks like they’re hiding.”

Sam rolled his eyes and set all his stuff down. “How are things with Cas?”

“Goin’ great. I think he might love Havoc more than me now, though.” Dean took a bite of donut. Matt might be annoying, but his midweek donuts definitely helped Dean not hate him.

“Impossible, Cas would never love anything more than you. How is that fat little demon?” 

Dean beamed at that but moved on quickly. “He’s great. Starting to understand that he needs to go by the back door to potty, but he only gives us like ten seconds of warning before he goes in the kitchen. He’ll get there.”

“I can’t believe  _ you  _ got a dog. I didn’t think you’d ever let an animal in Baby.”

“He isn’t allowed in Baby yet, but one day — when I trust him  _ not _ to eat her upholstery, maybe. He’s different though. I love him.”

“Aww…”

“Shut up and work, bitch.”

Sam huffed a laugh and shook his head. “Right back at you, jerk.”

During lunch, he texted Cas and asked him to scratch off another date for them. He sent back a picture, and he needed to grab some childhood snacks from the store.  _ Easy enough, I’ll just buy the whole junk food aisle. _

He spent the rest of the day trying to think of his favorite childhood shows and just couldn’t narrow it down to two, he loved too many. 

After work, he went straight to the store. Cas already ordered delivery and Dean needed to get snacks. Copious amounts of snacks. 

He parked the car and when he got out, he looked up at the couple exiting with only one bag in their hand and froze.  _ Fucking Jimmy.  _ Some people might see him and think it was Cas, but not Dean. Dean had never confused them in his life, and he instantly knew who it was.  _ Ah hell… don’t meddle… fuck it. _

“Hey, Jimmy.” Dean strolled up, not at all surprised by the look of annoyance on his face. 

“Dean. We were just leaving, excuse us.” 

“Hi, I’m Dean.” He held out his hand to take his pregnant fiancé’s hand. 

“Ophelia.” She shook it, even though Jimmy frowned. 

“So… How are things?” Dean shoved his hands in his pockets and walked with them toward their car.

Jimmy turned to face him. “Cut the crap, Dean. Did Cas send you?”

“To the grocery store?” Dean asked. “Uh, yeah, for dinner.”

“You know what I mean. Did he ask you to try to talk to me?”

“No. How would we know you were at the Piggly Wiggly, Jim?” Jimmy turned to leave and Dean grabbed his arm. “Wait!” He shrugged out of his grip roughly, making Dean hold up his hand. “Look, no, Cas didn’t send me. But you should talk to him.”

“Did you two finally get your heads out of your asses and admit you’re in love?” 

_ Yeah, pretty much. _ He ignored the bite in his tone as he stated, “Ask him yourself.” 

“Are we done here?” Jimmy turned to leave again and Dean groaned in frustration. 

“It was a fucking car accident, Jimmy. It wasn’t his damn fault!”

Jimmy turned toward Dean, anger radiating off his body. “Mind your fucking business, Dean.”

Ophelia flinched and reached out for his arm but he shrugged her away. 

“You’ve seen the report. You know it was an accident. Cas did everything right, his light was green. Astarte was ju—” 

Jimmy punched him in the mouth. “Don’t say her name!”

Pushing his own anger down, Dean spat blood onto the ground and continued, “It was fucked up. But it wasn’t anyone but that distracted driver’s fa—”

Jimmy caught him off guard again, this time connecting above his jaw. Ophelia yelped and tried to tell him to stop, and Dean shook it off, bracing against a car.  _ Fucker hits kinda hard… _

Dean realized then that Jimmy hitting him was probably the only way he would get the anger out of his heart and decided he could take this.  _ Better me than Cas. _

“She pregnant?” Dean asked. Jimmy balled his fist again. “Wait,” Dean kept him at arm's length, “you know Cas would make the best damn uncle in the world, Jim.” 

Jimmy hit Dean again, this time in his gut, knocking the wind out of him. He crumpled to one knee and held his stomach. Ophelia begged him to knock it off, but Jimmy approached Dean, hitting him again, and again, and again until Jimmy fell to his knees in tears.

Dean groaned, spitting more blood onto the pavement. “Jimmy,” he pleaded roughly, “it isn’t your fault, either.” He took a chance, reaching out to hold his shoulder and when Jimmy let him, he  _ finally _ felt like he was listening. 

Ophelia kneeled down with him and held him close, letting Dean know she had him. After he nodded at her, he managed to stand and stumble his way into the store bathroom. He cleaned up as best he could, but Cas was definitely going to flip. 

His eyebrow was split, along with his lip and cheek. He’d probably have a black eye tomorrow, but on the plus side, Jimmy never once hit his nose so at least  _ that _ wasn’t bleeding. 

Once he stopped the blood, he looked down at his blood stained shirt, shrugged, then made his way to get Cas snacks.  _ Maybe the snacks will distract him enough to not notice? Yeah friggin right, he’s gonna instantly turn into a nurse. Maybe I shoulda got a nurse outfit… not the time. What are you lookin’ at?  _ It seemed like everyone and their grandmother had to stare at Dean’s roughed up face, but he managed to find a bunch of snacks he loved as a kid and some he remembered Cas mentioning, too. 

When he parked at their home, he took a deep breath and grabbed the bags.  _ Here goes nothin’. _

“Honey… I’m home.”  _ Butter ‘em up, he loves that. _

Cas walked around the corner and immediately dropped the M&M’s he’d been holding. They scattered across the floor, and Cas quickly scooped Havoc up and put him in his crate before he could eat any. He rushed over after, reaching up but stopping shy of actually touching Dean’s face. “Dean… Oh my gods.” He planted a soft kiss to his lips and gestured to the couch. “Go sit, I’ll get the first aid kit.”

Dean nodded and set the plastic bags on the coffee table, sitting where he was told. He thought about how to explain while Cas was gone, but kept coming up short. It wasn’t his place to approach Jimmy, yet he did, and it was possible he made things a million times worse. 

He dropped his head in his hands and flinched from the contact. He could lie... He could say it was a stranger. This wouldn’t have been the first time Dean came home after a fight and Cas had to help patch him up. 

When Cas came back down, he still had no clue how to answer the questions he was sure Cas had. Luckily for him, Cas didn’t say much at all as he cleaned the cuts on his face, looking every inch the concerned little nurse. 

_ Lie... don’t lie... either way I’m screwed. _ “You should see the other guy.”  _ Why the fuck would you say that?! _ Dean closed his eyes and silently cursed himself for not shutting up.  _ Other guy is fucking fine ‘cause I didn’t hit him once. ’Cause he’s your fucking twin. Ugh... shouldn’t have fucking meddled. _ His leg started bouncing nervously as he looked at anything and everything but Cas.

A fond smile spread across Cas’ cheeks and he shook his head. “I can only imagine how bad he looks… Hopefully  _ he  _ has someone in his life that loves him as much as I love you.” He dabbed a little more Neosporin on the worst of his cuts, and then slowly slid the gloves off his hands. “Who was it, anyway?”

They both looked down at Dean’s perfectly fine knuckles and Cas tilted his head slightly, but didn’t ask.  _ Should have never fucking made that joke. Here goes nothin’... _ “Uh... Jimmy.”

**Castiel**

Cas didn’t immediately register that there was anything amiss about that. “Is that a new coworker or something?”

Dean cleared his throat and met Cas’ eyes. “Nah... your twin... but do—”

Abruptly, he stood. “Don’t? Don't  _ what,  _ Dean? I was finally making progress with him, what  _ happened?  _ What did you do to him?”

Dean frowned and stood, too. “Nothin’! I tried to talk to him and he fucking flipped on me!”

_ ‘You should see the other guy.’  _ A vision of his bloody, beaten twin flashed through his mind and Cas backed up, flinching away from Dean. “And what, you just… hit him? You should’ve minded your own damn business for  _ once  _ in your life!” 

“For once — Cas. I didn’t just fucking hit him, that was a joke. A bad one, but no.  _ He  _ hit  _ me _ first. And last I checked, you  _ were _ my fucking business.” Dean moved around him quickly and walked toward the stairs. “Enjoy the fucking snacks.”

The sound of the door slamming made Cas jerk, and he sat down in a heap. There were still M&M’s all over the floor, but he couldn’t bring himself to move. His body was buzzing with adrenaline, betrayal, and fear. Fear that the progress he’d made with Jimmy would be lost, fear that Jimmy would press charges on Dean… and worst of all, fear that losing his temper might’ve pushed Dean away.  _ No. No, of course it didn’t. He knows I don’t mean that… we’ll just… give each other a couple of hours to calm down. Then, we can talk it out and have our date… we have to. This is just a fight.  _

But Dean never came back down. Even after cleaning, taking care of Havoc, and digging through the snacks Dean bought, he was nowhere to be found. Cas tried knocking on his door, but the silence that answered him was clear. Dean didn’t want to see him, and given the fact that Dean beat up his twin brother, Cas didn’t particularly want to talk to him, either.

_ Fine. Maybe tomorrow.  _

Unfortunately, the next day brought absolutely no changes. Dean avoided Cas like the plague, and by that point, Cas was so settled into his anger about it that he wasn’t about to be the one to break the ice.  _ He’s the one that did it. He should apologize first.  _

On and on it went, until Charlie finally cornered him in the food court on Friday. “Okay, what the hell? Where’s your head at?”

“My head is where it should be — on my studies.” He gently moved past her to pay for his tray, and then took his seat in the corner. 

She followed and sat across from him with a sigh. “Cas. Seriously, what happened? I haven’t seen you this inside your head in years. Did something happen with Dean?”

_ Yes. The two people I love the most in this world fist fought each other, and now neither of them will speak to me… and I’m too  _ **_me_ ** _ to figure out how to fix it.  _ “Dean and I are taking some time apart. We think it’s best.” The lie burned on his face, but he stuck to it, distracting himself with a french fry. 

“Time apart? You live together. Did he move out?!”

Cas shook his head, wondering if such a thing wouldn’t just be easier. “No, but he’s been staying most nights with Jaskier. I’m sure Havoc has enjoyed the extra time with his sister, but… I wish Dean would stop taking him every night. I miss him more than I thought I would.”

“What a dick! Do you want to talk about how you got here? Or should I just come over tonight so we can plan Halloween and drink wine? You guys are still doing your Horror Night, right?”

“We got here because I did the absolute worst thing you could do to someone… I assumed the worst. For all I know, I was right, but it doesn’t matter. I should’ve given him the benefit of the doubt, but…” Cas shook his head. “He got in a fight with Jimmy. A fist fight.”

Her eyes widened and she sat up straighter. “Why the hell would they fight? Were you and Jimmy finally talking?!”

“Yes… and no.” Cas’ voice got quieter and he stared at the table. “He told me he was busy, but he’d call me back. That was the night before the fight. And I can assure you… I haven’t heard from him since.”

“Wow. Did Dean go to his house or something? Why the hell would he fight him?” Charlie groaned and dropped her forehead against her palm. “God, that’s fucking typical,  _ ‘I bet I can fix it with my fists’ _ macho bullshit. I’m sorry, Cas.” She reached out to grab his hand. “Do you want to come stay with me for a couple days? To clear your head?”

Cas shook his head, taking a moment to eat some more of his lunch. “I don’t know the full story. He stormed off after I said some… pretty shitty things. To answer your question though, yes. As far as I know, we’re still hosting Horror Night.” Hope spread through his chest and he brought his eyes up to meet Charlie’s. “That’s it. That’s how I get him to talk to me again.”

“Maybe. Unless he’s still  _ Dean _ that night and gets hammered.” She rolled her eyes. “Okay, I’m coming over tonight and we’re planning. Deal?”

“I actually meant planning, but… yes. If you can help me get something together, I can take it to him for approval.”  _ And then seduce him, if I can’t find a way to get us to actually talk first. There’s no way sex won’t lead to at least one of us saying sorry.  _ “I’ll see you tonight?”

“Of course. I’ll bring Chinese food and wine. You just be ready to plan.”

~~~~

Six hours later, they were two glasses of wine deep and stuffed full of the best Chinese cuisine in a twenty mile radius. Cas was thrilled, Dean had at least left Havoc home — and he was currently drinking up all the attention he could get. “You know… I feel like we’re in a custody battle over this dog. And I’m losing.”

Charlie pet his belly and chuckled. “Poor guy. Havoc, I know how it feels to come from a broken home, and I’m here if you ever need to talk.” Havoc leaned over and licked her nose. “I’m glad he left him, did he say where he was going? He took the car, so he didn’t go to Jask’s.”

“No, he didn’t tell me. He was dressed up when he left, though… So, honestly? I’d rather not think about it.” Cas eyed the traitorous Pathokinesis book on the shelf and drank heavily from his wine glass. “I wouldn’t be surprised if he was on a date.” That was a lie, he had more faith in Dean than that… he was simply trying to prepare himself for that eventuality. 

“Well, I’d kick his ass and have Havoc here poop on his pillow.” Charle grabbed a handful of chocolate chips and sat back. “If he brought a date to Halloween, I would literally push him down those stairs.”

Cas shook his head. “He won’t. Even if he is dating again, which I doubt, it’ll be ages before he tells me. I know Dean, he’d never intentionally hurt me like that.” He paused, then laughed. “Not to mention, if he  _ does  _ bring someone to Horror Night, Madison’s brother Matt will be there. I could probably still get a blow job.”

“Ugh, probably. I imagine it would be boring from what you told me about him.” She giggled. “Is that good Castiel? Should I go faster? Please validate me,” Charlie mocked in a horrendously deep voice.

“Anytime someone needs to ask themselves — or someone else — if they should be going faster, the answer is probably yes.” Cas drank quietly, rolling his eyes as he thought of some of his less savory encounters. “That’s one thing I could always say about Dean, though. That man was  _ always  _ going the right speed.”

“Ugh, that has to make it worse. Oh, maybe this will help, name a better lay. Who was the best fuck you ever had?”

“Dean. It’s not even a competition. I’m not sure what I was doing before him was even  _ considered  _ sex.”

“God, of course.” She rolled her eyes and laid her head back. 

Just then, Jask flung the door open with a very drunken Dean in tow. “Geez, remember when this guy could hold his liquor?” Dean giggled like a ten year old boy and booped his nose.

Cas stood immediately. “Why did he drive if he was planning on —” He cut himself off, answering that question for himself.  _ In case he did meet someone, and needed a way to get home in the morning.  _ Instead of helping, Cas moved out of the way and gestured toward the stairs. “Take him up to his room, thank you, Jaskier.”

“You got it, boss.” Jask started leading Dean up the steps, but Dean pulled back and looked at Cas, swaying slightly. 

“You always been adorable when yer grouchy.” Jask tried to pull him along, but he wouldn’t budge, and Cas shot Charlie a look before heading over there. 

“I’ll take him, Jask. Thanks for trying.” Cas looped his arm under Dean’s and bore some of his weight. “Will you go to bed now? Please? If you throw up on the carpet down here, I’m going to be very upset.”

“M’not gonna puke, sweetheart.” Dean started walking again, stumbling up the steps. “Sam says hi—lo.”

_ Did he drink it or bathe in it?  _ Cas turned his nose away from Dean and helped him to his room, muttering, “I’ll be sure to tell Sam something equally nonsensical at Horror Night.” They reached Dean’s door, and Cas stopped, unwilling to go further. “Can you make it the rest of the way?”

Dean leaned against the door frame with a small frown. “Y—yeah. M’fine, goodnight Cas.” He walked in his room and closed the door.

It took everything inside of Cas not to go with him and rub his back until he fell asleep, but he knew that if they were going to make amends, it needed to happen when they were both sober. He stood outside of the door for several long moments, his forehead pressed to the wood. “Dean,” he whispered. “Just… come back. Please.”

_ Please.  _


	27. Drag Me Away (From You)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three chapters today, so make sure you read them all. (26, 27, 28)

**Dean**

Things with Cas were still... awkward. Which sucked. In all of their time as friends, ‘awkward’ was the one thing they never were. But here they were, hardly able to look at one another. The maid outfit arrived and when Dean opened the box, his heart sank.  _ How did things get so damn bad, so damn fast?  _ He shoved it in his closet, wishing he could just go back in time and never approach Jimmy.

Sunday was the first time he and Cas ate together in days, and the realization of that hurt Dean more than his face. But even that dinner was quiet and... overly polite. He hated it.

Which, of course, meant he was grouchy as hell on Monday. “Who the fuck took my hammer?” Dean walked over to a new guy who stopped mid-strike. “You not see that big ass ‘W’ on the handle, buddy?”

“Oh, I — I’m sorry, Sam handed it to me.” The kid’s face turned redder than an apple and he quickly handed it over, then wiped his palms on his jeans. “Are you Dean? I’m so sorry, man.”

“Yeah.” He grabbed the hammer and walked away, even more annoyed when he felt like an ass. “Can it, Sammy.”  _ I can see you judgin’ me from the back of that mop. _

Sam grabbed him by the back of the shirt and dragged him around the corner, then shoved him so he hit the wall. “Don’t tell me to can it, Dean. What the hell is going on with you? You can’t just freak out on new people for no reason, he’s the third temp you’ve done that to in the last week!”

“They’re all asshats.” Dean straightened out his jacket. “What do you care? You really want some pansy with thin skin workin’ here? They’re fine, or they’ll quit. Gotta get rid of the dead weight.” It made sense in his head, but as it came out, not so much. Not that he’d ever admit it. 

That seemed to do nothing for Sam but piss him off, but he got himself under control. “Look, first you’re getting blitzed at family barbecues, and now you’re becoming  _ Dad  _ with the way you’re yelling at people. Tell me what’s going on.”

“I’m not —” Anger radiated through Dean but he squeezed the hammer in his hand and exhaled. He hated the idea of coming off like their father, but he also didn’t have a damn argument. “Nothin’ is goin’ on. I’ll be nice to the cupcakes, alright?” He tried to walk away but Sam’s gigantic body didn’t budge.

“Just…” Sam pushed Dean back again, then dropped his arm. “Talk to me, Dean. Please. Tell me what’s going on. I know it’s something. You’re never like this, you’re normally a new person’s favorite part.”

“I dunno, man. I’m just... feeling like shit. I got my ass kicked by Jimmy and then dumped the same night. I kinda just wanna go away, but I have responsibilities, so... here I am.” Again, it probably didn’t make sense now that he said it out loud, but he didn’t know how else to explain it.

Sam frowned deeply, like something he said hadn’t made sense. “Cas actually dumped you for that? Why didn’t you just tell him the truth?”

“Because. If he knew Jimmy just used my face as a punching bag, he’d probably be pissed at him. I was trying to help, I dunno... like, maybe I could get him to see how much his brother needed him, and he wailed on me at the friggin Piggly Wiggly. I love Cas, Sam. But he needs his brother more. That’s the relationship that matters, no matter how much that hurts to admit. I’d rather they both hated me than each other. Can I go work now?”

“Dean… Jimmy walked out on Cas. If you let him believe a lie that keeps him away from you, are you really any better? I dunno, man. I’m just saying, I know he loves you, too. And Cas should be allowed to make his own decision about which relationship matters.” Sam clasped him on the shoulder and pulled him into a stiff, one-armed hug. “Just think about it, okay? Don't be so self-sacrificing all the time, you’re making the rest of us look bad.”

Dean rolled his eyes and went back to work. He wasn’t trying to be self-sacrificing, he was just used to putting everyone he loved first. He knew Cas was devastated by not having Jimmy at his side through everything. Dean loved Sam; couldn’t imagine not having him to talk to, and they weren’t even twins, that had to hurt. If his pain made it so Cas didn’t have to hurt, then it was worth it. 

The more he thought about it, the more his actions did come across as self-sacrificial, but that was never his intention. That was just how it played out.

~~~~

With everything that had been going on, Dean didn’t have time to shop for a new costume, but he had an older LARPing outfit he got when Charlie Bradbury talked him into going a few years back. Cas was out of town that day and had begged Dean to show him the outfit so many times Dean couldn’t even remember, but he figured this was as good a time as any to bust it out for Cas.  _ Maybe it will start up a real conversation… A guy can dream.  _

The pants were a little tighter than the last time he put them on, but the shirt, leather belt, and chainmail all fit well enough. He stared in the mirror and rolled his eyes.  _ All hail the King of the Nerds. All I need is some dumb blond wig to complete this fuckery. Hope Cas finds me sexy. _ Dean laughed, because ‘sexy’ definitely wouldn’t be the first word that popped into his head if he saw himself. 

He could hear people arriving downstairs and still couldn’t bring himself to go down yet. He helped Cas set everything up before they disappeared upstairs to dress, and even that was awkward as hell. Dean missed how things were so bad it hurt. The bottle of Piehole Whiskey was staring daggers at him and he decided to say fuck it and crack her open.  _ Won’t get too drunk tonight, just a little liquid courage.  _

After a couple shots, Dean slid in his fake sword and straightened up.  _ Alright, let’s do this.  _

But before he could walk to his door, Jask barged in dressed like friggin Thor. “Nice.” Dean walked over and tried to take his hammer. 

“Back off, peasant. You are not worthy of Mjölnir!” J’s accent was mediocre at best, but Dean was still caught up on the peasant comment. 

“Peasant? I was second in command for Queen Charlie’s thingy-magig. Ah, hell, whatever, I can’t remember that nerd crap.” Dean shrugged and offered J some of his whiskey. “Does the God of Thunder want some Piehole for his piehole?” 

Jask looked at it with an amused expression and took a couple of shots, shuddering. “Fuck, that’s… Yeah. Okay, you comin’ down, or what? You  _ gotta _ see Cas.” 

“What’s he dressed as?” Dean asked much quicker than he intended, and then took another shot.  _ Way to play it cool, asshat. _

A soft chuckle filled the space between them and Jask headed for the door, opening it. “Just wait. You’ll see.”

_ Shit. Am I gonna pop an inappropriate boner?  _ Dean sighed and walked past Jask to make his way downstairs. He was more nervous with each step, but he forced one foot in front of the other.

When he reached the bottom, his eyes instantly found Cas.  _ Fucking cowboy?! Yup... boner... Shit... think of bees! No, Cas likes bees... no Cas... ah, shit, he looked at me...  _ “Uh... howdy.”  _ Howdy?! Fucking howdy?! Someone kill me. _

Cas tipped his cowboy hat toward Dean and inclined his head. “Well, howdy yourself… Sir Dean.” He faltered a little at the end, like seeing Dean decked out in chainmail was having a similar effect on him. 

He couldn’t help but grin and walk past him toward the kitchen. Ares was already in there, making himself at home being a hostess like it wasn’t his damn birthday. Dean never did understand why he liked that stuff so much, but he wasn’t complaining. 

They had made a bunch of cheesy Halloween finger foods, and Dean began stuffing his face full of mummy fingers while checking Cas out from a distance.  _ Goddamn, that ass looks fucking perfect. _

Ares nudged him as he grabbed a ghost cookie. When Dean looked over, he smirked. “Looks like you’re a little lost in thought. Contemplating saving a horse, riding a cowboy?”

“Every damn second of every damn day.” Dean forced his gaze away and went back to the food. “He’s better off, though.” 

Sam, Madison, and Matt walked in a few moments later and all progress the guy made with Dean was lost the second he looked at Cas’ ass. “This asshole,” he mumbled with his mouthful so only Ares could hear.

“Hey, if Cas really is fair game now… you’re going to need to get over it. He’s hot, achingly so. You can’t expect the poor guy to just ignore that.” Ares grabbed a meatball eye and popped it into his mouth, letting his own eyes wander down those Wranglers. 

“You’re supposed to be on my side.” Dean narrowed his eyes and snatched the next meatball Ares was reaching for. “Happy Birthday by the way.”

“Thanks.” Chuckling, Ares let the meatball theft slide. “Look, we both know he loves you, okay? Stop being an idiot.”

**Castiel**

“Will you stop being an idiot? He loves you.” Charlie smacked the brim of the ridiculous hat he was wearing and shoved it down so it covered his eyes. “You two are being  _ so, so  _ stupid.”

Cas sighed deeply, using a single finger to free his line of vision again. “I’m aware of that, Charlie. I don’t understand how this happened, and I don’t understand why it’s still happening right now. Did you see him?” The noise he made next sounded an awful lot like a swoon… the heartbroken, depressed swoon of a man that wasn’t allowed to touch the extremely delicious-looking love of his life. 

“Yes, I can see him. I think he did that on purpose, didn’t you ask him to put that on for you like a million times?” She glanced over and smiled. “He was pretty good at LARPing, I still wish you were there that day to see it, but I’m sure you would have just fallen in love then and there.”

_ I was already in love anyway, I was just too stupid to see it.  _ Cas nodded, smiling awkwardly at Matt when he waved. Holding the expression, Cas whispered through his teeth, “Please keep him away from me.”

As if on cue, Matt made his way over with a blush. “Hey, Castiel. How’s the semester coming along?” 

Charle stayed put, and butted in for Cas. “You work with the Winchester bros, huh?”

“Uh… yeah, have for a while now, actually.” Matt nodded, sidestepping a little closer to Cas and turning toward him again, looking like he was gearing himself up to say something. 

_ Nope.  _ The never-ending assault of unrequested dick pics flooded his mind, and Cas quickly searched for an excuse to get out of there. “Oh, would you… look at that, I have to go herd the… sheep.” Cas’ face reddened and he ducked under Matt’s elbow, squeezing between him and Jask on his way to the only safe place in the entire room — Dean. It didn’t register until it was too late that technically, Dean wasn’t safe either.  _ “Help me,” _ he mouthed. 

“What’s wrong?!” Dean tossed the food down and looked around Cas at Matt with a frown. He moved to take a step forward but stopped when Cas touched his arm.

“It’s okay, Dean. I just… don’t want him, and you know how terrible I am at letting people down easy. He didn’t do anything.”  _ Yet.  _ Cas would be lying to himself if he didn’t admit that seeing Dean being protective of him didn’t make him happy, but it also made him ache.  _ Come back to me.  _

“Okay.” Dean relaxed, but only slightly. “Stay by me, I don’t think he’d come too close if you were by me. He didn’t make you uncomfortable, right?”

Maybe he was being selfish, but he’d take any excuse to stay close to Dean. He nodded, moving a little more into his space and looking up at him. “You finally wore it.”

“Yeah... I didn’t have time to shop, and I know I pissed you off last year when I just wore a random nametag for my costume, so...” He waved down at the tunic and chain-mail collar. “You like it?”

Cas let out a little sigh, bringing his hand up to touch the metal links. “You look… very, very good, Dean.”  _ Too good, so good I want to leave this party altogether and remind you of what you’re missing.  _

Dean glanced down at Cas’ hand and then took a step in, smiling down at him. “You look very, very good too.”

“You think so?” Cas glanced down at his tight flannel and bulky belt buckle, chuckling quietly. “I feel ridiculous, but… this costume was already picked out before you and I… well.” He pursed his lips, looking up at Dean through his lashes. “It was  _ supposed _ to be a surprise for you.” 

“It still was. I’m still surprised... Fuck, I m—” 

Just then, their friend Benny walked in and everyone started yelling, cutting Dean off from whatever he was about to say. His entire face lit up at the sight of his friend, and he instantly walked over. “No fucking way, thought you were banned from this state or somethin’, asshat!”

Benny roared with laughter as Cas’ stomach sank. He missed Benny’s response entirely, choosing instead to stare at the spot Dean just was.  _ So close. I was so close.  _ Slowly, Cas turned to greet Benny as well, getting swallowed up in his arms. “Yes, thank you, Ben. Just…” He extricated himself, patting him awkwardly on the shoulder. “It’s good to see you, how long has it been?”

“Oh, c’mon, now. It’s only been a handful of years.” Benny smiled wide, revealing expertly done vampire fangs. 

Dean rolled his eyes and shoved him. “We invite you every year, vampire bitch.” 

Sam came over to give him a hug as well and ask him what the hell he did with his teeth. Benny popped them out, then launched into an explanation about some costume artist he was banging named Andrea. Cas looked around Benny to Dean, trying to get his attention again — but it was gone, at least for the moment. 

Feeling like a shitty human being, Cas walked over to rescue Charlie from Matt, who was now apparently hitting on  _ her.  _ Cas gently placed an arm on her shoulders and pulled her in, kissing her forehead. “What did I miss?”

She chuckled and took a drink. “Seems your friend here likes a challenge. He doesn’t think I’m full lesbian because I just checked out Dean’s ass... but come on... really? Everyone in this house has checked out his ass... except maybe Sam... hopefully not Sam.”

“We both know the only man on planet earth you’d actually sleep with is Ares, and that’s just because you’re insatiably curious about whether or not his eyes are the most  _ unique  _ thing about him.” Cas chuckled, his eyes automatically seeking Dean out. “His ass does look phenomenal, though.”

“Yeah that’s 100% true. Just because I looked doesn’t mean I’d ever sleep with Dean. Ares on the other hand... I’d peg the hell outta that boy.” Charlie giggled and polished off her drink. “Jask said no, I asked.”

Jask heard his name and bounded over, sandwiching Charlie between them. “What did I say no about? I never say no, I’m the fun one.” 

“You told me I couldn’t peg your man without you there, and no, thanks.” She punched him softly in the shoulder.

The vision playing out in his head was hilarious, but all he wanted to do was get back to Dean. He snuck out of the group as Jask retorted, and then made his way out onto the back porch, hoping Dean would follow. 

It took longer than he wanted, but eventually someone was coming out. The slider opened and Ares walked out with a huge grin that faded as he saw Cas’ face. “Hey... you okay?”

“Honestly? I was hoping you were Dean.” His heart sank, and he sighed quietly as he realized Dean probably still didn’t want to talk to him. “It’s stupid, I was relying on a costume to bring him back to me. I am, as Charlie said… an idiot.”

“No, it isn’t stupid. You should have seen his face when you went outside.” Ares sat down next to him and turned his way. “Look, he’s being an idiot, you’re being an idiot. What’s new? Aren’t we all just idiots in love, trying to find our way? J’s also an idiot in case you forgot, but I love him and he loves me. It’s no different except we’ve been together a long time without breaking up, but the beginning was rocky, I promise. You guys will get there.”

Cas sighed, wanting to believe him with everything he was. “I hope so. I don’t seem to know how to fix this, but I don’t want to live without him. I’m sorry that this is going to put a bit of a damper on our camping trip… but at least we’re sort of talking again.”

“I think it will still be fun. We’ll all be unplugged for a couple days, we need it. Plus, the pups will love the time together too. I think the camping trip will be a very good thing, for all of us.” 

Just then, the door opened again and Dean stumbled out ungracefully. “Uh... hi.” He walked over to sit on Cas’ other side with a groan.

Ares smiled at Cas and stood. “You didn’t let J have any more shots, did you?”

Dean chuckled and held up a hand to his ear. “Huh? Sorry, bad connection. Can’t hear you.”

With an eye roll, Ares left, leaving Cas alone with Dean.  _ Finally.  _ He scooted a little closer, blaming the cold fall air. “How much have you had to drink? Enough, or not enough?”

“I’m good. I actually tripped comin’ out here, that wasn’t the booze at all.” He chuckled and patted his lap. “Kinda cold out here, wanna get warm?”

Not hesitating for even a moment, Cas straddled Dean and rested his head on his shoulder. It only occurred to him after that he may have taken advantage of that olive branch, but he couldn’t bring himself to move. “You always did radiate heat.”

Dean wrapped his arms around Cas and sighed into his neck. “Just glad I can always keep you warm.” He placed a gentle kiss on Cas’ exposed skin, and the full body shudder it elicited was almost uncalled for. 

“It’s felt pretty cold lately.” Cas slowly trailed his lips up Dean’s neck and across his jaw, stopping just shy of his mouth. “Halloween could be considered a date… right?”  _ For old times sake, back when this was as simple as a project and taking what we wanted from each other? _

“Yeah.” Dean closed the distance and pressed their lips together, slow and unsure at first, but Cas moaned softly into it, feeling the effects throughout his entire body. That seemed to wake them both up, and the kiss quickly turned into something desperate. 

Dean’s hands slid just under the waistband of Cas’ jeans as he licked into his mouth. The second Cas opened for him he groaned, rutting up into him slightly and Cas stopped being able to focus on anything but the desire to get closer to him.

Seconds before he was going to ask Dean to go upstairs with him, Benny barged out and yelled, “Castiel! Where’s that irritating little twin of yours? I was hoping to catch up with the set, not just you.” He chuckled drunkenly, not realizing he’d just done the verbal equivalent of dumping ice water in Cas’ head. 

He pulled back from Dean. The cuts on his face might’ve healed, but apparently the implication behind them was not. “He’s not here, he couldn’t make it.” Cas stood quickly, backing up a step. He briefly considered just hiding at Jask and Ares’ house until they left for their camping trip the following morning, but he still needed to pack. 

Dean was watching Cas with a worried expression and spoke as if Benny wasn’t even there. “Cas... where are you going?”

Benny finally caught on that  _ something  _ was going on but he just looked between the two of them with a dumbfounded expression.

“I’m sorry, Dean. I— We should sleep. We’re leaving quite early in the morning and I still need to get my things together. I’ll see you then.” He hated himself for shutting down but he couldn’t help it… It was like the very mention of his brother reminded him that things were  _ not  _ as simple as a project and great sex, anymore. They were way, way more complicated than that. 


	28. Slumber Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three chapters today, so make sure you read them all. (26, 27, 28)

**Dean**

“C’mon, J! Get your wife and let’s hit the road!” Dean honked the horn annoyingly, and J flipped him off from the porch before turning to yell something into the house. Seconds later, Ares walked out with Chaos in tow. 

Despite Baby’s size, fitting four grown men, two dogs, and enough camping equipment to last them through the trip wasn’t easy. Havoc nestled pretty easily between him and Cas in the front seat, but that left the other two lovebirds in the back — practically smooshed up against one of the doors. Cas peeked back at them and then smiled a little at Dean. “How long do you think we have before they start making out?”

Dean chuckled and looked in the rearview mirror. “Like thirty seconds?” He could see Chaos cuddled between them and couldn’t help but shake his head fondly. “Chaos will make them keep it PG at least.”

“I think you’re severely underestimating the passion between them.” Cas fell silent, crossing his arms over his chest like he was hugging himself and stared out the window. He didn’t speak again for several miles, when Jask and Ares absolutely  _ were  _ making out overtop their protesting bulldog. “Have you ever been to the cabin we’re going to?”

“No, actually. I’ve been to the lake near it, but not the cabin. It said it came with firewood and stuff, so we’ll stay warm even though it might snow.” Dean tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, just happy to be taking a road trip and getting away for a few days.

Jask leaned forward, sticking his giant head over the back of the bench seat. “Unless you two are gonna kiss and make up, can you shut it and turn on some music?”

“Go away.” Dean pushed him with his elbow, but nodded at the box of cassettes. “Pick somethin’, sweetheart.”

The arrogant ass thought Dean was talking about him instead of Cas, but to Dean’s amusement, Cas shut him down by swatting his hand when Jask reached out for the box. “I’m his sweetheart, nothing will change that. Away with you.” He flipped through, choosing a Lynyrd Skynyrd greatest hits tape and sliding it in the deck. 

Dean stared at the road with a grin that could be seen for miles. Cas claiming to be  _ his _ sweetheart made his stomach do idiotic things, and when he said ‘nothing will change that’, he felt his heart flutter. He nearly reached over then to take his hand, but settled it on Havoc’s head instead.  _ Maybe this weekend won’t be so bad. Maybe I can get him back. _

~~~~

When they arrived, it took way too long to get all their things inside of the cabin, but it came with a record player so Dean was happy; he had a few of those in the trunk. 

Once the food was going and the music was flowing, they all had beers in their hands and smiles on their faces. Jask was telling some horrible joke and Cas... Cas looked absolutely beautiful. “Cas... c’mere a sec.” Dean nodded toward where he was in the kitchen, and when Cas started walking over, Jask did some stupid smile with his tongue out behind his back which made Ares slap his arm.

He reached Dean a moment later, looking around the counter. “Did you need help with something?”

“I don’t wanna be weird but... I honestly just wanted a hug. Is that okay?” He missed touching Cas so bad it physically hurt, but from the way Cas immediately melted into his arms… he must have missed it, too. 

Neither of them moved until Ares cleared his throat. “The burgers are burning, Dean. Can you just…” He placed his palms on Dean’s back and pushed them away from the counter to take over, clicking his tongue in disappointment. “Ridiculous.” 

Dean didn’t care, he backed Cas against the other counter, his face still buried in his neck, reveling in his scent. Ares worked on the food and didn’t interrupt them again, but Jask didn’t get that memo. The ‘aww’ noise he made snapped them out of it and they pulled away from each other with slightly embarrassed smiles.

“Shut up, Jaskier.” 

The giant meathead just clicked his tongue at Cas, then pointed up to the ceiling. “You know there are only two beds, right?” 

_ Two beds? Oh, shit. _ They had made the reservation when things were good, and since things were  _ not  _ so good, Dean hadn’t even thought of the bed situation.

“Yes, I’m aware. I’m the one that booked it like that in the first place.” Cas blushed slightly, helping Ares get the food on the table. “Dean and I will figure something out.”

“Nothin’ to figure out, Cas. I’ll stay on the couch with the pups.”

Jask shook his head widely. “Oh, no. Didn’t Ares tell you? We’ve been sleeping apart for a while now. Orgasms, twenty minutes of cuddling, then my ass is in the guest bed.”

“He snores, it’s  _ awful.  _ I put up with it for years, but now? He knows I love him, I don’t need to sacrifice a good night’s sleep to prove it.” Ares smiled lovingly at Jask, who rolled his eyes, but looked no less adoring. “And before one of you offers to swap for a night, the answer is no. I don’t trust Jask with either one of you… He gets handsy in his sleep.”

Quietly, Cas locked eyes with Dean. He looked nervous, like he was afraid whatever he was about to say wasn’t going to be taken very well. “Dean and I can share. We’re adults, it’s not like we haven’t shared a bed before.” 

“Yeah, even before we ever...” Dean waved his finger between them. “I get a little handsy in my sleep too, though.” He winked at Cas, happy when he saw it still had an effect on him. They ate in silence after that, cleaning up quickly and making their way into the living room. 

Jask and Ares shared a look Dean couldn’t quite place, but it was quickly pushed from his mind as Cas picked up their bags. “I’ll take these to the room, then, since we’re staying together after all.” He disappeared up the stairs, and the look Ares gave him  _ that  _ time, he understood.  _ Go get him. _

Dean tapped his foot on the carpet a few more seconds before he stood abruptly and followed Cas. He went in the wrong room at first and then found Cas standing in theirs. “I, uh... coulda helped with those.”

“It wasn’t a problem, neither one of us packed particularly heavily. Do you want the side closest to the window, like normal?” Cas nodded to the bed as he knelt to unpack his suitcase, pulling out those bee-printed pajama pants he loved so damn much. 

“Yeah, thanks.” Dean pulled off his shirt and started going through his bags. He pulled out his hot-dog pajamas, knowing they’d make Cas smile, and a white t-shirt. “Havoc might give us privacy tonight since he has his sister, huh?”

Cas huffed a laugh but nodded. “I imagine he’ll stay downstairs with Chaos and Jaskier, yes.” He set his pjs aside and grabbed his toothbrush, sighing when he realized he’d actually have to leave the room to put it to use. “Every bedroom should have a bathroom in it, you’ll never convince me otherwise.” He made his way out into the hall, disappearing around the corner. 

Dean changed into his comfy clothes and then sat on the edge of the bed, wondering what his next move should be.  _ Should I make a damn move? Should I keep to my side? Ima fuck this up... I know it. _

When Cas came back in, he was wide-eyed and blushing furiously. “Jask and Ares are… busy. On a completely related note, remind me not to sit on the couch tomorrow — for any reason — unless I put a trash bag down first.” He shut the door behind him, and Dean couldn’t help but laugh.

_ Lucky them. _ “Eww, in front of the dogs? Sickos.” Dean rushed out to brush his teeth and wash up before bed. He was tempted to peek, but decided he shouldn’t. Instead, he went back into the room to see Cas sliding those bee pants over a fucking bright pink pair of lacy panties, still shirtless. 

_ Shit! Friggin instant boner!  _ Dean put his hand over his crotch and stared at Cas with wide eyes. “I... you...”

Cas whirled quickly, his chest flushing gorgeously. “Dean! I’m sorry, I…” He yanked his pants up the rest of the way, but not before Dean got a good look at the bulge barely covered by the lace. “I didn’t expect you back so soon.” 

“It’s okay.” Dean swallowed and awkwardly shuffled to the bed. “You look fucking perfect in those, sweetheart.”

Carefully, Cas climbed in beside him and kept to his own side. He shivered a little, pulling the blanket up to his chin. “Sheets are cold.” He wiggled a little closer, until just the edges of their bodies were touching. “Is this okay?”

“Course, come here.” Dean pulled him up to nuzzle on his chest and kissed his head. His dick was still hard but he was trying to ignore it. “I missed this, Cas. Miss you.”

“I miss you, too.” No one moved a muscle for a solid thirty seconds. It was  _ so _ still that Dean wasn’t even sure Cas was breathing until he felt the soft puff of air on his chin a moment before Cas kissed it. Dean wanted more, needed more… he tilted his head down slowly, afraid that the smallest wrong move would scare Cas away. 

Their lips met almost by accident, but that was all Dean needed to keep going. He rolled Cas onto his back and kissed him again, more sure with each passing second.  _ I love him so fucking much!  _ Dean’s chest ached with relief and if he wasn’t so damn turned on he probably would have shed a damn man tear.

“Dean, Dean… wait.”

Dean pulled back instantly, feeling like an asshole. “Shit. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have... I’m sorry, Cas.”

“No, Dean — that’s not… Fuck, I want you so bad I can barely get the words out.” Cas flushed, holding Dean close. “I’m sorry. I should’ve never blamed you for what happened with Jimmy. I overreacted, and then I didn’t know how to fix it. Whatever happened… I’m sure you had a reason, I know you’d never intentionally do something to make the situation worse.” He huffed, seemingly proud of himself. “I just… needed to get that out.”

“No... I didn’t help the situation, and I said that dumb joke that made you probably picture your twin all fucked up and that was stupid. I never hit him, Cas. I’m sorry I didn’t try to fix it all, this is on me.”

Cas shook his head quickly and pulled Dean’s attention to him completely, as if there was any chance it wasn’t already on him. “It’s on  _ us,  _ Dean. Not you or me specifically. It’s on  _ us.  _ And I’m sure that in the morning, you’ll tell me what the hell that means… but I need you to know that either way, I forgive you and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have gotten so angry to begin with. I love you.” 

“I love you.” Dean kissed him again, practically whimpering into his mouth. It was then he decided that pride wasn’t worth losing Cas, nothing was.

**Castiel**

Hearing Dean say those words again was almost too much. Cas clutched onto him, arching up to bring their bodies together as much as he could without physically melting into Dean. “I need you, Dean.”  _ I have needed you, so badly. I don’t know how I stayed away so long.  _

“Need you, too.” Dean brought their lips together again, this time sliding his body on top of Cas’ and grinding down onto him.

Their sweet kisses turned needy in seconds, and their clothes were practically ripped from their bodies. Dean hovered over him, staring down at those pink panties with his bottom lip between his teeth. “You’re so fucking hot in those.” 

He leaned down to mouth at the fabric with a sinful growl that made Cas swear under his breath and beg for more. 

Dean sloppily kissed his way back up Cas’ frame and bit below his chin, making him gasp and arch up into his rock hard cock. “We’re leavin’ these on.” He positioned between Cas’ legs, shoving them aside with his own and rutted his bare cock against Cas’ panties.

The groan he released was delicious, and Cas realized then just how deep Dean’s panty kink was. His eyes closed tightly and his body shook with each measured thrust against his clothed, leaking cock. 

Dean dropped his face into Cas’ neck as his movements became more erratic by the second, and Cas felt like one of them was sure to explode. “Cas… fuck…gon— come!” Cas latched onto Dean’s shoulder, shoving him over the edge so fiercely he came completely unglued. Dean’s release painted Cas’ stomach and pooled inside his belly button. He continued to rut down until Cas was gripping Dean’s hips in desperation. He thrust up, crying out at the way the come-covered lace fabric was rubbing over his cock, until he hit that glorious edge and filled up his panties. “Fuck!” Cas gasped, digging his nails into Dean’s back and pinning them together. 

Dean laid there with his face buried into Cas’ neck while they panted, coming down from the most intense orgasm Cas had had in a long time. 

Slowly, Dean began kissing up his neck towards his mouth. That kiss felt better than he could’ve dreamed — like coming home after a really long, disastrous vacation that he never wanted to be on in the first place. They stayed flush, kissing all the doubt off each other’s faces until Cas actually started to believe it was going to be okay again. 

“Fuck, I missed you so bad, Cas. I don’t even know how I stayed away so damn long. You smell so good.” Dean sniffed up his neck behind his ear, sending a ticklish shiver down his spine. Cas made a noise entirely too close to a giggle and tried to squirm away, but Dean had him caged. 

“Dean!” The ass just growled and pinned him harder to nibble on his earlobe, then sat up with that playful-boyish grin that always made Cas melt and stared into his eyes. Cas let his breathing calm as he looked into those seas of green, recentering his entire world around the man above him. “I missed you, too. That was such a stupid thing to fight about. I… I’m so sorry, Dean.”

“I’m sorry, you’re sorry. Let’s do better. Next time maybe we... communicate before blowin’ up. I mean, we were doing communication shit before and when shit got real, we bailed. Let’s... be better... together.”

_ Better together.  _ Cas nodded, feeling the truth of those words in his bones. “You’re right, Dean. You’d think I’d have known better… Maybe I should pay closer attention in class.” He grinned, running his hands up and down Dean’s arms just to feel his skin. 

“It’s okay, you were probably daydreaming about your hot boyfriend, so it’s fine. You get a pass.” Dean kissed him softly and rolled off, but Cas followed immediately to lay against him. 

“I was. It’s a problem, honestly. It’s a miracle I’m not moaning in the middle of his lecture hall.” 

“That actually sounds sexy as hell. Can we fuck at your school one day?” Dean raised his eyebrows at Cas and grinned, which only served to prove how serious he was. 

_ Fuck.  _ “Yes. Yes, we can. No, we… we  _ have  _ to.” Cas squirmed, entirely too turned on by that prospect. “We need to do that many times. As many times as possible. Can we go right now?”

Dean laughed and kissed him again. “God, I love you. I’ll just show up one day all dirty from work for ya.”

The whine Cas let out was frankly embarrassing, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. “If you show up dirty, there is zero chance I won’t get kicked out of Madbay. I just hope you’re ready to support me for the rest of our lives.”

“Yup. I’ll take care of you, screw the banana hammocks.” Dean looked down at the mess they were laying in and licked his lips. Cas followed his gaze and ran his fingers through it, then immediately regretted licking it off.

“That’s absolutely hotter in the moment…” He grimaced and smiled fondly at the look on Dean’s face, then pulled the blanket up over them. “We’ll clean it up in the morning. Go to sleep.”

“You dirty darlin’... I like it.” Dean nipped his neck and then kissed his cheek. “Sleep good, baby.”

And for the first time in weeks, he finally did. No nightmares, no tossing and turning, no struggling to fall asleep for hours wishing Dean was with him. He slept so well that when Jask knocked on the door to wake them up the next morning, he didn’t want to move. 

Dean was hungry enough that he wiggled out of bed, and they spent a few minutes cleaning up from the previous night before taking showers and scarfing down some donuts. 

It was a pretty calm morning, right up until Dean plopped down onto the couch… and it  _ squished.  _ “What the — ” Dean sprang up, wiping his ass and whirling around to stare at the couch. “Ah, Jesus. Why the fuck…?”

Jask barked a laugh which earned him a slap on the arm from Ares. “What’s the matter, D?” 

“It’s wet!” He leaned over, pressing his palm into the fabric and watching water pool around his fingers. “Is the ceiling leakin’ or somethin’?” 

Howling, Jask shook his head. “Couldn’t trust you idiots. We lied, Ares and I don’t sleep apart, so as an insurance policy, I dumped a...  _ little _ bit of water on the couch before sneaking upstairs to be with him. Didn’t want you coming down to get a drink and thinking the couch was fair game, but… judging by the sounds we heard, guess I overreacted.” 

_ That’s an understatement.  _ While it was irritating that they could no longer sit on the couch, Cas was also incredibly grateful to them for caring enough to go to such extremes. It almost made up for the fact that Dean was now yelling about deposits and common decency, while Jask heartily maintained ‘it would dry’. 

At least that gave them an excuse to actually go outside — Cas had been a little afraid that everyone else was going to chicken out on him and would want to stay in thanks to the cold, but he was itching to go explore the surrounding area. They bundled up and made their way outside, quickly splitting up to cover more ground.  _ Right, it couldn’t  _ **_possibly_ ** _ be because Jaskier has the same thought that I do.  _ He rolled his eyes at his own sarcastic thought, then patted the small bottle of warming lube in his pocket.  _ My turn.  _

Luckily for him, Dean seemed to know exactly what was coming. He checked their surroundings briefly then pushed Cas up against a tree, kissing him hard and rutting their bodies together until Cas could no longer feel the chill in the air. “Oh, fuck… Dean…”  _ This isn’t how this is supposed to go.  _ Cas flipped them around, pinning Dean so he was facing the trunk of the willow tree, grateful for the small amount of cover the yellowing leaves draping around them provided. 

He nipped at Dean’s neck just over his pulse point and ground against his ass. “You’re mine, Dean. Pull your pants down and bend over, show me that pretty little ass. I’m going to fuck you without even taking my panties off… they’re green this time, if you’re curious… like your eyes.”

“All yours, sweetheart. Fuck me in them panties.” Dean slid his jeans down just far enough to expose his ass, and Cas couldn’t stop himself from bending down and biting one of those gorgeous, exposed cheeks. 

Cas worked him open as quickly as he could, knowing it was too cold out to waste time. But the heat radiating off of Dean helped a lot, and by the time Dean was begging for him, they were  _ both  _ more than ready. Cas undid his jeans and slid his panties to the side, freeing his cock and lubing it up.  _ Thank god for thermoception.  _

Sliding inside Dean again was a little like a dream, and though it took him longer than he’d like to bottom out, he kept their bodies flush after that in an attempt to keep his balls warm enough to perform. Cas buried his nose in the back of Dean’s neck and rocked into him, splaying his fingers across Dean’s and planting one set of hands against the tree while he brought the other pair down to Dean’s crotch to palm over the fabric. There wasn’t much space to work with — Cas was too intent on breathing in Dean’s scent and soaking up as much of that body heat as he could with heavy jackets between them — but it was so encompassing and wonderful that Cas was tipping over way before Dean. 

“Fuck, Dean… you feel incre—  _ ahh…”  _ Cas came with a sigh, milking himself dry in Dean’s ass and pulling back to enjoy the sight of it dripping out. “You’re amazing. Now turn around, I want you to come in my throat.”

Dean groaned as he turned. “Fuck, you look hot as hell like that, Cas.” He motioned toward his heavy cock still hanging out of his panties.

Pressing his hand against Dean’s chest, he held him against the tree as he kissed him breathless, then dropped to his knees on the frozen ground and feverishly worked his way through Dean’s jeans until he was swallowing that huge, leaking cock. It didn’t take much to get what he wanted, and Dean’s sinful moan echoed through the trees as Cas swallowed every drop. 

It definitely wasn’t perfect, but it was damn close to it. They fixed their clothes and took their time finding their way back to Jask and Ares, taking every opportunity to warm each other up in any way possible. When they finally did find their friends, Jask looked  _ exactly  _ as fucked out as Dean, and Cas chuckled quietly as he high-fived Ares. 

The couch was still soaked when they returned to the cabin, but they improvised by throwing every pillow and blanket they had onto the living room floor. Dean built a fire while Ares took care of the snacks and few minutes later, the four of them were snug in their own little cocoons. 

Cas wasn’t sure he’d ever been happier in his life. 

He had friends that loved them, he’d fixed things with Dean, and his father would be home for Christmas. What could possibly be better? 


	29. Unity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters today (29 & 30). Posting will resume as normal next week for the final three!

**Dean**

When they got home on Monday, nothing could have stopped them from sleeping the rest of the day away in Dean’s bed. They decided to take Tuesday off, too, and Dean couldn’t remember the last time they played hookie, so he was excited. 

He descended the stairs and smiled when the smell of bacon smacked him in the face.  _ God, I love that dude.  _ “Mornin’ sunshine. Wanna have a day date?”

Cas grunted, nodding a little and reaching for his coffee. “Grab the book, I used all my energy to make you an entire pound of bacon.” 

Dean walked up and kissed his temple before grabbing the book. “Alright... pick a page.” Cas looked so fucking adorable and there were seconds where he couldn’t believe the camping trip actually happened. Everything was going to finally be okay.

“Mm… twenty-seven.”

“You got it...” Dean flipped to the page and picked one to scratch off. He couldn’t help but laugh at the visual. “We have to get a piñata and fill it with candy, and then punch it. I vote mini alcohol bottles  _ and _ candy. Oh, and we gotta be blindfolded again.”

“Punch it?” Cas three a bitchface in his direction and sighed. “With fists? Blindfolded?” He shifted, looking down at his own hand. “Why do I get the feeling that one of us is coming home with extremely bloody knuckles from accidentally punching a tree or something? What if we punch a person?”

“Ehh, wouldn’t be the first tree nor person punch for me. We’ll wear gloves. C’mon, I haven’t thrown a punch in months.”  _ Although I really, really wanted to a couple weeks ago, but we won’t go there. _

Cas nodded, shoving a piece of bacon in his mouth and getting the orange juice out of the fridge. “I suppose you deserve it. We lost a lot of time though, should we do two?”

“Yeah, we can do two, let me look and see if there is another one we can squeeze in.” Dean flipped through a few pages. “Ima scratch this one... okay, it says to go a mile away and dance for a half hour, doesn’t matter where. Sound good?”

A soft smile crept across Cas’ face. “That sounds like an excellent way to end a potentially violent date, actually. I’m looking forward to it already.”

“Awesome.” 

They managed to make it outside after some heavy make out sessions, and when they went to the store, their only piñata options were Spongebob or a Unicorn. “I vote Unicorn, I hate that sponge’s laugh. Or wait, beating the shit outta him could be fun... I don’t know, you choose.” Dean positioned behind Cas and wrapped his arms around his torso, resting his chin on his shoulder while they stared at the two piñatas.

“I don’t know. Hitting a unicorn seems… innately wrong. Not to mention, the sponge would probably be easier to actually hit. Bigger target.” He tilted his head to the side, placing his hand over Dean’s. “I vote Spongebob.”

“You got it.” Dean kissed his neck and then they walked hand in hand to the candy isle. “Alright... now candy. I did like watching you eat that sucker...”

Cas slowly licked his lips, and Dean watched as his pupils expanded. “Are you saying you want me to eat another blueberry cock sucker… in the middle of a park?” 

“I wasn’t, but yes... now I do. We’re at the wrong store for the candy we need.” Dean pulled his hand and practically skipped to the register to pay for the piñata, and then drove over to the sex store. “Wanna come in or should I just grab us candy?”

Blinking, Cas stared at the door. “Dean, I’m pretty sure if there are kids present, whatever you’re planning might get me registered as an offender. Maybe we should pick somewhere other than the park?”

“I was actually thinking the trail into the woods... but... shit...” Dean tapped his hands on the steering wheel, trying to come up with a plan.

“We could… no, nevermind.” Cas blushed furiously and shook his head, then nodded toward the store. “Go ahead, surprise me. We’ll find somewhere.”

“Nah, say it. Think about it.” Dean got out and ran inside the store. He was nearly distracted by all the sex stuff, but he ended up finding a blend of normal candy  _ and _ inappropriate ones to fill the piñata enough, and then made his way back out. “I’m all ears, Cas.”

“Nude beach.” The words came out so quickly that Dean barely caught them, so Cas slowed down. “There’s a… nude beach about an hour from here. It’s likely one of the few places we could go and get away with it.”

Dean chuckled and shrugged. “Not like we got anything else going on. Let’s do it, we’ll even dance in the headlights there and... maybe some other things.” With a wink, he drove them home to grab a few things for the beach, and then started their spontaneous journey. “Gonna be cold so you gotta stay close, wifey.”

“I won’t mind staying close, that’s for sure. But hopefully the chill will keep people away, though… for November, it  _ is  _ unseasonably warm.” Cas fidgeted most of the way, but the little tease palmed himself more than once. 

When they got there, they realized there really weren’t a lot of trees at that beach, but were finally able to find one and strung up Spongebob. “Alright, you first baby.”

Cas put on the blindfold and took a deep breath, then swung with his right fist and missed completely. Dean chuckled at how adorable Cas looked trying to throw a punch, and then gripped his hips. “Feet here... stand like this...” He kissed up his neck, “then throw like this... with your body.”

“I can fight just fine when I can actually see what I’m aiming at,” Cas said defensively. “Don't judge me.” He planted his feet and connected on the second attempt, but the piñata didn’t so much as dent. 

_ Eek, touchy. I just wanted to cop a feel. _ Dean took a step back and watched him, shamelessly checking out his ass. The rest of Cas’ thirty seconds went by without him making contact again, which just meant that by the time the buzzer on Dean’s phone went off, he was red-faced and thoroughly embarrassed. 

“I’ll just keep this blindfold on until I die.”

Dean leaned in and kissed his lips, taking advantage of the fact that his eyes were covered and sliding his hands inside the back of his jeans. “My turn.”

A soft gasp left Cas’ lips. “Hit it hard, I want that sucker.”

“You got it.” Cas secured the blindfold and Dean took his stance. He waited a second, trying to hear it moving in the light breeze and then swung, hard, connecting with what he hoped was the sponge’s face.

Nothing happened, so Dean waited another second and then swung harder, punching his fist through the cardboard and spilling out all the candy. “It broke right?” He had to pull his wrist back out with help from his other hand.

“Yes, Dean. It broke.” Cas let out a breathy laugh and removed Dean’s blindfold, kissing him quickly. “I should’ve known I didn’t stand a chance, and neither did poor Spongebob.”

“So, you wanna… suck it on your knees… sweetheart.” Dean smiled a toothless grin and then leaned in to nip Cas’ lip.

Cas pulled back with a curious, yet flirty expression. “Suck what, Dean?”

“It’s cherry this time,” he leaned in to whisper, “and bigger than the last one.” Dean bent over and picked it up, twirling it in his fingers with his bottom lip between his teeth.

Nodding, Cas looked around. “Do you want me clothed?”

“Yes, don’t want anyone seeing my goods.” Dean watched as Cas dropped to his knees and glanced around, his dick twitching at the sight. He pulled off the wrapper and slid it across Cas’ lips, his tongue hanging from his mouth as his eyes blew with lust. 

The second Cas opened his beautiful mouth and sucked the sucker in, Dean was done for. “Fuck... I gotta cash somethin’ in, sweetheart.” He pulled out the ‘public restroom facefucking’ currency and handed it over to Cas.

He looked at it for a moment and then glanced toward the restrooms, nodding quickly. “Yes, okay. Yes.” Cas stood up, gripping onto Dean’s shirt and pulling him toward the entrance. “Again, I’ll ask… clothed, undressed, or partial?”

“I wanna see that leaking cock, baby... so partial. Take off your shirt and pull your jeans down so you don’t have your knees on the dirty floor. No touching yourself.” Dean opened the door and locked it behind them, turning to devour Cas with his eyes, fully tenting his jeans.

Slowly, Cas stripped, tossing his shirt onto the floor and dropping to his knees again. With practiced hands, he freed his cock from his jeans and fisted it for a moment, licking his lips as he watched Dean move in front of him. “I don’t care if someone walks in. Once you start, don’t stop until you’re coming down my throat.”

“I don’t care who walks in here, baby.” Dean stared down at him, stroking himself slowly and sliding his wet tip across Cas’ lips. “Lick it, sweetheart. Taste me.”

He did, his entire body shuddering and eyes fluttering closed as his tongue slid across the head of Dean’s cock. “You’re delicious, you know that? I’ll never get enough.”

“Hope not.” Dean slapped his heavy cock against Cas’ plump lips and pushed inside with a groan. Cas reached behind him to grip his own ankles, his cock thick and needy between his legs as he opened for him, holding eye contact. 

Dean was far too turned on to take his time here, he gripped Cas’ sex hair and thrust in and out, staring down at the most beautiful man in the world until he was slamming inside and filling up his throat.

He instantly returned the favor, and they walked to the car with huge dopey grins on their faces. They found a little spot to dance until far too late for a weeknight, but neither cared; they were just happy to be together.

**Castiel**

Over the next two weeks, they crammed in enough dates to make up for the time they’d lost. That ridiculous book wanted them to make a comic strip expressing themselves and their relationship, and Dean took it upon himself to draw stick figures in some very compromising positions, which made Cas laugh so hard he’d spilled almost an entire can of body paint. Luckily for them,  _ that  _ date wouldn’t have turned out the way the book wanted it to anyway, unless the people behind Pathokinesis wanted them to completely disregard the rules about ten seconds in and turn it into one of the messiest frotting sessions they’d ever had.

The inappropriate twists continued, not that Cas was complaining too much. They had been tasked with tie-dying t-shirts, and though Cas would never understand  _ how  _ he did it, Dean managed to tie-dye a perfect green and blue penis in the middle of the shirt he made for Cas. Part of that date was supposed to involve wearing their new shirts out in public, so Cas compromised by throwing a zip-up hoodie overtop it and flashing Dean every few minutes while they knocked yet another date off the list — going to a restaurant they’d never been to and ordering their waitress’ favorite dishes, then driving to the theater and watching the next movie set to start, no matter what it was. 

They combined yet another two dates by using dice to decide left or right turns, finding a spot to try and build kites using only items they already had at home. Much to Dean’s dismay, Cas finally decided to get him back for all of the penises and used Dean’s second favorite pair of bumming around boxers to make his kite. They were supposed to have a picnic there, too, but when Dean saw his unmentionables flying around in the fall air, he’d chased Cas clear around the park and pinned him up against the wall of an abandoned pavilion — all thoughts of food were pushed from their minds. 

Since mashing up two of the dates seemed to work better than anything else, they did that one more time just to catch up to where they should be. It took some creative thinking to make it work, since one of them involved buying five random gifts for the other at a dollar store, and the second required them to steal items from their own house and then pawning them to pay for their ideal date, but they made it work. The gentleman at the pawn shop they chose was very confused when they showed up with ten valueless items, and even more confused when Cas snatched the tiny little bee knickknack from the pile. “You can’t have this one, it’s… special.” In the end, he’d given them a whopping four dollars for their trouble — and only because Dean begged him to — which meant their date ended up being ice cream cones at the McDonald’s down the road. 

By the time Friday rolled around, they were both exhausted and looking for something simple to stay on track. Dean found one in the book that said it would take less than an hour, so they scratched that one off. Cas pulled the book close and read it over, his face getting redder by the moment. “This… no. Absolutely not. They want us to go to a pet store and pick out fish. Name them, give them backstories, and then set them free in a body of water. I absolutely refuse to do this, if the fish aren’t given proper time to acclimate to a new habitat, they’ll die — not to mention, probably get eaten even if they  _ do  _ survive the completely involuntary migration. Maybe I’m wrong, but this seems incredibly dangerous for those fish. And why,  _ why  _ would they assume we’d even want to set them free after giving them names and personalities? What possible—”

Dean shut him up with a kiss, laughing against his mouth. “Cas, sweetheart, we don’t have to do it. We’ve done every damn date in this book so far, no matter how insane… I’m pretty sure we can take a pass on this one.”

As Cas tried to contemplate the possible implications of that, someone knocked on the door. He sighed, looking over at it with a frown. “It’s not Jask or Ares, they always use the slider and they’d just barge in, anyway. Did you order pizza?” Dean shook his head, so Cas walked over to see who it was. “If it’s someone selling Bibles, I’ll —” He swung upon the door and stopped dead in his tracks, his jaw going slack. “Jimmy?”

Jimmy looked slightly nervous and scratched his head. “Hello, Castiel. Is… this a good time?”

Dean walked over and swung the door open more, standing straighter when he locked eyes with Jimmy. “Sup, Jimmy? Here to talk, or punch people?” 

Jimmy frowned and shook his head. “No punching. I just want to talk to my brother. I owe him an apology.”

The words had Cas’ chest tightening and he found himself fighting the urge to launch himself at his twin — whether to fight him or hug him, he wasn’t quite sure yet. He stepped aside and gestured for Jimmy to come in, then shot a glance at Dean to ground himself. “I wasn’t expecting this.”

“I know. Just... call me if you need me.” Dean took another look at Jimmy, and pulled Cas into a soft kiss. “My door will be open.” He scooped up Havoc and walked up the stairs.

Jimmy stood next to the couch awkwardly and huffed a laugh. “Kinda like him now... He used to be a douche.”

“Do you like him now because you beat him up and he didn’t fight back?” It was just a guess, he never had gotten the full story from Dean — but from the few comments he  _ had  _ made and the lack of bloody knuckles when he came home, Cas was pretty sure he wasn’t wrong. 

Jimmy actually looked apologetic for that, and he took a seat. “Well, yes, but not for the fact that he didn’t hit back. It was the things he said and how... hard-headed he is. Anyone I know would have fought back or walked away, but it was as though he would have stayed there forever... or as long as it took to open my eyes. Even on his knees, he was the bigger man there. I’m... ashamed. I owe him an apology as well, but I felt the whole point of that was for this.” He waved a hand between them. “I’m sorry, Castiel. For everything.”

“Oh.” It felt woefully inadequate, but Cas’ mind was flooded with visions of Dean laying down and taking whatever Jimmy threw at him just to help him burn off the anger that kept him away for so long. It was making Cas want to leave Jimmy downstairs in favor of running up to Dean’s room and falling at his feet. Never in his life had someone cared so deeply for him, and the shame that coursed through his veins when he remembered he’d blamed Dean for something he hadn’t done and allowed it to get between them for weeks was almost too much to bear. And now Jimmy, his  _ twin,  _ was sitting in his living room and trying to make amends after their relationship had been nonexistent for years.

“I know it’s a lot. I should be more specific.” Jimmy took a shaky breath and cleared his throat. “It was never your fault. I never should have blamed you. I was just so angry... at the world. I never should have taken it out on you. You, who’s always been there, the closest person in the world to me. I’m so sorry, Castiel.”

Words wouldn’t come. He opened his mouth twice to try and say something, anything, but the sounds died in his throat as the well of emotions crescendoed and started spilling out of his eyes. In two quick steps, he hauled Jimmy to his feet and hugged him tight enough he feared he’d crack a rib. 

Jimmy didn’t speak again, he wrapped his arms around Cas and held him. Based on the sniffle, he was crying too, but neither let go. Cas tilted his head down and buried his nose in his brother’s shoulder, curling his fingers against his back. “I didn’t… I never… Fuck, Jimmy. I miss her so much, I’m so sorry.”

“I miss her everyday. And I miss you, too. We shouldn’t have had to lose each other too. I hope one day you can forgive me.” Jimmy squeezed tighter, and Cas shook his head quickly. 

“I forgive you. Right now. There’s no ‘one day’ about it. Losing you was almost worse than losing mom, and I don’t care about any of those things you said about me. I just want my family back, and  _ you  _ are my family.” Cas pulled back, wiping his face and letting out an overwhelmed chuckle. “Do you want to stay for dinner?”

“I can’t. Ophelia is at a doctor’s appointment not far from here, and I just couldn’t wait any longer. I have to go get her. It’s a girl, Castiel. You’re going to have a niece soon. And Dean was right, you will be the best uncle in the world.”

A startled, happy sob made its way out of Cas’ chest and then he was crying in earnest, and didn’t stop until long after Jimmy left and Dean came down to hold him. His face was a puffy, swollen mess by the time he extricated himself from Dean’s arms, but Dean kissed away the tears all the same. 

Somehow, against pretty much every odd he’d ever heard of, Cas was finally going to be whole again. And the rest, well… the rest would work itself out, too. 


	30. Southern Comfort

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters today (29 & 30). Posting will resume as normal next week for the final three! 
> 
> Also, here's an overload of Dean.

**Dean**

Ever since Jimmy came over, Cas was practically glowing. He still had his sassy moments, but he was so sweet toward Dean that he was getting cavities — not that he was complaining. 

He could tell when Jimmy would text, because it was probably the only person that could distract him from a conversation, even in the middle of scratching off their dates. “Earth to my wife,” Dean joked.

“Oh, sorry.” Cas chuckled and set his phone down.

“It’s okay, I love that smile.” Dean kissed his cheek. “Alright, so we gotta few things to do here, and I kinda got a plan. We start at the park and we take a  _ silent _ fifteen minute walk holding hands. Then, we can talk for another fifteen minutes while still walking, but we have to find swing sets and push each other for five minutes. Whoever is pushing has the floor, meaning the one swingin’ has to be quiet and just listen. Which might be awkward, but we’re allowed to talk about anything we want. Then we’ll dance in the headlights, get drunk, and stargaze. How’s that sound?”

Cas blinked. “How many dates did you scratch off while I was busy?” 

“I uh...” Dean looked down and counted them. “Three.” He smiled as innocently as he could. “I know we’re runnin’ low on time for your paper, so... I figured we could combine them.”

“You’re a genius, you know that?” Cas kissed him deeply, then pulled back and flipped the book closed. “I think that’s a wonderful idea, but since we’ll be outside for the rest of the day and well into the night, I vote we camp out in the living room tonight in front of the fire.”

“That sounds like the best way to end the night, sweetheart.” Dean stood up. “Let’s set it up now, so when we get home it’s all done and I’ll just have to get the fire goin’.”

They spent the next few minutes dragging Dean’s mattress down the stairs and bringing just about every pillow and blanket they owned into the living room, and Dean stocked the fireplace with wood and some old newspapers. Cas grabbed his jacket when they were done and smiled at him so wide it looked like it was going to break his face. 

“You’re adorable, you know that?” Dean gripped his hair and pulled him in for a kiss, not caring that it looked completely fucked when he let go. 

They made it to the park and bundled up before choosing their trail, and Cas held out his hand. “Fifteen minutes of silence now, right? Do you have a timer set, or should we just guess?”

“How bout I set a timer?” Dean pulled out his phone and set one. “Let’s go.” 

It started with them both stealing glances and shooting smiles at each other, but after half of their time was up, the silence was comfortable. Dean’s mind wandered to how much he loved Cas and how he would do anything for him, and when their fifteen minutes were up, Dean knew. 

He wanted to marry Cas.

“We can talk now, right? Are we supposed to talk about what our thoughts were?” Cas snaked his hands under Dean’s jacket to keep warm, and placed a soft kiss to his jaw. “We can keep moving in a minute.”

Dean blushed furiously and hid his face in his neck.  _ No, not yet... _ “Uh, I think so? I think we can talk about anything though, do you... wanna talk about our thoughts?”

“I was thinking about how incredibly lucky I am to have you. I never got to properly thank you for what you did for me with Jimmy.” Cas held him tighter, squeezing like he was trying to crawl right into Dean’s body. “I will never find the right words to tell you how grateful I am.”

“I feel the same... I was kinda thinkin’ the same, baby. I don’t know what I did to keep you, but I never... ever want to fuck this up.”  _ I hope you look at me and see forever... cause that’s what I see when I look at you. _

Cas shook his head slightly and kissed the tip of Dean’s nose which was pink from the cold air. “We fight, just like everyone else. But now we know that no matter how bad the fights get, we can and will find our way back to each other. I’m not going anywhere, Dean. I love you with all of me.” 

Dean kissed him and pulled him up to his tiptoes to give him eskimo kisses. “I love you with all of me too, Cas.”

He smiled, his cheeks flushed, and led the way to the swings. “Do you want to talk first, or listen?”

“Uhhh...” Dean scratched his head, “I’ll talk first.”  _ That way you don’t tell me how much you love me and I end up proposing to you on a damn kids swing. _

Cas nodded and sat down on the swing, hissing quietly. “That’s cold. Okay, you’re supposed to push me? Why do I have a feeling you’re going to twist the chains until I throw up everywhere?”

“I would never.” Dean grinned, gripping the chains and pulling back. “I honestly don’t know what to talk about, so I kinda just want to share a story with you. It’s the day I discovered that you were hot and jacked off to you for the first time.” 

He went into the story from junior year. He remembered it vividly, Cas getting teased for wearing a bumblebee t-shirt and him telling the guy to fuck off before a guy in a bee shirt kicked his ass. He would have paid to see that, but also absolutely would have decked the guy if he laid a finger on Cas, even then.

“That was what did it for you?” Cas laughed, pumping his legs to swing higher, then leaning back to look at Dean upside down. “Me getting teased?” 

“No, you not lettin’ that asshat get over on you. It was hot as hell, the dude had like 50 pounds on you. You have heart, babe. A huge heart, with everything.” Dean grabbed him suddenly and stopped the swing, practically knocking the wind out of himself, but not caring because Cas was in his arms. “I love your heart.”

He stood, turning to face him and wrapping his arms around Dean’s neck. “And my heart loves you, which is likely one of the cheesiest things I’ve ever said. I’m sure the next five minutes are going to be unbearable for you.” Cas smiled softly, planting a lingering kiss to his lips. 

“Yeah?” Dean kissed him again... and again... and again until they were breathless, completely forgetting where they were.

When Cas finally pulled back, his lips were gorgeously puffy. “Okay… the  _ next  _ five minutes. Switch me.” He moved out of reach temporarily, so Dean took a seat and let Cas slowly start to move him. “Where to start? I could tell you about the first time that I was jealous because of you. It was right after high school, believe it or not. We’d just moved in together, and I could hear your…  _ companion _ at the time through the wall. Do you remember how thin those walls in our first apartment were? It was ridiculous. I could hear just about every time you made her gasp, and it took me a minute to realize that I wanted that to be  _ me,  _ not her. But, we’d been at the bar that night and I wasn’t exactly sober, so I blamed it on the booze and tried not to look too closely at that again.” 

Dean wasn’t allowed to say anything until Cas was done, but he wanted to.  _ My first time getting jealous was  _ **_in_ ** _ high school, but you don’t need to know that story. _

“Or,” Cas continued. “Did you know that I told Charlie I was in love with you on my birthday? She’d been the one I’d gushed all the dirty details to when you and I started taking things further.” He pushed Dean a little higher, letting him swing on his own for a few passes and then helping him forward again. “It was right after the date where we covered each other in pie filling and had sex on the kitchen floor. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that what I felt for you wasn’t just lust, it was love… and I was afraid I was alone. But you never made me feel like that.” 

The timer dinged just as Cas started to explain the kink he’d developed for dirty hands, and Dean stopped the swing and stood. “We should do this again, I wanna know more of your secrets,” he teased, pulling him in for a soft kiss. “I think I knew I was in love then, too.”

“I’ll tell you all my secrets, you just have to ask. We don’t need a swing set.” Cas grinned, then tugged him back over to the car. “I’d very much like to dance with you now. It’s getting dark.”

“Any song in mind, or just a mixtape?” Dean climbed in the front seat to turn on the headlights and radio, and when Cas said he didn’t have a preference, Dean threw on the mixtape he made for Cas a long time ago. 

Thankfully, Baby’s headlights were low, so they stayed close to the hood as they danced with Cas’ head on Dean’s chest. “This was a good choice,” Cas whispered. “All of it.”

“I couldn’t agree more.” Dean spun Cas in a circle and pulled him back in. “You were the best choice I ever made.”

“You are absolutely mine, too.” Cas placed a soft kiss to the hollow of his throat and held on tighter, like he was truly afraid to let go. “I don’t want us to fight again. I know, logically, that it’s inevitable… but that was horrible.”

“It was... I don’t want that either. Just tell me when I’m bein’ an asshole and I’ll work on it, ‘kay?”

Cas nodded. “And just… punch me if I’m misunderstanding something. It happens. A lot.” They continued to sway, but Cas tipped his head back and pursed his lips, and Dean smiled before leaning in to kiss him. 

Dean kissed him with a chuckle. “I’d never punch you, but you can punch me all you want. I definitely deserve it.”

“We’ll see.” Cas pulled back with a playful expression and grabbed the bottle of liquor from the trunk. “Look up.”

Dean glanced at the stars and then patted Baby’s hood. “Get comfy, let’s do this.” He loved doing things like that with Cas, and from the look on that adorable face, so did he. 

It took a moment for them to both get situated, and Dean threw an arm over Cas’ shoulders. “Well,” Cas said. “This seems like a good time to dish about more secrets… do you have any?”

“Uh...”  _ Hell no... maybe. _ “I dunno...” Dean took a long drink, trying to think of anything  _ but  _ ‘I wanna marry you’. “Do you remember our first Halloween party? When you wore those tight white pants? I think we were like eighteen.”

Cas hummed an affirmative. “Of course, how could I forget?” 

“Well that was the day it hit me that I absolutely 100% wanted to fuck you in the ass. I hadn’t even fucked a dude yet, but I wanted to fuck you. I had jacked off and thought of you a couple times but never thought too deep into it you know? But no, I remember the moment vividly. You bent over to pick up a cherry you dropped when making a drink. I froze mid bite with my eyes locked on your perfect ass and it hit me like a damn slap in the face. I dunno if you remember but I was in my room like half the night after that. I couldn’t even look at you for a while without poppin’ a boner.” Dean was blushing hard at the admission. “I swear I was a thirteen year old boy for like two weeks.”

“I’d have let you, you know.” Cas’ voice was quiet, like that admission was almost as hard for him as Dean’s had been. “I dropped the cherry on purpose, I… still thought then that there was a chance you and I could be something more. But when you disappeared that night, I assumed you were with someone else. I gave up hoping you’d ever see me as anything more than a friend, and  _ thought  _ I was okay with it.”

“Shit. M’sorry. I was a damn coward, but I’ll make it up to you. You should know tho, I came in like two pumps that night.”

That drew a laugh from Cas. “You weren’t a coward. I could’ve been more straightforward, but I wasn’t very confident back then. And I’ve always thought you were out of my league.”

“Right back at ya. Okay one more secret from me and then it’s your turn. Remember Sam’s 21st birthday? When I got so hammered no one knew where I went and thought I died?”

He laughed more bitterly this time. “Yes, I do. I was worried sick.”

“Okay, so I admitted to Sam that I wanted to fuck you that night, and he said he was gonna tell you. The second he reached you, I hardcore bailed. I didn’t even know where I was, and had to find my way through alleyways and shit. I don’t remember most of the walk, but I woke up in some chick’s droptop. She said she almost called the cops on me, but thought I was hot, so she made me breakfast instead. It was a weird night.”

“He never did tell me.” Cas sighed, curling a little closer to Dean on the hood. “Seems like we could’ve been doing this a long time ago, but maybe it’s better that we didn’t. I know back in those days you weren’t looking for any type of commitment, and I’d have died if we slept together and you moved on to someone else. I feel like from the day we met, I was teetering on some sort of tightrope. I just… didn’t realize it until that pie date and I fell off of it entirely.”

“Yeah... I think we came together at the right time. I would have broken your heart and then lived with regret my whole life, always thinkin’ of the one that got away. But we’re here now, and solid.” Dean kissed his forehead. “Your turn. Gimme a secret.”

“Okay.” Cas squirmed slightly, humming as he thought about it. “Do you remember in our first apartment, when you got really sick with pneumonia? I… slept outside of your door every night until you got better, so I could hear you if you needed me.” His nose brushed against Dean’s chest and then disappeared into his armpit. “You kept asking me why I looked so tired, and I blamed it on school.” 

Dean paused, not sure how to respond. Once again, all he could think about was proposing then and there. “That’s... the nicest shit anyone’s ever done for me, Cas. I feel like an ass for talking about jackin’ off now, but seriously... thank you. Thank you for always bein’ there. No matter what.” His heart swelled in his chest, and all he could do was roll Cas onto his back and kiss him.

“Hey,” Cas mumbled between kisses. “Don’t feel bad about that, I just… didn’t have a similar story. For the most part, I forbid myself from fantasizing about you. Even then, I knew that even the made-up version of you would be better than anything I had in real life.”

Dean nodded, staring into those blues and allowing himself to get lost in them. “Have I ever told you how much I love your eyes? I know I joke and say they’re beautiful, but... beautiful doesn’t even do them justice. If I only saw these eyes for the rest of my life... I’d be happy.”

“That’s very sweet. I feel the same, you know. Not only about your eyes, but about every part of you.” Cas kissed him sweetly and then shivered from the cold, so Dean covered him as best as he could. “We already started discussing your hands. I never cared much about hands before I met you, but even back in high school, I had a little thing for them. And now, when you come home dirty from work?”  _ That  _ shiver probably had nothing to do with the cold. “I started having dinner ready earlier so you’d need to eat before showering, and now that I know what those hands actually look  _ and  _ feel like on my body, it’s hard for me to even glance at them without wanting you.”

Dean was smiling proudly and reached down to tickle Cas’ inner thigh, making him open them so Dean could slide between them. “They’re all yours.“

“Then let's go home, start the fire, and forget we even own clothes.”

“Ima m—” Dean caught himself,  _ holy shit I almost said it! _ “—ake you some hot chocolate when we get there.”  _ Fuckin’ smooth save, Dean. _ “Let’s go.” 

He hopped off before Cas could question his blush, even in the dark he was sure he looked like a tomato. They drove home hand in hand, singing along to some Pink Floyd. Dean never particularly cared for them but he knew Cas did, so he made sure he always had at least one cassette in the car for him.

When they pulled into the garage, it took them forever to actually get inside and get their clothes off — they couldn’t keep their hands off each other. Cas draped himself over Dean’s back and kissed every inch of skin he could reach as Dean lit the fire, and only then were they able to actually collapse onto their makeshift bed and take what they wanted. 

They opted for frottage — much too impatient to worry about prep — and by the time Cas’ big, soft hand was wrapped around their lengths, Dean was a moaning, writhing mess. “Cas… Fuck, baby. I love your hands. Fucking made for my cock.”

“Funny, we’d been talking about how much I loved  _ your  _ hands…” 

When Cas leaned down to suck a hickey on his neck, Dean began rutting up, thrusting into that gorgeous palm as he chased his release... but the fucker edged him. “C’mon!” Dean growled, teetering on the edge.

“Not yet.” Cas slowly rubbed his thumb over Dean’s leaking tip and squeezed, licking the objections from Dean’s mouth. “I want to hear you beg for it, tell me how much you want it.”

_ Ah hell… I’m not gonna beg…Fuck… Yes, I am.  _ “Please, sweetheart… please. Ah, fu—” Cas took mercy on him, working their cocks feverishly and bringing his left hand to Dean’s throat. The second he squeezed, Dean came so hard he saw stars. His spend leaked between Cas’ fingers and the obscene noises the come-slicked strokes were making sent Cas over right behind him. 

They panted together with Cas’ hand still wrapped around their softening lengths, both of their eyes glued on Dean’s come covered torso. “Think we should hop in the shower?” 

“Shit,” Cas gasped. “I’d rather not move, but yes, I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. Come on.” 

Relying on each other for support, they made their way up to Cas’ shower and cleaned each other off, surprisingly not wasting a lot of time. Once they were dry, Cas got them some water and snacks while Dean fed the fire. They collapsed together again, all tangled limbs and unhurried kisses. 

Cas settled in with his face buried in Dean’s chest. “Better now?”

“Yeah, sweetheart.” Dean said. “All better.”


	31. Baby

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In honor of one of my all-time favorite episodes. Enjoy!

**Castiel**

“I still can’t believe you’re actually wearing that.” Cas shook his head, disregarding his own outfit hidden under a blanket. The car, that glorious, beautiful car, rumbled underneath them and complemented Dean’s laughter. “A  _ fanny  _ pack, Dean? Really?”

With a look that screamed mock offense, Dean held a hand to his chest. “It’s a fashion statement,  _ honey.  _ The book specifically said we had to, I’m just doin’ what I’m told.”

Grumbling, Cas hiked the blanket up a little too far, then grimaced when the movement uncovered his atrocious socks-and-sandals look. They were supposed to be tourists visiting their own city, dressing and acting the part as much as possible. “We look like idiots, and this is the last straw. I’m writing a letter to the people that created this book demanding to know why they seem intent on embarrassing us to death.”

“C’mon, Castiel,” Jask chimed in from the back. “It’s supposed to be funny, I don’t think it was meant to embarrass anyone. Besides, Dean looks damn good in those khaki dad shorts. If you don’t want him, we’ll take him.” Ares smacked him which only made Jask laugh harder, but Cas wasn’t as amused. 

“At some point, I’m going to start making jokes like that about Ares. See how  _ you  _ like it.” He wasn’t serious, and as he discussed with Dean long ago, Jaskier would be the one he picked, anyway. Apparently, he had a thing for big, beefy, adorable morons. That thought alone had him squirming on the leather seat — but not because of Jask, because of Dean. Tucked in his pocket was the last of his date-night currencies, this one, for public sex in the Impala. The plan was to eventually ditch Jask and Ares at one of the tourist traps and make good use of the contents of his  _ own  _ cargo shorts, provided none of them froze to death first. 

The daydreaming meant he was blissfully unaware of the conversation that followed, and spent the rest of the drive staring out Baby’s windshield and admiring the way the sun glistened off the paint. Maybe he paid a little extra attention than normal to the way Dean’s body language relaxed the more he opened Baby up, but it wasn’t Cas’ fault. Dean was exquisite even at the worst of times, but here? In his car, surrounded by people he loved, on the open road? There were almost no words to describe it.

When they arrived at the first spot, Cas took a deep breath and was the last to get out, as not one part of him was prepared for the looks the four of them were sure to draw.  _ This… is going to be a day to remember. For better… or much more likely, worse. _

~~~~

The car doors shut gently as they piled back in two hours later, frozen solid but laughing. Dean started the engine and cranked the heat, and Cas rubbed his hands together in front of the heater vents in an attempt to keep warm. “Are we going to talk about the fact that you two probably just made national news with the stunt you pulled at the fountain?”

“Aww, Cas. It was funny, and I’m sure that dusty old colonel statue was glad for a little action.” Jask reached forward to ruffle his hair as Dean pulled the car back onto the road, and Cas swatted him away. 

“You  _ humped  _ a national monument. In front of a camera crew. You’re lucky we weren’t all arrested… They probably thought you were insane.”

“Woulda been kinda funny if we  _ did _ get arrested though, imagine the police report.” Dean’s laugh was overshadowed by Jaskier’s obnoxious cackle. 

Ares leaned forward. “Look, I found this website where you can start petitions for your local area. Let’s start one to kick these idiots out of town, Cas.”

“Sounds too good to be true, where do I sign?” Cas deadpanned. As much as he loved Dean, he was afraid he’d never get the visual of him and Jaskier trying to double team a statue out of his mind. 

Dean pouted and grabbed Cas’ hand. “You’d just follow me outta town, huh?”

With a failed attempt at hiding his smile, Cas tilted his head. “Who said anything about following you out? I can’t be associated with a…” He trailed off at the absolutely pathetic look on Dean’s face and launched himself across the seat, kissing his face about a dozen times. “I was kidding, I’d follow you anywhere… even if I  _ was  _ the one to get you kicked out in the first place.”

“Good.” Dean pulled into the restaurant they had a stranger suggest, and then put her in park. “I’d follow you anywhere, too.” He leaned over and kissed him heatedly, ignoring J’s comments as he practically climbed into Cas’ lap.

_ Now I don’t want to go in… maybe ever. Dinner can wait.  _ Cas slid his hands up Dean’s back until he was gripping his broad shoulders and holding him down, content to keep kissing him until the sun set the following evening. 

“Come on,” Ares chided. “We need to go or we’ll miss our reservation.” 

“Whatever,” Cas sighed, but smiled. “Can’t wait to see what happens next.”

~~~~

At least now, Cas had some food in his stomach, but he’d had to bodily shove Jask out of the way to retain his shotgun position when they left the restaurant. There was no way he was going to be demoted to the back seat, at least not until he was good and ready to be back there. Quietly, he flipped through the photos he’d had a stranger take on his phone.  _ We look absolutely ridiculous. But my gods, do we all look happy.  _ Cas’ cheeks flushed and Dean reached over to take his hand, smiling fondly at him. “You okay, sweetheart?”

“Yes,” Cas nodded, “I think I am.” He was cold and tired from walking, but he’d be doing everyone a disservice if he didn’t admit to himself that he was actually having fun. 

Dean swapped out the cassette tape and held up a finger to silence everyone as the music started, and Cas’ grin immediately grew. 

_ Dun dun dun dun, dun dun dun dun, dun dun dun — dun dun dun, dun dun, dun dun, dun dun — dun dun dun.  _ “I was a little too tall, coulda used a few pounds,” Dean sang, smiling over at him. “Tight pants, points, hardly renowned. He was a black haired beauty with big blue eyes, and points all his own, sittin’ way up high.” 

Jask catcalled from the backseat at Dean’s lyric swap, and Cas’ chest filled with love as he laced his fingers with his boyfriend’s and shook his head. “Don’t  _ Night Moves  _ me.”  _ Please Night Moves me. Don’t stop, don’t ever stop.  _

“Out past the cornfields where the woods got heavy, out in the backseat of my ‘67 Chevy.” Dean winked, and all of them joined in. “Workin’ on mysteries without any clues… workin’ on our night moves.” 

The trees passed quickly as Dean chased the sunset, and Cas was reminded not for the first time why  _ everyone  _ loved that car so much. He wondered if the original owner of the car — some alcoholic with two ex-wives and three blocked arteries named Sal Moriarty — ever enjoyed her simple, sleek beauty as much as they did, or if he knew that the vehicle he used to drive around passing out Bibles on weekends was about to be used for something nearly blasphemous in nature. Part of Cas hoped he did, he hoped the whole world knew the plans he had for that car, and its equally beautiful driver.  _ One more stop, just one more. Now or never.  _

~~~~

Cas winced as he got back to the car, holding Baby’s keys. Opening himself up in a public restroom proved to be both difficult  _ and  _ nerve-wracking, but he had pretty high hopes that it was going to be worth it. He climbed into the backseat, thankful for the early nights of late November, and shucked off his shorts before calling Dean, who was still inside the little boardwalk arcade. It was the off-season, and they’d been surprised the thing was even open — but Cas couldn’t help but notice that things had a funny way of working out for him as of late. 

“Cas, you’ve been gone forever. How long does it take to grab a wallet? You okay?”

Swallowing, Cas braced himself. “I can’t find it, it’s too dark. Will you come help me look? It must’ve fallen out of one of my  _ many _ unnecessary pockets.”

“You’re lucky you have your looks.” Dean chuckled and hung up the phone, walking out a few moments later. He started dancing to a tune Cas couldn’t hear and he couldn’t help but laugh when Dean jumped to the side and clicked his feet together.

_ What an idiot… at least he’s  _ **_my_ ** _ idiot.  _ Cas licked his lip, nervous suddenly that they were so out in the open. Thankfully, the sun had already set pretty thoroughly and there weren’t any streetlights close enough to illuminate the car.  _ If we get arrested now, it’ll be my fault, not his.  _ Cas opened the back door in invitation but left it mostly shut, hoping Dean would get the memo. 

Dean opened it and instantly climbed inside. “So fucking on board for this, sweetheart.”

“Good, then take off those atrocious shorts.” Cas was completely naked, thankful more than ever for Baby’s heater. He stroked himself slowly, reaching down with his other hand to tug on his own balls. “I prepped for you. I’m cashing in the public Impala sex currency. I need you, Dean.”

“I’d do this for free, baby.” Dean leaned down and licked some precome off of his cock, then shimmied out of his shorts. “Leavin’ these socks on, though.” He winked and did a gimme motion with his hands after getting comfortable. “C’mere, baby.”

Cas couldn’t argue with him leaving the socks on, the heat didn’t quite reach the floor of the backseat. With a quick glance around them, Cas flipped to straddle Dean and reached behind him to stroke him slowly. “I’ve been thinking about this since last night, I’ve been dying for it all day. Dying for  _ you _ .”

Dean whimpered and leaned forward to kiss down Cas’ neck and chest, pulling his nipple between his teeth. “It’s all yours, Cas. You can have me anytime, anywhere. I always want you, always crave you.”

He believed it with every fiber of his being. “Fuck me, Dean. Lube is next to you.” Cas rocked down, glad he hadn’t bothered with a plug — he needed Dean  _ now.  _

Dean grabbed the lube and squirted an excessive amount onto his fingers, cursing when it slid down his hand. He nudged a couple fingers inside Cas and slicked his cock, lining up and guiding him down onto his lap. Dean moaned Cas’ name, his eyes closed tightly at the stretch. “So tight, sweetheart.”

“Shit, so big, Dean. I’ll never get over how full you make me feel.” Cas gripped the seat behind Dean’s head and slowly rolled his hips in a circle to take him deeper, his own cock rubbing against Dean’s chest. 

Dean groaned, thrusting up slightly and pulling Cas down by his hair for a kiss. Cas thrusted forward, feeling Dean move inside him as his cock slid across Dean’s stomach. He grabbed both of Dean’s hands and pinned them above their heads, leaning down to kiss him hungrily. 

“Ah, fuck yeah... You’re so fucking hot, Cas.” Dean groaned and started fucking up into him, hitting that perfect spot and causing Cas to get a little louder. 

They moved together until Cas was right there, desperate for friction but denying himself over and over again. “Fuck, hard— harder, I’m so — don't stop —”

Dean growled, as if stopping was the most evil thing he’d ever heard, and he continued pounding up into Cas’ prostate. “Fu— Cas... gon—”

Even the thought of Dean filling him up was enough to tip the scale, and Cas let out a laugh that sounded a lot like a sob as he fucked himself harder on Dean’s cock, coming with erratic spurts all over Dean. “Please, Dean! Come inside me. Mark me, make me yours.”

Dean stared down at the mess with his mouth agape. He looked completely fucked out as he slammed inside one last time, groaning so loud it echoed throughout the parking lot. He filled Cas’ tight hole and then grabbed Cas’ chin, pulling him in for a sloppy kiss.

Cas could’ve stayed there forever, rolling his hips to milk Dean dry and swallowing every sound he made, but they were supposed to be inside. Cas dropped his head down and let out a breath, his thighs shaking. “Jask and Ares…”

“Who? Don’t know anyone by those names.” Dean leaned in to suck a hickey on Cas’ neck, and for a few, glorious moments, Cas couldn’t remember who they were, either. 

But, as Cas became a little more aware of their surroundings, he realized people kept walking right past them. He hated the thought of moving, of Dean’s soft cock slipping out of his ass, but knew it needed to happen. He kissed Dean one more time, fisting a hand in his hair as he slowly slid off, shivering when he felt the come slicking down over his thighs. 

“Come on,” Cas gasped. “Let’s go back inside.” 

~~~~

When they climbed into Baby for the last time that night, Cas felt a little odd. Technically, this had been their final date before the official end of the book, which consisted of two mystery finale dates. As ready as Cas was to dive into his paper and be able to date Dean properly, he was also a little worried the book had set some sort of precedent he’d never be able to keep up with.  _ Will Dean always expect our dates to be this adventurous? I’m afraid I’m not this creative, nor this adventurous on my own; and if I’m being truthful, I’d have begged him to skip half of these dates if it wasn’t for a project.  _

The engine hummed, and Dean tapped his fingers on the steering wheel lightly to whatever rock ballad was on the radio. Cas glanced at the back seat to see Jask and Ares curled up together and sleeping. “Did you have fun today?”

“Hell yeah, especially that last place.” He winked at Cas, letting him know it had nothing to do with the arcade. “I always have fun with you, Cas. Always.” Dean kissed his hand softly.

Cas hummed and laced their fingers, pulling Dean’s hand into his lap. “It didn’t turn out as horribly as I thought it would, that’s for sure.” He could hear Jask snoring quietly, and for once it didn’t bother him. “It seemed like they had fun, too.”

“I dunno how Ares puts up with that bear.” Dean looked back at them and shook his head. “So... how’d you like my fanny pack?” He wiggled his eyebrows. “Reach inside... I packed somethin’ for your... fanny.”

Frowning slightly, Cas reached over to unzip it and dig around. “What am I looking for? And why is this so big?”

Dean rolled his eyes. “It was a joke. It was supposed to be my dick but I never got a chance to say the joke until now and Seger’s already tapped out, so... never mind. Forget the joke.”

Thankfully, the darkness surrounding them did a pretty thorough job of hiding his blush. “Oh. I absolutely should’ve seen that coming.” He chuckled, a little embarrassed and a little amused. “Will you still tell me jokes you know I won’t get when we’re a hundred and two?”

“Of course, they’ll be just as inappropriate though, so be prepared. You won’t be able to take me anywhere when I’m old and give even less fucks than I do now.” Dean laughed at himself and smiled cheekily at Cas. “Bet you still love me.”

“I’ll absolutely still love you, but I’ll probably smack you with my cane. I hope your knees can withstand the abuse your mouth will bring about.” Cas raised a single eyebrow in an attempt to be serious, but the thought of growing old with Dean was making not smiling extremely difficult. 

“Hey, remember that time I was on my knees for an hour, cockwarming while you studied? My knees are plenty strong.”

Cas squirmed, heat rushing to his core. “Then maybe we should do that more often. You know, to… keep their strength up.” 

“I agree. I’ll cockwarm while you write the paper. You know it’s basically gonna be a love novel now right?  _ The Tales of Our Love, A DeanCas Story.  _ No,wait...  _ A Destiel Story.” _ Dean winked, looking much too proud of himself for coming up with a title that would never be used... ever.

“There is absolutely no way I’m going to call it that.” Cas shook his head with a fond smile, then added, “Wouldn’t it be Deastiel, anyway?”

“No. For one... gross. And for two, it’s a play on destiny, Cas... like, we’re each other’s destiny. You know, one day — probably after I die — you’re gonna miss all my cheesy, witty crap.”

Not one part of him doubted it, but he had absolutely no interest in thinking about Dean dying, so he shut him up with a quick kiss and then turned the radio up. They drove the rest of the way home hand in hand, and Cas had to give Dean props — he’d have fallen asleep at the wheel a while ago.

When they pulled into the garage, Dean reached over the back of the bench seat and punched Jask in the thigh. He woke with a yell, flailing enough that Ares was jostled off of him looking irritated. “Damnit, Jaskier.  _ Elbows.” _

“I’ll give you ‘elbows’,” he grunted, grabbing Ares’ chin and kissing him hard, then opened his door and more or less fell out. Ares chuckled, winking at Dean and Cas. 

“See you guys later, thanks for yet another adventure.” Ares ducked out of the car and hauled Jask to his feet, then half carried him across the way to their own house. 

Cas watched through the back window to make sure they got in okay, then curled his leg up on the seat and faced Dean. “I don’t think I’m ready to get out.”

“No? Aren’t you cold?” Dean scooted to the middle and tapped his lap for Cas to climb on. He did, without hesitation, and slid his arms behind Dean’s back just above his ass. 

“This was our last date before the finale. It just feels… strange, and I’m not sure I’m ready for it to be over. I realistically know nothing will change, but…. I can’t shake the fear that when the project ends, I’m going to turn back into a pumpkin.” 

“The cutest pumpkin in all the land, eh?” Cas couldn’t pinpoint the accent, and by the look on Dean’s face, he couldn’t either. “I dunno what that was, but nothin’ will change. There just won’t be a book telin’ us how to date. I’m sure I’ll still embarrass you once a week.”

He chuckled softly, burying his face in Dean’s neck and planting a soft kiss on his skin. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Dean hummed and bared his neck, his hands running down Cas’ back. “Let’s go inside. You’re cold and I want to spoon you next to the fire.”

That sounded wonderful, and Cas couldn’t complain. “You’re right, it’s late, and if I don’t take these sandals off soon, I’m going to lose all the street cred I’ve worked so hard to build up.” Cas slid off him and folded the blanket with a small smile as Dean laughed himself silly. “Stop it, it’s not funny.” 

“Of course it’s not, sweetheart.” Dean snorted, still snickering as he pressed a long kiss to Cas’ forehead. “You’ve absolutely got street cred with me.” He ducked out of the car and headed inside, leaving Cas pursing his lips to hide his smile.  _ He’s so cute when he lies to me.  _

Cas grabbed the rest of their things and took a moment at the door to look back at the car. “Until next time?” 

And maybe he imagined it, or maybe it was just the exhaustion tugging at him from such a long day, but as he flipped off the light to head in, he could’ve sworn that Baby winked. 


	32. The Monster at the End of this Book

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end of the actual "Adventure Challenge" book is sort of a bizarre lip syncing battle, which just didn't seem right to me. So, like quite a few other times during this... I improvised, and this is what came out of my brain. 
> 
> Enjoy.

**Dean**

Getting to the end of the book was surreal. When he agreed to this project, he hadn’t really expected they’d do all fifty of them. He figured Cas would tap out of the whole _fake_ dating thing halfway through, but instead… they’d started _real_ dating. 

He’d truly never been happier. When he made his way downstairs, Cas was sitting at the table with a cup of joe under his nose, staring intently at the Pathokinesis book as if it might burst into flames.

“Mornin’, darlin’,” Dean drawled, knowing Cas loved his lazy morning accent.

A soft, reluctant smile played across his lips. “Mm. Again, say it again.” Cas sipped his coffee slowly as Dean repeated his greeting, and the second he set the mug down, Dean swooped in for a kiss. That seemed to wake his boyfriend up a little more, and he tapped the book with one finger. “Dean, this is it. The last one. Well, two. Are you ready?”

“Yup. M’ready. Are you ready?” Dean played with Cas’ hair and leaned down to sniff it, humming at how amazing he smelled. “Let’s scratch ‘em, baby.”

With his tongue adorably pressed between his teeth, Cas huffed through his nose and scratched the first half of the finale date. He read over it quickly, then pushed the book toward Dean. “We need to plan and then execute a murder mystery party.” 

Dean knew it would take a lot of planning, but he was excited. “Hell yeah, we do. Where’s our Scooby?” He whistled for Havoc and reached down to pick him up. “Let’s do this, Daphne.”

“While I’m flattered, I think we both know I’m Velma.” Cas rolled his eyes with a smile and sat back, licking his lips in concentration. “I have… absolutely no idea how to go about this. Do you think we can just rent out one of those places? Like an escape room or something?”

“Probably.” He pulled out his phone to Google around. “I’m way too fucking excited for this.” 

They finished their breakfast and made their way to the couch, both of their faces glued to screens. It took a while, but Dean came across an old bank that sounded exactly like what they were looking for. “Check this out. You can solve mysteries to make it to different vaults in this creepy old bank.” He handed Cas the phone.

“Sounds like what we need. We need a group of ten, though.” His eyes continued to flick down the screen. “And someone to make sure no one cheats. I bet my father would do it, he’s been home for a couple of weeks now.”

“Yeah, he’d probably love that. We can pick him up on the way. You think... Jimmy would wanna come? They’re probably both needing a break from the baby.”

Cas nodded, smiling. “I think that would be nice. Let’s book it and I’ll let everyone know?”

“You got it. And by the way, you’re hotter than Daphne.” Dean kissed Cas’ cheek and hit the call button, not at all surprised to find out renting a bank for a few hours would be a couple hundred bucks, but he knew it would be worth it. _Especially if he says yes…_

**Castiel**

“Why, exactly, are you splitting me and Dean up?” Cas sidestepped closer to Dean, not wanting to deal with anything involving murder without him, not even a game. 

Jagger chuckled softly. “I don’t make the rules, I’m just here to enforce them.” He stepped forward slowly, bearing most of his weight on a cane, and handed Jimmy a stack of folders. “You start here. The doors to the bank won’t open again until you’ve found your killer… and taken him, or her, out.” He raised his eyebrows suggestively and backed up again, heading for the only exit to the room they were in. 

Straight ahead were two vault doors, one with a sign that read “Who?” and another that read “How?”. Cas walked over to meet up with the others, who were all already pouring over the files. 

Dean started kissing along his neck and then put a protective arm around him. “Any of you even think about fake killing my wife, I’ll kill every single one of you. Got it?”

“If he’s the killer, I’m not making any promises,” Jask quipped. “But will you shut up about how much you love each other and actually put yourselves to good use? We got six different case files, all bank robberies and murders, all different perps. I don’t see how any of this helps.”

Charlie bounded over to snatch one of the files. “Obviously we have to go through the doors, find some clues, then work together to figure it out. That’s how these things work.” She ignored the mocking expression on Jask’s face, then handed three files to each team. “Dean, you guys should figure out the ‘How’, and we’ll figure out ‘Who.’ Sound good?”

“Yeah, we got this.” He kissed Cas’ cheek and took the files, his demeanor quickly shifted to business mode and he stared down at the open folder while rubbing his chin.

Ares bumped Cas’ arm with a chuckle. “Take a picture, why don’t you?” he teased.

Blushing from getting caught staring, Cas grabbed his team’s files and headed for the ‘Who’ door. “Just shut up and come on. We have a mystery to solve.”

**Dean**

“Alright. Think we can beat the nerd bunch over there?” Dean asked with a playful grin.

Jask huffed a laugh. “You know that room has all the smart people, right?”

“Hey!” Madison piped up and slapped J’s arm. “I’m pretty damn smart, give me a file.” She snatched one and started studying it. 

“We can argue all day, but those asshats are all nerds… especially your boyfriend.” Dean ruffled her hair, earning himself a slap. She knew better than to argue, though; Sam read a new book every week. 

Dean wasn’t sure how he got stuck with Matt, but Jagger picked the damn teams so he couldn’t make a scene. _Especially_ not tonight. Tonight had to be perfect. 

“Look!” Matt walked over toward an old lockbox and popped it open. 

_That’s way too easy._ Dean took it upon himself to walk over and take the paper from his fingers. “It’s a friggin riddle.” 

_This is a type of color_

_But it's not green or blue_

_You’ll need this type of bullet_

_If a werewolf’s after you_

Jimmy read it out loud for everyone, but Dean instantly assumed it was a werewolf. “I don’t think so, Dean. Why would they put the answer in the very first clue?”

“Right. Okay, so what type of bullet do —”

“Silver!” Madison yelled excitedly. “Silver bullets kill werewolves, and a lot of other monsters, too.”

_Click!_

The door unlocked and Madison looked ridiculously proud of herself. “See… you think Sam would have chosen someone dumb?”

“Never said you were dumb, Maddy. But alright alright, you got that one for us, let’s check out this next room. I helped, though.”

“Sure, Dean. Sure,” Jask had the nerve to say, like he did _anything_ to help the process. 

_Is that…_ “A cookie? Where the hell did you find food?” Dean walked over and tried to take the snack.

“Get your own. If you would have looked around, you’d see that there are other boxes, dummy. That one has cookies… or had. I ate them all while you guys did all the work.” Jask popped the last bite in his mouth and grinned, walking away toward the next room.

**Castiel**

The first ‘Who’ vault was creepy, to say the least. It was lined with articles about missing people, unexplained mysteries, and UFO sightings. Cas shivered as he looked at some of the artwork covering the walls, content to let Ares, Sam, Charlie, and Ophelia handle whatever was on the center table. 

“There are four riddles here. Great, brain games,” Ophelia laughed. “Just what I wanted on my first day off from the baby.”

Sam clicked his tongue and picked up the first one. “‘If you are in a creepy house, and hear an unusual sound, it might be this apparition, who can be seen floating around’. What is that, like a ghost?”

“I think that’s exactly what it is.” Cas wandered back over and slid the second riddle toward himself. 

_When this caped being is flying around_

_You might want to hit the deck_

_And beware of all those long, sharp teeth_

_That he’ll sink into your neck_

He frowned, flipping the page over. “So, we’re searching for Dracula’s ghost? What’s the third?”

Charlie stood on her toes to steal the next riddle from Sam. “My turn! ‘You might find one on a broomstick, or boiling eye of newt. One of them made Snow White sick, by giving her poisoned fruit.’ Well, that’s easy enough, but a witch kind of throws the whole ‘ghost of Dracula’ thing out the window.” 

“The last one is easy,” Ophelia said. “‘If you see this when there’s a full moon, there’s a good chance you’ll feel fear. Unless you are part of Team Jacob, in which case you’ll want to get near.”

_For fuck’s sake, am I ever going to get away from Twilight?_ Cas rolled his eyes heavily, crossing his arms. “Werewolf. So, that leaves us with a ghost, a vampire, a witch, and a werewolf.”

“Sounds like the start of a bar joke, honestly.” Sam pulled them all together and braced his palms on the table. “That’s it, right? We solved all four, why isn’t the vault door opening?”

Cas shook his head. “I don’t know, but maybe it’s not that simple? Maybe they’re part of a larger riddle that we haven’t worked out yet. What do they all have in common?”

“They’re all spooky?” Ophelia offered. Everyone stared at the door, and when nothing happened, she tried again. “Scary?”

Nothing.

“Halloween?”

No change. 

“They’re monsters?”

_Click._

“Awesome,” Ares said. “So we’re dealing with a monster. Let’s go see what room number two has to offer.”

**Dean**

Dean was still giving J the stink eye when they looked around the second vault. This one had bookshelves with hundreds of old-looking books lining the walls. _Yeah, perfectly normal bank vault. Alright, fuck the bullshit. Where are the damn cookies?_ Dean walked around while the others approached the very obvious clue box. 

“This one is harder to open.” Jimmy attempted to pull the top open and frowned. 

“Punch it.” Dean joked. “You hit pretty hard for a nerdy dude in a trenchcoat.”

Jimmy rolled his eyes, but offered a small smile. They never did talk about that whole ordeal beyond him apologizing, but they didn’t have to. 

Dean stopped paying attention when Jask took the box and became Mr. Macho with the top, and found himself another box. _C’mon… be cookies… ugh. Fucking bottled water. Fuck this, pie is better than cookies anyway._

He looked back at the group just as Jask opened up the box, and Matt caught the paper that floated out. “Okay, here we go.”

_There is a man who is locked in a room_

_with nothing but a bed and a calendar,_

_and the question is: How does he survive?_

Dean huffed a laugh at all the puzzled faces. _Vonnegut, you uncultured swines._ He traveled along the books, looking for any and all Vonnegut books. _Cat’s Cradle, Breakfast of Champions, Slaughterhouse Five… I need to read that again, it’s been too damn long. Focus Dean… Mother Night, Silverbeard… what? Silverbeard? It’s Bluebeard! What kinda place is this —_ And then it hit him. Silver. _No shit, that is the damn answer to the last room._

Dean pulled the book out, instantly able to tell it wasn’t a real book. The others were still arguing over the clue and didn’t even notice when Dean pulled out the damn fake blade. The lock clicked again, and no one so much as glanced in his direction. 

“Hello, asshats.” Dean interrupted when Madison read the quote aloud one more time. “He eats dates from the calendar and drinks from the springs of the bed. Can we go now?” He swung the blade around to show them, and nodded toward the opened door, biting back a smug smile when they all looked surprised. “I know, I know, I’m awesome.”

**Castiel**

“It’s another riddle,” Ares said. “Just one this time though, so at least that’s something. Looks like it’s a little bit more difficult than the first ones were.”

They all gathered around him to read. 

_I am something, but yet I'm nothing._

_I am old, but young._

_I have thousands of bodies, but one mind._

_What am I?_

“The first thing that comes to mind is a beehive. Y’know, thousands of bodies, one mind? Like a play on hive mind?” 

Cas glared at her with all the love for his sister-in-law he could muster. “Bees are not monsters, Ophelia. Without bees, the entire world would crumble. And they’re not nothing, either.”

Laughing, Ares held up his hands like he was trying to separate them. “Okay, okay. Break it up, and let's take a step back.”

“It doesn’t make any sense.” Charlie started pacing, her brows pinched in concentration. “What _is_ something and nothing all at once?”

“Love?” Cas offered. “It’s something, obviously, but it can’t be quantified, proven, or seen… so it’s technically nothing, but something? It can also be considered both old and young… what was the last part again?”

Ophelia tapped the page. “The part about thousands of bodies and one mind. I guess love fits, at least abstractly. Do you think this is trying to get us to guess motive? It’s a monster in love?”

Since the door didn’t budge, Cas shook his head. “It has to be —”

“So get this,” Sam cut in, ignoring them altogether. “My dad used to tell us stories about monsters when we were kids. Vampires, wendigos, you name it. Anyway, this kind of reminds me of one of them. Think about it, we know we’re dealing with a monster, we know all the suspects for the bank robberies were different people. Or... looked like different people. ‘Thousands of bodies but one mind...’ I think it fits.”

Everyone stared at Sam, waiting for him to actually say the name. When he didn’t, Cas prodded, “What were the stories about?”

“Oh! Sorry, shapeshifters.” 

The door clicked open, and Ares ruffled Sam’s hair on the way out. “Adorable, really. Times like these I remember how it’s possible you and Dean are related.” They slipped out of the vault and found themselves in a bigger room, with one other vault door next to theirs, and a regular door across from them. There were a few computers and a television, none of which were on. 

“Do you think we’re supposed to wait for the others?” Charlie asked. 

That seemed as plausible as anything else, so Cas nodded as he took a seat. “You might want to get comfortable. As much faith as I have in them, we have no idea what they’re dealing with… we might be here for a while.” 

**Dean**

_Dammit! The nerds won!_ He smiled when he saw Cas, unable to help it, but then rolled his eyes at the rest of them. “These assholes would have been lost without me.” 

Madison huffed a laugh and walked up to Sam. “So, what are we dealing with? Dean has the weapon.”

Dean had already stored the blade in his jeans and shrugged when they all looked at him. “What? I’m not givin’ it up. Any of you fuckers could be the monster.”

“So could you,” Cas pointed out, walking over to kiss him quickly. “It’s a shapeshifter, but we weren’t given any clues how to figure out which one of us _was_ the shifter.”

Ares pointed to the computers and stepped back, letting Charlie sit down. “These look like security camera monitors, maybe there’s something here that’ll help us figure it out?” She started typing random letters, her fingers flying over the keys. “It’s locked, it’s going to take me a while to crack the password.”

“This isn’t Roman Enterprises, Chuckles. I doubt you have to be a master hacker and crack the password.” As if on cue, the television flipped on above their heads, revealing yet another fucking riddle. 

_This is something with a lid_

_But it’s not a coffee mug_

_It’s something with a socket_

_But it doesn’t have a plug_

“Sounds dirty,” Jask laughed, abruptly stopping when he saw the looks on everyone’s faces. “C’mon, don't even look at me like that. It’s eyes, I’m not an idiot. Sue me for having some fun.”

Dean gallic shrugged, because he definitely thought it was dirty for a split second there as well, and Charlie typed out ‘eyes’. The computer chimed to let them all know the password was correct, and then the screens lit up with the bank’s security footage.

They could see Jagger watching his own monitor, and then saw someone walk across another screen off to the side. Madison gasped and pointed at it. “I saw someone!” 

They followed the trail, and once the body reappeared in view, they zoomed in on a face... _Ares’_ face. They all turned to look for him, but he wasn’t there; the feed was live.

His eyes flared white after he blinked, and the grin he shot toward the camera would have been chilling if Dean didn’t already know it was all just a game. “Fucking knew it it was ol’ shifty eyes!” 

“Hey! Who the hell are you calling shifty eyes, dickweed!” Jask lunged at him like he was gonna try to get him in a headlock, but Dean sidestepped out of the way. 

“He was in a vault with my wife! Fuck that guy, I’m takin’ him out.” Dean brought out the blade and charged toward the open door.

**Castiel**

As much as Cas enjoyed watching Dean wrestle, he was extremely grateful he was choosing to behave. They had their villain, all they had to do now was catch him. They hurried out of the room back into the main part of the bank, then decided to split up to search for him. Cas quickly grabbed onto Dean. “Can I stay with you this time?” 

“Abso-friggin-lutely! I don’t trust any of these people anymore.” Dean walked in front protectively as they searched.

Sam had tagged along with his girlfriend glued to his arm. “Sam, I didn’t realize this would basically be a haunted house, you know I hate those.”

He kissed her head. “It’s okay, Maddy. Unless of course you’re the monster, in which case… it’ll hurt, but I won’t hesitate to kill you.”

Dean snorted at his brother, pulling Cas closer as Cas said, “Don’t worry, even if you _are_ the monster, I won’t kill you. I will, however, expect monster sex… which is yet another sentence I never thought I’d utter. I’ll give the book that much.”

“I’d just let you turn me, and we’d have monster sex all over this fucking state.” Dean slapped his ass and leaned in to nibble along his neck, sending shivers down Cas’ spine and making him gasp.

Sam scoffed. “Go figure he’s the one for you, Dean. No normal person would have thought of the monster sex that fast.”

“Hey, first of all, fuck normal. Second of all, you’re just jealous our sex is so good it’s _always_ the first thought. And third... I don’t gotta third. But yeah, he’s the only one for me.”

_And you’re the only one for me._ Cas rocked up to kiss the hollow of Dean’s neck and then pulled back, grabbing his hand and dragging him forward. “I love you and absolutely can’t wait to explore that whole ‘monster sex’ thing, but for now, we need to find Ares.”

They checked what seemed like the entire damn bank, then met back up with the others in the lobby. They exchanged shaken heads and confused looks, and Charlie walked around behind the counter. “Shit! Guys, come here!” 

Everyone hurried to crowd around her, and Cas gasped quietly when he saw what appeared to be Ares’ dead body. “That’s fake, right? This is fake? Who killed him, and why aren’t the doors open if we got him?”

**Dean**

Dean leaned down and nut-checked Ares, laughing when he jerked and covered his crotch. “He’s fine.”

“Asshole!” Ares chuckled. “I’m supposed to be dead!” He sat up and looked around. “You guys still need to find the killer. He shifted, dummies, that’s why I’m dead.” 

Dean gripped the fake blade and grinned. “Alright, so he shifted, naturally. And from one of the clues, they have to touch the person to take their form, right?” He didn’t wait for anyone to answer. “And there is only one person who woulda been dumb enough to get that damn close.” 

Dean turned and thrust the knife into J’s chest. “That would be... _Aquaman.”_

In all of his over-dramatic glory, Jask clutched the retractable blade to his chest and screamed like a little girl, spinning around in clumsy circles before falling to the ground in a heap. He stilled, then twitched. “Tell Ares I loved him! Such sweet sorrow… something… Fuck it, I don’t know Shakespeare.” Jask made a gagging noise and flattened out, his stupid tongue hanging out of the side of his mouth like a dog. 

Cas heaved a sigh nearly as over-the-top as Jask’s performance right as the doors to the lobby unlocked. “Who’s idea was it to invite him again?”

Dean thought it was damn hilarious but shrugged. “Dunno, he just shows up all the time.”

Ares covered his eyes in shame and then went to jump on Jask, but Dean stopped paying attention, he was suddenly very nervous. _No backin’ out now._

Jagger walked over and Dean took a deep breath. _Now or never... well, not never. Sure I could do this another time... fuck it._ He kneeled down on one knee and looked up at Cas’ father.

Everyone went silent as Dean tried to find his words. Everyone _except_ Cas. “Um… Dean? Why are you proposing to my father?”

Jagger glanced down at him with an amused expression, which wasn’t fucking helping. “I’d like to know that as well. It’s a little sudden, Dean…”

“I’m not... just... shh.” Dean cleared his throat, feeling like he might pass out and embarrass the hell out of himself. 

“D. You don’t get on your knee for this part,” Jask piped up, already knowing this was part of the plan.

“Zip it, dead boy. I’m already down here. Jagger, I’d like to ask your permission to propose to your son.” _Is that how this goes? Ah, hell, I shoulda Googled._

He beamed at Dean, folding both hands over the top of his cane and leaning down. “It’s about damn time, son. But you might want to get on with it, before Castiel follows in my footsteps and has a stroke.”

Dean awkwardly moved on his knees over to Cas, and then smiled up at his beautiful face. It was a mix of fear, shock, and embarrassment, but most of all… he looked like he might burst from happiness. _Hope that’s a good look._

“Uh... Castiel Novak. My sweetheart. The love of my life. I don’t ever want to spend a minute without you. You’re my favorite part of waking up... Will you do one more crazy thing with me and, uh... marry me? Please? Unless you think we shouldn’t, or if you think you can find someone with a better ass than me. Which would be surprising, I have a very nice a—”

“Dean, shut up,” Sam whispered harshly, snapping him out of it.

“Okay, Sam.” He gulped loud enough that it nearly echoed around the room, and then waited for his boyfriend’s response. _Oh no, take your time. Dyin’ down here, but it’s fine. Everything is fine._

**Castiel**

Time stood still as he watched the hopeful look in Dean’s eyes. _It’s only been a couple of months! This is so soon… no, actually, it’s not. We’ve been dancing around this for years, and who cares if it’s too soon, anyway? It’s_ **_Dean._ ** _Commitmentphobe Dean… the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen, inside and out… asking_ **_me_ ** _to marry him._

It wasn’t a question after that. Cas nodded quickly, dropping down to his knees to meet Dean and pulling him into a frantic, consuming kiss. “Yes! Holy shit, yes!” The second Dean wrapped his arms around him, Cas pushed forward, tackling Dean onto the bank’s floor, kissing all over his face. “Let’s go right now,” he hurried out between frenzied pecks, “before you change your mind.”

Jask cleared his throat loudly, but Cas didn’t care. He’d take Dean right there in front of everyone if he had to — he needed him, and nothing in the world would get between them again. 

“Me? We need to hurry before _you_ wise up, not me. I’m here as long as you’ll have me, baby. I love you.” Dean gripped the sides of his face and held him still, bringing their lips together as everyone else around them disappeared.

“I love you too, Dean.” Cas smiled so widely that Dean ended up kissing his teeth instead of his lips, which made them both laugh. Neither one of them bothered saying goodbye before going home, there would be plenty of time to celebrate with their friends and family _after_ they celebrated together… repeatedly. 

Cas made love to Dean slowly that night, rocking into him gently until they spilled over almost by accident. For all of their fears, Cas knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that neither one of them would be backing out of this, so that simmering fire could burn as long and as hot as it chose to — they had all the time in the world. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, that's that. The penultimate chapter. Friday's last installment is titled "Carry On" in honor of the show's finale; but regardless of what happens tomorrow, don't let the title scare you. It's 100% smut and fluff. No angst in sight. See you then!


	33. Carry On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't want to sound prideful or anything, but... mine's better.

**Dean**

The maid outfit had been burning a hole in Dean’s closet for way too long. He had it dry cleaned soon after it arrived, and although that might have been the most embarrassing moment of his life, he definitely didn’t regret it. After a very vivid dream about it, he decided it was time. 

Cas was downstairs making breakfast, so Dean laid it out neatly on his bed and made his way down there. He was already rocking a semi, and was sure there was no hiding it, so he didn’t try. “Mornin’ gorgeous.” Dean walked over and tugged on Cas’ hair, kissing him deeply before turning to pour some coffee.

Breathless already, Cas clutching the edge of the counter behind him. “That was… a very nice way to say good morning.” 

“Mmhmm... had a dream about you.” Dean bit his lip and looked down at his erection. “Wanna know what it was about?”

“Yes,” Cas said immediately, dropping to his knees to mouth over the fabric covering his crotch. “Tell me. Whatever it is, I’ll do it.”

“Cas...” Dean gripped the counter, almost forgetting the damn dream and taking what was right in front of him. “Shit...” he reached down to cup Cas’ chin. “You... got— gotta go look at your bed first, sweetheart.”

Curiosity lined Cas’ face but he reluctantly got up, kissing Dean once before adjusting his  _ own  _ half chub and making his way up the stairs. A moment later, his door shut with a loud thud. 

Dean palmed himself and forced some coffee down his throat. He closed his eyes, picturing Cas sliding the outfit up his long, beautiful legs and shuddered, setting the coffee aside and making his way towards the couch. 

His semi was a thing of the past and his fully rock hard cock leaked inside his boxers.  _ Is he gonna open himself? Or let me do it? _ Dean groaned, becoming more impatient by the second. Thankfully for him, he didn’t have to wait too much longer; as Cas strode down the stairs, he caught a glimpse of fishnet stockings disappearing under a black and white skirt, and he groaned at the sight. “Fuck, sweetheart...” 

Cas rounded the bottom of the stairs and posed in a way that probably made him feel awkward, but Dean had to grip his clothed cock from how hot he was. “Turn around for me, baby... Pretend you’re picking something up.” He reached inside and pulled himself out as Cas twirled slowly, then bent down to touch his toes. 

“Like this?” He wiggled his ass, that poofed-out skirt rising just high enough that Dean could make out the jockstrap underneath. 

“Fuck... yes... C’mere.” Dean slid his hand up and down his length as Cas approached. “Do that again.” 

When Cas complied, Dean reached to grip his ass, sliding his hand along the soft skin with a growl. “Ass is mine.” He slapped his hand down and leaned forward to bite the pink skin as Cas moaned, pushing back until Dean slid his tongue between those perfect cheeks. 

The noise Cas made was unreal, and had Dean reaching up between his legs to palm his cock as he dove in deeper, his head fully buried under that skirt. Dean did the best he could with his tongue and then nibbled along his ass while lubing up his fingers. “Bend over the couch.” He stood, letting Cas take his place, and slid two digits inside him. “Fuck, I want you so bad, baby. Tell me how much you want my cock.”

_ “Please, _ Dean,” Cas gasped, rocking back to take his fingers deeper. “I…” He dropped his forehead to the back of the couch and let out a whine, “I need you, need your cock. Fuck me, Dean,  _ please.” _

Dean pulled out his fingers and shoved his shorts completely off. Once his cock was lubed, he slid in painfully slowly. “So damn tight, sweetheart.” They groaned in unison as he bottomed out, and Dean reached to tug on Cas’ hair, pulling him in for a sloppy kiss as he began to fuck him. He could feel himself getting closer to the edge and slammed inside, sitting there a moment before sliding out and tapping Cas’ ass. “Ride me, baby.”

Ever a fucking tease, Cas maneuvered shakily off the couch and turned around slowly, raising his arms above his head and bending them so his hands were clasped together between his shoulder blades. The stretch showed off every curve and hard line of his body, and Dean reached out for him only for Cas to twirl just out of his grasp. “If you want me to ride you, we do it my way.” 

_ Jesus fuck, okay. _ Dean bit his lip and sat back, resting both hands on the side of the couch as Cas played with his skirt, giving him little peeks of flushed skin and that pretty, abused hole. “Cas…”

“Hm?” He turned, straddling Dean’s lap and folding a hand carefully across Dean’s throat, gently squeezing the sides as he started to grind down. “I forgot to clean.” Cas ghosted his lips over Dean’s jaw and flicked his tongue over his earlobe, then bit it before whispering, “Are you gonna spank me for it?” 

Dean thrust up into him, slapping then gripping against his ass. “You want a spankin’, darlin’? Cause my  _ wife _ needs to ride me soon, or I will spank  _ and _ edge him.”

“Fuck,” Cas moaned, rolling his hips and gasping at the feel of Dean splitting him open. He moved a little faster then stopped entirely, sliding up until Dean’s cock bounced against his own stomach. “What makes you think that’s not  _ exactly  _ what I want?”

Dean gripped his hips and moved him. In one swift movement, Cas was on his knees on the ground, face pressed into the cushion, and Dean slapped his ass just before shoving two fingers inside his tight channel. “You asked for it.” 

Leaning down, Dean nudged Cas’ legs apart and ducked down to suck the head of his cock into his mouth. He scissored his hole, wishing he could suck more of Cas’ length, but sucking dick from the back was easier said than done, especially while multitasking.

Mumbling obscenities, Cas’ back arched, giving Dean about another half an inch. The second he got louder, Dean broke all contact and swung the tip of his fingers upward, watching that perfect ass bounce. “More, Dean. Do it again.” 

Happy to oblige, Dean rubbed the skin to warm it up a bit, alternating between that and spanking until Cas’ ass was flushed a deep pink and he was rutting against the front of the couch, moaning like a whore. 

“You’re so fucking hot, sweetheart.” Dean lined up and slid inside with a groan, instantly starting a quick pace.  _ Not even gonna make it to him riding me, goddamnit! _ “Fu— Cas.” Dean slowed down and slapped his ass, but Cas flung a hand behind him to push him back until Dean was slipping out again. 

“Sit… fuck. Sit down,” Cas gasped, not even giving Dean time to move before he was planting a hand on Dean’s chest and shoving him to the ground. He picked up the maid skirt and straddled him instantly, sliding down in one swift movement and beginning to bounce. “Tell — tell me I’m not allowed to come.” 

_ Ah sh— fuck… “Casss... _ don’t you dare fucking come.” Dean reached under the skirt and gripped the base of Cas’ cock, staring up at the most beautiful man he’s ever laid eyes upon.

“Dean!” Cas cried out, his head tipping back as he leaned to brace his hands on Dean’s thighs, impaling himself on Dean’s cock and grinding his abused ass down. “Fill me up, come inside of me, mark me, make me — fuck, Dean,  _ please —”  _ Cas clenched around Dean’s cock, his whole body seizing up as he fought off his own orgasm. 

Dean released Cas’ cock and grabbed his hips, slamming inside as he emptied with a groan. He moved in small, deep circles as he came down, staring up at Cas’ throbbing cock. “You’re fucking amazing, beautiful. You wanna come?”

“Please, Dean.” Cas rutted against the air so hard Dean’s softening cock nearly slipped out, but Dean wasn’t about to let that happen. He held him in place, fisting a hand around Cas’ leaking cock and smirking up at him. 

“Stay still, you can come when I say so.” Dean began stroking Cas exactly the way he loved, and every time Cas’ body began to tremble, Dean would stop and grind himself up into Cas’ ass. After the fourth time, his heavy cock slipped out and Dean felt his come drip down, making him shudder.

The pleas that slipped past Cas’ lips were quiet and needy, his thighs shaking and sweat coating his body. “Please, Dean. Please let me come, please…” He whined, and something primal took hold in Dean. 

“Stand up.” 

Cas stood unsteadily, and Dean slipped his head under Cas’ skirt and licked the precome dripping out of his cock. “Take what you need, sweetheart.” He opened his mouth further as Cas bucked his hips so eagerly that his cock glanced off Dean’s cheek. “Slow down, baby. We’ll get there.” He corrected, pulling Cas’ cock into his mouth as Cas rocked forward and pinned Dean’s head to his crotch as he stuffed himself clear down Dean’s throat. 

Relaxing his throat, Dean closed his eyes, feeling just how unglued Cas really was. He was fucking into Dean’s mouth like he would die if he didn’t come soon, and when his thrusts began to falter, Dean hummed.

“Shit…” The word came out so quietly that Dean could barely hear it under all the fabric, but the reasoning behind it was clear as Cas released, humping his face until Dean was nearly choking on all of Cas’ come. 

Dean pushed past the gag and let Cas take all the time he needed before sliding himself out. His legs wobbled and Dean took advantage, shoving him back slightly so he’d fall, catching him before his ass landed too hard onto his lap. With a grin, he leaned in to kiss along Cas’ neck and whisper in his ear, “You’re my favorite thing about every single day.” Maybe it was cheesy, but it was all he had in the moment.

Gasping, Cas dropped his head to Dean’s shoulder. “Can we  _ please  _ have fucking breakfast now?”

**Castiel**

“Dean, will you please pay attention?” Cas frowned over his laptop screen as Dean leaned back, cursing at the television and not paying a lick of attention to him.  _ This is what I get for trying to do this during a game.  _ “I’m not wearing any underwear.” Nothing. “Or panties, for that matter.” 

“Huh?” Dean looked over and caught on quickly. “Oh... sorry.” He lowered the volume and cleared his throat. “What was the question?”

He smiled softly, shaking his head. “Finish your game, this can wait another couple of hours. I’ll make dinner.” Cas stood, setting his computer aside and padding over to the kitchen, digging through the freezer for a pizza. Dean didn’t follow, so Cas assumed he agreed to the plan, and set about actually baking the thing. 

Almost an hour later, he set a plate down in front of Dean and sat next to him, his eyes fixed to the screen. It was a rerun of last year’s National Championship game between the Helltown Hunters and the Acheron Manticores. “The… guy with the ball has a nice ass.”

Dean turned towards him with a frown, then leaned in to tackle him back onto the couch. “Who?” He slipped perfectly between Cas’ legs and nipped his Adam’s apple. “Who has a nice ass,  _ wife?” _

Absolutely everything about that did something for Cas, and he was determined to see how far he could push it, fuck playing it safe. “Number twenty-four… I think they said earlier he’s the safety, they called him Lightning. The one that just ran that trick play.”

Dean grabbed the remote and turned off the tv, sucking a mark on his neck with a growl. “Fuck him.”

“It wouldn’t be hard, I  _ am  _ still open from earlier...” Cas gasped, rocking his hips up and clutching onto Dean. “But we need to do this. The… project,” he clarified. 

“This ass is mine, and  _ only _ mine,  _ Castiel. _ I will not share.” Dean rutted against his sore ass and then sat up. “Alright, project time.” He offered a toothless smile and took a bite of pizza, completely ignoring the mess he’d made of Cas.

As much as he deeply loved the pet names, few things on planet Earth did more for him than hearing Dean say his full name like that, especially so possessively. He’d never admit it again, but he let out a soft whimper at the lust coursing through his veins and tried desperately to blink it away, as if it wasn’t something that  _ constantly  _ simmered just under the surface when Dean was around. “Have I told you lately that I love you with all of me?”

“Nope. Say it again.” Dean stopped chewing and closed his eyes to listen. Cas squirmed to sit back up, leaning close to him.

“I love you with all of me.” He planted a kiss to Dean’s cheek and then stood, swiping a piece of pizza as he made his way back to his own chair. “Now, I need to get your thoughts on the project. I need you to be honest with me, Dean. Even if you think parts of it will hurt my feelings, you can make it up to me later. I need the truth, or this whole thing will have been moot.”

“Don’t wanna be a moot. I’m here, sweetheart. I solemnly swear to tell the whole truth or... whatever. Wait, is solemnly swear the Harry Potter one?”

“That you’re up to no good? Yes, that’s the one. We’re not even going to discuss the moot thing, I just…” Cas shook his head with a fond smile, then opened his laptop again. “How did you feel at the beginning? What were your feelings toward me?”

“I thought you had the nicest ass I ever seen.” He huffed a laugh as he took a drink of his water, but choked on it when he saw Cas’ face. “Okay, okay. So, I dunno. At first, I just wanted to help you out, and I didn’t think it would be that big a deal. Not seeing anyone else was gonna be easy, I’d rather hang with you, anyway. But then I found myself getting aroused at like...  _ everything _ you did, and realized those feelings were comin’ back... or they never left? Like they were sitting just below the surface and then you’d smile at me and my chest would tighten.” Dean blushed and then scratched the back of his neck. “Uh... sorry... that wasn’t what you meant when you asked, huh?”

The urge to shove his project aside and kiss Dean until they were both dizzy was nearly overpowering, but he reminded himself to stay professional. “Nothing you tell me here will be wrong, Dean. If you want, I can tell you my side of things now… or, I can just let you read my paper when it’s finished. It’s up to you, I’m open either way.”

“Yeah... I wanna hear some of yours, too.” Dean relaxed some, but put the rest of his pizza aside, turning to give Cas his full attention.

“Okay,” Cas started. “When you first offered your help, I was… leery. I wasn’t sure if you’d be able to follow through with not being with anyone else. I was obviously aware that you’re the best looking human being ever born, but I was convinced we were just friends. You were my best friend, closer to me than my own twin. I accepted your help because I thought it would deepen our friendship, and I could loosely apply the same principle to an actual relationship. I was… shocked, actually, when I realized how I truly felt.”

Dean nodded and sat back with his legs spread wide as he thought about how to respond. “That makes sense. Best looking human being ever born, huh?” He grinned cockily with his bottom lip between his teeth.

Again, Cas had to force himself to stay seated. “Yes, though that isn’t the point. Moving on… what happened after our first kiss?”

Dean’s smile faded but he kept his attention on Cas. “Well... I kinda internally freaked out. I wasn’t sure if you’d be mad at me for taking advantage of you.”

“Funnily enough, I had similar fears, though not until a little later. That first kiss, I was convinced you didn’t see me like that. It seemed so… dull, and I kept comparing it in my mind to how I’d seen you kiss your other partners, your real partners. I thought we lacked passion.” The thought was laughable now; that fire burned so constantly hot that Cas could barely think straight around Dean. 

Dean held a hand over his heart. “Ouch. No passion? Nah, you’re right. I definitely pulled back because I didn’t want to make you feel like I was just horny. Although, I was. I wanted to have more fun with those strawberries too, but not the point. I didn’t think you’d want that with me. Cause... you’re like way out of my league.”

Another thought that was laughable, though Cas kept his face neutral. “Dean, I don’t consider myself out of your league, nor do I feel you’re out of mine. We’re almost perfectly matched in every way.” He typed a few notes on his laptop and then took a breath. “Are there any dates that stick out in your mind as being particularly helpful?”

“Uh, yeah... actually. You remember the one when we did that love language thing?” Dean’s freckles shone brightly around his beautiful blush as he spoke. “I hated almost all of the quiz part... but I liked what I learned about you... and myself.”

“I think that was a tipping point, honestly,” Cas agreed. “I think it helped us both be more honest about what we wanted, what we were craving from each other. As much as it pains me to admit this, I think the dates that embarrassed me helped the most.”

“Really? Those were fun as hell, but I kinda like attention. I know you don’t. Why did they help you?” Dean leaned forward on his knees to listen intently.

Cas blushed under Dean’s gaze and softened his voice. “I hated them at the time, but... I knew you’d never laugh at me. That no matter what the rest of the world said, as long as I was making you smile, I didn’t care how stupid I looked. They pushed me out of my comfort zone and showed me how much I could trust you, even in situations where I wasn’t comfortable.”

Dean smiled warmly. “Yeah, I feel the same. You can always trust me, Cas. With everything... always. But even more now...  _ fiancé. _ God, I can’t wait to marry you.”

Butterflies let themselves loose in Cas’ stomach. He still couldn’t believe Dean had proposed, and he was sure the feeling wouldn’t be going away anytime soon. “One day soon, you’ll be able to call me ‘wife’ again, with some sincerity this time.” He smiled, watching the way Dean’s eyes lit up with playful promise. “Before we get distracted, I have a couple more questions. What do you think were the least helpful parts?”

“Um... me letting myself be a punching bag didn’t help us at all, but as far as the book specifically... I didn’t think the whole ‘go live’ or ‘upload to your Facebook’ shit helped much. We didn’t need to  _ show _ people we’re havin’ fun, ya know?”

Cas nodded, making the necessary notes. “While I’d prefer that you hadn’t done it, you can’t say it didn’t help. Yes, we handled it badly to begin with, but… think of what happened after. I forgave you without even needing all the facts, and Jimmy actually came back. I have a relationship with my twin again, because of you.” He still couldn’t talk about it without getting the good kind of emotional, and he blinked back tears as he tried to move on. “Last question for now. Do you think we’d have eventually gotten together, even without the book’s influence?”

“I do. Honestly. I dunno how long it would have taken me, but I would have wised up eventually, sweetheart. I gotta believe that. What do you think?”

That answer was complicated. “I would like to agree with you, but I don’t think it would’ve been that simple. I was always a little jealous when you brought someone home, but I fear it would’ve taken until you had an actual significant other for me to realize the depth and reasoning behind that jealousy, and by then, it might’ve been too late.” Cas frowned at the thought, then finally moved his computer off his lap and went over to crawl into Dean’s. 

Dean wrapped his strong arms around him and nuzzled into his neck. “Cas... I always found something wrong with all of them. The book helped me realize that everyone else was wrong because they weren’t you. I only want you, forever.”

The words rang true, and Cas melted into his embrace. “Then you’ve got me, Dean. Forever.”

“Yeah?” Dean flipped Cas onto the couch and hovered over him. “Me and that douchebag, number 24, huh?” He started tickling Cas, not giving him a moment to breathe. When he finally let up, he slammed their mouths together, rutting down against Cas. 

Logically, he knew he should finish his paper while their talk was still fresh in his mind, but he couldn’t bring himself to pull away from Dean. 

He could write it in the morning.   
  


###  ~~~~ 

_ Did I expect any of this to happen? Maybe, maybe not. The subconscious mind prepares for a litany of things of which the conscious mind isn’t ever quite aware. But one thing is certain about all of this: The Pathokinesis Project was a success by any measurable rate, and I would recommend it to any couples who want to get out of their comfort zones; both as individuals, and as partners.  _

_ The fifty dates encouraged communication, trust, openness, camaraderie, and most of all, love. It allowed me to personally explore Sternberg’s triangular theory, and experience firsthand how intimacy, passion, and commitment each play vital roles in forming and sustaining a lasting relationship. Will mine last? Maybe, maybe not… but I’d like to think we’ve got a better shot than most.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for seeing this through. 
> 
> I know there are a lot of people leaving this fandom, and I honestly haven't decided yet if I'm one of them - but I've got at least two more fics and a one shot already ready to go, so I'm not going anywhere just yet. See you next week.


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